plasma grenades


“Is recorder on?”

“Yeah it’s on.”



“Live feed or..?”

“Nah it’s just recording. We’ll edit this out later.”


“Probably not.”

“Fine, let’s just get started then.”

“Please state your name for the record.”

“My name is Professor Mohammad bin Hukukk”

“What is your profession?”

“I am a professor of Xeno Culture at New Harvard University.”

“Was this your profession during the Texar-Hakara war?”

“No, no my profession was a Orbital Drop Trooper, Sergeant, First Terran Marines.”

“Can you give us an explanation of what your job entailed?”

“We drop in, we fight our way out.”

“You took part in the fighting?”


“During the assault on Rygel Nine, were you with the Marines?”

“Yes, yes I was.”

“Can you describe it for me?”

“Long. Muddly. Bloody.”

“Come on Professor Hukukk, you can do better.”

“You’re making a documentary?”

“Actually we’re making a movie. We want it to be as close to reality as possible. From what we’ve heard even the folks back at Galactic Studios won’t need to embellish much.”

“How much sway do you have with the studio?”

“I’m a Senior Producer.”

“That didn’t answer my question.”

annoyed sigh from off camera

“I have a lot of influence. I’m pretty much in charge of this production.”

“Then I want your personal assurance that the names and places I tell you won’t be changed. These men deserve that, and much more besides.”

“You have my word.”

“I want a copy of this transcript immediately after the interview.”

“Fine. Can we please move on to what I came here for?”

“Alright, ask away.”

“Professor, tell me about the lead up to, and the battle at, Rygel Nine.”

“As I said I was with the First Marines. Specifically with Third Company, Second Battalion.”

“The infamous Riley’s Rangers.”

“The very same. Our CO was Captain Hank Riley. Tough old bastard, like a father to every man in that Company. Underneath him were the three Lieutenants. Jacobs, Stern, and Gibbs. Gibbs was a First Lieutenant, second in command of the Company. I was transferred to them two weeks before drop. Just enough time to learn the names of the Captain and Lieutenants, get used to my unit, then suddenly we’re in orbit over Rygel Nine. Texar-Hakara world. The first of their original worlds we were invading. Earth was… she gone by that point. Burned by the bugs. Some of the men talked quietly about what their plans were for when they went home. Most considered that bad luck.

"I was sitting with my squad when Captain Riley gave us his speech. Hold on I brought a recording of it…”

a new voice enters the conversation, only the slightest hiss of static mars the audio file

“Men, today we’re dropping into enemy territory, real enemy territory. It’s fortified and they’re waiting for us. We have never dropped onto a world like this before. All Texar-Hakara are to be considered armed and dangerous until the local hive mind is taken out. That’s our job. We’re Riley’s Rangers for a reason. We drop into the meanest parts of enemy territory to do the most damage. That’s what we’re doing today. Stick together, work with your squad. You’ll come out of this just fine.”

the voice stops, as does the faint static

“When Marine Shock Troops drop into enemy held territory the CO sometimes plays some heavy metal or hard rock or something to get the men pumped up. It works too, wipes away some of the fear. Just enough so that the men can still function as they strap themselves into what is essentially a big bullet, that’s going to be fired out of an under powered railgun directly at the planet’s surface. Captain Riley always played Hard Corps . Old song, but damn good. The Captain came on, told us he’d see us on the other side.

"The Captain never made it down. Anti-air took out the command pod on the way down. Captain Riley and Lieutenants Jacobs and Stern were wiped. Never even heard a peep. Thankfully SOP said Gibbs had to be in a different pod, and he was.

"Lieutenant Gibbs took command. Good man, solid. Exactly the right guy to replace the Captain in combat. He got us up, armed, and organized, and he did it fast. My squad was on the far left flank with the rest of First Platoon. Our job was to hold the line and secure an exit line for Second Platoon, who would be handling the assault on the hive mind.”

“Is this where things started to go wrong?”

“Things started to go wrong when the goddamn brass decided that they wanted to drop us in the wrong place, at the wrong time, in the middle of a goddamn Texar-Hakara staging ground.”


“Damn straight. The first we realize that we’re in the middle of another grand cockup is when Third Platoon got hit by fifty Texar-Hakara warrior drones. They took sixty percent casualties in an hour. We were told to reinforce them and dig in while First Platoon scouted the area. First platoon got jumped two hundred meters out, every last one of them dead, including Lieutenant Gibbs. Now I’m in command of what we can only reasonably call ourselves an over-strength platoon. And we’re smack in the middle of a staging ground for the Third Hakaran Army.

"We radioed for support, and of course the nearest supporting elements were five klicks away. Through the largest concentration of Texar-Hakara on the continent. And we didn’t even have a direct line to them, because we were supposed to be linking up with another force twenty klicks to the north, and our communications were only keyed to Orbital Command and transmit a confirmatory ping to other Terran forces. Originally it was intended to keep us beneath the radar, so to speak. To allow us to get close to the hive mind without giving away our position. Instead what it did was effectively cut us off from the rest of the Army. Orbital was too busy to relay our messages for us.

"I was working with our tech guy, Corporal Swanson, to bypass the block on the radio when the first wave hit us. We knew the Texar-Hakara were out there, and we’d dug in feverishly. We weren’t equipped to hold the line against hundreds of enemies, but each soldier had been issued the standard anti-tunneling package. Slam a spike into the bottom of a foxhole, and the SATUFP, Strategic Anti-Tunneling Unit for Fixed Positions, shoots out thousands of nanomite cables throughout the ground, sets them firmly in place, connects them, and runs a million volt current through them. Try and tunnel into the foxhole, and you get an ugly zap. It had forced the bugs to engage us on the surface, and we set up a few some meters in front of our position. It was a good way of encouraging the bastards to come up in front of us.

"And holy mother of god did they come up in front of us. Hundreds of them came charging out of the forest, no warning, no sound except the clicking of their legs and their blasts of plasma. We had entrenched defenses, some light plasma machineguns, and the rest of us had laser carbines, plasma grenades, the usual outfit. It was a brutal fight, they kept coming even when they should have been dead. We mowed them down by the dozen, and they swarmed over the bodies of their dead. We started to take casualties as they got closer. Their accuracy was shit, but the hive mind keeps them on task, and their sheer weight of numbers often carries the day.

"It got to hand to hand at one point. They were just coming faster than we could shoot them. Vibroblades and Power Armor versus rock hard chitin and mandibles. Four Privates were MIA after that, just too ripped up to be positively IDed or POWs, the bugs were still taking prisoners at this point. Power Armor can stop a lot, plasma, lasers, bullets. Knives just bounce off. But bug mandibles have crushing force the likes of which our suits just can’t handle. I was hunkered down with Private Tulman and Corporal Swanson. We’re pouring fire into the bugs. Tulman’s Plasma MG is really what kept them off us. Then they swarmed over their corpses, and on top of us. Swanson got ripped apart. Three of them grabbed on and pulled. He was screaming and swearing and shooting to the last, but he died bloody. Tulman lit those three up the second Swanson’s vitals went flat. One of them jumped on me. These things are ugly up close. They look like short ants. Two main body pods instead of three, six big legs, six beady eyes, spikes everywhere, a plasma rifle attached to the underside of the head. I stabbed into the eyes with my combat knife. Despite what some idiot writers will tell you, a nanometer edge on your blade just makes it that much easier to break. It doesn’t matter if it can slide through titanium, in combat you’re not cutting titanium, you’re fighting a living being that is going to be moving, and when your edge breaks off, you’re dead.

"I was a Sergeant. I had a responsibility to be better than my men. Cleaner, smarter, tougher, meaner, and everything in between. Part of that is having your gear perfectly stashed and equipped. So when I say my knife had a perfect edge on it, not too thin not too dull, I’m not kidding. I stabbed straight through that bug’s eye and into its bug brain. And that bastard kept coming. So I shoved my plasma pistol up against it’s torn up eye and pumped six shots into the brain. It collapsed halfway through cutting my arm off. The connectors to my left arm were shot. My helmet’s HUD was flickering in and out and the faceplate was cracked. I was bleeding, not a lot but a little. And the bug had shredded my injury suppressants, so it hurt like hell.

"Most of my men weren’t much better. We couldn’t take another wave like that, but moving was damn risky. The way I saw it, the bugs knew we were here. It was only a matter of time until another force came by to wipe my three quarter strength company off the face of the universe. So we had two options. Stay and die, or leave and die when we ran into a bigger bug patrol. The men made their voices clear. They were prepared to die. And the way they saw it, they had a better chance of killing more bugs here than they did moving around. So we hunkered down. We piled up bug corpses to use as sandbags. We stripped the bodies of our comrades for parts and ammo. We envied the bastards actually.”

“I’m sorry?”

“We envied them. By this point in the war-”

“Revival tech.”

“We traded the Yungling for it. Standard issue on every fleet ship. Upload your neural patterns, and when your body died you got a new one, right off the printer. Commercializing DNA sequencing, one thing the twenty first century did right. As soon as those bastards were confirmed KIA, they were regrown. A hour later they were safe and sound back up on the ship. Dying isn’t fun, I’ll tell you that. But there’s a certain peace that comes from knowing it isn’t final. More likely to throw yourself on a grenade and save your squad. More likely to hold the line against impossible odds, or volunteer for a suicide mission. Best thing to ever happen to the human war machine.

"We hunker down, shore up our defenses, and we kill another group of bugs that wanders by. Fifty odd insects in that one, all dead. Along with fourteen men. Quarter strength now, about fourteen of us total. We keep doing the same thing. Kill a few bugs, a few of us buy a ticket back up to the ship. It gets to the point where it’s just me and Tulman left, out of an entire company. But we’re surrounded by bug corpses. Must have been two hundred at least.”

“Four hundred thirty.”

“I’m sorry?”

“Official after action report says at this point it is estimated your Company had killed four hundred and thirty bugs.”

“Never read it.”

“It was declassified sixty years ago, when revival tech went public.”

“Wasn’t interested in reading it. Dying isn’t fun, and remembering death… it changes you.”

“I’m sorry, please continue.”

“Next wave is about a hundred of the six legged freaks. They come at us like bats out of hell. Tulman dies quick, plasma to the face. I’m left manning the plasma MG with one hand. It clicks dry, no more charge. I can’t change the ammo by myself. It’s made to be completely operable by one man, but one man with two working hands. I charge up four plasma grenades, prime them, slap them onto two ammo boxes for the plasma MG, and run full tilt at the bugs. I jump on top of one, and the box blows. Plasma everywhere, burning the hell out of everything and everyone. That’s when I died.

"I wake up on the UHS Washington DC. She was named after the battle in the old earth capitol, back when she represented the United… Statues I think it was.”

“United States.”

“That makes more sense. Anyways, that was my part in the Battle of Rygel Nine.”

“Nothing else?”


“Nothing about the awards you received?”

“They were after the fact.”

“You received the Medal of Honor for recording the deaths of over twenty men. Without that they might not have been confirmed KIA, and never revived.”

“I did what any man there would have done for me.”

“Thank you Professor, that’s all I have.”

“Don’t forget these names, those men that were torn to shreds by the Texar-Hakara, the ones that were MIA? If you can’t be confirmed as KIA we can’t revive you, having two of the exact same person in the universe, the exact same memories, the exact same fingerprints and DNA. Same loved ones, same bank accounts. What do you tell the one that turns out to have been a POW for ten years. Sorry, there’s another one of you that’s been with your family the entire time? No, no we can’t do that. They were permed.”


“Permanently killed. Permadeath. Never revived. Privates Rodger P. Ackleman, Reginald Puller, George H. Killroy, and Yassah B. Hukukk.”

“Any relation?”

“My son.”

Five Kisses (Shakarian, T)

This is a holiday cheer gift for @ritewine​ from @acequeenking. Happy Holidays ritewine, and may the Harbinger not swallow you whole.

Summary: It takes Garrus five kisses to find his happy ending. 

- - - 

1. The first time he kisses her properly is the night before they die.

For two people facing a suicide mission, they takes things damnably slow. Garrus knows this; regrets it yet somehow treasures it. He’s never been in a relationship where there’s anything but the physical, so this – the long conversations, the stolen moments where his shoulder can just barely brush against hers in the dining area  – is new territory. Welcome territory.

He holds her hand in the gunnery – the only place on this ship where he’s guaranteed there are no bugs, no change of the Illusive Man watching them, listening to them – and it feels…amazing. There’s an undercurrent of nervousness he’s not felt in a simple touch since the old reach and flexibility days, but Shepard is so much more than a nameless scout; she’s -

“Garrus,  can I ask you a favor?” She asks. Garrus watches the scars on her face, the way they move and glow; she hasn’t quite taken a rocket to the face, but she’s lived through trauma, all the same. They both have. Their scars are nearly in the same places, and both tell the same story: We’ve walked through hell. We survived. And he’s naive enough to hope that maybe – maybe – they can do that again.

Keep reading

You’ll Be Fine (Chase Davenport x reader)

A/N: Don’t judge me if the characters seem out of character, I haven’t watched Lab Rats in a while and well, I wanted to test my luck on writing this.

Summary: You’re also bionic, you’ve been dating your best friend, Bree’s brother, Chase. You’ve only been on a few missions with them, but Chase doesn’t like to bring you around any mission that involves Krane, afraid he is going to figure everything out and use you against him. But that fails as Marcus told Krane everything about you. Krana manages to kidnap you while everybody is on a mission while you’re helping from the base. 

Your P.O.V.

“From what I’m seeing from the camera on Chase’s vest, everything is in perfect condition.” You say, studying the blue prints, while looking at the video feed your boyfriend is sending you 

“Are you sure Y/N? Cause whoever sent this mission to us said it was malfunctioning.” Chase says 

“Yes Chase. I’m sure. I’m looking at the blue prints and the thing at the same time. Everything is fine. Whoever sent this mission must have either fixed it before you got there, or they tricked you.” You say, sighing, leaning against the desk turning around 

You listen to the others as they discuss what they’re supposed to do. You aren’t paying attention to anything around you until you hear footsteps coming down the hallway leading to the base. 

Keep reading


Sentinel Frank Rolland’s Armory

Being in the Brotherhood means they have no shortage of weaponry and armor, but they have a few preferred items.

Power Armor

  • BoS VI T-60F with jetpack, explosive vents, and other unique modifications: 
    • Exemplar’s Torso
    • Visionary’s Helm
    • Honor and Vengeance (legs)
    • Tesla L & R arms
    • This is their primary set of power armor
  • X-01 Mk. VI with jetpack, explosive vents, and a tactical red headlamp
    • This armor is generally used for longer engagements, or when they want to be extra intimidating


Standard issue BoS combat armor (heavy)


  • Peashooter: Troubleshooter’s laser pistol
  • Experiment 18-A: Plasma pistol
  • Righteous Authority (AKA Ol’ Reliable): Laser rifle
  • Fury: Plasmathrower
  • Damocles: Electrified assaultron blade


Their love of hi-tech guns does not transfer over to explosives. They prefer regular frag grenades and molotov cocktails to plasma and pulse grenades. It is likely, however, that this is because it’s not as easy to find plasma and pulse grenades, so they are less practiced with them.

Spoilers....just.... so much spoilers

So I just got done watching guardians of the galaxy vol 2, and I really liked it. The humor, the bitchin’ music, the baby groot. And I really liked the improbable, slightly absurd space dad plot, which basically boiled down to ‘fuck you, I’m a space god!’
Anyway, at the end of the movie, (and here are the SPOILERS, so just keep scrollin of you want a surprise and haven’t seen it yet) Peter also goes all 'fuck you, space dad! I’m a space god too!’ (Space demigod? Can I call this Peter Quill and the Celestials of the Universe?) Then punches him repeatedly and blows up a planet.
Because he blows up the dad-planet, his bitchin’ space god powers don’t work now. Or do they??? Probably not, but I’ve already switched into conspiracy mode, so let’s grab our tinfoil hats and overthink this shit!
So Peter and his bros blow up the god-power source. That’s pretty much the whole point of the final battle. But I don’t think it means Star Lord lost his space powers, and if he did, only for a lil bit.
Why? Well, mostly because marvel didn’t really go super in depth about god genetics or where light power comes from, but aLSO BECAUSE OF DOCTOR STRANGE. now, this is going to sound crazy, and it probably is, but hear me out. Doctor strange is all about alternate dimensions and sorcery and all that, and a HUGE plot point in it is that some crazy wizard idiots can draw power from the 'dark dimension’ where another crazy space god lives , Dormmamu. (No idea how to spell his name.) Dormmamu has a lot in common with full-of-himself, Ego, in that:
1.both immortal
2.both physical embodiments of energy, or space, or something
3.both assholes that want to make universe better by destroying it. (More like pulling a borg and assimilating, but same dif.)
Now, Ego mentions that he had to do the sideways tango a LOT of times with a LOT of different species(dressed up as the lead singer of a garage band from the seventies, because apparently nothing turns a ball of sentient slime on more than a greasy human looking dude) in order to have a kid that was a space god like him. The problem was most of his kids didn’t have the reality warping gene, so he killed them and tried again.
BUT HUMANS. Humans were different. The reason Quill got the Space Power is because, in a way, humans ALREADY HAVE IT. Humans, through knowledge, focus, and practice, can create other dimensions, and draw power from less then credible sources like a med student takes out loans, and make magic portals with just a little help from other magic stuff. Now I’m not sure if all humans in the MCU can do this, or just certain people. That’s not the point. The point is that some people CAN do it, and maybe Peter’s mom was one of them. Not trained, but maybe had the potential to.
So the reason Peter was different wasn’t because he had the right gene. He was different from everyone else in disappointment cave because he had the right COMBO of genes. All of Ego’s kids could, in theory, warp reality, but they COULDN’T CONNECT THEMSELVES TO A POWER SOURCE, like a remote control that had a messed up battery pack. Peter could, and could do it quite easily because he was half god AND half human, the species of 'play with this and see what happens’.
Now, I’m not sure about god genetics, like I said earlier, but it’s implied in both movies that the asshole space gods aren’t just connected to a power source, they ARE that power source. (Hence why Peter could control power easily, he was partly made of, or a part of, Ego’s power source.) So, and this is just speculation, but WHAT IF Peter is also, in his own way, a power source? (All of the other god kids were too, but they had absolutely no control over it, since no control genes. What’s a limb good for if it isn’t connected to the nervous system?)
Not an all powerful power source, but maybe a little one, dampened down by mortal genes. This would be AWESOME, though really unlikely, because I want peter to still do cool stuff. Not OP, movie breaking cool stuff, but like plasma ball grenade cool stuff. Scarlet witch with guns and one-liners cool stuff. PLUS, if he’s a little bit power source, he could get tapped into by sorcerers, or evil sorcerers, and MAYBE get controlled by them??? Plot idea??? But because he’s also got tapping powers, potentially HE COULD tap into, say, the dark dimension, and become like a sub-god to dormmamu, or whatever god he’s taking power from. I mean, PROBABLY NOT, but it would be FUCKING AMAZING IF THAT WERE TRUE


i mean an underground base is cool but as i distinctly remember my base was definitely above ground. ok let’s dig it out with our shovel. (our shovel uses plasma grenades to dig. don’t do this at home kids)



AAAAAAAND LET’S OPEN THE DOOR wait what there’s soil inside!? eff this

and that’s the story of how Traveller Dorian Pallas set off into the Great Unknown, in search of a new base

Let’s be real guys: Donut is the toughest member of the Red team.

Dude has survived almost as many near-deaths as Wash. 

I’m pretty sure if he got into a fight with Locus, Locus would lose because Donut is fucking immortal. 

“I’ve shot you five times, how are you not dead!”

“I grew up in Iowa!”

“What does that have to do with-”

And then Donut lobs as plasma grenade at Locus’ chest and that’s the end of that.

beckyh2112  asked:

AU meme: Vader leaves with Luke after RotJ, interpret that as you will.

  • Vader is like “you already saved me” and dies, as your eleventh-hour-reformed villains do, and Luke is like “GREAT WELL THAT DOESN’T MEAN WE DON’T STILL HAVE SHIT TO DO, DAD, COME ON” and manages to restart his heart and jerry-rig his respirator back into horseshoes-and-plasma-grenades working order and drag him off the ship and into a Rebel med bay. Luke Skywalker does not accept that some things cannot be stopped–not until he’s done EVERY damn thing he can to stop them. The Rebels in the med bay are VERY CONCERNED, but also this is Luke Skywalker. Also this is Luke Skywalker’s SAD SPACE PUPPY EYES as he very quietly says “I understand what I am asking of you, but please save my father”. 
  • Leia is gonna fucking burn a motherfucker down. Leia is gonna fucking burn a MOON down. Luke is like “I believe he wants to change” and Leia is like “he can’t CHANGE!!” and Luke is like “he did the first time” and Leia is like “THAT IS APPARENTLY TRUE BUT NOT ACTUALLY A GOOD THING, LUKE”. The doctors and nurses are too busy being like “oh Force what kind of HELL-SUIT has this poor bastard been living his life in I mean yes he probably deserves it but also I TOOK AN OATH, Master Jedi PLEASE TELL US WE’RE ALLOWED TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT THIS, THIS IS INHUMANE.” 
  • “Wait what,” Luke and Leia say, and then the lead medical officer explains what a motherfucking disaster of a torture device Vader’s life-support system, suit, and prosthetics pretty much all are. Aside from the one arm, anyway, the one arm’s fine. The rest, though. The rest is fucking NIGHTMARE FUEL. Luke and Leia share a long, stricken, ANGRY look, and they don’t even know which one of them is feeling which. Then they tell the doctors to fix anything that’s outright dangerous or painful and they’ll figure out the rest when–“if,” Leia mutters darkly–Vader wakes up. That’ll have to be enough, for now. 
  • And then Vader wakes up on a table and thinks ah, yes, it was the dream again. of course. And then Luke reaches out to touch his shoulder and Vader opens his eyes and realizes that no, this time it wasn’t a dream. And it wasn’t “Vader” who woke up, either. 
  • And then Anakin Skywalker has a lot of work to do. 

anonymous asked:

Hey I just wanted to say that you and your fics are awesome. I was also wondering if you've ever played the mass effect games, and if you have, have you ever considered writing stories for it?

/side-eyes @e153n

I have played a very small amount of Mass Effect, specifically ME2. I am aware of the story progression, but I was soured on shooters by my brother when I was young (he spawn-camped me in Golden Eye the first time I ever played) and then again by my beloved spouse (who stuck a plasma grenade to my helmet the first time I played Halo) so as soon as my character had a gun I checked out of the game. 

HOWEVER! I recently fell in love with Fallout and learned to not hate shooting things digitally, so there is a chance I will revisit the ME universe, albeit a small one. Eisen really wants me to write a Chakwas fic… did he put you up to this? You can tell me, it’s okay. ;)

War Wounds

Part II.

In one world, Felix stabs Tucker, and Tucker stands back up. In one world he endures phantom pain and scar tissue and nightmare, but he survives, and continues to survive, and be a survivor. He learns his way around soldiers and death and can smile at it, the same way he smiles at his friends. He lives and he stands beside Washington as they face a new enemy, in one world.

This is not that world.

Part I.

Keep reading


For many, the original Halo means memories. Whether it’s emerging from a crashed escape pod on the surface of a stunningly idyllic ringworld or making a daring escape across besieged hull of the Pillar of Autumn, we remember these moments like they’re real. One of the most indelible memories is the storming of the beach to take the Silent Cartographer. As twin dropships deploy troops on the shore of a remote island, you sink your feet into the sand and begin to Sprint headlong into a Covenant fortified position, hidden in the shadow of an alien archway. Then you fight. Over and over again.

Because it’s fun. As the Master Chief, you’re formidable and lethal, not overpowered but emphatically powerful. You flank, you snipe from afar, or you drive right for the center. It doesn’t get old or boring, no matter how long you’ve played this mission. That’s what Halo: Combat Evolved was all about. Isaac Hannaford, who is keenly familiar with all of the above, has vividly recreated this scene in remarkable order, with the Chief looking on toward the impending conflict, a utopian island on an alien ringworld: beauty and mystery perfectly woven together. A memory is about to be made…

Halo Classic Medal Pin

You fought the Covenant, took out the flood and destroyed the Halo installation. Don’t worry, we’ve got a medal for that based on the logo from the first game! Some Spartans may even get their hands on a rare, gold variant.

Halo Icons Master Chief

We’re just getting started! The Master Chief just crash landed on an alien ringworld and finds himself in the middle of the Halo conflict! Ready for a fight, the Chief leaps over a pesky Grunt and launches into battle. This figure is based on the original Halo: Combat Evolved models for the  Chief, the assault rifle and the Grunt! Customize your fight to the finish when you collect and connect the other Halo Icons figures.

Plasma Grenade Mug

Need a holy flare to light the Journey? Yeah, that’s what we call our morning cup of coffee, too. Stick your hands on the 16 oz Plasma Grenade mug! Remember to hand wash only - you don’t want to accidentally set it off!

Plasma Sword Letter Opener

Join the ranks of the Sangheili Zealots wield this iconic, noble weapon to access all of your important intel! Plus, it lights up just like a real Energy Sword when you hit the switch on the hilt.

Captain Keyes T-Shirt

Bring your wardrobe to Combat Alert Alpha and take the helm of the UNSC Pillar of Autumn in this is exclusive tee, with medals modeled after those worn by Captain Jacob Keyes in Halo: Combat Evolved  (including the Easter egg medal)!

Data Drop Files (Page 1 of 2)

These classified, historic documents are for your eyes only! They detail the Covemant’s first encounter with the Alpha Halo and include a lore-saturated message between the upper-echelon of the UNSC.

Data Drop Files (Page 2 of 2)

These classified, historic documents are for your eyes only! They detail the Covemant’s first encounter with the Alpha Halo and include a lore-saturated message between the upper-echelon of the UNSC.

Data Drop Files (Postcard 1 of 2)

These classified, historic documents are for your eyes only! They detail the Covemant’s first encounter with the Alpha Halo and include a lore-saturated message between the upper-echelon of the UNSC.

Data Drop Files (Postcard 2 of 2)

These classified, historic documents are for your eyes only! They detail the Covemant’s first encounter with the Alpha Halo and include a lore-saturated message between the upper-echelon of the UNSC.

Data Drop Files (Installation 04 Library Card)

These classified, historic documents are for your eyes only! They detail the Covemant’s first encounter with the Alpha Halo and include a lore-saturated message between the upper-echelon of the UNSC.

Halo 5: Guardians REQ Pack and Sticker Shock Set

Available only for Halo Legendary Crate subscribers! Contains an exclusive Fireteam Apollo in-game emblem, 5 Sticker Shock weapon skins, and an array of Uncommon to Legendary REQ  (subject to availability).

Bring your REQ Pack to life with the stickers used on the sticker shock weapon skins!

A New Player's follies, and beating the DM at his own game

Ok, so, this is the story of one of my first Rifts characters, a human Crazy named Saiko(wasn’t yet very imaginative with the names). For those who aren’t in the know, Rifts is a game defined by the words “broken”, “everything forever”, and “power scaling”, and takes place on a future Earth where nuclear war activated the Earth’s ley lines, resurrected magic, and plunged what was left of the planet into an unknown number of centuries of chaos as dimensional rifts opened all across the planet, dumping things in and taking things out, until all the activity finally began to settle. A little bit.

I hadn’t yet joined a group since I felt I was too new, so my DM was running me in a solo campaign to get me used to how tabletop gaming works. When I saw Crazies, I had to play one. They’re mercs that, for whatever reason, have little or nothing left to lose in life, or maybe just seek power, and undergo a procedure to have small implants placed into their brain. These implants stimulate and alter the brain in ways that affect their bodies, making them superhuman. Enhanced senses, insane reflexes, improved speed, strength, and recovery. The downside is… the implants slowly and inevitably drive you insane. And me, well, I didn’t want to wait, so I cut the GM a deal and decided to take on the first seven levels of insanity(out of a fifteen-level system) right away, so I could put together a character concept I had, and then not gain any new insanities until level eight. He agreed, and then immediately regretted it, because Saiko had six separate personalities and they tended to fluctuate on a hair-trigger. What’s worse, each separate personality had their own set of insanities.

I had the idea that Rifts was more of a “do whatever you want” game as opposed to “the GM sort of has a specific plan in mind” since I was so new, so I didn’t think that playing such a chaotic individual would be any problem.

Well… he got fed up pretty quick, when I(semi-OOC, too) mistook a hostile NPC for someone completely benign and friendly. This guy shows up shortly after I accept a mission to visit a nearby town and help them deal with a bandit situation and enters-stage-left with a crazy display of acrobatics, decked out in medium environmental armor and armed to the teeth. All Saiko does is try to show him up with an even more-impressive feat, leaving himself completely-open to a throat-slashing. One healing coma later after being left for dead, he wakes up in an alley, completely devoid of all possessions, clothing, and armor. The GM figured this would be a bit of a wakeup call, but didn’t account for something.

The main personality had an… attachment to his extensive collection of rolls of duct-tape. He believed duct-tape gave him his power, and had forgotten all about his implants. Without duct-tape, he couldn’t function. When he woke up and found himself completely bereft, not a scrap remaining, he panicked, and a personality shift occurred. The dice, unfortunately, turned up a psychotic killer so consumed with mindless rage that he couldn’t function properly six out of seven days a week(why did I think this was a great idea?). A woman and her children were bent over the Crazy, seeing if he was ok. The mindless one swiped at her head so hard his fingers were buried *in* her head, killing her instantly. He then threw her body at the fleeing/screaming children and screamed incoherently at the sky. A panic started, as on-edge citizens believed a monster attack was occuring, and the city guard went on high-alert. As Saiko exited the alley, stark naked, covered in blood, and snarling, my GM tersely informed me that there were four city guardsmen standing on nearby rooftops, already taking notice of me. Full environmental body armor except for helmets, heavy railguns(the expensive sort that don’t need a heavy backpack to supply power), and bad attitudes. He had me roll a common sense check against my IQ, which obviously crit-failed, and Saiko pegged the guards for his next targets. What followed was so ridiculous that my GM wasn’t even mad when the dust settled.

“One of the guards sees you, and apparently is going to shoot first and ask questions later. Roll to dodge.”

18 on the dice, and Crazies can dodge bullets, even lasers, without penalty. I leapt straight up with a telekinetic assist, both avoiding the barrage of metal needles and clearing the two stories to the rooftop of the nearest guard in one move. This one hadn’t yet seen me and the initiative among the rest of us was mine, so I used a second TK Leap to jump-kick him in the back of the neck(no helmets, after all). That armor would have shrugged off any of my attacks without any difficulty, but putting my foot through his neck was much like putting it through a wet newspaper. One down, three to go. I passed two more dodges, grabbing the fallen railgun as I went, casually popped off two more guards before dropping back down to street level, and took cover behind a vehicle. The GM was getting terrible rolls, and I hadn’t gotten anything below a 16. One naked crazy man was dropping trained guardsmen left and right.

Unfortunately, my luck seemed almost at an end. The last guard was furious, calling in reinforcements, grieving her fallen friends, and her suppressive fire was slowly closing in on me. I asked the GM if I could roll against my IQ for a moment of lucidity and, relieved, he granted it to me. He was doubly-relieved when I passed, and could act sane for the next few seconds.

“Great. I inspect my railgun. Does it have any attachments, like a grenade launcher?”

“…..” Once the shock wore and he resigned himself, he confirmed that yes, it did.

“Ok, I’m going to jump atop this vehicle and fire wildly at the top edge of her building.” Obviously, my rolls were more than sufficient. Obviously, it happened to be a plasma grenade, and completely engulfed the guard in the blast radius. Obviously, like the others, she didn’t have a helmet on and everything but her head survived the attack.

We were out of time for the day at this point, so, laughing(half in jest, half in fake-anger), the GM had a random band of mages subdue me without any possibility of resistance, and we called it a day.

… but not before I used Telekinesis to Nat19 a shard of plate glass into the back of one of their heads a second before being struck unconscious.


Pilot Theo Fontaine                         Mission Day: 3
Pilot Status: Managed to stop bleeding

   Oh god, I am not in a good way. Day 3 and I already almost died? Guuh, beyond being painful, this is just embarrassing.
   So I haven’t been finding very many specimen worth writing home about. So far there’s been really nothing bigger than maybe Earth-Dog size, and all in all, very unassuming.
   Imagine my surprise when walking through some tall grass and I suddenly receive a wallop that sends me sprawling to the ground. My sensors indicated a suit rupture on my left side, because the huge gash i received just wasn’t enough to let me know.
   I looked up and lo and behold, a friggin space deer winding up for another murderous charge. A space deer!
   Two plasma grenades and a magazine of ammo later, space-Bambi lay in pieces and I was hobbling back to my ship. Fortunately I hadn’t strayed too far.
   I flew back to one of the Vy'keen outposts for help. The exchange was… rather interesting. He didn’t seem to pay much urgency to my injury (they are a rather fanatic warrior race after all). He handed me a picture of a sultry looking Vy'keen and then gave me a very questioning stare. Bitch, I’m bleeding all over your floor, I have no time for whatever the hell game this is. So I hastily agreed to whatever he was nudging at me.
   And now I’m betrothed. Fffffwwhat? Alright. I don’t even care. He certainly did though. in fact he was so  overjoyed he gave me some weapons parts and helped patch me up.
   These aliens I tell ya. Anyway, I’m just sitting in my ship now letting the nanytes take care of my wound while I sort out my findings.

                                                                           Don’t feed the deer