I solemnly swear that I’m about to show you the best BBQ pulled pork this side of the Mason Dixon!
You don't have to be old to understand that stoick is ABUSIVE. He never listens to hiccup, like when hiccup says he doesn't want to fight dragons and stoick MAKES HIM ANYWAY. Or when he tells hiccup he's not his son...oh but it's all ok because once hiccup is cool stoick loves him. Stoick is an asshole and he's not a good parent, and if you think he is then you're probably abusive too.