pirates swoop

The Tamora Pierce Ladies When You Piss Them Off
  • Alanna of Pirate's Swoop and Olau: MEET ME IN THE GODDAMN PIT, BITCH. SQUARE THE FUCK UP, WE GOING!!! *unsheaths sword and proceeds to kick your ass*
  • Keladry of Mindalen: *Will kick your ass with a stony expression... if you're even worth the trouble to her*
  • Daine the Wildmage: Excuse me while I ressurect zombie dinosaurs to wreck your shit and also ally myself with every cat, rat, and dog in the city so that you are powerless against me... and did I mention I am a hyena in this scenario?
  • Dove: Aly, for god’s sakes –
  • Aly: No Dove, please I beg of you, will you just shut your beautiful pie hole. Just sit there, let me stare at you, while you silently support me on this game plan.
  • Dove: Aly –
  • Aly: Shhhhh, Dove, your quiet support means the world to me, as well as your tacit endorsement of all my behaviors.
Tortallan heroines sorted into hogwarts houses

Alanna is clearly a gryffindor. Brave, idealistic, fond of slaying literal and/or metaphorical monsters.

Daine is a ravenclaw. Curious, intellectually hungry, once stopped her heartbeat to listen to whales.

Kel is a hufflepuff. Loyal, hardworking, pragmatic. Mildly baffled when she gets recognition for doing something she considers her job.

Aly is a slytherin. Sly, clever, would never do something the normal way when she can do it a better way.

Beka is a little harder to pin down, but I think she’s a gryffindor at heart with hufflepuff methodology. She would like to be able to slay the world’s evils in one fell swoop, but knows she can’t. Instead she does her best to stop the small ones.

Why aren’t more books being turned into TV shows? Just look at how well Game of Thrones and True Blood and Sherlock Holmes adaptations are doing to see how successful that idea would be. Part of the problem with movies is that directors and producers want to put a different spin on the character, but there isn’t enough time so they put in their own lines and spin (DID YOU PUT YOUR NAME THE GOBLET rings a bell), but take out way too many of the character’s trait and end up ruining that character. This is also known as the Ginny Weasley effect.

Please give us the Harry Potter TV show where every character just wants an education but the Golden Trio keeps fucking shit up. Or, give us the next generation, the people who have to go back to Hogwarts after the Last Battle, the children who aren’t really children anymore, who’s scars are shown on their bodies and in their minds and now that they have their school back and struggle with normal everyday teenage issues like getting good grades and crushes and overbearing parents, but also recovering from an entire year fighting a guerrilla war against the Carrows and years of the terror of Voldemort looming over their head.

Give us the Pevensies ruling Narnia after 100 years of neglect and trying to turn the nation into something hospitable even though the oldest boy is only 14 years old and somehow they are expected to heal the damage the White Witch has wrought. Show them finding out Narnia is not alone, there are other nations out there and some are friendly. Some are not. Peter may be High King but the other 3 are still his Co-Rulers, and think of how much they argued in the books. That wouldn’t just magically disappear over time. It would probably increase if anything, the best way to govern, how to collect taxes, dealing with diplomatic and military affairs, and the list goes on and on. Just remember, Lucy wasn’t even ten when the series started. There’s also the matter of growing up and hormones and having crushes but still being rulers of an entire nation. I want to know how exactly the Golden Years of Narnia started.

Give us the Percy Jackson series and how campers have to deal with a new parent and new family and how their lives are upended and now they no longer know who is friend and foe but they still have to learn to trust someone. In the summer they might be around people who understand what they are going through but not in the school year, unless they are a year-rounder. Now that the two Big Prophecies are over, teenagers are going on more and more quests and some won’t make it home and they’re just kids, how do they deal with that? Show us half-bloods that may have the blood of Apollo running in their veins but they can’t sing for shit but they are really good at creating weapons or a child of Hermes who is one of the most genuine and honest beings at Camp Half-Blood because children don’t always end up like their parents. 

Give us Tamora Pierce and girls and boys in training to be mages or knights or Dogs all in one City in a medieval time period, or even a modern one. Or instead of Torall there’s Emelan, and show us stories of teenage ambient mages from Lightsbridge and Winding Circle basically going to a college for learning magic. Just think of all the TV shows focused on colleges and high schools and add magic. This certainly sounds fun to me. What about you? Or show us all of Alanna’s or Kel’s training. There was so much glossed over because there just wasn’t enough time to show everything. 4 years training as a page, another 4 as a squire for both. Alanna, who had to deal with all the pressures of knighthood and adolescence while disguised as another gender and the subsequent reveal. And then there’s Kel, who had to deal with years of hazing and prejudice for going after her dream just because she was a girl. If you think those issues wouldn’t strike a cord with some people then you are wrong.

Please start making them into TV shows, because I don’t just want my characters to have a few minutes of screen time. I want them to grow and develop and have a life of their own, but so often in movies they become unrecognizable in a matter of a few minutes and by the end of the process they are almost unrecognizable.

So give us TV shows instead, because I want to see how the other half lives, and so do millions of other people. And you can’t fully grasp that through movies.

My Alanna piece is up for grabs on my society 6 account!  

The Lioness Rampant series is an incredible series based on Alanna of Trebond, a girl who disguises herself as a boy in order to earn knighthood.  TLR is one of the few books i’ve encountered that actually acknowledges the changes that happen to a woman as she transitions from young girl into adulthood, and is an incredible story about a flawed character fighting to prove herself based on her skills and not her gender.  If you’re looking for a fun, action, fantasy novel, I recommend this series.

All of the Tortall books are fantastic, and i’m so thankful I read them when I did as a child.

*artist note: when you guys tag your reblogs, I adore you.  When you comment in the posts, I fangirl over you <3

Post- Trickster’s Queen, Aly is all settled in, working her spy master mojo for the raka, installed someplace permanently and married to Nawat.
New guards are sitting in a courtyard, gossiping unfavorably about Aly, Nawat, and/or Dove and Sarai. Don’t notice the trio of crows in the tree above them.
Crows fly off, about five minutes later Nawat comes sauntering around the corner, sits on the table where the guards are talking, pops elbows on knees, fists under chin, grins at guards.
“So I heard you were talking shit!”