poll booths

UK General Election

This is a call to arms. If you are British, if you are signed up to the elctoral register, if you have your polling card:

Go out and vote.

This is not a joke anymore. You can’t sit back and let everyone else try and change things, because there are hundreds of thousands of people who will be doing the exact same thing. We cannot afford to be politically apathetic. We cannot afford to let this go on any longer.

Fight back. Don’t let these reverse Robin Hoods rake your hard earned cash from you under the guise of ‘austerity’, all the while putting that cash firmly in the pockets of their wealthy friends.

Do not allow these self serving, pro class-divide monsters take away a nearly 70 year old institution that has prolonged and saved and began so many British lives. Refuse to pay for the privilege of being unwell, of being injured, of having a child, of being disabled or in need of a sensory aid.

I for one will be at that polling booth on June 8th, putting my cross in that box that spells a better, brighter, more socially and economically just future for our youngest, oldest, poorest and sickest. Anyone but the Tories, anyone but Blue, anyone but the Nasty Party.

Please vote next Thursday. Your voice and your life matters just as much as theirs - speak up.

Six snap election outcomes

1. We have all misunderstood the nature of a snap election. It is in fact decided by the leaders of the different political parties playing a game of snap. Sadly, nobody bothered to check the backgrounds of the party leaders. Amongst his many other achievements, Paul Nuttall was the 2005 winner of the Global Snap Federation Champions’ Cup. We are screwed.

2. The UK’s left-wing parties form a progressive alliance, which immediately splits into successive depressive, subversive and implosive alliances. The Tories and UKIP fight back with a surprise retrogressive alliance. Arron Banks forms an aggressive alliance with a grumpy bulldog. A pissed-off bag of chips starts the unimpressive alliance and ends up winning with a landslide. It is a landslide of chips. Britain ends up buried in chips which is, let’s face it, better than most of the other outcomes.

3. No, actually I was wrong. It is a snap election because there will be a crocodile in every polling booth. It costs a lot to import that many crocodiles but that’s the price you have to pay for bringing the country together. Surprise! Word to the wise: Crocodiles vote green, apart from the brown ones which usually spoil their ballots and the kind of grey ones which are actually made of concrete.

4. The outcome is disunity. The prescription: elections will continue until unity improves.

5. The time is shortly after the election, and if you listen carefully in the Silicon whatnots of the country you can hear the disruptive technologies brewing. This time they are making micronations. By automating small-scale national functions using an AI diplomatic service, outsourcing coinage and passport production, and making your border out of drones and string, well. Isn’t it so much easier now to declare independence? Scotland will do it the old-fashioned way, of course. London will opt for a mixed approach, with a complicated shared custody agreement for Buckingham Palace. Oxford and Cambridge will go next, followed in due course by most of the other cities. It will not all be bad news for England, though: the newly-reshaped country will be able to get a lucrative agreement to advertise Swiss cheese.

6. Just as we are about to go to the polls, Larry the cat sits on the big red button that activates the Queen. Now sixty metres tall and the length of Belgium, the Queen will solve Britain’s problems at a stroke by eating it. The showdown in the mid-Atlantic as the nations of the world try to stop her going after Canada will be spectacular. Sadly, however, we will not be there to see it.

Immigrants are literally more patriotic than Americans. We literally appreciate this country more than Americans lol

Y'all literally don’t care bout your civic duties even when you know it’s a privilege
Y'all literally take democracy for granted then complain when the thing you were supposed to protect is not working right because you didn’t want to participate
In the process
Y'all bitch and moan about America but can’t walk your asses over to a polling booth
Won’t bother to learn the name of your congressman
Constantly devalue the veterans and don’t acknowledge that many literally had to be vets because of people y'all CHOSE to elect into congress which created economic strains and also were were war mongers
People born with the privilege of being Americans are so fucking tragic and unaware, lol
I know immigrants who won’t think twice about raising arms and defending this country till death but all you born-Americans know is how to bitch
Like do y'all even fucking realize the privilege it is to be born an American automatically?
Some people have to work years for that, save and scrape,some people have risked their lives to be here and y'all have the fucking audacity to act like yall don’t have the power to change things.
Give me a break
Immigrants will always be better
They’re even better at being Real Patriots

anonymous asked:

There is something really unsettling about Jeff Azoff's omnipresent position in Harry's life. Like it isn't just in his professional domain, but completely over his private life (holidays, family events etc). It brings to mind Colonel Parker and Elvis, that total control at all times. The way Jeff shadows Harry absolutely everywhere (to a polling booth for goodness sake!) as if he considers him a flight risk. I wonder how isolated Jeff keeps him from real life and other people at this point?

Hi anon! I know other blogs have pointed out those are tactics abusers use. I’m uncomfortable speculating about that due to my own history.

SHHH… LET YOUR PARENTS LIE IN

THE big problem today, of course, is how to stop our parents voting.

You just know they’ll do the wrong thing. Waddle down to the polling booth with their wrinkled heads full of xenophobia and Werther’s Originals.

And before you know it we’ll have given up the NHS, cut the police entirely and have armed a legion of extremists through Saudi Arabia.

So the civic thing to do is to stop them voting.

Here are a few suggestions as to how:

1.       Just don’t wake them up. Let them rest for a little bit longer, just to get in a bit of practice for their impending death.

2.       If you have a father, bring him a picture of an immigrant to shout at for a bit. For your mother, might I recommend an ironing board and a boxset of Strictly Come Dancing? Conservative voters won’t think twice about the sexist implications of your gifts and should be sufficiently pacified whilst you can nip round to the polls.

3.       Double up on their medication. Those arthritis pills? Why give them a couple more. It’s not as if they’ll be able to remember, with their feeble boomer brains. With any luck, they’ll be out like a light.

4.       Print off some fake polling cards and recycle theirs. Fire up Word and mock up a couple of forgeries; they don’t even have to be particularly professional looking. It’s not as if they understand how technology works.

5.       Turn off their life support. Just fucking kill them. Why not?


@TheSun hire me

i don’t understand how this even a close race at all!!!! how the hell do you go into that polling booth and check that box for donald fucking trump how the fuck!!!!!!!! do you do that!!!!!!!! how do you make that choice and half of this fuckivgn country did it!!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU

This is what Theresa May and Jeremy Corbyn’s constituents think of them

In the polling booth next Thursday, millions of people will imagine they are choosing between Theresa May and Jeremy Corbyn.

But in reality just a few hundred thousand will actually get the chance to vote for them.

These are the people who, in theory, could kick Theresa May out of Number 10, or oust Jeremy Corbyn without the Parliamentary Labour Party having to lift a finger.

They are the two party leaders’ constituents – and this video shows what they think of their MPs.

For Mrs May in the Berkshire town of Maidenhead, and Mr Corbyn in trendy Islington North, there is little to worry about.

Both have been MPs for decades and have substantial majorities in excess of 20,000.

They also, it seems, have broad support among voters.

Democracy Isn’t Working!

This is the message from Mega-City One Justice Department in 2134, if you don’t want this to be your future, get yourself to the polling booth by 7 May 2015.

You have been warned!

Poster art: Paul Marshall.

Looking through the “third party candidate” tag, I’m positively horrified by the number of people saying that voting third party is like voting for Trump. For swing states, that definitely holds true. IF YOU LIVE IN A SWING STATE, DO NOT VOTE THIRD PARTY

Furthermore, I see so many people saying that the time to vote third party is when both the candidates are moderates. The problem with this logic is that there will never be a moderate republican candidate, not within the next 20 years, which is a critical period for us and our democracy. Decades of bible thumping and courting of racists, homophobes, and xenophobes has left a base of republican voters that is even farther right than the party itself.

Swing states are:  Colorado, Florida, Iowa, Minnesota, North Carolina, New Hampshire, Nevada, Ohio, Virginia, and Wisconsin.

However, many of these posts are completely disregarding progressives in solid red states, and conservatives in solid blue states. The way that the electoral college system is structured, voting democrat in a republican state (or vice-versa) is effectively wasting your vote, since the outcome in that state was decided before anyone even entered the polling booth. Heck, even voting Democrat in a Democrat state, or Republican in a Republican state would be wasting your vote, since there are so many other voters that your vote wouldn’t have been the vote that wins the state.

Remember, in the general election, the popular vote does not matter

To third party candidates, however, the popular vote is a big deal.

Here’s why: Third party candidates aren’t guaranteed to be on the ballot in a given state like the D or R candidates are. HOWEVER, if a third party candidate gets 5% or more of the popular vote (popular vote, not electoral college vote) their party:

  • Is able to collect federal funding: $9.5 Million from the Presidential Election Campaign Fund
  • Can collect donations through Super PACS - as much as we hate them, they’re important to raise money
  • Can participate in the debates
  • Allows that party’s candidates equal ballot access - they’ll be on the ballot in ALL states next election

For the next election cycle - the 2020 election.

 If you were to instead cast your vote to a third party candidate, like Libertarian candidate Gary Johnson or Green candidate Jill Stein, in a non-battleground state, it could end up being your vote that puts them over the 5% needed.
If you’re in a state that is probably going to vote one way or another, but is still in the margin of error, then perhaps find another reluctant supporter of the opposite candidate (i.e: if you’re a reluctant Clinton supporter, find a reluctant Trump supporter) and make an agreement with them to both vote third party - make sure that this person is trustworthy, however, as they could just as easily break their agreement when election day comes ‘round.

TL;DR: If you’re in a state that’s already guaranteed to go in a specific direction, feel free to vote third party.

If you’re in a battleground/swing state, PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DO NOT VOTE THIRD PARTY