pocketfull

Pukwudgie headcannons

- they are over the top drama queens about everything but mostly their home remedies
- everything might as well be a drug transaction
- “hey, pshh, hey you, you want some drugs?” “are you talking about those pills that get rid of my cat’s allergy” “man you really know how to kill the mood”
- “i got the stuff” “just give me my damn ibuprofen”
- feeling ill??? drink tea, lots of tea, with honey,
- “do you want a jar of honey?” “why???” “fucking flu season, it’ll kill you if you don’t get your shit together”
- they have an endless supply of everything
- pocketfulls of homemade cough drops
- current theory is that the real pukwudgies act as suppliers for anything the pukwudgie students need
- “why don’t you just buy the stuff instead?” “not everyone has there ass full of money kevin, plus i profit off of this”
- they are sharks, if you borrow money or owe them anything they will hunt you down
- a thunderbird went missing
- they were found and still in one piece but still
- the older pukwudgies will fucking murder anyone who makes their younger housemates cry
- they know alot about poison, stuff that’s not even allowed at ilvermorny
- the wampus house has a betting pool and if there’s trouble getting money they call a pukwudgie
- they are all about ‘good vibes’
- “you’re really killing my vibes”
- except the ones who aren’t who respond with “are you fucking high or something, what are you gonna do next??? start throwing peace signs around”
- they do, ironically of course (it’s not ironic, at least not any more)
- contests on who can drink the most coffee, no one ever really sleeps after that
- late night conversations that are so random
- “once a penguin bit my finger” “ what the hell???”
- “who thought chocolate and peanut butter was a good idea??? bc man were they right"
- “how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop?” “378” “what the fuck?”
- “im really gay” “that’s nice, me too except im really bi”
- they always end up laughing so hard that their sides hurt
- pukwudgies who tell you to get your shit together and don’t sugarcoat anything
- “my boyfriend wants to go out but im not feeling it” “then dont”
- “there’s just so much going on” “then take a break”
- putting their foot down and telling you to take care of yourself first, that it’s okay not to hang out with friends and it’s okay wanting to be alone
- they give the best advice but that’s only bc the real pukwudgies have a soft spot for daytime tv and the student pukwudgies end up hearing about all the morals of the story
- some pukwudgies are not really into the whole home remedy thing and instead get hella cool archery lessons from real pukwudgies and watch over their younger housemates
- profits from selling home remedies are split evenly throughout the house (there’s a lot of money to go around), or used to buy things for the common room like a tv so when real pukwudgies visit they can can watch all the tv they want
- the pukwudgies are really fond of the other pukwudgies, both sides deny this but it’s the truth

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this is a weekend, my whole summer holiday will probably be like this.

Clouds and sun did battle in the sky yesterday, spring blue versus heavy, sweeping, lowdown grey. On a beach on the North Shore, no wind blew, and low tide’s lapping waves licked the edge of shore. The sand called for attention, as it always does. Eyes scoured for good luck rocks, pretty shells, dead crabs, beach glass. The sky demanded it, too, the drama unfolding above, light dark cold warm rain shine. On the walk back, I found I’d drifted up to where beach met rising earth, a scramble of low brush and storm-scarred trees. There, eyes out not for shells or stones or crab limbs, but for driftwood, for branch fragments, smoothed and bleached and dedensified by salt water, friction, and wind. The carpentry work infiltrates and alters in unexpected ways. It used to be I’d come home from the beach with a pocketfull of shells. Now, wood. What luck to find a piece that looks like a rippled potato chip. They look like stones and bones, almost weightless in the palm.