plan relief

The Signs as Nice Things that can Happen
  • aries: someone you really like or look up to playfully teasing you about something you did, and you finding it just as funny as they do
  • taurus: the family you're babysitting for saying you can help yourself to anything in the fridge
  • gemini: the excitement in the air on a friday before a long weekend, everyone eagerly asking about each other's plans, and the collective relief when the day is finally done
  • cancer: someone playing with your hair, falling asleep on your shoulder, or holding your hand for the first time
  • leo: the teacher using something you did as an example of a job well done, as the other members of your class ask how you managed to do it with admiration in their voices
  • virgo: waking up in the middle of the night only to find someone else also awake, both of you sleepy, bedheaded, and in your pajamas
  • libra: being told that someone has been saying nice things about you when you aren't around, or finding out that a person you thought never noticed you actually thinks you're a really cool
  • scorpio: staying up late talking about the deeper, most honest, parts of life with someone you really care about
  • sagittarius: going to a concert and being able to sing the words to every song, feeling the music under your feet and in your bones
  • capricorn: getting home after a long day knowing that theres nothing pressing you have to do that night, being able to take off your shoes, sit down, and relax
  • aquarius: being alone in a place that you've only ever seen when it's crowded, hearing the echo of your footsteps instead of the usual tangle of voices
  • pisces: being somewhere public in the presence of a big storm, everyone in the room gathering to look out the window and comment on the weather
John Mulaney Sentence Starters
  • "The more you do stuff, the better you get at dealing with how you still fail at it a lot of the time."
  • "All my money is in a savings account. My dad has explained the stock market to me maybe 75 times. I still don't understand it."
  • "It is 100% easier not to do things than to do them, and so much fun not to do them - especially when you were supposed to do them."
  • "In terms of instant relief, canceling plans is like heroin."
  • "I was always the squarest person in the cool room, and alternatively, sometimes the weirder person at the mainstream table."
  • "I have a lot of stories about being a kid because it was the last time I was interesting."
  • "Why do people shush animals? They've never spoken."
  • "A lot of times you're anxious and people say, "Relax. Shut up." And that just feels like, Well, I guess I'm also crazy."
  • "I'm an idiot, but I've shoveled through life rather nicely so far."
  • "I kind of thought, wouldn't it be funny to take a swing at being on the weird side of mainstream?"
  • "I like when things are crazy. Something good comes out of exhaustion."
  • "There's just something really, really funny about someone tearing into me."
  • "Being president looks like the worst job in the world."
  • "Thirteen year olds are the meanest people in the world."
  • "I always though quick sand was gonna be a much bigger problem than it turned out to be."
  • "'Do you want a salad or fries?' that's like asking 'Do you want to go for a jog or freebase cocaine?'"
  • “You have the moral backbone of a chocolate éclair.”
  • “Anyone who’s seen my dick and met my parents needs to die; I can’t have them roaming around. They know too much.”
  • "I was once on the telephone with blockbuster video- Which is a very old fashioned sentence."
  • "I cannot express to you the humiliation of, every Saturday morning, putting on a pair of breakaway pants and never having a reason to break them away -- then they're just pants."
  • "My body is bad at sports: that's the problem."
  • "It was so beautiful today that I only watched four hours of "Law & Order" in my apartment."
  • "I don't look older, I just look worse."
  • "So, I would just have a couple of drinks, and my brain would be like, 'OK, I see where this is headed. We're just going to power down now and get restarted sometime tomorrow morning'."
  • "Here's how easy it was to get away with bank robbery back in the '30s -- as long as you weren't still there when the police arrived, you had a 99% chance of getting away with it."
  • "'Ocean's 11' with women wouldn't work 'cause two would keep breaking off to talk sh*t about the other nine."
  • “Sometimes I’ll be talking to someone, and I’ll be like ‘Yeah, I’ve been really lonely lately’ and they’ll be like ‘Well we should hang out!’ and I’m like ‘No, that’s not what I meant. That’s not what I meant at all.”
  • "We'd all go play jacks by the soda fountain."
  • "No one knows what you're talking about you idiot."
  • "Blackout drinking is when your brain goes to sleep but your body gets all 'Eye of the Tiger' and soldiers on.'
  • "Am I proud of it? No. Just like I'm not proud of the fact that I saw the movie The Notebook in theaters. But it happened!"
  • "You don't know me. I have secrets. Why yesterday I wore my footie pajamas under my clothes and pretended I was a fucking fireman."
  • “Excuse me: I am homeless. I am gay. I have AIDS. I'm new in town.”
  • "Because we're Delta Airlines and life is a fucking nightmare!"
  • "I could never be goth, don't get me wrong, I'm unhappy, it's not that."
  • "To me Person of Interest is almost too flattering. Like, if the police were to pound on my door and go 'A man has been murdered in your building and you are a person of interest' I'd be like 'Moi? Oh do go on. Fresh.' "
  • "Ma'am can you turn off your bluetooth? This is a baptism."
  • "It was really easy to get away with murder before they knew about DNA."
  • "Do you want a plate of fries? If I get fries for the table would you take some? I know you'll eat fries if I get fries!"
  • "I watch so much Law and Order that sometimes I think I'm on an episode of Law and Order."
  • "You asked if I brushed my teeth but I never specified that I did so tonight. If the court reporter reads back my remarks you will see I did not purger myself."
  • "Traveling can get kinda lonely sometimes, actually no that's not the right word, Life. Life can get kinda lonely sometimes."
  • "Scientists have long since wondered if you can make grown men and women cry by playing Tom Jones' It's Not Unusual. And the answer is yes."
  • "Like my god man people are dead! But no you keep stacking those boxes."
  • "You seen this shit? You seen this Home Alone 2: Lost in New York shit?"
  • "As they say in Jerry Maguire, 'You had me at AIDS.'”
  • “Papa, today I met a boy with no eyes.”
  • "Adult life is already so goddamn weird."
But a BNHA zombie AU

Continuing on my headcannon train, Mar and I were yelling about a zombie apocalypse AU and I just

  • It hits one day out of nowhere and naturally the first people Kirishima calls are Bakugou and Kanimari
  • Their dorms are near enough to each other that it’s easy to meet up – not many people have turned by this point anyway
  • They find Jirou and Momo on the way over, picking them up
  • Deku calls Kacchan to make sure he’s okay and is promptly told to fuck off
  • ((needless to say Izuku and Uraraka show up half an hour later with medical supplies and rations))
  • They hold out for the military, the Red Cross, any kind of relief plan from the government
  • Spoiler alert: it never comes
  • Almost a month later (internet and electricity are still up and running???) Izuku hears about a safe space out in DC from his friend Iida
  • SO THEY HEAD OUT bc isn’t that how all of these stories start?
  • The streets are mostly empty save for.. you know… the zombies
  • Bakugou is tasked with explosives – maltov cocktails are his specialty
  • Kirishima with a baseball bat
  • Healer/medic Deku who’s pretty good with a knife when necessary
  • Uraraka’s pretty great with a knife herself
  • Sharp shooter Jirou
  • Momo with a steel pipe
  • Kaminari who’s good with a gun but specializes in electrical work – he can hotwire any car and ((very rarely)) fix electrical enough on abandoned houses so they don’t have to live in the dark
  • They run into Todoroki and his samurai sword a few hours outside of Boston and he tags along too

Gonna put the rest under the cut before this gets too long bc I HAVE SO MANY IDEAS FOR THIS AU

Keep reading

In the past 12 years, the U.S. has spent more than $1.4 billion funding abstinence programs in Africa. They’re part of a larger program — called the President’s Emergency Plan for AIDS Relief — aimed at stopping the spread of HIV around the world.

Many health officials consider PEPFAR a succes. It is credited with giving lifesaving HIV drugs to more than 5 million people and preventing nearly 1 million babies from getting HIV from their mothers.

But a study, published Monday in Health Affairs, finds the abstinence programs have been a failure.

U.S. Spent $1.4 Billion To Stop HIV By Promoting Abstinence. Did It Work?

Photo: Per-Anders Pettersson/Getty Images
Caption: A billboard asks Ugandans to abstain from sex until marriage. The photo was taken in 2005 in Kampala.

Stiles x Reader: “I promise it’ll get done”

Prompt: “I have absolutely no faith in your ability to get this job done.” AU

Originally posted by abbraccicomemedicine

A/N: I’m pretty sure I made this gender neutral but if I made a mistake please tell me. Not my best work because I wanted to get this out.


You sighed and hit your lip as you followed Stiles into the kitchen. You loved him, trusted him with your life even…

But you didn’t trust him with this. 

Your younger sister was having a birthday party tonight and you were originally going to make her birthday cake, but Coach scheduled extra practice a few days ago for you and your team and you couldn’t back out of it, no matter how much you tried. Stiles saw how stressed you were and offered to make it instead. You agreed to the plan, originally feeling relief but now as you thought about it, you regretted it. Your mind seemed to play through each and every memory of Stiles falling or dropping something… 

You took a deep breath before you spoke,”You know I can tell Coach that I feel sick and stay here in order to help you,” 

Stiles shook his head and began to lightly push you out of the house,”No. No. No. I got this okay just go to your practice,” 

“Are you sure you have this handled?” you asked, turning towards him as you stood in the doorway. 

Stiles smiled at you and squeezed your shoulders,”I promise it will get done,” You gave him a soft kiss before leaving, needing to rush in order to make it in time.

 An exhausting two hours later you opened the door to your house, sniffing the air to see if anything was burnt. Once the coast was clear you walked into the kitchen where Stiles was putting a cake into the fridge. 

“You actually got a cake,” you mumbled. 

Stiles put a hand to his heart,”I’m hurt by your words Y/N. I think I’ll need a kiss in order to feel better,” You smiled at him before cupping his face and giving him a soft kiss. You pulled away from him and smiled at him again before grabbing your phone so that you could order the pizza for your sister’s party. 


You sat down on your couch, exhausted from chasing after your sister and her friends with Stiles. You didn’t even have a chance to relax after practice before your Mom put you and Stiles on babysitting duty while she got everything set up. 

“Y/N!” your Mom yelled making you jump up, “Help serve cake,” You sighed to yourself before nodding and helping her cut the cake while she served it. It was a few minutes before the doorbell rang and your Mom went to go get it. After you finished serving the cake you noticed something sticking out of the top of the trashcan. You furrowed your eyebrows and walked towards it, grabbing the small box that was sticking out. You covered your mouth in order to keep yourself from bursting out laughing as you recognized the bakery from across the street’s logo. 

You put the box back in the trash and pushed it down better this time before yo went to go look for Stiles and the kids. After a few minutes of searching downstairs you heard giggling from your room upstairs. 

You slowly climbed the stairs and this time you weren’t able to keep your laughter in control. Stiles had his entire face covered in very horrible make up. Different parts of his face were different shades of foundation, his eye shadow went up to his eyebrows, the kids had used the eyebrows pencil to make him look angry, and the lipstick was like clown make up. When Stiles looked over at you, relief appeared on his face and he was silently begging you to help him. 

“Hand me my lipstick,” you told your little sister with a smirk. She gave you a worried look believing she was in trouble before handing it over to you. You smiled at Stiles before you began to put more lipstick on his lips, making sure to almost completely miss his lips. “There you go! Perfect,’ you commented. Stiles glared at you before your Mom called the kids down and it was just you two in your room. 

“Why did you do that?” Stiles asked as he wiped at his face, only spreading the make up around. 

You sarcastically shrugged,”I don’t know. Just like I don’t know why you lied about the cake,”

Stiles looked at you with wide eyes,”H-How did-” 

“I found the box the cake came in, you had it sticking out at the top,” you answered. 

Stiles sighed and hung his head down,”I’m sorry. It’s just that you were so stressed about it,” After this Stiles stood up and started rambling as he walked around your room. You adjusted yourself so that your entire body was facing him and watched him with an amused smile. 

“And I burnt the first cake! I don’t know what happened with the second one but it was not edible! By that time I couldn’t make another one before the party started so I made a quick trip to the bakery that my Dad got his cake last year. Y/N? Why aren’t you saying anything?” 

You smiled at Stiles before pecking his cheek,”Just don’t lie to me again. It will be a lot worse than a bad make up job. Okay Stiles?” 

He nodded and leaned closer in order to kiss you properly before you pushed his face away. 

“I’ll help you get cleaned up before any kisses,” you teased before pushing him towards the bathroom. Stiles nodded and was about to walk out before he surprised you with a sloppy kiss on your cheek. “Ugh Stiles!” you exclaimed as yo wiped at your face before chasing him out of your room. 

Recovery - Chapter 2

A/N: Hello! I want you to know that updates are going to be planned for every Friday. I may post earlier if it is finished earlier, but my plan is for Friday updates. I am also trying to write up Ellie’s recovery plan for Bucky in a report form. If you guys would be interested in me posting that at the end, please let me know!

REMINDER: THIS STORY CONTAINS SPOILERS FOR CAPTAIN AMERICA: CIVIL WAR.

Chapter 1


Chapter 2

Steve sighed with relief. The plan had been approved, even by T’Challa by some miracle. He had agreed to get assistance in rehabilitating Bucky.

But that was the easy part. The road ahead was going to be rocky. First, Steve and Ellie had to get secret transport to Wakanda, where Bucky was being hidden. Then, Bucky had to agree to it. The hardest part, though? Keeping this off of Tony Stark’s and the United Nation’s radars. As Ellie was employed by what was left of SHIELD, this was very far off of the books on confidential files.

“Are you ready?” Steve asked Ellie. She nodded.

“As ready as I can be. Since T’Challa has everything ready for us over there, I have to be.”

Steve regarded her carefully. “Are you sure?”

“Yes. Your friend needs help. We can do this.”

He smiled and they got on the small plane hired by T’Challa. They would be flying to another small airport, where they would catch another plane and fly over the Atlantic. Their call sign was designated as an aid mission, and it wasn’t wrong.

They arrived after many hours, Steve not talking much and Ellie studying her plan, which contained multiple versions of handling situations that might arise.

Once they had landed, Steve turned toward Ellie. “You need to know something else about him.”

“I’m listening.”

“He’s in cryo right now. He decided to be put back when the Avengers team split up. So when we go inside, he’s still going to be frozen.”

“Okay. I understand.”

“Okay.”

T’Challa greeted them once they arrived at his home. Ellie tried to curtsy, but he assured her that it was not necessary. Ellie blushed out of embarrassment.

“Come,” he insisted, gesturing toward the hallway nearby. The visitors followed him.

“So,” the king of Wakanda began and turned to Ellie, “you have a plan?”

“Yes, sir, I do.”

“Would you allow me to take a look at the plan?”

“Yes.” She dug the stack of neatly bound papers out of the carrying bag and handed it to him. “This is the only copy, so it’s less likely that anyone outside of whomever is involved will know what we are doing.”

“And how is it that you are able to be here without anyone knowing?”

“I’m hired under ‘consultant.’”

The king nodded.

Before they entered the room, he stopped them and said, “There is something that you must see before we wake him.”

They went over to a locked storage closet next to the room that Steve remembered Bucky being in that required a retinal scan and a fingerprint scan to get into. T’Challa pulled out a small red notebook. It had a black star on the front cover.

“We found this at the compound where the fake doctor had initiated the programming the day that your friend escaped. It appears that this was what he had used when the brainwashed programming was opened up again.”

Steve inhaled sharply. “What’s it doing here? Are you going to try to use it to reverse what they did to Bucky with this?”

“That is the plan. That is why it is kept locked up. Eleanor, how good is your Russian?”

“My mom trained me to be fluent in a few different languages, but my Russian is a bit rusty. I can do it, though.”

“Assistance will be provided at your request.”

“I think I might take you up on that.” Ellie turned the book over in her hands. “Sir, after everything is done, after James is… cured, for lack of a better word, can I have your permission to destroy this book? We can, of course, keep the techniques in the reversal process report, but I don’t think that this information should be kept intact for longer than we need it.”

T’Challa nodded. “Permission granted.”

She handed the book back to him and he locked it up again, Steve’s face portraying what he wasn’t saying.

The room to the cryo tube was locked and as T’Challa unlocked it, he explained, “To keep people out.”

It was enough for Steve to understand that for the first time, someone was doing something to protect Bucky other than him. That caused a wave of relief to run through him.

When they entered the room, Ellie was floored to the point that she stopped. She didn’t look hard through the room’s windows to the hallway before she had entered, but inside was the cryo tube with the man that she was hired to help asleep inside.

He was very handsome. She had only ever seen pictures and news reports with his face, but they never did him justice.

“His vitals have been consistent and he has shown no evidence that he is in any danger when he wakes up.”

Steve nodded. “When can we start?”

“Shortly. I will need to make sure there are two doctors on hand to be ready when he wakes up, and it would be good if we have sustenance available, as well.” The king sent for the two things. “In the meantime, why don’t we discuss some of the things that you will need as per this plan.”

“Well….” Ellie began. She explained the process that she anticipated and what she would need available at each step. The king of Wakanda did not interrupt as she explained. He merely nodded in understanding. When she had finished, the doctors and the food and water had been brought in. it was a small amount, so she assumed that he had eaten before being put under.

“I will return this plan to you shortly. I would like to read it in depth, rather than the shortened version that I agreed to. Everything that you have specified will be provided for you, I can assure you.”

“Thank you, sir.”

“And Eleanor?” he said.

“Sir?”

“You may call me T’Challa.”

She blushed again. “I understand.”

He smiled and Steve gently grabbed her arm, pulling her back so that the doctors could do their work in waking Bucky up. It took longer to wake him up than it did to put him under, but it had to be done carefully. The doctors were concerned with his health, and they cared about their patient. Ripping him out of cryo sleep could be dangerous to his health. Ellie doubted that the people who continuously froze and unfroze the man before cared about that to any degree.

After the slow process of thawing the cryogenic ice, the clear round door opened. He began to move ever so slightly, and his breathing patterns were shallow due him getting used to breathing again. The doctors moved forward to unbuckle to stabilizing restraints and helped him down into a chair. Steve placed a hand on Ellie’s shoulder and moved forward. Ellie stayed where she was.

Steve crouched down in front of Bucky and Bucky’s eyes blinked slowly. “Hey.”

Bucky’s eyes squinted through the light so that he could see Steve. He smiled weakly and Steve smiled back.

“How are you feeling?” Steve asked as the doctors took Bucky’s pulse and checked his breathing as it returned to normal.

“A little tired.”

“Other than that?”

“Better than the last time that I woke up.”

The whole room understood that he meant when he woke up from the last cryo sleep from the grim tone in his voice. Steve just patted his friend’s right shoulder and stood up. Bucky followed with his eyes as Steve walked over to Ellie and brought her forward.

“Bucky, I’d like you to meet Ellie. She has offered to help us in finding a workable treatment for you.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, James,” Ellie spoke up and held out her hand. He shook it as best as he could.

“My name is Bucky,” he replied, his voice coming out gruffly.

“Okay, Bucky.” She gave him a small smile. He tried to smile back, but it came out more as a grimace.

“Thank you,” he said quietly. She thought that it meant that he was thanking her for using his preferred name, but it was so much more than that. He was thanking her for helping and being willing to.

T’Challa pulled Ellie aside to speak with her about the plan and Bucky looked at Steve.

“I trust her, and I will be here, so you can trust her, too. Background check cleared.” Steve assured his friend.

Bucky nodded. “Thank you.”

“I had a feeling that she would be better than someone that neither of us know.”

“She seems nice, so I’ll keep an open mind.”

Steve smiled and Bucky gave him a half smile back.

- - -

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10

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Hillary Clinton has updated her tax plan — and brought new relief to families with children

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