placat

Memory & Time

Memory can be a really tricky thing at the best of times, let alone when you’re in a place where the Gentry live. (Most people throw out their maps once they realize that the building essentially changes its layout every day.)

Hallways move. Doors lock and unlock. Various seats and desks vanish at their leisure. Sometimes entire rooms shift floors if only because the school is having a laugh. It’s definitely enough to make you wonder “Is is a Gentry thing or have I gone slightly crazy and forgotten where something is?” But probably the worst part of it all would be the people.

Elsewhere is a big place, and meeting everyone is basically impossible. You can try, and you might meet most people, but never everybody. So there will always be that one person you can never really get a chance to finally introduce yourself too. You placate yourself on the rumours and bits of knowledge you overhear from other students, because this one person just eludes you at every turn.

So when you finally corner them, say hi, they nervously say hi back and then leave. It’s a fairly decent friendship. You help out with their art work, they give a hand with law studies, it’s great. But then Elsewhere decides to pull one of those tricks on you.

Time shifts, just as it always does in Elsewhere. Elsewhere has always had problems with Time, people from the future or past just randomly showing up and wandering about. People try to take it in stride, nobody is quite sure of what time period somebody comes from. (It’s impolite to ask, you don’t ask somebody what historical era they’re from.)

Sometimes Time speeds up. Sometimes Time slows down. Sometimes it even reverses a little. Corners and cupboards and old classrooms nobody uses anymore, all areas where Time is just the tiniest bit warped out of the norm. Those places are everywhere - and it’s not often surprising when places cease to be or grow bigger over Time. Try to take it in stride, even if everyone you love is a hundred years dead. Relax, you’ll get back eventually.

And then you find your friend again. After… You think days? Or months? Time is confusing. They’re different now, all big smiles and colourful clothes, surrounded by dozens of friends when before you were the only one they had. They make jokes that they’d said were stupid, and they’re pretty smart at doing the art for their studies.

And you realize - damn them. Damn Memory. Damn Time.

Because that’s one of the problems of living here. After spending so much time away from somebody you knew, your Memory of them becomes solid. You remember everything they did. But Time can change them, Time changes everybody eventually.

And so you have to sit there, wondering…

Has Time actually changed them somehow?

Or is your Memory right, and that’s a Changeling over there?

You’ll probably never know for sure.

Not until Time and Memory hits you as well.

x

anonymous asked:

Honestly you and people like you give fascists a bad name. We try to disassociate ourselves from nazis and the likes of you for good reason because being associated with you will hold us back. We need to fix our public image and youre not any help in that department so why don't you just fuck off.

Nah, you’re just a pussy and a little bitch. Guess what fam, they’re always going to associate you with nazis and people like me. You being on the defensive and trying to placate them gives them the advantage.

You don’t know what fascism is. Fascism isn’t just some cold, clinical political framework. It’s sacred. You don’t deserve to call yourself a fascist. I hate you more than I hate any commie. You fucking coward, you fraud, you thief. Have fun ending up like Richard Spencer.

You know what? Fuck it and fuck you and if this is what fascism has become then fuck fascism too. 

I’m going off and creating my own club. No little bitches allowed. Except for those of the tiny female variety.

Residents of the Library: A Practical Guide for New Librarians
  • The books
    • Not to be disturbed unless there is an emergency
  • The shelves
    • Ask politely before attempting to clean, some are exceedingly fond of their dust
  • The woman in the reference section who is perpetually searching for a certain unknown volume
    • She will always refuse to tell you which one it is, but it’s good manners to ask her a few times a day anyway
  • The cat with five eyes
    • We recognize that this terminology can be confusing, as there are at least a dozen of the cat with five eyes living in the library, but each of them insists on being treated as though they’re the only one. Therefore, each of them is The Cat With Five Eyes
  • Unidentified cryptid
    • Possibly just The Cat With Five Eyes pulling a prank
  • The lost child
    • At this point we must assume, as the child has not aged or been picked up for several years, that it is not so much lost as it is stuck. In the meantime, until its parent returns, it must be placated hourly with new picture books or tantrums will be thrown
  • Library patron
    • ??????????
  • The helpful ghost
    • A benevolent presence that keeps trying to help shelve books and putting them back in the wrong place. Actually exceedingly unhelpful, but the title makes it so happy
  • The Stacks Goblin
    • DO NOT offer food!
    • Shame on you, there’s no food allowed in the library anyway.
fake dating! zimbits

It was only by a stroke of luck that Jack happened to look at his phone just as he exits the lecture hall. The group chat was blowing up – the group chat was always blowing up these days – but the lack of all-caps or exclamation marks caught his attention right away.

Eric Bittle: Guys, I wouldn’t ask this of y’all if I really didn’t need this, but I have to ask a HUGE favor of one of you.

Shitty Knight: brah are you dying

Justin Oluransi: You can have my kidney, Bits.

Adam Birkholtz: u aren’t gonna save that for me just in CASE, JUSTIN?

Larissa Duan: shit, bitty, r u ok

Eric Bittle: Um, yeah, mostly, I just…..need someone to pretend to be my boyfriend.

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Alien/Human Interactions

-Aliens seeing how many times humans declare war on each other throughout history and thinking that humans enjoy war as some sort of sport or spectacle

-Aliens coming into possession of human sci-fi horror films and being worried that their human companions are afraid of them

-Aliens coming into possession of positive human representations of aliens and forming huge crushes on Mr. Spock and ET

-Aliens first discovering humans through stray TV broadcasts of the Brady Bunch, Grease, and other vintage tv shows. Intergalactic fashion suddenly shifts to favor clothing similar to 50s greaser jackets and sweaters

-Aliens falling in love with human fashion and parading around in poorly applied makeup (the said aliens watched dozens of tutorials on YouTube), bonus points if the alien is traditionally masculine looking. “I look like your human goddess Beyonce and you cannot convince me otherwise, human Steve.”

-Aliens falling in love with human languages and printing human words all over their clothing like Americans do with French words. However, they often mix up the languages by picking and choosing which words they like the best, so the phrases turn out like “C'est good, nyet?”

-Aliens relating more to neurodivergent people because of how their brains work, bonding with humans over different strengths and weaknesses

-Aliens seeing all the ways humans go thrill-seeking (rollercoasters, skydiving, bungee-jumping, water slides) and scolding their humans for putting themselves in danger oN PURPOSE

-Aliens tasting spicy foods for the first time and and scolding their humans for eating FIRE

-Aliens being worried that their human love interests find them unattractive and trying different things to look more human

-Aliens being confused by human daydreaming and infant “pretending”. Why would humans want to be anything else? They are already perfect.

-Aliens having the same weird fantasy of being “abducted” and “probed” by humans that we have of them

-Aliens having weird 70s style videos on “Human Etiquette”, with incredibly inaccurate info on how humans actually act

-Aliens first coming into contact with dogs and animals because we sent those into space first, assuming that humans are the same and attempting to placate them with tummy rubs and rubs behind the ears

Little Speech Translations For Frustrated Caregivers

Yesh - Yes

Mmmph! (with a nod) -Yes

Nuuuu - No

Mmmph! (with arms crossed) - No

Dat? - What is that?

Dis -This, please

Nnnn - A sound of frustration. Starting holding out random items until they nod.

Giggles - Are you in the room? Why are you not in the room? Get in there and bring a towel or broom.

High pitched giggles - Disney movie.

Silence - They napping? No? See “Giggles”.

Crying - Good luck.

Daddeeee/Mummmeeee - I saw something online that I really want.

Daaaddeee/Muuummeeee- Storytime.

Random sounds spoken around a paci - No idea… Hold out stuffies until placated.


🚫 Do not interact if you post kink/porn/nsfw or are an 18+ only blog🚫

  • Them: Why do you want Lance to turn evil so much?
  • Me internally: The reason why I want Lance to become an antagonist in season 3 so bad is because I really don’t want to see his inferiority complex regarding Keith (which has been established since season 1) get resolved simply by getting patted on the head and called the team sharpshooter, and get reduced to being the placated sidekick, afterwards. There is no way that Lance is going to accept Keith as the new leader of Voltron sitting down, and considering how it looks like we’re all going to have to stomach a Kallura romance, there’s no way he isn’t going to be annoyed that the woman he’s been trying to impress for the past two seasons is in love with his rival. There is also the question of his homesickness, which is not something that can be resolved as easily. It seems to be affecting him the most, and I’m curious as to whether his desire to see his family again will prompt him to act against the team’s interest. Considering how his love for his family serves as a foil to the orphan Keith's own ideals of sacrificing familial bonds for the greater good, I'm curious as to whether his insensitivity regarding the subject will be another cause of resentment for Lance, who may feel irritated Keith doesn't understand what he's going through, especially when you think about how he's faced with the opportunity to reconnect with his galra half in space. Becoming an antagonist (even a temporary one) might be a good way to explore this inner conflict as it reaches it’s boiling point, and develop his character, without reducing him to a comic-relief cockblock.
  • Me: I bet he’d look sexy in a Galra uniform

anonymous asked:

53 andreil for the prompt thingy???

53: “Darling, stop.” 

They’re in the chilly fluorescent produce section, Neil steering the cart and Andrew catching it whenever he finds chocolate-covered berries or cartons of blended sugary juice to add to the pile. Neil’s got his old jersey conspicuously clashing with their new team’s red sweats, a dark bandana twisted up in his hair. It’s almost closing, and everything feels a bit cool and loose like no one’s really supposed to be awake.

When Neil’s busy bagging carrots Andrew gets his arms folded over the handle of the shopping cart, this stupid black t-shirt all stretched out at the neck, wire-framed glasses perched on his nose, mouth flat. Neil’s sort of fond of Andrew wearing his glasses in public, and he finds himself walking backwards in front of the cart as it’s pushed, openly watching him. Andrew picks the pace up just enough to bump heavily into his shins.

Neil smiles, looping his fingers through his end of the cart so they each have a side, rolling lopsidedly towards the opening of an aisle.

“Stop making things difficult.”

“Let me drive the cart.”

Andrew regards him, fair eyebrows raised. “You’re a control freak.”

Neil laughs, startled. “You let three people total drive your car. You wouldn’t even let Sir or King in our bed for the first three months we had them. You bartered for my secrets when we met, Andrew. ”

“And?” Andrew asks, examining a box of cake mix.

“I don’t think you should be talking about controlling personalities.”

Andrew ignores him, tossing the box in the cart and pushing it back towards Neil. “Go get your diet plan shit.”

Neil makes a face. “It’s our diet plan.”

“I am not willfully drinking skimmed milk.” Andrew crosses to the bags of jumbo marshmallows and Neil pinches the bridge of his nose.

“I’ll put it in your hot chocolate.”

“You’ll die,” Andrew says simply.

Neil jostles the cart into Andrew’s side, and he drops the marshmallows back on the shelf, unimpressed. “Meet me at the front in five. I’m getting actual food to sustain actual people.”

Andrew shrugs and turns to wander out of the aisle, dragging the cart the wrong way behind him.

Neil coughs so he doesn’t laugh, senselessly thrilled. He jogs back towards the meat section, threading through coolers and displays until he finds the turkey bacon and lean chicken breasts that they live on. He’s frowning at an especially lifeless beige cut of fish when he’s wrenched around by the arm.

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zimbits au wherein a run in with the lax bros leads to a run in with jack

Eric’s walking down the street, latte in one hand and phone in the other, only a very little bit lost on his spontaneous scenic detour to the library. He’s halfway through composing a tweet when several air-horns blast in his direction at once.

He swears, jumps about a mile out of his skin, and drops both his coffee and his phone.

The coffee, sadly, goes up before it comes down, and manages to splash all over his front before spilling across his shoes too. He quickly retrieves his phone from the pavement before it’s similarly attacked by the travelling coffee, and checks it over for damage. He sighs out when he sees it’s only a little scratched on the side of the case, and presses a palm to his chest to try and calm the furious beating of his heart.

He looks over to the house across the way, out of which several, men—actually, boys, Eric’s going to call them after that stunt—are laughing at him, and high-fiving each other. Eric flushes and screws his lips together, telling himself not to cry in front of them, not to give them the satisfaction.

“Hey! Dickfaces!”

Eric looks behind him to see a moustached man flipping the bird to the boys in the house across the street.

“Fuck off to your basement of inadequacy and wine coolers, you absolute shitfuckers.”

The boys don’t take his advice, but rather, blast their air-horns again which causes Eric to hunch up his shoulders.

“Hey, brah, you alright?” The man walks up to Eric and looks him over. “Shit, dude. They got you good.”

Eric sighs out, trying to keep his composure. “It’s alright. Thanks for telling them off.”

“Fucking LAX bros. I live for telling them off. Come on inside and I’ll help you clean up.”

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BTS Reacts - Running Fingers Through Their Hair

Kim Namjoon: Namjoon has fallen asleep on your shoulder while the two of you were watching a movie. He mumbles in his sleep, twitching every so often as if his body felt unsettled from a day’s worth of activity. In order to relax him, you comb your fingers through his short, purple hair, moving in long, extended rows. He smiles, easing his body into yours, immeasurably calm. It’s not often that he gets time alone with you, but when he does, he’s so gratified by how tender you are with your affections. He would refuse to budge for ages. When you try to get up to make dinner, he interrupts you as soon as your hands stop moving, groaning as he tells you not to leave his side.

“Mmm… don’t stop… dinner can wait a couple more hours.”

Park Jimin: Jimin has been so exhausted lately that he falls asleep on your shoulder while talking, backstage. Gently, you lower his head onto your lap. You run your fingers through his hair, tugging lightly on the soft strands closer to his forehead. His eyes gradually open - he almost forgets that the both of you are in public. Jimin would get shy very quickly, and shoot up in a heartbeat - he likes when you play with his hair, but he doesn’t want any undesired attention from staff and fans from your public display of affection. He’d definitely want to continue this later, when the two of you aren’t under scrutiny from the masses. He’s pulled away by duty, but before he leaves, he says:

“Ah, I haven’t slept that well in awhile… sorry I have to leave so soon. Do you want to come by the dorm later - when we have more privacy?”

Min Yoongi: When you smooth the tangles in Min Yoongi’s hair, running the tips of your fingers against his skin while doing so, it sends shivers down his spine. He’s had a lot of worrying thoughts running through his head lately, so he would appreciate any distraction given to him, especially one as delicate and as loving as you. His eyes are locked onto your reflection in the mirror before him. The sight of you relaxes him; your touch is an overdose of serenity. The hairdressers have just finished with his look, and you’re given the consent to ruffle it. You massage his head, fingers buried in his dark hair, this feels so surreal. He moans before turning serious:

“… You’re too good at this. Have been so close to any other person before?”
( You shake your head. )
“Okay. Keep it that way.”

Kim Taehyung: Taehyung is getting the usual case of over-excitement from being backstage for too long. He’s restlessly hopping from group to group, eager to be paid attention to like a child hosting his birthday party. When he spots you in the distance, he rushes up to you, giggling madly, hoping you would join him in his elation. You simply tell him to sit down with you - he complies, and as soon as your hands reach his hair, he turns quiet and composed. He stays motionless and silent, only because you’re doing what you’re doing. Even when Bangtan speaks to him, he simply nods, all too focused on your tranquilizing caresses through his auburn hair. You’ve successfully tamed the beast - when he’s ready to perform, he turns to you with a poised air of confidence.

“I’ll be back for more later, so make sure you hang around.”

Kim Seokjin: Jin seems to be on edge for most of the time he’s getting prettied up by make-up artists, especially since he’ll be performing a new dance routine. While the artists worked their magic on the idol, you play with his flaxen locks, curling them with your fingers as you watched him in the mirror, placating his unease. He can’t help but thank his lucky stars that you’re always there to help him unwind. Sometimes, he’d feign restlessness, just to get you to run your fingers through his hair; he really just wants you to be close by. He gets up from his seat with a lazy look in his eyes, but he doesn’t hesitate to charm you with his dashing good looks as soon as he is able.

“Aish, you’ve made me so relaxed, I’m not sure I’m ready to perform! Does my hair still look good?”

Jung Hoseok: Hobi usually doesn’t sleep in, but when he wakes up next to you brushing his hair with your fingers, he’s tempted to drop everything and take the day off. He has practice with Bangtan in an hour, but you’ve made it a lot harder for him to leave. There’s nothing more soothing to him than having you subconsciously stroke his head of hair. He’s basically in heaven right now, and there’s little chance he’d come back down to Earth unless you truly insisted that he leave for practice, which was only the right thing to do, you thought. He looks up at you, clearly hesitant to stop the groove of your fingers as they moved softly against his scalp.

“I’ll just tell them I’m sick. I want to stay here forever.”
( You urge him to go, or he’ll be late. )
“Okay, okay… five more minutes.” 

Jeon Jungkook: Kook used to not mind sitting next to his members during long car rides. However, that changed when he met you. As soon as Bangtan gets in the van, he pushes his way past his hyungs and books a spot next to you. Midway through the journey, you find your fingers grazing against the skin on his head; he’s falling asleep on your shoulder. He’s no stranger to people brushing through his hair, but there’s something about the way you do it that steadies the beating of his heart. Kook is so used to the feel of your hands; you’ve spoiled him for anyone else. They hit a rest stop, but before you can head to bathroom, you feel his fingers clutch onto your wrist. 

“I’m so used to falling asleep with you touching my hair, that I can’t whenever you’re not around anymore. So, don’t move seats when you get back.”


I hope you like this fluffy scenario-ish react, anon! <3

Okikagu Headcanons

  1. Kagura and Sougo get super competitive for their anniversary and everyone thinks it’s super dumb because they get so aggressive but it’s literally about who loves each other more?? And who knows who better??? 
  2. Sougo is super touchy. Like he loves to just grab Kagura and squish their cheeks together to be annoying but also because she’s just super huggable and he thinks that guy is giving her looks that are just A LITTLE too friendly 
  3. Kagura doesn’t get jealous. Like at all. She knows she’s a catch!! (But there was an incident with a Shinsengumi fangirl that no one talks about anymore)
  4. Sougo and Kagura are salt mates. They put on dramas and reality TV shows after a long day and just throw popcorn at the screen and make snarky comments
  5. They’re the definition of “yeah he/she’s a shit head but only I can say that, wanna fight??!” 
  6. When Sougo’s had a particularly hard and bloody fight as a cop, he comes home looking broken and he doesn’t have to say anything because Kagura just knows and gently pulls him into her chest and just strokes his hair and presses kisses on his forehead
  7. They have a huge family once they’re ready to have kids and to Sougo’s utter horror they all DIE for their Uncle Toshi and just love him so much and Kagura almost cries with laughter 
  8. Sougo learns to cook to make Kagura happy and he’s actually really good
  9. The quality of their sparring decreases significantly because they just make out in between punches because fighting turns them on like the losers they are 
  10. They never try to downplay their love and everybody who meets them knows they’re really in love in their own unique way 
Steven Quartz Universe: More powerful than he knows

When Steven was first introduced to the show, he appeared to be adorable kid with some really finicky and unreliable powers. His caretakers, the crystal gems, bore the bulk of the responsibility when it came to fighting gem monsters and other gems like Jasper. However, as Steven is coming into his own, and his powers become more controllable, it’s slowly but steadily being hinted at that he is far more powerful than the crystal gems, homeworld, or even himself realizes. 

I’m not just talking about things like physical strength or even his shield, although they are both quite valuable assets, but rather I’m talking about powers he hasn’t even been able to fully explore yet. Still, lets talk about his more obvious abilities before delving into his potentials later. 

First and probably most underestimated power of his is his super strength. Steven started out being only stronger than the average human, but as time has gone on there has been a slew of evidence to suggest that he can exert several tons of force quite effortlessly. Evidence for this includes him kicking metal doors in and tossing huge slabs of stone from a temple with a punch of his fist (AFTER he was bodied into the stone hard enough to create a crater). While he is probably still on the weaker end when it comes to Quartz, his strength is noticeable to other gems now as evidenced by the Wanted Special. I would not be surprised if his physical prowess finds itself having an upgrade sooner rather than later. 

His floating powers also have a lot of potential to it. One only needs to watch a few kung fu flicks with high flying wire fu to know that characters who can fight AND float can be quite the badasses in combat. 


However awesome as those movies are however, Steven’s version of floating is actually more effective. While your usual high flying fantasy kung fu movie has its characters only getting lighter when they hop around, Steven’s ability to float is far sturdier than that. 

While other floating powers make you lighter, Steven’s is more akin to flight that only pushes upwards like a hot air balloon. the crystal gems could not force him down because the force he was exerting to keep himself aloft was stronger than the downward forces they were putting on him. A boat about that size is usually 2400 pounds from what I could find online, add onto that whatever weight the gems bring to the table and the fact that he’s holding that boat by his arms, and its fair to say that his floating and strength abilities are quite strong. He’s also been learning to use momentum before activating his ability to travel over distances. The greater control he has over his emotional state, the more nuanced his control of this ability is going to get. 

His shield and bubble powers are pretty self explanatory. They are quite durable, especially his shield, and they seem to be able to counter a wide variety of Gem weaponry of all shapes and sizes, including on freaking spaceships. In terms of defenses, you can’t get much better than Steven’s shield. 

Another defensive ability even his mother didn’t have was a resistance to Destabilizers 

While his form appears to be at least partially Hard Light in composition, the majority of himself is organic, which destabilizers do not account for. As such that type of weaponry, while it would hurt, does not really affect him the way it would a pure gem. 

However, all of this is only talking about Steven’s personal capabilities in a fight. It does not address his most powerful abilities of all. The power to create and maintain an entire army. This is encompassed into his “healing ability,” however the applications for this power are quite staggering.  

His first foray into army making was unintentionally creating an entire species of sapient watermelons. Doesn’t sound all that impressive at first, until you realize he was able to create this army from ONE WATERMELON. Each and everyone of them inclined to be loyal to him and fight for him to their end. Rose also established that this ability can extend to any and all flora. Moss to Trees can be made into an army of loyal soldiers which can in turn breed MORE of their kind. If he spent a single day just spitting out a variety of seeds he’d have an entire militia over night. Anyone who has seen the march of the Ents from Lord of the Rings would know that this power is quite formidable indeed. 


Yeah, Steven could create THAT if he wanted to, and it wouldn’t even be that hard. While they individually wouldn’t be as strong as a quartz gem, they would be a formidable force in numbers. 

However, he’s had another power that has been revealed that is even more formidable than his flora soldiers. 

Pink Fauna: While Steven can create flora soldiers, his ability to raise creatures back from the dead and bestow on them tactically advantageous powers through his tears is quite possibly one of his strongest powers. These beings are given powers like enhanced strength, longevity, lack of a need to eat, the ability to walk on water, portals made through intense yelling (as far as we know), and most vital of all, the ability to create a pathway into a pocket dimension that can connect planets over billions of light years. It appears this can be done with any type of fauna on the planet, including humans as shown with Lars. Rose also displayed an ability to placate and tame creatures like Lions, so if Steven were interested, he could easily go about acquiring other creatures in this manner, such as Gorillas, Bears, Tigers, and more. Having intensely loyal, super strong beings with interconnected portals to each other is a tactical advantage that would be quite silly to pass up. 


Steven would need to be sad enough about their death to cry about it however, so it would require creating a relationship with said creatures, but its completely doable. This also means anyone in Beach City whom he is close enough with could become a potential Pink Soldier for him. Sadie in particular is already strong as a human, so making her into one would be pretty advantageous should she meet an untimely end (plus she’d be with Lars, so that’s a thing). 

Beyond that, there is one more power he’ll be needing to develop over the course of the next season or so. 

Healing corrupted Gems: 

Not only could Steven turn the plants and animals on earth into an intensely loyal army for him, he’s on the precipice of gaining the ability to heal corrupted gem monsters. Being able to do this would create brand new crystal gems who would be very thankful for Steven and VERY miffed against homeworld for condemning them to thousands of years of being monsters to be hunted and rounded up by Garnet Amethyst and Pearl.  

They have a lot, and I do mean a LOT of potential recruits once Steven acquires this power. 

Once again, all of what I am stating here is things that Steven can do VERY quickly provided he is in the right emotional state to do so. If he put his mind to it, Steven could fundamentally change the ecosystem of the entire planet Easily within a week to a month. All he’d have to do is use the warp pads and seed all the different kinds of plants in the area and develop relationships with candidates for being Pink Soldiers and the whole world would be his very easily. Not that Steven is the world conquering type, but if it means him developing a strong enough force to fight off a gem invasion maybe he’d do it. 

So in conclusion, Steven is a ton more powerful than he or others give him credit for. If he weren’t such a nice kid, he’d have probably taken over the planet by now. 

anonymous asked:

consider this for a prompt: the team is in the lounge, post practice, just lazing around and doing nothing; the tv is on; no one is really paying attention when andrew suddenly turns rigid; deep breaths; unfocused eyes; the reporter is relaying a shocking revelation about a man abusing the foster kids in his care; hisfacehisfacehisfacetheyareshowinghisface (-i cannot tell why my mind is such an angsty bitch but here we are)

(this is a specific and excellent prompt and I’ve been anxiously awaiting its place in line <3)

He’s boneless when he climbs out of the shower, feet tender on the glossy tile, breath sitting high and tight in his chest. Neil likes pacing through his routine after practice, adrenaline relaxing its grip on him finger by finger, change-rooms echoing and empty. He strings his wet hair up in a fresh bandana and shrugs his armbands up over flushed, shower-damp forearms. He lets the practice pull at his muscles and drafts new line-ups and drills in his head.

His teammates are back in the lounge, dotting the furniture, all of their aggression leached out of them, and he feels joy rip his chest like popped stitches. Good feelings are always more brutal than bad ones, he’s come to understand. Stronger, harsher.

He gets a round of raised hands and snappy greetings when he walks in, mostly lost in the rustle of plastic bags as Wymack and Abby unload sandwiches onto an overcrowded table.

Wymack licks stray sauce off of his thumb and points at Neil with his other hand. “Come pretend you’re civilized and eat at the table. I don’t want ranch on my couches again.”

Neil shrugs and pulls a chair out at the head of the table. Matt winks up at him, and the rest of the foxes pass wrapped and pressed sandwiches down the line. They chat and rustle, Aaron snaps for serviettes until Wymack smacks his hand away, Kevin eats his sandwich with a knife and fork. Everything smells like tangy pesto and sweet fresh bread.

“Get Andrew over here, will you?” Wymack asks distractedly. Neil glances over at Andrew, installed on the couch with his back towards them. His hair has been bleaching in the sun recently, and he’s easily the brightest thing in the room.

“Andrew,” he calls, accepting his own sandwich when it’s waved in front of him, distracted from the back of Andrew’s head.

“You really put an effort in,” Nicky teases, rolling his eyes.

“I’m not moving him if he doesn’t want to be moved,” Neil replies, unconcerned. His food is warm in his hands, chicken and cranberries and cheese peeking out of brown bread and wax wrapping.

“That’s bullshit,” Matt says, mouth full. “You know you could.”

“I don’t know why you still think I have that kind of power.”

“Uhh maybe because he does impossible favours for you? And like. Kisses your face when we’re not looking? I dunno, just a thought,” Dan says sarcastically, peeling onions out of her sandwich.

“Andrew,” Neil repeats, exasperated. When he looks over again Andrew hasn’t moved, fixed and steady as always. His shoulders are moving fast though, breath coming hard enough that Neil can hear it from across the room. His stomach throbs, intuitive and scared. 

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@hello-shellhead @saved-by-the-notepad I might’ve written you guys something


“This is not a good idea,” Natasha said immediately, Clint and Steve nodding along with her. “Clint and I are much better trained, and Tony is too recognizable.”

“I understand that,” Fury said with a sigh. “But this mission needs Stark’s expertise. We’re just going to have to hope he can keep his mouth shut for once.” He shot a one-eyed glare in the billionaire’s direction, who in turn shrugged.

“I’m up for it. Don’t worry about it, it’ll be easy.” He shot a smile around at his anxious teammates, which only seemed to worry them more.

The mission itself was easy enough. Infiltrate a party, get some blue prints, erase some data, destroy some technology. Easy, he did that after Obie often enough, although to be fair he was doing it to his own company, so it didn’t have to go quite so unnoticed.

The others didn’t seem to have much faith in him, but that was fine. People underestimating him was just the way he liked the world. Fury dismissed them and Tony went back to the tower to prepare. Nice suit, but cheap by his standards. Slicked back hair in contrast to his usual unruly curls. Repulsor watch – no way he was going in unarmed, he wasn’t stupid. He stared at himself in the mirror. Still too recognizable. Sighing, he resigned himself to the fact that he would have to do it: he was going to have to shave his glorious goatee.

The mission went smoothly, despite many people who had personally met Tony Stark being in attendance at the party. No one gave him a second glance; some people thought he was a waiter, and Tony cursed himself for wearing a suit that was too cheap. He was in and out in two hours, everything completely under control. He was just strolling out of the building when he heard someone shouting about destroyed prototypes and smiled to himself, whistling.

Apparently his ‘disguise’ worked too well, because when he got back to SHIELD headquarters he had about four guns pointed at his head and several very angry agents glaring at him and asking just who the fuck he was and what he thought he was doing.

“Uh, Tony here guys. Finished the mission, saved the day?” he answered as he held his hands up in surrender, trying to placate them. They didn’t believe him.

He was unceremoniously (“HEY, genius over here, check your strength!”) thrown into an interrogation room, where he sighed and pulled the drive he had obtained for Fury out of his pocket, setting it on the table. Hill entered about fifteen minutes later, which was good because he was getting bored and contemplating messing with the monitoring system in the room, and he shot her a big smile.

“Agent Hill! So good to see you. You proud of me yet? I know you didn’t believe I could pull it off.” He smirked, but his face fell at her cold and blank stare.

“I don’t know you,” she responded in monotone. “I don’t know what you’re pulling, pretending to be Stark-”

“I’m not pulling anything!” he protested quickly, holding his hands up again and standing, like he was waiting to be attacked. “I am Stark! Listen, call Pepper, show her a picture, she’ll tell you. Jesus, all I did was shave!” Hill glared at him and he fell silent again, anxiously reminding himself that if he stepped back it would be a sign of weakness and women loved signs of weakness. She turned on her heel and walked out without another word, and he fell back into his seat. He felt exhausted. The mission hadn’t been hard, but had taken longer than he thought it would, and he wanted to go home and work.

It took another hour before someone entered the room again, and by that point he was standing on the chair in the corner of the room, dissecting the camera that was watching him with the small screwdriver he had in his pocket and ingenuity. He glanced over his shoulder as Pepper strode in, lighting up and jumping down from the chair quickly, noting Hill and Fury standing behind her.

“Pep, my love, the spice of my life!” he said dramatically, throwing his arms wide. “Tell the Pirate that he should be able to recognize his agents better.”

“That’s Tony,” Pepper said with a long-suffering sigh, ignoring him. “He looks like a child without his facial hair, but it’s him. I didn’t believe it either the first time I saw him, until Obie-” She cut herself off quickly and shot him an apologetic look, but he just shrugged, clapping a hand on Fury and Hill’s shoulders.

“Now that that’s sorted, can we debrief and go home?”

Apologies were made, but Tony waved them away. It wasn’t the first time this had happened, and probably wouldn’t be the last. Even the paparazzi didn’t recognize him without his distinctive and awesome goatee getup, which was nice sometimes.

It was a couple months and a few missions later when it happened again. Fury and Hill were out on their own recon mission, Pepper was in Tokyo and couldn’t be reached, and Rhodey was out on deployment for the next few weeks and no help anyway (he would probably just find it hilarious and leave Tony in the lurch). It didn’t matter how many times Tony showed up from completed missions missing his glorious goatee, the agents of SHIELD apparently had terrible facial recognition because he was always detained and interrogated.

It had been hours and lots of yelling before Tony finally got fed up. “You people are insufferable!” he shouted, grabbing a Sharpie from the agent’s pocket and turning to the one-way mirror on the wall, scribbling on his face in a rough approximation of something that looked like his normal goatee. “There! Recognize me now?”

Clint found it absolutely hilarious. There were photos.

Somehow a picture of Tony with Sharpie stains and a wide grin got leaked to the media, and the rage was now “Tony Stark look-alike?!” which Tony found absolutely hysterical.

He managed to convince half of SHIELD that it really was just a look-alike, while the other half remained sceptical. Suddenly, whenever he stepped into headquarters he had ghosts trailing him with razors (and not very good ghosts, either, Fury should get Natasha and Clint up here for some lessons). Bruce found it very amusing to help him prank said ghost, which one time included locking them in the bathroom and filling said bathroom with bubbles. And whenever Tony did show up from a mission where he’d shaved, he was met with a multitude of stares. Fury even got in on the action and started calling him ‘Agent Carbonell,’ which was funny in its own way.

And if he managed to trick Steve as well a couple times, well, that was a whole different story.  

“Come on, big guy, you have to come out sooner or later,” Stiles was begging at this point. Was it ironic that the human in this situation was the one begging for attention? Probably. Will Stiles mention that to Derek? No, because he values keeping his face intact.

For all his placation and begging, all he gets is a solid huff from the wolf currently hogging all of his bedding.

He had come home like any other day, dropping his backpack with a much too heavy thud when he had found the wolf sized lump curled on his bed. He had to admit, the first few times this had happened - he cooed and ‘ahh’ed at the werewolf who had taken to finding comfort in the ode de Stilinski. Now? Not so much. 

Sure, Stiles’ heart melted every time he witnessed Derek’s in full shift and tried not to break the magic of how much more tactile the man became when less hindered by his human shape. But this was the third time this week Stiles would be remaking his bed for non-jizz related reasons and that shit took effort. Not even being chased by monsters winded him quite as much as getting a fitted sheet on his mattress did.

“Der, you can’t just hide in my covers forever.”

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Happy Birthday Hailey

It’s the wonderful @victuurificrec aka Hailey’s birthday today! She does an incredible amount for the fandom and if you don’t know her blog, I suggest you definitely check it out asap. She puts a huge amount of effort into everything that she does and she’s been an incredible supporter of my fic for a long time. So to say thank you and Happy Birthday to Hailey, here’s a little birthday themed Viktuuri ficlet to show my appreciation. 

Happy Birthday! xx



“So, you’re telling me that all this panic is just because you can’t decide what to get Viktor for his birthday?” Phichit asked disbelievingly.

Yuuri groaned, resting his head in his free hand as he clutched his phone with the other. It was stupid, he knew. Calling Phichit in a panic after almost a full week of constant worrying and doubt over something that Viktor probably wouldn’t even care much about but he couldn’t help himself.

“I’ve been living with him for a year Phichit. We’ve been together for even longer. Last year he told me he didn’t really celebrate much but this year it’s different. We’ve been together too long for me to not give him something, I just don’t know what.”

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Temptation (M)

A one-shot for a lovely anon. Enjoy it mate ;)

Moodboard

Jungkook and Reader

Genre: Werewolf! Jungkook, smut

Word count: 4,126 words

~•~•~•~

Bang. Bang. Bang.

“Jungkook!”

No answer.

BANG. BANG. BANG.

“Jungkook!”

Still no answer. You didn’t care that an old lady walking behind you gave you a very dirty look before shuffling down the corridor to her own apartment. It was only the manners instilled by your parents that stopped you from shooting daggers right back at her.

BANG! BANG! BANG!

“JEON JUNGKOOK! Open the fucking door right now or I -”

Your shouts as well as your fist froze in mid-air when the door whipped open to reveal the man whose name you’d been yelling at the top of your lungs.

“Why the hell are you banging my door down?” Jungkook’s frown and his tone told you that he was irritated, which fueled your anger even more. He had no right to be annoyed at you after the shit he had put you through today.

“Why weren’t you at work?” You managed to lower your volume now that there wasn’t a door separating the two of you, but you made sure that he knew how angry you were.

“I took a day off, but I’m sure you could have gotten that information from the HR.”

His flippant answer didn’t impress you one bit. “You know that isn’t what I’m talking about.”

“Then what are you talking about?” The question came out sounding incredulous, but you didn’t miss the uncomfortable shuffling of the guilty man. He knew what you were talking about. Before you could point it out, however, a high-pitched woman’s voice called from inside his apartment.

“Who’s at the door, babe? Come back to bed, I can’t wait anymore!”

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Ok but fairies don’t like iron so clearly Irn Bru was created as a modern urban solution to Scotland’s fairy problem.

I mean think about it, very few stories have cropped up of people being taken by the Good Neighbours since the late nineteenth century which coincides with the rise of popular health tonics like iron brews, while the precursor to THE Irn Bru was brought out in 1901. 

This ALSO coincides with the lifetimes of individuals such as Andrew Lang (who of course published a version of Robert Kirk’s Secret Commonwealth, and Kirk was one of those reputed to have been taken by the fairies) and the prominence of Victorian cutesy fairy tradition may have brought public attention to very real, malevolent and not particularly cutesy human-fairy issues in the contemporary world, sparking an effort to end abductions.

The Good Neighbours cannot have been particularly happy about this, not least because it’s status as ‘Scotland’s Other National Drink’ threatened the position of their own invention, whisky, from which they still draw massive revenues (because obviously Scotch whisky is supernatural, how else would it be the best, and it is well-known that those who imbibe have a greater chance of seeing the Fair Folk). Various attempts to placate fairy distillers have taken place over the years however, and to bring the two communities together, with much greater success since devolution and the founding of the Scottish parliament (the fairy community being considered an embarrassment and marker of backwardness by the Scots at the time of the Act of Union, so attempts were made to hide them from Westminster, though not always successfully). 

One particularly prominent symbol of improved relations between the communities is the famous snowman Christmas advert, conceived as a metaphor for human and fairy cooperation (the snowman being animated by magic, though hiding behind the conventional Christmas imagery of Raymond Briggs’ classic). However it has been an established principle in Scots law since at least 1946 that humans who have taken regular doses of irn bru are off-limits and unable to be “invited” to the fairy world without fully understanding what they’d got into (whisky drinkers are plainly related to ancient bardic traditions and thus much more likely to go looking for such experiences than the sober), thus lessening the chance of nasty diplomatic situations. 

Drink your irn bru kids, unless you want to be taken by the fairies