poor jean!!!

  • Me: It's okay to be unsure of your gender/sexuality!!1! It's totally cool to be figuring yourself out!
  • Me @ me: except you bc u need to get ur stuff together and figure out what the heck u are right now immediately

levi-snk  asked:

Mama, how would the 104th and vets react if Eren and Levi started dating?

Mikasa: Judge Levi hard for dating Eren
Reiner: Judge Levi hard for dating someone at all
Bertholdt: Doesn’t care really
Annie: Thinks Eren has poor taste
Jean: Eren, you’re gross!
Marco: Nice for them :)
Sasha: Eren r u sure?!
Connie: Pictures in his head about Levi having sex
Historia: Tells Levi to better be careful, because of the power dynamics
Armin: I don’t think dating your superior is a good idea, Eren…
Ymir: Okay, wtf guys?!
Hanji: Levi, remember to always use protection!
Erwin: Levi, I think you have a problem….
Nanaba: uhm okay, whatever you guys are up to, I guess…
Mike: *softly* don’t
Moblit: :/ okay

edwardelricistheawesomeness  asked:

Omg. I need Levi and Jean competing for Erens affection and Eren being oblivious. I need this like I need air.

Levi glowered back at the arrogant punk that was Jean Kirshstein. Shit brown to steel grey - according to him. The reason being, both he and the young brat were after the same person, apparently Levi had unknowingly came on to this kid`s “territory” when Eren and his squad had been alone with him.

“Back off ole man, You`re three years too late and about fifty years too old.” The horse-faced fuck smirked. Levi remained unfazed, despite him fuming at the idea that a shit stain like this was trying to get his grubby hooves on his Eren.

“How do you know Eren doesn`t want a real man?” Levi bit out, an indignant squawk from the boy, “Y`know, perhaps he prefers balls that have already drop?”

“I-I! A-as if you can still get it up! What are you, fifty?” Jean countered.

Levi huffed in cruel amusement. “I can use mine just fine, you on the other hand… I don`t think anyone really wants a thumb up their ass.”

Levi almost felt bad for that one, poor kid was speechless. But he was intruding on his and Eren`s courtship that had been going fine before the lousy new cadets trounced in. He was the center of Eren`s world and now this pony was trying to throw it off balance.

“Captain!”

The two of them turned quickly to see Eren jogging up to them, well actual, Levi, much to Jean`s displeasure. Eren smiled brightly at him as he stopped in a proper salute.

“Captain Levi, it`s time for combat training, I was…. uh, wondering if you`d be my partner?” Eren mumbled, confidence slowly ebbing away as he spoke. Levi`s hard gaze softened to mush as he nodded firmly, his chest fluttering at the way Eren lit up.

And of fucking course Seabiscuit had to make his insignificant presence known.

“Uh, hey Eren, why not train with me?” He pipes up, a cocky smile on his face. Eren`s happy smile dampens immediately.

“No.” He says flatly, Jean isn`t deterred.

“Aw, you chicken Jaeger?” He coos.

“No! I could take you!”

“Prove it then, train with me!”

Levi`s eye twitches at the obvious tactic, Jean using poor Eren`s temper against him is unacceptable. He pulls Eren away from his face off with the smug cadet and into his chest.

“Eren needs an actual challenge, not some play fight with a little boy like you.” He humphs, he can feel Eren smirk at the praise in disguise.

Jean is once again speechless, and can`t do anything as he opens and closes his mouth like a fish, hoping a decent comeback will emerge from it. Levi drags Eren off with a smirk on his face.

Levi: 1

Jean: -0