pin screen

Fishing: digital painting walkthrough

So I got a question on anon asking me about my drawing coloring process, and unfortunately I accidentally deleted it, because I have clumsy fingers on mobile.

Thank you so much for your interest, I’m really honored! I will try and give a brief overview of my drawing process, and hope this is helpful or useful to you! I just started experimenting with Photoshop last summer around July, so I’m definitely not the most experienced, I’m still learning a lot!

I’m going to be using this drawing of Lapis, because it’s one of my favorite pieces and it is more detailed than my average drawing: 

This drawing was inspired by the episode “Alone At Sea”, where I wanted to illustrate this concept: 

This was my main reference, but I also throughout, used a lot of google images of water and colorful fish. 

Sketch: My canvas size was 3000 px wide and 2000 px high. I tend to sketch with the standard brushes and I actually have like 2 layers of sketches (one for basic shapes/sizes of things, then one for rough details and things). 

Lineart + base coloring: I add lineart, usually px size 6-8, with the pencil brush. I then add base colors, using the default solid brush. Usually they are the generic color I’m going for. I try not to get too stressed about the base colors because I usually cover most of them up.

Primary highlights/light sources: It gets more interesting once you establish primary light sources, so where the main light source is coming from, as well as reflections of things. I use a larger brush and add these on new layers, set to either overlay or screen or pin light. So I wanted light to be shining through the water, making the color reflect on Lapis, which is how it works with real light. 

Detail/color: I think this is the most fun part, where you choose colors to paint over. I think I painted this the way I normally use watercolor, which is combining a lot of complimentary and contrasting colors with varying amounts of saturation. It’s more complicated to explain that, but it’s a lot of eyeballing. For example, referring to the reddish colors, I tried spreading them around the drawing instead of having them just in one place. The reddish fish reflects around the water bubble, and the light is reflected on Lapis’s clothing as well. 

Highlights: This makes your drawing really stand out - often at this stage, many layers are on ‘luminosity’, ‘screen’ or ‘overlay’. I also do this with the lineart layer as well, so there are not just harsh black lines, which can be distracting. There are also secondary light sources, such as at the back of Lapis’s head, because I felt like there was still not enough red-orange in the drawing. 

Small white lines also make a big difference (such as those on the bubble, and on the edges of her jacket/in her hair). 

I later went and adjusted the color balance a bit, as well as increased the contrast so some more areas would appear darker and it was a bit less green in color. 


That is kind of the overview! I hope this was helpful at all, or at least interesting! If you have any more questions I would be happy to answer, I enjoy rambling. Sorry if this was a bit long!

Thank you so much for taking an interest!

9

Behind the Scenes of Planet of the Dead - Part Five

Excerpts from Benjamin Cook’s set report in DWM 408:

On Valentine’s Day in the desert, what could possibly be more romantic than an oversized fly waving a gun at a lady in a catsuit? It’s hard to think of anything, isn’t it?

It’s our final day filming in the UAE [United Arab Emirates], and veteran Doctor Who monster performer Paul Kasey has arrived to play Sorvin the Tritovore. “The head is operated by remote control,” he explains, “which Neill [Gorton, prosthetics designer] is operating off camera.” Isn’t that disconcerting for Paul? “You get a sense of what’s happening. Over the years, I’ve begun to recognize the different motor sounds.”

So, Sorvin marches the Doctor and Christina, at gunpoint, toward his crashed Tritovore spaceship - presently a green screen pinned against the double-decker bus. “Can you still see where you’re going, Paul?” asks James [Strong, director]

But he can’t. “There’s your mark, Paul,” says David [Tennant], guiding his captor. “HEY, PAUL?!!!”

Meanwhile, just out of shot, Daniel Kaluuya [who plays Barclay] is relieving himself on a tuft of shrubbery. “I know I shouldn’t look,” giggles Victoria Alcock [who plays Angela], “but I can’t help it.”

“I’m letting it grow, man,” insists Daniel. “Giving it a chance. They’ll call this the Kaluuya tree.”

David is more focused on his shades. “I’ve had my sunglasses on again,” he tells make-up man Steve Smith. The specs leave a slight mark on the bridge of his nose, requiring a retouch.

“Not again!” sighs Steve.

“Well, it’s bright,” David grins, “and I look cool in them.”

However, the sun soon starts setting. James wants to squeeze in one final shot: David and Michelle running down the hill, carrying the clamps from the Tritovore spaceship. On the take, Michelle trips, tumbling arse over tip. “Sorry, sorry, sorry,” she flinches, getting up and dusting herself down.

“She managed to make even that look dramatic and well-handled,” David points out.

“Phwoar, I wouldn’t mind being the sand beneath Michelle,” mutters someone who will remain nameless.

“I can’t believe how fast David runs,” Michelle admits, “but then I’m Lady Christina; the Doctor should be a bit faster than me. I guess she’s a fantasy figure, with her catsuit and backpack, but also she’s real in that she’s not flawless. She’s not Wonder Woman.”

Other parts of this set:  [ one ] [ two ] [ three ] [ four ] [ six ] [ seven ]
[ Masterlist of all Doctor Who Behind-the-Scenes Photosets ]

anonymous asked:

Listened to a lady complain and throw a fit over our pin pads screens being too dark. While she wore her sunglasses... indoors... just kept complaining and just being rude.

Weird is as weird does.

-Rodney

anonymous asked:

how do you think alpha bucky would react to his mate being in heat? Reader x bucky please?

I’ve never written A/B/O before, sorry if I don’t do it any justice! Slightly smutty? More so just talk. xo


Bucky’s day had been long, he wanted nothing more than to climb into bed with Y/N and curl up with her all night. Steve had him training all day, learning how to function with the new prosthetic limb Tony had installed for him. Sweat was still clinging to his damp skin when he walked out of the elevator in the tower, his shirt suctioning to his chest.

Bucky wasn’t expecting it at first. Wasn’t expecting the permeating smell of a desperate omega in heat. Wasn’t expecting to be engulfed in the scent of an omega who only wanted an Alpha to ravish them. 

He had to pause his walk for a moment, his Alpha tendencies taking over as his eyes fluttered close and he took a long whiff from the air. His breath catches in his throat as he inhales the smell of the omega. An omega in heat. His omega in heat.

“Maybe I should have stepped in and helped her out while you were gone.” Nat smirks from her door, intentionally inhaling the same air that holds Bucky’s mate’s scent. “Man, what I could’ve done to her.” He growls at her, barring his teeth as he holds his gaze on her.

Nat shuts the door, taking one last teasing sniff before she shuts herself in her apartment. It takes Bucky all of two seconds to sprint the rest of the way down the hall, banging his shoulder into the door as he fumbled with the lock panel. 

God, if Bucky wasn’t so angry with Nat he would’ve realized the straining erection in his pants by now.

Once he manages to type the pin into the screen, the door opens easily under the weight of his metal hand. He takes a few steps in, trying to calm his breathing when he’s wrapped in the smell of his mate.

Honey crisp apples and autumn air – her smell was always intoxicating. 

Bucky remembers the first time he caught a whiff of her, hair pinned up, scent gland on display as she walked around Tony’s party without so much as looking at an alpha. She smelt like home, comforting and reassuring. He knew then that she was the one from the instant he smelt her.

“Babydoll?” Bucky calls throughout the apartment, sniffing the air to follow the distinct trail that would lead him to his girlfriend. He stops the sling his shirt into the laundry room before walking over to the closed bedroom door.

A small whimper catches his ear, the serum enhancing his already pristine Alpha senses. He clasps the knob in his hand, pushing it open with little effort.

“Shit, doll.” He groans, swallowing the lump in his throat to take in the sight in front of him. His girl, his mate, pleasuring herself with her bottom lip tucked neatly between her teeth. Her eyebrow are worried together, fingers working circles across her clit.

Her eyes open for a moment, no doubt smelling Bucky’s musky scent. “Buck,” She hiccups, gasping as she quickens her hand. “Please, help. Want your knot.” She purrs, rolling her hips.

“Patience, baby.” Bucky chides, kicking his shoes into the corner of the room. He’s always been one to tease his omega, despite how annoyed she got when he did. “Breathe, i’m gonna take care of you.”

Y/N whines, popping her bottom lip from her mouth. “Buck, no teasing. Not today, can’t – fuck – not now.” She’s whimpering, her heat completely overtaking her body.

“My pretty little omega. So, so gorgeous.” Bucky admires, walking over to the bed to lean over his girl. He places his metal hand next to her head, rubbing his flesh thumb over her jaw. “Gonna fuck you so good, tire you out.”

He swats her hand away from between her legs, slotting a sweatpants clad leg there instead. “Already so wet for me, baby. Should’a told me this morning that you were expecting your heat, would’ve stayed here with you today.” He murmurs.

“Was a bit earlier than I expected.” She huffs, dragging her lips across Bucky’s as she speaks. “Shocked you couldn’t smell it.”

Bucky nods, pressing his leg down into her. “Smelt something this morning, figured you were in pre-heat or somethin’. But I’m here now and we’re not leaving this bed until you get my knot, baby doll.”

Y/N nods eagerly up at him, hands winding around his broad shoulders to tug him down. Bucky grins, pressing his lips against hers to taste the sweetness of her chapstick. 

“Gonna take real good care of you, babydoll. My sweet little omega.”

Rain

Fandom: Twenty One Pilots

Pairing: JoshxReader

Word Count: 695

Warnings: Major fluffiness

Prompt Summary: Reader is a makeup artist on the set of the HeavyDirtySoul music video. After finishing everyone’s makeup, the set is surprised by some storms. 

Credit to GIF owner 

You had just finished dusting the brush over the pinks of Josh’s cheeks, making sure the shadows on his face would be highlighted during the shoot of the video. You were definitely not an advocate when it came to filming outside. You thought the natural light from the sky affected different angles and shadows along the face; however, no one else noticed this the way you did. it must’ve been a makeup artist thing.

Josh drummed his fingers in the air, tucking his lip behind his teeth. You smiled, dragging your brush one more time down his nose then finally sipping it into your back pocket.

“Perfect” you mumble.

Josh furrows his eyebrows at the statement and you soon find the apples of your cheeks red and hot. You repressed a laugh; your job wholly consisted you of admiring someone’s face and muttering things like ‘beautiful’ and ‘gorgeous’ to yourself. Usually, the awkwardness remained at a subtle level but every now and again you felt yourself blush. Especially around Josh who’ve you found yourself crushing on for as long as you could remember. Taking one last glance at his face, you swept your hands together and called it a job well done.

“Looking good” you say, taking a small step back. Josh smiles.

“Thanks Y/N” he says before turning on his heel and back towards his drum set. As he takes a seat, you can’t help but feel a sense of pride. You had been the Twenty One Pilots makeup artist for what seems like forever. You had been on each and every shoot and now you stand tall, watching as the Blurryface era slowly and sadly comes to an end.

The cameramen come forward with huge cameras placed atop their shoulders, eyes pinned to the little screen in front of them. Josh twirls his drumsticks, bouncing up and down on his stool as the cameramen count him down. When they finally yell ‘action’ all of Josh’s energy goes immediately into drumming, his drumsticks rapidly flying through the air. His head bobs to the beat, arms bulging and slicked with sweat. You loved how Josh was so passionate about his drumming, always making an effort to go above.

You continue to watch Josh, taking note of the moving set. The sky above you is dark gray and lingers close to the ground. You look up and are surprised by a low rumble moving through the clouds. Josh’s drumming eases to a halt as his eyes connect with the sky, the cameras on the cameramen’s shoulders beginning to droop.

“I think it’s going to rain” one of them says.

“Don’t jinx it!” calls another.

Everyone on set remains quiet until another growl shakes the sky, followed by drops of rain beginning to fall. The set then erupted in commotion. You hastily began to cover your brushes, the rain now beginning to come down harder. You closed all your palettes and stuffed them inside your bag, back soaked with water. The coolness on your bare arms sent shivers down your spine. The people on set begin to cover everything, casting a tarp over Josh’s drums, covering the bulky cameras with thick plastic. After your stuff is safely put away, you cross your arms over your chest, desperately trying to hug the warmth towards you.

Josh hurries over to your area, jacket hooked around his shoulders. He stands next to you watching as everyone on set hurries around. The thunder above roars, crashing into the grey clouds.

“Are you cold?” Josh asks over the rain roaring on top of the asphalt.

Before you can reply, your teeth begin to chatter and your arms have prominent goosebumps running along your skin. Josh notices. He then slides the jacket off his back and hooks it around your shoulders; leaving him in nothing but a tank top.

“Josh! I can’t take your jacket!” you say, sliding the jacket off. Josh pushes it back up, “It’s find. I don’t mind” he smiles. You look at him gratefully and hug the jacket close to your body.

Needless to say, you kept the jacket on the rest of the shoot, even after it stopped raining. 

JUNGKOOK FIC

SURPRISE! 

A new fic is out! This was a request by @delightfulness-ela (SPOILER warning for the request though)

-Diri
(Also this video…)

Update: I tried adding a YN changer as a test (even though it only appears twice) - this only works on the browser version of my blog though..

Your name: submit What is this?

Old Enough

Jungkook x Noona
Words: ~2,400
Keywords: Age gap?

Originally posted by 7bboys

You checked your phone. It was 8:49 pm.

You had spent your entire day with Jungkook, your good friend.
That wasn’t a lie, but also not entirely true.

Truth is, you liked each other. A lot

You both knew that too. It was obvious.
The way you two looked at each other would’ve been enough to make a blind person notice. You were always stealing glances, touching each other whenever it wouldn’t seem weird. You both knew how much you longed for each other, how much you both fantasised about being together but neither of you acted on it.

Why?

Because you were older than him. 4 years to be precise and for some reason, you had always felt that your undeniable attraction towards him was somehow wrong. That you shouldn’t see him that way. That he should be like a younger brother to you - like he used to be before he became a man right in front of your eyes. Heck, he hasn’t even been of legal age for long! 

Thoughts like that filled your mind whenever you found yourself looking at him, whenever you caught your heart beating faster at his touch. But you could never break off contact, you knew that. The guilt killed you, tortured you but it couldn’t keep you from thinking about him. It couldn’t stop you from dreaming about him every night, longing for him so much it hurt. It just made you feel shit.
So you tried your best to suppress your feelings, hating yourself for not being able to, and you tried your best to keep treating him like a brother. 

He noticed that.
He knew that you liked him.
He knew that you hated it. 
So as much as it hurt, as much as it pained him, he tried to play along. For your sake, hoping that one day you will give him a chance.

You had met him around noon. He just came back from tour the day before so you hadn’t seen him for months and you were super excited to spend some time with him again. Of course, you had texted, had talked over Skype, but seeing him in person was something else. His presence, his smell, his touch. You had missed him so much when he was gone that you were almost too ashamed to admit it to yourself.

First, you had some brunch, then you went shopping a little and then just strolled around for a while, catching up. You hit the arcade, you went bowling. Avoiding people as much as possible was not all that hard for you anymore, you learned where to go when and even if you were seen, your friendship was public but why provoke it. Dating rumours had stirred up a while ago, it wasn’t pretty, but they mostly died down quickly and things went back to normal soon. 

When it got late he had told you to go home and wait for him, he had something to take care of and would come over after to ‘watch a movie or something’ so that’s what you had done. Now, you were sitting on your sofa, waiting for him. 

Ding-Dong

You shot up from the sofa and ran to open the door.
Of course, you already knew who it was, but you checked the camera anyway and a fond smile crept up on your face. You opened up quickly and waited by the door for him to make it up to your apartment.

When he got out of the elevator you saw that he was carrying-

PIZZA!”  you squealed happily.
You hadn’t really noticed that you hadn’t eaten anything since brunch, but now that you saw and smelled the pizza the feeling of hunger struck you like a truck.
“Omg you’re the best, Kookie, I’m starving!”
“Of course I am!” He replied with a silly cocky expression. 
Once inside, you took the pizza boxes out of his hands to allow him to bend down to take off his shoes.
“Top one’s yours,” he said with a smile, looking up to you.

You opened the box and smiled.
Of course. It was your favourite.
He always knew exactly what you liked and would always make sure you get it. You didn’t even have to tell him anymore.

Jungkook suggested a movie you could watch while eating, one that Namjoon had recommended, and you had wholeheartedly agreed. So you sat on the sofa, put the movie on and ate your pizzas, joking around and thoroughly enjoying yourselves.

He had put a pillow between his crossed legs on which he had put the hot pizza but now that you were done eating he was hugging it instead. You watched him, watched how his beautiful arms wrapped around the pillow, his eyes pinned to the screen. The movie was interesting no doubt but you just couldn’t seem to concentrate on it. What you didn’t know was that neither could he - he stared at the screen to not stare at you, partly because he could see you staring. 
You hadn’t seen him in so long and your mind was clouded, consumed with thoughts of him, him cuddling the pillow… him cuddling you and before you could the memories of that one night came back to you again and made your heart pound hard.

That night, he had come over late and stayed for a long time. He stayed so long you both got really tired. You can’t recall how it went, but somehow you woke up the next morning together. In your bed. Cuddling.
He stayed so long you both got really tired. You can’t recall how it went, but somehow you woke up the next morning together. In your bed. Cuddling.
When you slowly came back from sleep that day you had a smile plastered on your face. You felt safe, warm and happy.
It took you a while to process your surroundings but after a while, you noticed that arms were tightly wrapped around you, your arm around someone too, your legs tangled up and a familiar, beloved scent in your nose.

Your heart started racing. 

You didn’t want to open your eyes at first, feeling like if you did you admitted you were awake and would feel obliged to move away. To break this wonderful moment. So you stayed like that for a while, trying to burn this moment into your memory, sure that it won’t ever happen again. After a while, the urge to open your eyes to see him grew too much and you gave in, opening them to the most beautiful sight you had ever seen. 
There he was, right in front of you and in the bright morning light shining through the windows, laying between your white sheets with his hair ruffled up from sleeping he looked like an angel.

You suppressed your urge to either cry or kiss him and you swore to yourself you would forevermore treasure this moment, taking in every little detail, saving it in a safe place of your memory before you decided to move away, careful not to wake him up and you never spoke of it again.

Ever since then, not a night passed where you wouldn’t lay awake in your bed thinking about it, thinking about how wondrous it was waking up next him, waking up in his soothing embrace and you dreamed about how it would be having him there with you, falling asleep in his arms.

The movie was over by now, not that either of you really watched what happened but neither of you said anything and you started cleaning up. You saw him check his phone a few times and you noticed all the messages he had. He had ignored his phone almost all day but you knew he had many responsibilities to get to. Suddenly you felt a little bad for hogging his entire day. You didn’t really plan to but time flew by and he didn’t say anything about having to go so you didn’t either.
You put the last glass in the dishwasher and went back to the living room where he had put all the pillows back in place and sat down next to him once more.

He checked his phone again and sighed.
“I really gotta go, Y/N…”
Oh…” you said quietly, sounding a lot sadder than you intended.
“Aw come on don’t sound so sad! It’s super late already plus I really have to catch up on practice since I spent all day with you!” he chuckled and gave you his signature smile.
“Whatever!” you replied, “I wasn’t even sad”, smiling back at him while getting up from your spot.
“It was nice though-” you continued “-to spend time with you again.”
You quietly added “I missed you so much” to yourself, sure he couldn’t hear.

You knew you had spent all day together but still- if you were honest with yourself you really didn’t want to let him go yet. That’s why you found yourself trying to extend the time you spent as much as possible.

You walked him to the door, then downstairs, then outside. 
You walked down the street with him, only for a block or so, and that’s when you finally stopped. The cool night breeze was gently blowing through your hair, blowing across your exposed skin sending a little tingling shiver through your body.
The cool night breeze was gently blowing through your hair, blowing across your exposed skin sending a little tingling shiver through your body.

Then you were tightly hugging each other goodbye, way longer than necessary, like usual. Maybe it was the contrast between his warmth and the cold air that felt so good or maybe because you hadn’t seen him for so long but tonight, more than ever, you didn’t want to let go. You didn’t want him to leave, leave you for another night alone wishing he was there with you.

Heads sunk in each others neck, pressed against each other, you took in the smell of his cologne, his wonderful smell that you could never get enough of. You squeeze him tighter, longing for more closeness which you knew a hug would never satisfy. You could feel his racing heartbeat against your body, could feel his breath on your neck and you started losing yourself in his presence when suddenly he spoke.
He spoke in a soft, sad voice, almost like a whisper only you could hear.

“Noona… what are we doing?”

You could feel your heart start pounding faster. You paused for a bit.
“I don’t know…” you replied just as softly as he had and pulled away from the intimate embrace your goodbye hug had evolved into once again. He kept hold of your hands, keeping you from moving away too far.
“I know you like me just as much as I like you,” he continued.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you quickly said, trying to act oblivious while looking down with a pained expression.

“Don’t lie to me”

You stayed quiet, still staring at your feet,  not knowing what else to say to him. You didn’t dare to look at him because you know seeing his face would worsen the tightness you felt in your chest.
“Noona…” he spoke again. 

“Go out with me.”

Shocked at the sudden unexpected boldness he displayed you looked up at him. His eyes locked with yours, a curious expression on his face, full of determination and longing. His voice was quiet and almost shaky but oddly sure at the same time. You sighed and looked to the side, not wanting to face him for what you were about to say.
“Jungkook, you’re 4 years-”
“I’m not a child!” he snapped, interrupting you before you could finish.

You looked back at him in surprise, locking eyes and you saw frustration written on his face. He mustered you for a second before he suddenly leant in, wrapped his arm around you once again and locked his lips with yours.
Shocked, you didn’t move at first, not quite yet processing that Jeon Jungkook, your beloved Jeon Jungkook was kissing you.
When you finally did, you kissed him back, kissed him deeply, wrapping your arms around his neck. Pulling him closer with one hand while going through his soft silky hair with the other. You could feel him follow your lead, moving a hand to the small of your back, pulling you as close as possible.
The kiss grew more passionate, needier, reflecting how both of you finally fulfilled a long locked up desire, finally got to feel each other’s lips, something you only ever dared dream in secret. 
The intensity of it was overwhelming.
Your mind was blank while your heart was raging.
You didn’t know how a person could possibly contain so many emotions swirling up at once and a tear formed in the corner of your tightly shut eye. You smiled into the kiss as the single tear rolled down your cheek.

As the initial vehemence of the kiss calmed down it grew softer, full of love and fondness for each other as you relaxed a little, releasing your tight grip on him and so did he, his hands now resting on your waist while yours were wrapped loosely around his shoulders.

“Am I still a kid to you, Noona?”
he said out of breath when you finally broke the kiss. He rested his forehead on yours, your noses touching fleetingly. He removed one of his hands from your lower back, moving it up to caress your cheek and stroke your hair while he continued to speak again.
“I know I’m younger than you but I love you Y/N, I only want you, only ever wanted you… You drive me crazy...” The last part was no more than a whisper, and with a soft look in eyes, he leant in for a kiss again.
Only a brief loving peck on the lips this time.
“I know you want to.. so please, date me already”
Your heart was going crazy and for the fist time, your mind wasn’t telling you to stop and back off. This time it said
‘You know what? He’s right. He’s not a kid anymore and you are not weird for liking him. Go ahead.’ You could feel your eyes wet again, happy beyond words that your mind had set you free and instead of replying you kissed him with a smile on your face. 
“Okay kid,”
you said with a chuckle and he childishly pouted at your joke.

“I’ll date you.”

anonymous asked:

I honestly thought this woman was just reading the pin pad screen while I was sacking her stuff because she just said "insert, slide" in a tone that sounded like she was just reading the screen(some people actually do)so I just said "uh huh" nonchalantly and she got mad I didn't tell her which one. My bad I thought you were able to read the screen telling you to do one of those things with your card you were apparently asking me about without forming an actual sentence.

6

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use code FROOT until July 2nd and save some pennies!

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S  H  O  P 

Day Forty-Eight

-An older woman repeatedly tried to hand-write her PIN on the screen rather than use the keypad, despite my subtle suggestions. There is something to be said for a person this determined in their ways that they will not give up. It is not necessarily a wholly positive thing, but something is there to be said regardless.

-A mother described her daughter to me as “a people-watcher.” I had already picked up on this, as she had been staring me in they eye, unblinking, unwavering, peering directly into my soul. She knows things now that I had not known about myself. She holds answers about who I am and why I am here. This young girl could unravel my psyche in a single word. Thankfully, giving her a sticker seems to have won her over. I am safe. For now.

-My offer of a sticker to a young boy was abruptly refused. “I do not want a sticker,” he informed me in a very direct manner. I laid the sticker back down, ashamed of the boy. Moments later, he whispered, “Actually, I think I changed my mind.” I knew that he would come around. I handed him a sticker cheerfully, glad to have recruited another member into my sticker collective.

-I rang up a man with a long and scraggly beard, yellowed around his mouth. I wrote this off as the result of a cigarette habit, but this assumption was dashed as he drew near. I caught the scent of what was undoubtedly the urine of a severely dehydrated person. He carried out his transaction, smiling and humming, surprisingly cheery for a man whose face has just been pissed on.

-An elderly woman purchased a large bag of popcorn after completing her purchase. She then placed this bag upside-down within a plastic bag she seemingly procured out of thin air. She then left the store, entirely unaware of the trail of buttery goodness the hole in the bag left in her wake.

-A man in a security guard uniform strutted through the store with a gait I have only seen in supermodel geese.

-I was informed by an older woman that it was very kind of me to give her her receipt. Her tone had me convinced that this was a genuine sign of gratitude and not just a default pleasantry. It is one of the most basic aspects of my job, but the appreciation means a great deal to me regardless.

-A woman asked me if she could have a discount. I was unable to comply. She then offered my one of her children in return. He seemed to be quite a jokester, but before I was able to sign any paperwork for it, I noticed that my supervisor was next to me and I had to pass up on this offer. I will acquire a jester yet.

-A new man has begun walking laps through the Target doors, entering one and immediately exiting the other, no purchase to be made, no browsing to be done. Is this a new trend? Or a friend? Coincidence? Conspiracy? My journalistic integrity demands that I get to the bottom of this. I may not be a journalist, but I have this integrity nonetheless.

-Taking her receipt, a woman softly said her goodbyes. “Happy days to you,” she whispered, words somehow escaping her motionless mouth. I feel that I have just served some sort of ageless deity on her way out of this world to the next. The only other possibilities I can see are that she has not changed her speech patterns in decades, or she was simply a fan of the Fonz. These seem much less probably, though.

If a card can be debit or credit our machines pop up with the pin screen but also says to press green for credit. My screen showed he wasn’t done with his pin after he pressed enter so I told him to retry and the yellow arrow would take back numbers. He types it in and says"isn’t that it?“ So I turned the pin pad towards me and told him "sir you only have 3 of the numbers in” and he yells “THATS ALL THERE IS!” And shoved the card at me and pointed at the security code. 🙄🙄we did credit but there was only $20 on the card and he pulled out another card for the rest of his total that he had no problems with. So it wasn’t like he’d never used one before.