plastic hat

"Grocery shopping" (Villainous drabbles)


“Grocery shopping” drabbles 2

In the rare occasion Black Hat and company need to travel outside of their home, it’s usually when they need to buy groceries. It is Black Hat’s worse nightmare, shopping like a normal human being.
Black Hat’s eye twitched when Dr. Flug pulled at Dementia’s leash as they went through the sliding doors. Dementia was on all fours, barking at terrified passerbys making Dr. Flug struggle against her. He tug at the leash, his sneakers sliding across the market’s floors.

“Dementia! Heel! Heel! And stop biting the leash!” Dr.Flug yelled out. Dementia spat out the leash and growled at him. “If you keep acting like that, you won’t get any candy!” Dementia’s tune swiftly changed and stood up, her arms hanging from her sides.

“Okay-” She sighed.

Black Hat growled deeply in annoyance when he saw the shoppers exchanged glances at the odd group, murmuring amongst themselves.

“Dr. Flug! I do not wish to be here any longer than I need to be!” Black Hat snapped. “Where is 5.0.5 with the blasted shopping vehicle?”

“You mean the cart, Sir?” Dr.Flug replied softly. Black Hat whirled at him with a glare, causing the good doctor to raise his hands up in defense.

“Don’t try to correct me, Flug!”

“Sorry Sir!”

“Now, let’s hurry and get what we need on the list.” Black Hat said, straightening his collar. He pulled out the folded up piece of paper out of his breast pocket, just in time for 5.0.5 to show up with the shopping cart. Dementia quickly jumped inside with a large grin, making Dr.Flug tie the end of the leash to the handlebars of the cart. Black Hat rolled his eyes at her and tossed the paper into Dr.Flug’s hands.

“I want everything on that list and into this cart in ten minutes.” He said. Dr.Flug opened up the piece of paper and like an accordion, it fell to the floor. Flug’s eyes nearly bulged out of his goggles from the amount.

“T-ten minutes, S-sir?”

“Did I stutter?” Black Hat snarled, making Flug gulp and Dementia giggle. Black Hat pointed at his wrist. “Tick-tick, Flug…better get moving.”

“Y-yes Sir! Come on 5.0.5!” The trio raced off down the aisle, knocking aside any unsuspecting shopper as Dr.Flug scrambled to get the groceries. Black Hat was left alone, standing silently in the produce section with annoying background music playing in the intercoms. He crossed his arms and tapped his foot. He noticed the other shoppers avoiding him, most even avoiding eye contact with the villain. He does have a reputation, which made his chest swell with pride when he saw the fear in their eyes. But, waiting around and doing nothing was quickly became boring. He gritted his teeth and looked at his watch. Dr.Flug has nine minutes and thirty seconds left. Black Hat yanked his arm down and snarled to himself for not giving the cowardly doctor five minutes instead of ten.

“Free sample, Sir?”

His brow raised and turned around, seeing a young woman behind a small table. She was dressed in a white apron, wearing a chest deli hat and holding out a plate of cheese.

“What?” Black Hat said, his sharp teeth showing with disdain.

She held out the plate, giving him a smile. “Free sample? This is our new type of cheese, it’s monterey jack mixed with Munster cheese.”

He stepped forward with his hands behind his back, staring at the plate with suspicion.

“Hmm, what’s the catch?”

“No catch Sir, just cheese.”

He gave her a glance and with a frown, he picked up a piece of cubed cheese by the toothpick and lifted it up to his face. He gave a sniff and put it in his mouth. He chewed it slowly before swallowing it. He shrugged, unimpressed.

“Good.”

She lifted up another plate. “Would you like to try another type?”

He rolled his eyes and gave out a heavy sigh. “If I must.” And he grabbed another piece.
It wasn’t long until he was sitting on one of the spare sitting stools that the employee had behind her counter. Black Hat tossed his fifteenth toothpick into the garbage. He saw Dr, Flug having a bit of trouble with Dementia, who somehow got out of her leash and was now jumping on the shelves in between aisles. Black Hat blinked when he smacked his lips.

“Not bad, what was that one?”

“West Country cheddar.” The employee replied. Black Hat cleaned his sharp teeth with the toothpick before tossing it away.

“I’ll take it.”

“Very good, Sir.” The employee said. She reached behind the counter and pulled out a pound of the cheese, wrapped in a tight plastic. Black Hat grabbed it without giving her a glance. “Would you like the coupon that goes with it? It will save you one dollar.”

“A coupon?” He turned and grabbed the piece of paper. “This thing will help me save money? What kind of idiot designed this? I would rather keep every penny.”

“Which is why it’s limited Sir, only one for each cheese.”

“Hmm, well I suppose I should use it, no sense wasting it. Dr. Flug!” Black Hat yelled out, his voice reaching through the store. “Time’s up!”

He scowled when he saw the doctor pushing the cart with 5.0.5 struggling to keep Dementia inside the cart and attached to the leash. The mountain of food rocked back and forth as they made their way towards Black Hat.
Black Hat took out a small notebook from underneath his top hat, along with a pen. He glanced back at the employee.

“What is your name?”

“Amanda, Sir.”

Black Hat scribbled the name down and shoved the notebook into his hat. “Congratulations, “Amanda”, you have now made the list of humans to show mercy to.”

She tilted her head. “Excuse me?”

Black Hat ignored her when he strolled up to the cart. Dr.Flug was hanging down from the handlebars, breathing heavily as he lifted up a finger.

“W-we got everything, S-Sir Black Hat.”

Dementia shoved a bag of jaw breakers in front of Black Hat’s face. “And I got candy!”

Black Hat immediately shoved the bag back into Dementia’s face. “Cut it out! Now! Let’s go!” Black Hat began to walk towards the door, but Dr, Flug stopped him when he asked.

“What about paying for the groceries?”

Black Hat’s neck snapped when he turned his head completely around like an owl. He gave the trip a devilish grin. “Who said anything about paying?”

No one really stopped them.

———————————————
I hoped you all enjoyed!

Tiny Until Dawn headcanon
  • Mike is ambidextrous.
  • Sam was born with hearing issues (which only became worse after handigo screamed in her ear and the explosion, and she needed to get surgery to fix her hearing. Mike, who also started experiencing hearing issues after being around so many explosions and gunshots, learned sign langue to communicate with Sam till she had her surgery)
  • Chris and Matt are both double jointed, but Chris more so than Matt
  • Jess memorized the alphabet backwards due to how many times she’s been pulled over from a DUI or was in the car with someone who got pulled over
  • Emily knows the capital of every state and almost every European country.
  • Ashley and Emily are “band buddies”. Ashley plays the flute, Emily plays the piano and violin.
  • Jess is secretly jealous that Ashley has such nice hair (and she doesn’t even have to dye it) and is not so secretly pissed off that she is always covering it with a hat.
  • Matt and Mike constantly have petty “who’s stronger” contests (especially when they’re drunk) such as: arm wresting contests, push up contest, pull up contests.
  • One party, they had a race to the end of the block and back, and Josh, being much drunker than both of them, decided to join in. He ended up falling in a bush and then puking on himself. (Matt won)
  • Chris had nerf guns as a kid. But not the regular nerf gun kid, like the one who has a special closest for all his guns and a basket of nerf darts that he keep fully stocked, just in case.
  • Sam’s mom was a first generation Polish American, so she taught Sam polish when she was little and she’s still half fluent in it.
  • Emily is a first generation Japanese American, so she is fluent in not only Japanese, but Spanish, and French.
  • Jess is secretly a really good artist. She never had any lessons or anything, she’s just always been doodling in class rather than paying attention (she does it for therapy after the incident)
  • Matt wanted to be a doctor as a kid, but his dreams were crushed after he began struggling in school and decided her wasn’t “smart enough” to be one.
  • Ironically, Mike wanted to be a professional football player as a kid, but his Senator father crushed his dreams and made him drop out of the sport just before high school.
  • Josh was a master at magic tricks as a kid and had a plastic wand, cape, hat, and everything. He used to put on shows for Hannah and Beth. (Hannah loved them. Beth thought they were boring because she knew how he did the tricks.)
  • Chris on more than one occasion played his “lovely assistant”, and even wore a dress one time. (He has since burned all the photo evidence of it after the Washington’s embarrassed or blackmailed him with it one too many times)
  • Sam and Beth used to go to the gym together and were hiking partners. Hannah once tried to go to the gym with them and ended up nearly fainting from exhaustion.
  • Emily and Jess always throw each other surprise birthday parties, but it quickly turned completive as they always tried to out do each other. Jess always threw the better party, and so on year Emily threw Jess’s a month in advance, just to win by having the biggest surprise.
  • Ashley has three cats and she loves them all. She’s always covered with cat hair and Emily and Jess bring lint brushes every time they visit her house. 

Army Soldier!Yoongi
Words: 15.2K
Warning: None at all
A/N:
I wrote a short series that will be updated whenever I want to include a filler, hope you guys enjoy! 
Part 1 of TBD

Originally posted by cyyphr

My six-year-old son was obsessed with army toys and everything soldier related. I didn’t think anything of it when he began telling me he wanted to join the army when he was older and I nodded, telling him that he could do anything he wanted to do as long as he knew it would make him happy. I thought all of this was a phase until I went in to pick him up from school, realizing that next week was Veterans Day when the kids waited to be picked, wearing plastic army hats.

“Mommy! We wrote a letter to the soldiers and they are going to mail it out! I’m so excited! I get to talk with a real soldier!” Jake excitedly yelled, running at me and I picked him up, hugging him.

“That’s great, honey.” I grinned, the teacher walking over and I set Jake down, letting him go with his friend, the two playing for a bit.

“As a treat for Veteran’s Day, we’re sending cards out thanking them and giving them presents. Jake drew a picture of you two and wrote on the back about your job and how you always play with him.” I smile and blushed a bit, looking at my son.

The days leading up to the arrival of the Veteran that was going to visit the school made Jake more and more anxious. All he talked about was how he was going to join the army and protect me and everyone. I watched and played with him, pretending to die when he “shot” me, jumping in joy before climbing on me and hugging me.

When the day finally arrived, I walked Jake to school, a few army trucks were parked in the school’s parking lot and Jake jumped up and down, pointing at them and shaking my hand. “Mommy! Look! They’re here!” I grinned and nodded, walking Jake to his classroom to find all the kids sitting and two men in camouflage uniforms, one of them looking at us and smiling.

Jake froze, looking at them with astonishment. “I thought you were excited?” I laughed, crouching down and being eye level with him. Jake looked at me and pressed himself closer, growing nervous. I smiled a bit, hugging him, about to comfort him when the one who smiled at us walked over, crouching next to me.

“Hey, buddy, what’s your name?” He asked, Jake, looking at him before looking up at me. I smiled and nodded, assuring him that it was alright.

“I’m Jacob…” He whispered, the man grinning and I looked over, smiling at his grin.

“My name is Min Yoongi, and if I’m not mistaken, I seemed to have gotten your letter,” Jake and I watched as he took out a folded envelope from his pocket, taking out the card Jake drew and showing it to him. I looked at Jake, seeing him grin and stand up straight, walking from my side and in front of Yoongi.

“Wow! Did you like it?” I smiled and watched as Jake clapped his small hands, stars in his eyes as Yoongi laughed and nodded.

“I keep it in my pocket for good luck, so you can be with me in my missions.” Jake grinned, looking at me and grabbing my hand.

“Mommy, did you hear that? He keeps it with him like if I went on missions too!” I laughed a bit, nodded and kissed his cheek.

“Yes I heard, now you go and sit with the rest of your friends. I’ll be back to pick you up when you’re done, okay?” Jake nodded and waved at me, running to his friend and sitting with him, the two grinning and talking.

I stood up, Yoongi standing up and offered his hand. “Major Min Yoongi, it’s a pleasure to meet the mother of the young man who sent such wonderful words.” I smiled and accepted his hand, shaking it lightly.

“Y/N, it’s a pleasure to meet you too, Major.”

Yoongi’s smile grew a bit and he turned to the teacher as she clapped her hands, gathering everyone’s attention.

“I should leave you to it then,” I pulled my hand back, fixing my purse on my elbow. Yoongi turned back to me and nodded, heading back to the front of the class while I walked out, passing a few parents and kids.

I looked at the clock at home, sitting on the kitchen table and sighed, looking back down at my computer and continuing to type, finally shutting it and pulling on my jacket, a few dollars, and my keys. I walked out, locking the door behind me and walked to the school, seeing a few other parents going to pick up their kids. I head over to the classroom, smiling at a few parents as they walk out with their child, seeing mine talking to Yoongi. I leaned on the wall, the teacher walking over and looking at the two.

“Those two have been inseparable since the start of class. Major Yoongi has been sitting next to him and playing all day with him.” I grinned and thanked the teacher walking over and catching the eye of Jake.

“Hi, mommy!” He ran over, and I bent down, picking him up and hugging him.

“Hey, how was your day?” I asked. Jake pulling back and waving Yoongi over.

“Major and I played all day and made projects and it was so fun and can he come over for lunch mommy please?” I laughed and shook my head.

“Oh baby, Major Yoongi probably has plans after this-”

“Actually,” Both my son and I looked up at him, seeing him smile a bit at us. “I don’t have plans until tomorrow, I would be more than happy to join you two for lunch.” I looked at Jake who gave me puppy dog eyes and I laughed, nodding.

“Alright, then, he can come over for lunch.” Jake grinned at me and eagerly grabbing Yoongi’s hand.

“Come on! You can walk with us!” Yoongi laughed and stood his ground.

“Whoa there, I still need to get my things and thank the teacher. I’ll meet you two in about an hour, okay?” Jake nodded and grinned.

“I’ll be sitting in front of my house so you know which it is, okay?” Before Yoongi can answer, Jake ran out of the class to his friend, waving goodbye.

“Here,” I looked around the class and didn’t see the teacher, taking a post-it and a pen, writing my address and handing it to him. “I’m sure Jake will wait for you until you get there,” I laugh a bit, Yoongi smiling and nodding.

“Alright, I’ll see you two there,” I smiled and nodded, walking out and meeting Jake outside the class, holding his hand as we walked home. He gushed about his whole day, talking about how he and Yoongi colored, played pretend and how he even told him a few military secrets that he swore he wouldn’t tell anyone, not even me.

Once home, he ran inside and opened the fridge, taking out a juice box and his pear slices, running back outside and to the porch, sitting in the chair and waiting. I took care of him from my spot in the kitchen, racking my brain for a quick meal before deciding on a quick chicken recipe, quickly slicing the vegetables and adding the seasonings as the oven heated up, placing the chicken in and sighing, looking at the mess I needed to clean.

“Mommy! Major Yoongi is here! Come inside!” I wiped my hands, walking to the hall that led to the living room, Yoongi smiling down at Jake and following him in, smiling at me.

“Hello again,” I returned the smile, Jake leading him to the table.

“I help with putting the cups!” Jake pointed to the shelf above him, Yoongi reaching up and handing him a small plastic cup while he took two glass ones, setting them on the table.

“Mommy, can I go show Major my room?” Jake asked, running over to me and softly patting my arm

“Yeah, go ahead,” I nodded looking down and he grinned, grabbing Yoongi’s hand and taking him to his room, giving me the opportunity to clean my mess up.

“This is where I keep my toy soldiers! Mom just bought me this new one! And look, this is a picture of my dog, and my mom and dad!”

I stopped washing dishes, the pan slipping from my hands and crashing down, making me yelp in surprise.

“You okay?” I turned my head, not sure how the black haired man rushed over so quick, but there he stood next to me, his eyes looking at me with concern and worry.

“I’m fine, I just dropped the pan, I’m fine, really,” I picked the pan up again, rinsing it off, Yoongi still by my side.

“He’s playing with his toys… Is there something that startled you?” Yoongi asked.

I gulped and focused on the pan, the beeping of the oven making me flinch a bit and I turned to it, turning it off and took out the chicken carefully setting it on the stove top. I turned the other way, going to see Jake looking for something, seeing the picture of his parents on the floor.

“Food’s ready,” Jake looked at me and grinned, rushing out and to the kitchen.

“Major Yoongi, sit with me!” I heard Jake say, Yoongi agreeing and saying he would after helping me. I placed a few vegetables on Yoongi’s plate, adding slices of the chicken and doing the same to Jake’s.

“I don’t like carrots,” Jake mumbled, pushing them aside.

“Remember, they help improve eyesight,” I smiled, setting my plate down and thanking Yoongi for the cup of lemonade he set in front of me.

“But I don’t even wear glasses, mommy,” He grumbled.

“But,” I looked up at Yoongi who took a carrot on his fork and showed it to Jake. “Carrots help in the long run. When you grow up and you want to join the army, the carrots will help you have stronger eyesight,” Yoongi ate the carrot, smiling as he chewed it and my son grinned, stuffing his in his mouth and chewing them.

“One at a time,” I smile, reaching over and lower his hand as he had three more slices on the fork.

The three of us ate, Yoongi explaining his job and what he mostly did back at base. He told us about his family, his older brother and how he was to serve in the Korean army as well but because he’s serving here, they’ll give him the exception. Jake listened throughout the beginning, but I watched as his bites were smaller and he took longer to chew his food, his eyes droopy.

“Long day?” I asked. Jake looking at me and opening his eyes more, setting his fork down and rubbing his eyes as he nodded.

“Can I take a nap, mommy?” I excused myself, Yoongi nodded and I got up, Jake saying goodnight to Yoongi and we walked to his room.

“Go to bed and I’ll quickly clean, deal?” I asked, Jake nodding and climbed to his bed, crawling under the blankets as I quickly picked up his toys, grabbing the photo frame and setting it on his desk where he kept it. I walked over to Jake and pet his hair down, kissing his cheek and he smiled, falling asleep.

I walked back to the kitchen, Yoongi sitting patiently and smiled as I came back. He picked up his fork again, continuing to eat. “Your son is quite the child,” He laughed a bit, making me nod.

“Yes, and with quite the imagination,” Yoongi laughed and agreed, taking another bite of the chicken.

“Can I ask you something, if you don’t mind at least? Keep in mind that you don’t have to answer me.”

I looked at Yoongi, seeing him push around his potato before picking it up and eating it. “Of course, what is it?”

Yoongi took his time chewing and swallowing, looking at his plate before back at me. “The picture of the man, was that your husband or boyfriend?” He asked.

I stared at him, looking down and smiling a bit, shaking my head. “No, he wasn’t anything to me,” I picked at my chicken with my fork, staring at it. “He wasn’t even my friend, he was my twin sister’s boyfriend and current husband,”

Yoongi stayed quiet, looking at me before I looked at him and smiled a bit. “I’m sorry, this isn’t a conversation I’d like to have with someone I just met, I hope you understand.”

Yoongi blinked and nodded. “Of course I understand. You have no right to tell me about your personal life. Honestly I was just curious but if you don’t want to tell me, I won’t ask and I won’t pester you or Jake about it,”

I smile at Yoongi and nodded, the two of us finishing our food in a comfortable silence, Yoongi then clearing his throat and asking about my job and hobbies and other things. We eventually moved our plates aside, the two of us talking about our younger days and laughing with each other before Jake woke up and walked out of his room, joining us.

“Good morning buddy, have a good nap?” Yoongi asked. Jake grinning and nodded.

“Come on Major, let’s go play!” Jake eagerly rushed back into his room, and I smiled, picking up the plates.

“You go and enjoy yourself, I’ll clean up here,” I smiled, Yoongi nodding and heading to Jake.

I wrapped the rest of the chicken away, washing the dishes and cleaning the table before walking to Jake’s room and seeing Yoongi looking at the dinosaurs as Jake made the army men ride them into war.

“I think if we had dinosaurs, we would have the most advantage,” Yoongi looked up at me and showed me one. I laughed and nodded, Yoongi looking at his watch and sighing. “Sorry, Jake, looks like I have to go.” Jake looked up and pouted.

“Do you really?” He asked. Yoongi nodded and opened his arms, Jake crashing into him and hugging him tightly.

“I’ll keep in touch with your mom and when I can, we’ll talk on the phone, okay?” Jake nodded and wiped his tears away, pulling back. Yoongi stood up and took Jake’s hand, the two walking past me and I followed them to the front door.

Jake opened the front door and we walked to the patio, Jake letting go of Yoongi’s hand, standing next to me, hugging my hand.

“Thank you for inviting me. I haven’t had this much fun in a long time,” Yoongi smiled, looking at Jake then at me.

“You can come back, right?” Jake asked. Yoongi crouched down and smiled, nodding.

“I’ll try very hard to come back,” Jake smiled and nodded, looking up at me.

“Why don’t you go watch TV for a bit while I see Major Yoongi off,” Jake nodded and waved one last time, rushing in and turning on the TV in the living room.

“Thank you for coming over, Yoongi,” I smiled, Yoongi returned it, shaking his head.

“Thank you for having me, I’ll be sure to keep in touch,” Yoongi pulled out his cell-phone, unlocking it and handing it to me. “If you don’t mind putting in your number, I did promise someone I would call and talk with him,”

I smiled and nodded, putting my number and name in, saving it and handing it back. “I can’t promise you I’ll be back, you never really know when you’ll come back in one piece, but I promise that I’ll call whenever I can.”

I nodded and took a deep breath, knowing this was the life he chooses to do, risks and all. I saw him walk to me and gently lift his hands to my neck, holding the back of it and gently leaning forward, his lips landing on mine in a soft kiss.

My eyes closed and my hands moved to his sides, holding on tightly to the material of his jacket, pulling him closer to me. He took another step forward, his chest pressed to mine and he smiled against my lips, making me smile before he pulled back a little, looking down at me and gently pushing my hair behind my ear.

“Like I said, I can’t promise I’ll come back in one piece, so in case I don’t, I did what I wanted to do,” I looked up at him and smiled, nodding. Yoongi gave me one last kiss, walking back and walking down the porch steps, looking back and smiling, walking away. I walked back inside, closing the door and leaning on it.

“Mommy… is Major Yoongi ever going to come back?” I looked over at Jake and smiled.

“We can hope he comes back healthy and safe,” I answered, seeing him, looking down at him hands, playing with them.

“He doesn’t lie to us like mom and dad do… does he?” Jake looked up at me, his eyes watery. I walked over, pulling him on my lap and hugging him tightly. His soft sniffs and cries muffled into my shirt.

“He won’t lie, baby, not like them,” I whispered, clenching my eyes closed and holding my tears back.

Cheap (kinda) Mascot Head (thing idk)

Time for another missing pictures build \o/ so uhhh… I had another prop I made, (specifically a lantern) that I have basically zero pictures of building, but! I took quite a few pictures of this:

my Tonberry head. Total approximate cost: $15 give or take $3-5 of materials I already had on hand. Disclaimer: the total cost is low because I have a tiny head.

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Avengers Alcohol headcanons

Cap: Samuel adams, like he wont drink bad beer but he’s not going to drink pretentious craft beer either, he finds that reasonably priced medium. The guy in the bar who feels like he can instruct the bartender on what channel should be playing on the TV and how loud it should be. After four beers he starts to point a lot.

Tony: He crosses the broad spectrum of alcohol, like from toasting everyone with Dom Perignon 2008 Vintage champagne to ‘ay who wants to watch me down this bud light lime out of caps helmut’ just 100- 0 real quick

Natasha: no its not stoli or russian standard, not all her vodka is russian you stereotyping fuks, but hey, you want some i have some out back its 89% and was brewed in a soviet war bunker by a guy named ivan, it’ll burn a hole in your tongue, your oesophagus and your soul, here i’ll pour you a shot

Bruce: Doesn’t know anything about wine but if he just asks for ‘the house wine’ at restaurants he knows he’s gonna sound like he’s ‘with it’ 

Falcon: classy belvedere vodka done in shots from the tackiest plastic shot glass he got free from a sale bottle of Sierra Nevada. Is in charge of the jukebox/ipod dock/aux cord and no one appreciates that but they should

Thor: MEAD and ALE served in TANKARDS by WENCHES and… you know… I guess Heineken or whatevers on tap is fine too…. I mean it’s not served in an ivory and gold drinking horn but….ok

Rhodey: Sierra Nevada or Blue Moon, beer for the man who knows what the term ‘hops’ actually means. He is the designated driver and knows his limits, he’s defintely only going to have one and then he’s going to make sure Tony isn’t going to steal thor’s cape and try and use the infinity gauntlet as a substitute drinking horn, he is going to be responsible. An hour passes. He is up on a table with tony, both wrapped in the cape, using caps helmet as the substitute drinking horn as they both scull bud light lime while singing sweet caroline

Bucky: Doing shots with natasha

T’challa:

Fine five star cognac aged in oaken barrels in some rich provincial french town shipped to his estate exclusively and served to him by a beautiful lady in a crystal glass carried on a polished vibranium tray as he sits in a plush leather chair overlooking his land

Clint: It’s always tequila, and every time he puts the little plastic sombrero hat on his head and thinks he’s really funny. That or he’s the guy that drunkenly pressures people to eat the tequila worm for an hour and then when no one wants to he does it himself and fifteen minutes later he’s vomiting behind someones car in the driveway

Wanda: did a shot of 89% soviet vodka and is regretting her decisions

Vision: Requires no alcohol as it serves no apparent function. Is enquiring to the whereabouts of a bucket so that he might assist wanda

Spider-man: tony stark let him have a sip of his bud light lime if he promised not to tell cap and it was so rad but oh my god that was so nasty but he cant say that because like its probably fancy millionaire beer, this is the coolest thing that’s ever happened to him, he can’t believe he was even invited to this party.

Ant-man: was not invited to this party

Still playing with the Taako design. Changed the cloak to the menta ray, added his iron on patch to the hat, the plastic police badge and actually added his sword (which he never use??)

Still playing with the umbastaff design - which I have no intention of matching nicely with Taako. Ever.
It’s just…the thought of him waving around this mighty powerful thing that looks like he’s holding on to it for an old lady (and mismatch with everything he wears) makes me very happy.

anonymous asked:

i will yell at you even though both our doors are closed to shut up your class jesus christ au cause imagine Clarke getting pissy like that

The Sacking of Iona

Thank you for this prompt, I had a lot of fun with it!  This is vaguely based on one of the greatest days of my middle school career.

It was sixth period, aka Clarke’s last class and she was exhausted, as she always was by this point in the day.  Teaching biology to high schoolers who just wanted to stab each other with dissection tools and makes jokes about frog intestines was exhausting.

She was bringing up her slideshow about binary fission and asexual reproduction when she heard it.

The noise from across the hall.  From his classroom.  The noise that had been tormenting her all day.

Clarke took a deep breath to calm herself.  There were forty-five minutes left of this period and then school was finished.  She’d been dealing with it all day and she could do it for another forty-five minutes.  It was forty-five minutes.  That was nothing.  Right?

Right.

“Okay, guys,” she said, “does anyone know how bacteria reproduce?”

There was a particularly loud cheer from across the hall.

Clarke ground her teeth together and, ignoring the five raised hands from her class, crossed the front of the room to her closed door and looked out across the deserted hallway into Room 1215.  His room.

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Here I am :) Dungeon Master of a game of 5th edition D&D. 

My hand writing is pretty terrible so just In case you can’t read what’s on the image:

My name is Hannah, I’m 20 years old and I am an INFJ.

My likes include: cats, soft things, dice, cartoons, tormenting my players, sweets, pasta, cuddles and music.

My dislikes include: being picked on, loud noises, horror films, crowds, giving presentations and being interrupted.

In my bag you’re likely to find: my phone, a pencil case with mechanical pencils, a spare phone battery, a small lemonade, a plastic bag, my warm hat and a packet of mints. 

It is lovely to make your acquaintance ^-^ 

5

My shelves post-TGIFF

My Korrasami shelf is now a shelf and a half. lol pic 1 has art from @samanthadoodles @lauraknatt and @plastic-pipes , the atla comics, and books 3 and 4 of the lok art books, my Korra statues, and my clexacon bracelet.

pic 2- Batgirl x2, Supergirl, Agent Carter, and Harley/Ivy Pops

pic 3- three Princess/General Leias (and I thought that SW basket had my missing Pop, but I was wrong. I had that one already), three Wonder Woman Pops, Moana mini-pop, and some assorted Wondy gear

pic 4- that gay shit, @lambocalypse Lexa with pride flag, Hermione, McGonagall, Captain Marvel, and Lara Croft in front of all my fandom/fanfic research books

pic 5 is my mostly new shelf- more @plastic-pipes , my Wanheda hat, some stickers I picked up this weekend (and I think my daughter picked up my chibi Korra sticker :/) my TGIFF badge (and assorted pins- bi and ace flags, gal pal, wondy, supergirl, etc.) and some Sanvers swag I won in the auction plus my Sara Ryder Pop. Top left is the icebreaker mini-KA fic Piglet wrote for me.

flickr

ヒデキ por Sebastián Vargas [cosmicolor]
Por Flickr:
Hideki, my new mini people :D!!! I glued goat hair on him, is really soft and easy to comb.

sterek au: fireman!derek and waiter!stiles

happy birthday to my dear friend, attoliancrown. just some fluff to make you smile on your birthday! <3 love you!!!

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Stiles watches the diner boredly from behind the counter while Lydia reties her apron for the four hundredth time in an attempt to achieve the perfect bow and Allison refills sugar containers. He’s waiting for table 12’s order from Scott and Isaac, and from their laughs floating in from the kitchen, that’s not going to happen soon.

His eyes cut over to the door when the bell jingles, and two ridiculously attractive men walk in. “Mine!” Stiles nearly yells, rushing around the counter before Lydia even has time to look up from her crooked bow.

“Hey, no fair! It’s my turn!” she hisses, and Stiles feels no remorse at all when he stops in front of the table, out of breath and red-faced. The two guys look up at him, and even with the one look of confused amusement and the other of pure disdain, it is so worth it. God, Grumpy Beard is the hottest thing to ever enter this diner. Or maybe enter planet Earth. And, oh god, he’s wearing a fitted black button up uniform shirt like his companion. A fireman. Stiles tries not to pop a boner right there.

“Hey, welcome to Wolf Road Diner. I’m Stiles, I’ll be taking care of all of your needs, well, food wise, I mean, um…would you like anything to drink?” Stiles flicks his pen nervously against his pad, his face burning with embarrassment. Grumpy Beard’s friend, who is only slightly less attractive, gives him a creepy closed-lipped smile. Grumpy Beard looks like he wants to murder Stiles in his sleep.

“Two waters, and two burger plates,” he says, and wow, that voice is not what Stiles expected. It’s almost…soft. As Stiles nods and takes the scribbled order to the window, he briefly imagines what it’d sound like in his ear, with the fireman’s long hot

“You ass!” Lydia slaps his arm, hard. “That was my table, and you know it!”

“Lydia, I…I had to. Did you see the dark-haired one? He’s like every wet dream I’ve ever had come to life. After this, I’ll have spank bank material for at least two months.”

Lydia wrinkles her nose. “Ew, Stiles, really? You’re disgusting. I don’t know why I talk to you.”

“You love me, shut up.”

Stiles manages to not embarrass himself in front of Grumpy Beard and Hot Friend, and he learns that Vernon Milton Boyd IV is the friend, and Grumpy Beard is a caveman who is afraid of debit cards. But he leaves Stiles a four dollar tip on an eight dollar meal, so Grumpy can stay in the stone age for all Stiles cares. Plus, stone age means no shirt, score.

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Keep reading

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Antonius Bui
Ao Dai
Bamboo hat, plastic string from Nam Hai
65″ x 15″ x 15″
NFS

Tea ceremonies are almost exclusively associated with weddings in Vietnamese culture. Serving tea to the parents of the bride and groom is a tradition, which is followed by worlds of wisdom from each recipient. 

Identifying as a 1st generation Vietnamese American who is also queer, such rituals have always seemed remote to me, even inaccessible at times. Constantly treading the water between my Vietnamese and American identity has led to the development of objects which belong to the realm of Vietfuturism. This costume embodies the transformative and healing abilities I associate with tea. It is inspired by the Ao Dai, a traditional Vietnamese garment, and allows the wearer to mask their identity beneath the bamboo hat. Every moment activates the free hanging strings, mirroring the act of steeping tea, allowing the wearer to fall into a deeper trance.