pinky ring'

the freckle in the corner of dans eye and the one on phils collarbone is actually what keeps the clouds floating but thts just me

the signs as summers

ARIES  ∞ the humid summer: heat slipping sticky hands down the slope of your thighs// sweat collecting in your collarbones // ponytails and shirts pulled down over sunburns 

TAURUS  ∞ the tepid summer: clouds coming to gather over the lakeside// cabins and campfires// grass sliding slow through idle fingers 

GEMINI  ∞ the stormy summer: thunder threatening to crack the world in two// rain pelting the pavement, droplets lingering, sweet, on the overhang of your bottom lip// bathing suits soaked through and the air heavy with petrichor 

CANCER  ∞ the sleepy summer: ladybugs drowsing in your hair// blanket forts and bedtime stories// the crackle of the bonfire leaking lazily through the trees

LEO  ∞ the nostalgic summer: counting the constellation of scratches the season left you// polaroids strung like fairy lights across every corner of your room// sun-kissed cheeks that glow until December

VIRGO  ∞ the stable summer: part-time jobs and parties that last until the sun peeks back up over the trees// fingers laced through yours; hands smoothing sunscreen over your shoulder blades// beach towels and Frisbees that arc like shooting stars over your head

LIBRA  ∞ the aesthetic summer: white linens and lace// sundresses sweeping the curvature of your ankles// a sky freckled with stars

SCORPIO  ∞ the brazen summer: plunging necklines and nights that stretch til morning// kicking firecrackers across empty street corners// festivals that thrum through your body like a second heartbeat

SAGITTARIUS  ∞ the springlike summer: daisy crowns looped over the crest of your forehead// the air heavy with the smell of hyacinths// the sun draping itself over you like a quilt 

CAPRICORN  ∞ the renewing summer: hair trims and catching trains// the tide sucking the sand out from beneath your toes// convertible rides and laughter that that gets whisked away by the wind 

AQUARIUS  ∞ the adventurous summer: broken rules and hopped fences// counting passports like money// adrenaline beating inside you like a third lung

PISCESthe spiritual summer: smoke rooms and music festivals// fingers lazily laced together// connecting the stars with Sharpie// pinky swears and promise rings

Takaba as a cat...

Following mangakas on Twitter can be an entertaining thing at times because sometimes you get to see what inspires them or what they create while they’re just bored or doodling.. Yamane Ayano sensei is no exception and this time it’s all about cats - which is no surprise considering that she’s always posting pictures of her beloved neko-chans.. 

So, this was the inspiration. A retweet about the origin of organized crime boss cats. We know all too well that a cat is the popular choice of pet for any aspiring crime boss:



I suppose this got her to thinking about her own organized crime boss - Asami Ryuichi-sama! Of course, being a crime boss himself, why not have Asami pose with his own cat? The result - a very sultry-looking Asami with a cat.. complete with pinkie ring for effect! But something wasn’t quite right, which left her wondering “Hmm?”

ん?(´ω`)“:



I’m sure it was then that she realised that rather than having an actual cat, Asami already has a pet of his own! None other than that koneko-chan Takaba - complete with cat ears and a tail! Haha! She knew this was the perfect match since her response with this tweet was “This one!” And I guess it makes perfect sense since Takaba is the neko in this relationship, with Asami being the tachi!

これか!/(^o^)\“:



It’s nice when mangakas have fun with their creations and it’s even better when they share it with us! And I’m sure Asami would have no problem keeping this particular cat with him forever…

Source: https://twitter.com/yamaneayano

4

Cairo’s homosexuality posed one of the biggest obstacles to securing overall approval of the picture. Hammett didn’t mince words in the novel. “This guy is queer,” says Sam Spade’s secretary as she hands him an engraved card bearing his name - Mr Joel Cairo. He speaks in a “high-pitched thin voice,” carries “gaily colored silk handkerchiefs fragrant of chypre,” and walks in “mincing, bobbing steps.” … Hal Wallis realised that American audiences - not to mention the Hays Office - were not ready for a candid look at homosexuality, which traditionally drew laughs and jeers out front. 

After seeing Lorre’s first day’s work, Wallis dashed off a memo to Huston: “Don’t try and get a nancy quality into him, because if you do we will have trouble with the picture.” Huston bent to Breen’s will. In the scene, Effie presents Cairo’s calling card to a bemused Spade, who holds it to his nose.

“Gardenia,” says Effie.

“Quick, darling, in with him,” replies Spade.

The rest Huston left to Lorre’s subtlety and the viewer’s imagination.

The svelte 137-pound Lorre who stepped before the camera seemed younger, fitter, swifter. More was asked of him and he asked more of himself. The role was the best of its kind to come his way in years and Lorre knew it.

“I’d often shoot a scene with Peter and find it quite satisfactory, nothing more,” recalled Huston - 

But then I would see it on the screen in rushes and discover it to be far better than what I had perceived on the set. Some subtlety of expression was seen by the camera and recorded by the microphone that the naked eye and ear did not get. He’d be doing little things that the camera close on him would pick up that standing a few feet away you wouldn’t see. It was underplaying; it was a play that you would see if you were close to him, as a close-up, as a camera is close. Things would flicker there and burn up slightly, like a lamp, and then dim down, and come on again. You’re watching something as if it were in motion.

from The Lost One: A Life of Peter Lorre -Stephen D Youngkin

Sign Language and Shatt

-Matt is hard of hearing and Shiro is willing to learn ASL so they spend the months to Kerberos learning signs

-Sam also is HOH and helps with the learning, but he lets Matt have his fun

-(this backfires bc sometimes Matt will teach Shiro the wrong signs just to fuck with him)

-Matt can read lips so he makes a great teacher

-when they met matt was too distracted by shiro’s General Everything to focus on processing words and just weakly signed HANDSOME (rub a hand on one side of the face and then the other)

-(shiro: do i have something on my face?)

-it takes a little while, but Shiro finally learns enough to communicate

-The first time Shiro really uses ASL is on a mission with Pidge

-Shiro and Pidge are stealth mode and Shiro tries to sign directions to Pidge

-This backfires when Pidge realizes Matt taught Shiro some wrong words and that Shiro accidentally signed some curse words instead of actual words

-She fixed his vocabulary later

-when they reunite matt is injured and Dying and sees shiro and just weakly signs HANDSOME

-they get matt into a healing pod and shiro over-analyzes everything and yet somehow does not come to the conclusion that matt thinks he’s handsome

-Lance knows some Cuban Sign Language and when matt finds out he makes lance teach him

-keith and shiro, watching: wow our crushes are so smart
lance and matt, signing: wow our crushes are so cute

-lance: hey buddy if you keep rubbing your face like that you’ll get acne
pidge: that’s the sign for handsome
shiro and matt: (blush)

-pretty much everyone on the castle learns at least a little but not all of them are very good

-allura would rather have a hologram monster maul her than sign camping 27 times

Bonus! -Shiro’s sign for Matt is his hand moving around his face in a grabbing motion (the sign BEAUTIFUL) but with his hand formed in a fist  with his thumb in his hand and poking out between his pinkie and ring finger (the sign for M aka Matt) followed by his index and middle finger pressed together, resting on his nose after he finishes BEAUTIFUL, and moving from the tip of his nose to the top (the sign NERD)

-Matt’s sign for Shiro is both hands resting on his chest, with his middle fingers pressed to his heart and shaping a heart (the sign for a cartoon-y heart) and then the hands move more towards his shoulders and move outwards into fists (the sign STRONG)

-alternately, both will refer to the other with their hands flat, fingers pressed together, the pointer facing their chins, and waving it outwards away from the chin (the sign for BITCH :P)

(I’m not deaf (yet, I’m losing my hearing and will be partially if not completely deaf by 30) but I’m learning ASL and deaf culture and would love to hear anyone else’s input on this! Also I asked a couple HOH people about this, so don’t worry, I’ve done my research)

Fuck Away the Pain

Originally posted by luhan-vevo

A/N:…I don’t know why I keep writing smut. I- I can’t control myself.

Warnings: Cheating, Rough(ish) sex, Thigh riding, (Light)Choking, Dirty talk, Orgasm Denial, Cumplay, ya know, the typical stuff

~Admin Allie

Two forty-nine,” was all you said under your breath when you realized that Sehun hadn’t come home. You just knew he was with her, the person he called his business partner. But it was so obvious that she was more than that. The way they exchanged smirks over business dinners or greeted one another “unexpectedly” while you two were on a date always seemed so off. You would have given Sehun props if he had managed to keep it on the low, but he managed to think that you were actually that fucking dumb.  

You picked up your phone and dialed her number. He had the nerve to tell you that you should become friends with her. The closer you got to her, the more she smelled like a homewrecker that was out for the man you no longer claimed for yourself.

Keep reading

mythover  asked:

Hey there love your blog. Quick question I'm trying to write a fanasty book where one of the main characters use both swords & guns. A katana on his left hip & a short katana on his right aswell as carrying a desert eagle on his person but he lives in a world where technology & magic exist except firearms are illegal. Is it possible to write scene's where this combintaion works?

The “short katana” would be a wakizashi. It’s a distinct weapon in its own right and was traditionally part of a samurai’s accoutrements, though this is probably the least significant issue here.

The combination works in so far as you remember that real people make really horrible decisions in an attempt to seem cool. The Desert Eagle is a very flashy, somewhat terrible, gun. You carry one as an aesthetic choice, not because you want to actually kill someone with it. It’s big, bulky, unreasonably heavy, and stupidly expensive. The only point to owning one is to say, “look at what a badass I could be.”

The katana is a very flashy, somewhat terrible, sword. Stop me if this one sounds familiar; this is a sword you carry as an aesthetic choice, not because you actually want to kill someone with it, but because you want to say, “look at what a badass I could be.”

In both cases you’re talking about items that present the concept of a weapon far more valuable, lethal, and cool, than the real articles offer. With the katana, there’s also all of the associated cultural baggage. The katana is, literally, a holy symbol in Shinto. If your character is carrying one for religious reasons, that’s one thing; but, if they’re looking for “the best sword,” then, it’s a terrible choice.

It’s also probably worth pointing out that both the Desert Eagle and the katana require two hands to wield properly. Desert Eagles have a “floating mag,” meaning the magazine remains somewhat loose in the grip, while locked. If the operator fails to properly stabilize the pistol, this can result in the pistol failing to feed, meaning it won’t properly load the next round into the chamber, and forcing the user to cycle the slide manually. This isn’t an issue if you’re using the pistol as designed, but if you’re trying to fire it one handed, because your other hand is occupied with a katana, it could easily result in a dead man’s click long before the magazine is empty.

There’s a similar issue with the katana, the design works with the idea that the wielder will be using it with both hands. Specifically you use your index and middle ring and pinky finger on your off-hand to control the blade, while using your main hand for power. The problem with wielding one single handed should be immediately obvious; you can flail around with it, but you can’t really get much value from it that way. At that point, you’d almost be better off with a machete, simply because it would offer a more comfortable grip, and would be easier to swing.

While wakizashi are frequently matched with a katana and sold together, they’re not intended for simultaneous use. The wakizashi had distinct uses, mostly so the samurai would have a blade they could actually use in doors, but it wasn’t supposed to be dual wielded with a katana. Think of it like buying a kitchen knife set, sure there’s eight knives in there, but you’re not going to be using all of them together at once.

I’ll add, I’ve got nothing against a character that has a reason to use a katana. If it’s a badge of office, a family heirloom, a sign of their order or training, that’s fine. It’s the idea that “this is the best possible sword ever,” which I object to. It’s a two-handed sword. It’s not particularly great. It has a dedicated martial style, predicated on using very fragile blades, (and historical katanas are exceedingly fragile).

Finally, if you’ve got a setting where firearms are outlawed, there’s a few problems specific to the Desert Eagle. I mentioned that they were large and expensive, so let’s break those down a little. First, these are massive pistols. A Mark XIX Desert Eagle weighs just under four and a half pounds. For a pistol that is comically heavy. This is also a gun that is over a foot long. These are large handguns. They are difficult to conceal. If you’re living in a setting where owning a gun is illegal, this is the last thing you want to be carrying on the street. (They’re pretty terrible carry weapons in the real world as well.)

On the current market, with firearms that are legal to buy, a used Desert Eagle will set you back at least $1,200 ($1,400 to $1,700 is more likely, for a gun in decent shape). In contrast, if you’re shopping for a solid conceal carry pistol you can expect to spend somewhere between $400 and $500. Even high grade “tactical” pistols rarely break $1k, unless they’re collector’s items (or SIGs). Most “cool” pistols you see on TV probably cost between $600 and $1k.

If you’re wondering why SIGs manage to command higher prices, it’s because (in most cases) they’re remarkably high quality. I’ve had issues with the American produced SIG Sauer P226s, but in general SIGs are worth the money.

The Desert Eagle really isn’t worth the money. As I said earlier, these are guns you buy to show off, not because you’re looking for a carry weapon.

And, all of this is before you step back and apply the economics for a setting where getting a handgun is illegal. At that point, you’re talking about a gun that could easily cost more than an older model car. Those economics skew against you even harder every time your character pulls the trigger.

Desert Eagles come chambered in a couple different rounds. There’s .357 magnum, .44 magnum, and .50AE. (Technically, there’s also .41 magnum and .440 variants as well.) Gun stores aren’t going to stock a lot, but you can buy them if you’re using something chambered for it. Also worth noting, if you’re dropping the hammer on a .50AE Desert Eagle, it will set you back more than a dollar per bullet. (The current, actual cost in the US is ~$1.35 per round.) But, if you’re in a setting where firearms aren’t easily available, your black market’s going to need to focus on rounds they can actually sell. They may keep a little bit around (and would charge way more than the price I just quoted), but once it’s gone, getting your hands on more could be very difficult. In this sense, it would be much safer if your character was using a firearm that matched to the common calibers in their setting. The reasoning is, that your black market may not keep much .50AE around (if they keep any at all), but they probably will stock 9mm, .45, or whatever your setting’s cops use. It’ll cost substantially more than it would in the real world, but it will be something your character can buy. It also won’t leave behind freakishly expensive shell casings every time they open fire. A string of killings involving a .50AE pistol? That will bring the cops down on their contacts looking for someone who’s been scavenging around the black market for those 12.7mm rounds far faster than a few people who got plugged with a black market .45.

To a lesser extent, the katana and wakizashi have a similar issue. Yeah, sure, they’re cool, I guess, but they’re also memorable. If your character is using a sword (and that’s common in the setting), having the cops looking for someone using a guy with a katana will result in a much shorter search ending at their doorstep than someone with a random non-descript sword or even something like a machete.

If the katana is enchanted, then sure, your character is kind of stuck with it (up to a point), but it’s still a weapon they’d need to be somewhat careful about hiding, and more careful about using.

So, yeah, it’s entirely plausible that you’d have a character who thought all of these were a good idea. If you have a setting where they could actually get their hands on them is a different question.

If you’re thinking they could use the weapons together, then no. They could switch between them, but trying to use them all at once would result in wild flailing, and a malfunctioning pistol.

I can think of, at least, one legitimate reason why your character might carry around a Desert Eagle (or a katana) in a setting like you’re describing, and that’s to scare people. If you’re an enforcer for some shadowy criminal organization, then being able to shove a 14 inch, chrome, monster gun up someone’s nose is an effective option (and yes, the Desert Eagle is a model of handgun you can press into someone without disabling it). But, even then, they’d probably carry something far more practical for times when they were there to kill someone, and not just put the fear of Elmer Keith into them.

Depending on the setting (or the organization they work for), then they might carry and use a katana for that kind of intimidation instead. For instance: If they were Yakuza, it would make some sense. At that point, you might reasonably get a character who used that exact set of weapons for intimidation, and would actually use the katana or wakizashi when provoked.

In general, though, there’s nothing wrong with a character thinking this is all a good idea. It’s not. But, if they could afford it, they might go chasing after that concept anyway.

-Starke

EDIT: As @fox-bright kindly reminded me, it’s the third and fourth fingers on your off hand that you use to control a katana, rather than the first and second. Sorry about that.

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anonymous asked:

I was wondering what your thoughts were on Hooks new rings? Like the rings themselves and what they might mean on a meta level since they aren't his "murder rings" anymore. You think it's a permanent change to go with the wedding ring? I love your thoughts on the show and jewelry!

First, thank you for asking my opinion! That doesn’t happen very often (and probably for good reason, lbr. ;) ). I would have replied sooner, but I’ve been at work. 

As we know, rings can be very symbolic—both in real life and to Killian specifically. We know at least two of the rings have been reminders of a violent past (even if one of those stories doesn’t actually work with the timeline and when we first saw it…ahem), and another was a reminder of his older brother. Rings mean something to him, but not generally anything good. 

“Every ring is a sad story.” (Killian Jones, “Birth”)

From Colin’s Instagram, here are the three main rings Killian has worn throughout the series: the two larger with red stones and some design around it along with a relatively simple silver band for his thumb. We know the two red-stoned rings were taken from men Killian felt wronged him. As he tells Emma, they were once trophies and then reminders. They carried weight—the weight of both hands—and they never let him forget what those hands and hook have done.

Let’s dig into Killian’s jewelry box before we get to the good stuff.

When he gets his hand back on loan from Rumple, he doesn’t let that hand go without a ring, and here we see a pinky ring with a purple stone, somewhat like the one Liam gave him (although I don’t believe they are the same. The stone is similar, but the band is different). 

This is Liam’s ring, although we don’t know where he got it or who gave it to him, if anyone. But Killian poses that it might be the thing that has kept him a survivor all these years. Liam gave it to Killian because it was the ring responsible for always bringing him home safely and he wanted that same thing for Killian when they were about to face what should have been certain death. That ring is so important to Killian, it remains hidden for almost 3 seasons and only comes out when Killian wanted to make sure Emma came back to him safely while she was the Dark One. A pirate doesn’t give his prized possessions to just anyone. 

And here we have Dark One Killian’s rings. Gunmetal and likely onyx or jet. They are as dark as his soul at that moment, and that’s saying something given how dark Killian probably feels about himself and his deeds most of the time. I do like that they gave him a new set of bling for his outing as Dark Hook. I think it was important to illustrate that he was himself yet vastly different, too. The rings they (and possibly Colin) picked for Dark Hook were perfect. Sleek and somewhat classic. And oh so dark. 

Up to this point, every ring has been a sad story. 

But not for long.

(FYI, spoiler picture under the cut.)

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

more about Vito (& Carmela) please?

okay… i have a tiny detail that i love and want to talk about :
LET’S TALK ABOUT VITO WEARING A WEDDING RING! IN THE 1920′S??!!

at the beginning, when you look at the very first scenes of Vito’ & Carmela’s life in Little Italy, Vito doesn’t wear a ring. They were a young couple with not enough money to be spent on such unecessary thing, particularly for a man. Indeed, wedding rings for men were not the standard AT ALL back then (1910′s/1920′s)!!!
So Carmela was the only one wearing a ring. It was the norm back then: only women wore rings.

(( A LITTLE BIT OF HISTORY: the wearing of wedding rings by brides has been traced back to ancient Egypt. And, it is only in the beginning of the 20th century that a very small minority of bridegrooms began doing the same. Only 15% of married men during the Great Depression (1929) decided to wear a ring. WW2 is considered a pivotal point, as many Western men fighting overseas chose to wear wedding rings as a comforting reminder of their families back home.The mid-20th Century is when it becomes mainstream.
Now, about the specific sicilian world : again, it was traditionaly something for wives but not husbands (it was not until the 1950s that the Roman Catholic Church altered its liturgical ring-blessing language to reflect the exchange of two rings). Up to the time of the Second World War, for the great majority of Sicilians, like most were poor, it was unknown for husbands to wear wedding bands. it was the “Italian Miracle” of the early 1960s, a period of economic growth, that found more working-class Italian men wearing gaudy trinkets like necklaces and bracelets, and of course, wedding rings. (x) ))

…let’s go back to Vito…
as said previously, wearing a wedding ring was not the norm at all for men, particularly for Italian men before WW2. BUT, *oh surprise*, we see a golden band at Vito’s left hand and left finger during the scenes in Sicily, when he comes back for his little vendetta in 1922.
Again, a ring at this finger for a man was very unsual back then.

it could be argued that his ring was a symbol of connection with the mafia. indeed, the first appearance of this ring coincide with Vito’s new wealth, so we can imagine it as an exterior sign of sucess and money. But then, why wearing it at the Left Ring Finger (the finger for promises/heart) ?
when you look at the other members of the mob in the three movies, a pinky ring is worn on the little finger, a clear sign of mafia connections and sign of success (same in the tv-show The Sopranos). For example:

  • Don Fanucci : a pinky ring during the 1910′s & 1920′s - it shows us that the tradition of a golden band on the little finger for members of the ‘cosa nostra’ is old and known in Italy. So definitely something Vito was aware of.
  • Sonny Corleone : a pinky ring again, the 1940′s - interesting to notice that Sonny is a married man at this moment but is not wearing a ring at his left finger. Sonny prefers to show his devotion to the ‘family business’ than to his wife (and indeed, we know about it…)
  • Michael Corleone : a pinky ring, the 1970′s/80′s - Michael at the end of life as Don, an old man, just like was Vito in PART I. (Michael did wear wedding ring, before his divorce, but during the 40′s/50′s when it was more mainstream)

ANYWAY, no pinky ring for Vito.
we can assume that he decided knowingly to not wear a ring at his little finger. Maybe he didn’t want to externalize his connection with the mafia, but lbh, everybody knows who he was and what was his business in Little Italy and in NewYork. No need of ring or symbol to show where he comes from, or to express some kind of pride.
From his youth to his last years, this golden ring has always been the only ring at his hand and Vito would wear it until his death.

the only explantion : it is a wedding ring. Clear and simple. A ring likely bought in 1921/1922, before the travel in Sicily and during the rise to power of Vito –so, more money to spend. A little golden band symbolizing his bond and fidelity to a woman (let’s not forget that in italian a wedding band is named “fede”, literally “faith”). Just like Carmela’s ring is an evidence of her fidelity to Vito. Loyalty and faithfulness are probably the two greatest values Vito admire the most in his family and in his friends. He expects loyalty from them so it would be normal for him to express his own loyalty & to be an example of faithfulness. What a better way to start than a wedding ring?
It is quite remarkable tho, because Vito is known as being a very traditional Sicilian man –however, a man wearing a wedding ring during the 1920′s is something exceptional.
This ring was as well a display of wealth. A beautiful golden band but an unecessary piece of jewellery for a man back then… People probably thought when they spotted the ring: “This man is cleary married and displays it, look at his finger. AND DUDE! LOOK AT THIS HUGE GOLDEN RING??!!!!”

tl; dr:Vito, aka the most traditional Sicilian man ever, wore a wedding ring during 20′s, against the standards of the era, because he was a devoted man and wanted to show it… and because lbh, gold looked nice on him :))

“Ticks” Spencer Reid Imagine

“Hey, Y/N, are you alright?”

Every day it was the same question, and every day it was the same answer.

“Oh yeah, I’m fine.”

You would even punctuate it with a smile, reminding yourself to crinkle your eyes so that he couldn’t tell it was a fake one.

But something in your gut told you he already knew.

You would try to hid your nervous ticks from him, like the way you always crinkled your eyes up, using the apples of your cheeks to make sure your glasses were straight on your face.

Or the way you would adjust them with your right hand if you were immersed in a conversation that made you uncomfortable.

Or the way you would tap your fingers on your right hand in an alternating order whenever you were looking for answers within a case file.

Thumb, middle, pinky, pointer, ring.

Thumb, middle, pinky, pointer, ring.

Thumb, middle, pinky, pointer, ring.

Over and over again until you either brought your thumb to your lip because you came across something disturbing, or bit down on your lower lip because you were following a theory you had come up with.

After a while, Spencer started doing things to help you calm down in the field, like flattening the palm of his hand on your mid-back and pushing his fingertips in on either side of your spine.

Or rubbing his hand up and down your arm.

Or wrapping his arm around your shoulders and pulling you close.

He knew when you ran off to the bathroom unexpectedly, you were trying to regulate your breathing as your hand shook.

But this morning you weren’t in the bullpen.

You weren’t chewing on your lip or adjusting your glasses or tapping your fingers.

“Hotch?  Have you heard from Y/L/N?” Spencer asks.

“I was actually coming to ask you that question,” Hotch admits.

Furrowing his brow as he gazes at the elevators worriedly, Hotch comes and stands beside him.

“Why don’t you go check on her?” he offers.

And as Spencer grabs his bag and bolts for the opening doors, his heart rate races as worry begins to flood his throat and cloud his judgement.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As the taxi pulls up to your house, Spencer swallows hard as he realizes all of the lights in your home are turned off.

Thanking the driver and paying him well, Spencer turns back towards your house as he bounds up the driveway and knocks furiously on your door.

“Y/N?” he says, continuously knocking on your door, “Y/N, it’s me.  Are you there?”

Coming to in your bed as you roll over, the furious knocking ringing your ears, you grumble as you slowly scoot out of bed, throwing your robe on over yourself as you shuffle out to your front door.

“Y/N-”

Throwing the door open as Spencer pauses mid-knock, his fist in the air as he quickly drops it to his side, you furrow your brow as the daytime sun blazes past you and into your home.

“What time is it?” you croak, your brows furrowing together as you poke your head outside.

“It’s 9:30 am,” Spencer says, looking you up and down as he breathes a sigh of relief.

“Oh shit,” you mutter, leaving the door open as you run into your room, searching for your anxiety medication as you throw the bottle open and count the pills.

“Oh, god,” you groan, holding your head as you search for your phone, Spencer poking his head around the corner into your bedroom.

“Are you alright?” he asks sheepishly.

“Oh yeah, I’m fine,” came your rhetorical response.

It stopped you in your tracks.

“Hotch,” he answers the phone.

“Y-yes,” you say as you slowly turn towards Spencer, his puppy dog eyes begging you for the truth as you begin to speak again.

“Hotch, I am so sorry.  I…um…I overslept.  My alarm didn’t go off and I didn’t wake up until Spencer came banging on my door.  It won’t happen again, I promise.”

You raised your hand up to push your nonexistent glasses up on the bridge of your nose…something you did when you knew you were lying.

“Everyone’s allowed to be late…once,” Hotch says, “Get cleaned up and come on in with Spencer.”

“Yes, sir,” you say as you hang up the phone, tossing it onto your bed as it bounces on the mattress and off of the other end.

Standing in your darkened bedroom as you grab your bottle of anxiety medication, you pop the top and toss your head back, dry-swallowing the pill thrown at the back of your mouth.

“Y/N?” Spencer asks.

You had forgotten he was here.

Jumping at his voice, you turn around, realizing he has stepped into your bedroom.

“Talk to me,” he begs, barely above a whisper.

Staring at his chest as you raise your right hand to once again adjust your nonexistent glasses, you sigh as your hand drops off to your side.

“Anxiety,” you breathe, lazily motioning to your bottle of pills on your bedside drawer.

“How long?” he asks.

“Uh…about 7 years now.”

“Any particular reason?” he inquires.

Shaking your head, you feel your hands begin to tremble as your breathing starts to shallow out again.

“Hey, hey, it’s alright,” he coos, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you close, “It’s alright.  It’s just me.”

“It uh…it makes me very tired,” you say as you pull away from him, tears flooding your eyes, “…when I forget to take it.  I must have fallen asleep early last night and forgotten to take it.”

“Are you alright?” he asks, grasping your shoulders with his hands and bending down to your eye-level.

“Once this medication kicks in, I will be a lot better,” you say.

You saw Spencer actively searching for your tick as his small grin grows into a smile, realizing that it isn’t surfacing.

“Go get cleaned up for work.  We can stop for coffee before we get in,” Spencer smiles.

“That sounds wonderful,” you breathe, a light, relieving chuckle escaping your lips as you turn towards your bathroom.

“Y/N?” Spencer calls out.

“Yeah?” you respond, turning around towards him.

“If we are ever on a case, you know…in the hotels and such…and you wake up struggling, or something…”

Searching his body as you watch his shoulders tense, you smile lightly at him as you nod.

“Thank you, Spencer,” you say.

“N-not a problem,” he offers back with a weak smile.

“Just promise me one thing?” he says, almost as an afterthought.

“What is it?” you ask, not bothering to turn back towards him.

“Please don’t lie to me anymore.  I know when you’re not alright.  And I can help.  I promise I can.”

The hurt in his voice made your soul ache.

“I promise,” you say, choking back the tears as you cross the threshold into your bathroom, shutting the door behind you as you let go of the breath you realized you were holding.

Originally posted by toyboxboy

another trashy angsty simon minter imagine

not requested for once lmao, probably absolute trash but have this while i take some time out - also are any of my followers one direction trash bcos i am and i would really like to write some harry imagines but obvs its up to u guys cause i wanna please yall?? anyway idk enjoy

“Why is it that everytime I see you, you’re drunk, Y/n?”

His voice instantly soothed the aching in my brain. I shut my eyes, hoping to just listen to that voice for a while without hurting. I knew that seeing his face would hurt. I wasn’t ready for that. 

He sounded cautious, almost. Hesitant. I wasn’t sure how to react. Part of me wanted to scream at him, to throw something, to make him hurt. But I couldn’t. 

I wanted him to think I didn’t care anymore. But the alcohol in my veins took control of my shy mouth, running the controls behind my timid, shaking voice.

“Oh don’t worry, Simon,” I breathed, feeling my words float away into the hall. “I’m drunk when you don’t see me too.”

“And how often is that?”

“I’ve lost track.”

His sigh was audible between the narrow white walls. Disappointment. I’m so damn familiar these days. He always managed to do this; to make me feel like it was my fault. I hated him for doing that. I hated myself for believing him.

“Y/n, why are you out here? Why aren’t you inside?”

“I could ask you the same fucking question Simon,” I spat at him bitterly. “It’s my flat. Why are you here? Why aren’t you out with your fun little friends, picking up girls, smashing and forgetting? Why, Simon?”

He sighed again, his lips pressed in a straight line. I couldn’t exactly tell what the look in his eyes was. I wasn’t sure I wanted to.

“Because, Y/n, it’s a Tuesday. Some of us work. And plus, my ‘fun little friends’ told me you were locked out. And I…” his voice trailed off as he cleared his throat, scanning the floor for his next words. “Well, I still have your key. The spare one.”

Spare. 

Just like that, I burst into tears. Uncontrollable, loud, messy sobs. I hated myself for it, but I hated myself anyway, and so what really was the difference? After all this time, it was still Simon coming to my rescue, picking up the pieces that only broke when he started to touch them. It was almost like I couldn’t live without him. The thought made me cry more.

As I sobbed his face softened, panic overtaking it.

“Oh no please, please don’t cry.” He crouched down to face me from where I sat slouched on the floor. “You’re okay, you’re fine-”

“No I’m fucking not Simon! Stop kidding yourself, you know just as well as I do I’m not fine!” I pushed him away and he flinched. 

“I don’t know what you want me to do, Y/n,” his voice came out so small, so defeated. My heart throbbed. I focused on my hands, the dark makeup stained tears falling into them. “I’m trying, I really am. But I’m so worried about you. I’m constantly scared about what you’re gonna do when I’m not around. I can’t leave you alone.”

“Look at yourself, Y/n,” he continued as he lifted me, holding me in his arms. I curled up against his neck as he fumbled around in his pocket for the key. “You’re ruining yourself.”

I cried harder as he lowered his voice to a whisper that I wasn’t completely sure I was intended to hear. “Or am I ruining you?”

Before I knew it I was on my bed again. The hard, unwelcoming mattress was familiar against my back. I watched as Simon sat beside me. The fatigue had hit.

“What am I gonna do with you, Y/n?”

“Stay with me,” I responded groggily. His hand reached out, stroking my hair. The cold silver of his pinky ring touched my scalp slightly.

“You know I can’t do that, Y/n. You have to learn to live without me.”

“But it’s hard,” I sobbed softly. 

“I know, Y/n. I think you forget I’m learning too.” His face was a picture amongst the dark room as he continued to stroke my hair. “It’s weird, and it’s lonely, and it’s hard. But it’s for the best.”

“For the best?” I asked drousily. “You’re better without me?”

“No, best for you. I’m not what you need, Y/n. You’ll realise it one day.”

“You’re what I want.”

He edged further away from me like an elastic band I’d lost control of. An elastic band with a lot of commitment issues and insecurities. I felt my heart crack as he withdrew his hand. Amongst the darkness, in my drunken tired state, I wasn’t entirely convinced I hadn’t seen him use it to wipe away a tear of his own.

As I drifted to sleep he continued to talk to my state. I knew I wouldn’t remember half of this tomorrow, and I knew he knew that too. But for now it was nice to hear his thoughts.

“We always come up too short,” Simon sighed from the end of my bed. “I just wish…I wish it had been different. That I had been different.”

“I don’t,” I slurred. “Do you love me, Simon?”

“More than you know, Y/n.”

“So why didn’t it work?”

“I don’t have the answers, Y/n. I wish I did.” For a brief second he turned away. Then forcing a smile, he turned back to me, standing. “Now get some sleep.”

“Are you gonna leave?”

“Not yet, Y/n. Not just yet.”