pinay ako

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Angel,16 years old, Half filipino-half white, and i live in pretty much an all white area (aka IOWA)

I’m not happy when I get told I look Korean or Japanese and tell me that they could have never guessed that I was filipino, because I am. I have filipino blood in my veins and it’s not a compliment when people say that to me (although Korea and Japan are wonderful places). When guys tell me that since I look Korean that they like me better, that isn’t a compliment to me anymore- Just say I’m beautiful!

I’m was blessed with beautiful dark skin when I was little, when my mom handed me my first bar of whitening soap. I remember her pulling my flat nose saying that if she does this I’ll be more beautiful and that flat noses are ugly. Whitening soap and trying to shape my face to have european features was my life up to when I reached my teenage years. Teenagers insisted that I was asian if I looked like an eastern asian, then I was asian. My beautiful thick eyebrows were ruined by words that people told me. I used to be ashamed of my pinay blood and how people said that “Pineapple”(Yes. a boy said that to me instead of the Pinas" was a dirty place. Since I’ve gotten older now, I’ve realized that you need to be proud of where your ancestry comes from because that’s your story, and you will continue that story of being (insert race). Don’t hide your ethnicity because of what everyone says that asian people look like- you’re asian because you have asian blood.

I’m not your cute china doll. I’m not a geisha doll, either. I’m not a submissive, tiny asian girl who subdues to everyones needs. And I’m DEFINITELY not your token asian or asian best friend.

I’m not eastern asian. I’M NOT EASTERN ASIAN. I NEVER will be eastern asian. I’m proud of being south eastern asian. I’m proud of having filipino blood. I’m proud of being part of the subanen tribe back in lapuyan city in Mindanao. I’m proud of who I am. Ako ay pinay.