pink one piece swimsuit

SOULMATE AU PARODY! KANG DANIEL

[i gave up on making this funny IT WAS LITERLALY IMPOSSIBLE]

this is a Daniel x Alex thing!! @jeonjeonggukks

  • FUCK finding her special 1 wuz always on the #1 spot of Alex’s bucket list >.<
  • “sum1 to luv me 4ever SIGN ME THE FUK UPPP”
  • her soulmate was tied to her by matching birthmarks
  • ok but 1 problem,, their birthmarks are by their belly buttons and
  • .. Alex has omphalophobia !!!
  • the fear of belly buttons EEPERS!! WUT 2 DO
  • it’s said that once she meets her soulmate her omphalophobia curse will be undone!1!1!
  • she had been trying her hardest to get past her fear though
  • u know
  • buying … crop tops
  • and when she was sad and wanted to cry she would go on reddit and read threads about people piercing their belly buttons
  • anyways, Alex decided she would have to get past this fear!!
  • so she
  • … she
  • she finally gave her friends the ok on losing her …
  • water park virginity 
  • Alex got jittery from the thought of seeing so many buttons exposed
  • she even bought a one-piece swimsuit for the occasion
  • it was hot pink velvet with orange and poop brown leopard print on it!!
  • but who knows?? maybe she could find her soulmate
  • SO
  • SHE GRABBED THE PAIR OF GREEN SAFETY SCISSORS IN HER DRAWER
  • CUT INTO THE SWIMSUIT
  • while struggling because bitch those are not fabric scissors
  • AND TOOK OUT A BIG CHUNK OF FABRIC
  • now Alex tried on the swimsuit and saw the beautiful and uneven hole she had made on her
  • it was .. perfect
  • cut to getting to the water park
  • when they got inside and went on the first water slide, Alex felt reborn
  • and thennn she felt her undigested breakfast panic in her stomach
  • since she wuz a bit queasy her friends dropped her because ain’t nobody got time to wait for her
  • sooo Alex sat down in the kiddy pool while taking a deep breath of chlorine scented air when
  • FUCK
  • SOME BITCH WITH 60 CM SHOULDERS WALKS INTO THE VENUE AND
  • by now Alex was choking on air
  • they locked eyes and for a good 7 seconds they were jus staring at each other
  • it was then when Alex shifted her gaze down and
  • saw his
  • hole >.<
  • THE BELLYBUTTON WAS SO GLORIOUS
  • SHE GASPED AND STOOD UP
  • AND THAT’S WHWN
  • DANIEL SAW HER BIRTHMARK
  • exchanging high pitched, eeeeepss!!! they dramatically ran towards eachotehr
  • Daniel tripped on her slippery blue flip flops but Alex caught him
  • and thet gave her the perfect chance to touch his abs
  • and maybe touch his abs some more
  • and a lil more just to be sure
  • she didn’t notice the matching birthmark until then
  • I guess the abs were too distracting
  • and that’s when things turned magical
  • the start of their relationship
  • Daniel initiated conversation
  • it was the best thing a girl could ask for
  • the first words the soulmates would hear from each other
  • he looked her in the eyes and that’s when it happened
  • “yeoreojwo~”


note: hey so i’m dedicating this to @jeonjeonggukks // alex and she’s the biggest angst fangirl you’ll ever come across and also writes it along with fluff! she wrote an actual soulmate au if you wanna read it! requests are open for more parodies or real writings haha as of right now I’m not planning on writing this for the other members but if u want it,, my ask is open