OUR TOP TEN FRESHEST MULLETS OF ALL TIME
Because a definitive mullet ranking was something the world needed, obviously.
(created in collaboration with @supremepsychogoddess )
1. Billy Ray Cyrus
The curator of the mullet. There will never be another. This mullet is first in our achy breaky hearts.
2. Alexander Hamilton
Founding mullet father Alexander Hamilton knew the meaning of “business in the front, party in the back” long before its time.
3. Blake Shelton
Before he was crooning country ballads and judging up-and-coming singers on the Voice, he was up-and-coming in the mullet world.
4. Keith Kogane (Voltron: Defender of the Universe)
We know Legendary Defender Keith has a mullet of his own (as
Lance reminds us nearly every episode), but the true mullet icon was his 80s
5. The White Guy in Your English Comp Class
We don’t know him. But we can guarantee that mullet is solid. Even if there’s a MAGA hat on top of it.
6. Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris once encountered a wild mullet, and he scared it into sticking to his head. Or something like that. We’ve heard a couple stories going around.
7. David Bowie
We weren’t so sure about putting Bowie on this list, because he’s a celestial being that transcends space and time, but we’ve gotta admit if anyone could make a mullet look classy, it was Bowie.
8. Ben Franklin
Another iconic mullet in history, but not quite up to A-Ham’s level. Regardless, it’s a valiant effort.
9. Ellen DeGeneres
A female mullet pioneer. We salute you, Ellen, for your time of bravery.
10. Mario Lopez
Mario Lopez was his cutest in his mullet era. Don’t try to argue.