please ... this is satire

satire-please  asked:

Do you have a masterpost about 'I hope senpai doesn't notice me?' I'd love to know more about the idea and maybe the event that would take place with suzuki and senpai.

I’m currently working on the additional stuff and commonly asked info about the characters of this story concept!

For now, the tags on my blog are the only sources. 

I’ll update this post for more links when I’m done for future use!

satire-please  asked:

20: things you said that i wasn’t meant to hear (DamiTim shippy and I'm sorry, if I could drown you in hugs I would)

20. things you said that i wasn’t meant to hear

Damian is 23. Tim is however many years older than that.

~~

“I’m sorry.” Damian whispered into his chest. Tim almost missed it under the beeping of his heart monitor. “I’m so sorry, Beloved.”

Tim wanted to tell him it was okay. Reach out and stroke his hair, hold his hand, hold him

But he was paralyzed by a medically-induced coma. He should be asleep. Damian thought he was asleep. Unconscious and practically dead to the world.

“I…I love you. I know I call you Beloved, but I’ve never actually told you how much I love you.” Damian breathed. “I cannot live without you. I…I cannot let him live while you die.”

No.

Slowly, he felt Damian sit up. “It is the mantra of our family. Thou shall not kill.” Damian murmured. Tim fought against his own body. Anything to wake up and grab Damian before…before he made the biggest mistake of his life. “But for you I would. I will.”

‘Damian!’ He screamed, but it was only an echo in his mind. ‘Damian please no! Not that! Anything but that!’

“My grandfather will die for what he did to you. I don’t care if Father will hate me afterwards, I will see to it personally.” Damian’s chair scraped back, and suddenly he was kissing Tim’s head. Then his lips, like he were Snow White, or Sleeping Beauty. Sighed after a moment, when he was reminded that Tim, in fact, was neither. “Wait for me, Timothy. Or better yet, wake by the time I return. Because I will. No matter what, tortured, crippled, dying or already dead, I will return to you.”

Another kiss to his lips, and suddenly, Damian was too far away. 

“So rest well, Beloved.” Damian said as a goodbye, clueless to the fact that now Tim couldn’t. “I will be home soon.”

Eddsworld as interpreted by the fandom;

Tord now replaces Edd as the main character. The whole world circles around him; he is a badass and the coolest one out of the whole group. He is the overprotective edgy boyfriend and either; 1. nobody likes him because he is the ultimate outsider and very nihilistic/mildly suicidal or 2. He is an adorable smol bean who dresses up as a neko and must be protected (even though he’s a communist leader who’s killed people). Literally no other villains exist anymore. Tord is the only person outside of the main three worth mentioning. Basically he’s the Sans of Eddsworld.

Edd is the positive, naive, bubbly character who believes that everyone that can be good. He is the lovable true smol bean who can do no wrong and is too pure and good for this world. He has never sworn in his life or even thought anything outside the perimeter of angelic goodness. He is only there to be cute and a love interest for Tord or Matt.

Matt is literally the same as Edd besides the fact that he doesn’t like coke, is more vain, and is a little more stupid. The only reason people care about him is his vanity.

Tom is the only character besides Tord actually cared about and given considerable traits. He’s a full-blown alcoholic suffering with delirium and depression after Tord’s death and doesn’t care about anything or anyone except for his love/hate edgy angst relationship with Tord, and I mean he TOTALLY HAS FEELINGS FOR TORD because there’s so much subtext and they totally don’t hate eachother or anything and HOW CAN YOU NOT SEE THAT THEY’RE IN A RELATIONSHIP TOMTORD4EVAH

Patryck and Paul serve Tord and are gay. That’s it. That’s all we know and care to know about them.

Eduardo and Mark are both just assholes (Mark especially because he literally has no character.) Jon’s a little cute and sometimes he’s shipped with Eduardo but that’s about it.

satire-please  asked:

I loved Gasoline! Black Widow Tsuna was very enjoyable to read. I can just imagine after a while, the 9th finally clues in and corners Tsuna to say exhaustedly, "Tsuna...who will you keep as a husband?" And Tsuna taps a finger to her lips in thought and then states, "Xanxus." 'Cause Xanxus would never betray the Vongola and won't lay on hand on her without her permission.

It probably would end up being Xanxus, because he’s the only one not stupid enough to try to push her past where she’s willing to go. Unfortunately, by the time Tsuna’s done with all her various husbands and Timoteo finally ‘gets’ it, he would be extremely leery to the idea of marrying her. Because you know, black widows kill their husbands. 

In the early drafts, I had him marrying him first, and them kind of doing this dance where she’s watching him and making sure he’s not about to do something stupid, and Xanxus is ticking off a mental list of possible poison locations and recalling every ounce of manners he has because he’s not stupid - any woman that can go as far as Nana Sawada has is evidently a Big Predator, even if she doesn’t look it, and her daughter, for all her sweet nature, has been caught in a corner and is very much Not Happy.

It actually ends up working to where while they never have a necessarily romantic marriage, they have a very understanding one. Tsuna doesn’t get involved in Varia unless absolutely necessary, and while Xanxus never takes her to bed or kisses her if its not in front of a formal function as part of a ruse, he respects her and acknowledges her strength as Vongola Decima, and doesn’t try to rule ‘through’ her like most men would.

Either that, or it would end up being one of the strangest love-hate relationships around, with them starting off trying to kill each other and working their emotions out through gratuitous hate sex and Vongola Family Style Fights against the Varia that always end in ties. The trust comes from them trusting that the other is set enough in their ways not to deviate from the pattern they’ve got going, and that because their routine for as long as they both live.

But yeah, glad to hear you enjoyed it. :)

satire-please  asked:

“My hands are so cold, will you warm them?” Jondami shippy, preferably with Damian saying it cause Supers usually are very very warm.

Early/mid 20s. 

~~

Damian had already claimed that he was going to call the television station and get the meteorologist fired. They’d been calling for warm, clear weather all week, and now, on the day of the latest Wayne gala, it was near-record cold, with storm clouds rolling in across the horizon. 

And while their tuxedos looked nice, they didn’t do much to retain body heat, especially not as the two of them stepped out onto the balcony for a quick reprieve of the party’s fancy guests. 

Their fathers had warned them. They approved of the relationship of course, but Clark didn’t want Jon in the papers, and Bruce didn’t want Damian subjected to any more media attention than his poor children already were, so the rule was strict. No holding hands, no standing too close. No PDA, whatsoever.

So Damian probably didn’t mean anything suggestive, when he sighed grouchily and held his hands out to inspect. Probably meant for Jon to give him his jacket, or go find him a hot plate of food, when he mumbled. “My hands are so cold, will you warm them?”

But flustering Damian was his favorite thing. Right behind breaking their fathers’ stupid rule.

(And this balcony beyond the large floor-to-ceiling windows was private enough.)

As soon as the question was out of his mouth, Jon grabbed Damian’s hands and lifted them to his lips. Warm puffs of air along his skin preceded the gentle kisses to his knuckles. 

Damian watched him in surprise for a second, before an exasperated smirk fell onto his face. “…Beloved.”

And Jon could only grin back, pressing more kisses to Damian’s hands, dragging him ever closer with each peck until he could feel Damian’s breath on his forehead too. “What?”

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satire-please said:                                                                                                                            Damian loves Mulan. All about that honor and protecting your father. Dick likes the Little Mermaid because she was curious and said screw you to dad. Jason likes Cinderella (secretly) or Jasmine cause she takes no one’s crap. Tim likes Belle cause in a way they both tamed a ‘beast.’ Bruce likes Snow white cause she reminds him of his mom. And Alfred likes Mary Poppins because the British always get it done 


/replies to all my disney things because I finally have time

Oh my god, first off: Tim talking to the Belle in Epcot because 1) he loves that it’s her ‘village’ dress with the blue and white. 2) he speaks to her in French 3) ‘I understand, Belle, my boyfriend’s sort of a beast too’ like TIM NO

Jason is in love with every Cinderella face character ever and like, he totally didn’t mean for it to happen. The first time he went to the parks he saw her and just whispered ‘fuck me’ to himself and dragged Damian over to force him to get a picture so talking to her didn’t seem ‘creepy’. His other favorite is Merida, but she’s rarer to see now, but her sassy makes him smile so much.

Damian takes fighting pose pictures with Mulan every single time he goes to Epcot and their trip around the world is planned around her scheduled times so they don’t miss her. He also loves Jasmine and Rapunzel because her dress is gorgeous.

Dick gets upset because they never give Ariel her legs for the face characters 90% of the time and he keeps muttering under his breathe about how she’s robbed and worked hard to get those damned feet she should be WALKING ON THEM.

Bruce literally makes every princess blush, but he really does love Snow White even though she is almost never in anything and has to settle for seeing her in the parades mainly.

Alfred and Mary Poppins literally gossip about having to deal with raising children though she always remarks about how he’s clearly done a good job with them whenever the boys ask so politely for a family picture with her.

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Hey guys, so last summer I wrote, directed, edited, and produced a short film entitled Sunny Days– which is a parody of love stories I’ve seen so many times in terrible movies. It would mean a great lot to me if you would watch this short film and give whatever feedback you find appropriate, and if you‘ve enjoyed the film– share it with your friends.


Also, if you make it halfway through and you don’t like it… Keep watching: It’s only 15 minutes, anything could happen


Plot Synopsis:
After the loss of his brother, Ben feels lost and alone. one day Sunny enters his life and brings vast changes .

Statement:
Sunny Days was shot entirely in the City of Romulus, and has been accepted into seven film festivals so far.

Director’s Notes:
The story of Sunny Days began when I was searching through short films on the internet saw that nearly every romance film had the exact same plot: A man is sad, an eccentric woman enters his life, they have a montage of happiness, and they inevitably break up.
There were so many films with this same story, that I couldn’t help but believe that a satire of one of these stories would be interesting. I love taking a genre we all know and love and trying to do something new with it.

I’m happy with the film, and I am happy above all with the performances. I believe Nick Banko and Miranda Moffat knocked it out of the park with this film, and I cannot wait for people to be able to see what they can do.

Awards:
“Audience Favorite Award” (MovingMedia Film Festival)
“Best Michigan Made Film” (Motor City Nightmares International Film Festival)
“Honorary Award Winner” (International Horror Hotel)
“Official Selection” (Troma Dance Detroit)
“Official Selection” (Royal Starr Film Festival)
“Audience Choice Award” (Film Challenge Detroit)