pigtail-pulling

  • Ron: Pulling her pigtails, what in Merlin's name is that?
  • Hermione: A Muggle saying.
  • Ron: Why would she have pigtails?
  • Hermione: It's not literal, Ronald. They say that a child can harass, insult or physically harm someone because they're secretly attracted to them such as a boy on the playground, pulling on a girl's pigtails.
  • Ron: What? That's ridiculous. It's like saying Harry is attracted to Malfoy.
  • Harry: *sweats nervously*

my fav type of dirkjohn is dirkjohn filled with like… absolutely juvenile, petty, pigtail pulling on the playground levels of bullshit an nonsense

dirk breaks into johns house just to eat his leftovers and to give 5 star ratings to softcore gay porn on john’s netflix account and screw up his recommendation algorithm

john uses his windy powers to get into dirk’s house undetected, and every day for three weeks systematically moves his furniture one quarter of an inch to the left

dirk takes to re-arranging all of the clothes in john’s dresser so he can never find the shirt he’s looking for

john leaves water balloons in dirk’s mailbox which don’t actually accomplish anything but rolling onto the pavement and bouncing away gently and dirk has to go pick them up like a dumbass because its technically littering

dirk leaves a single slice of brooklyn style pizza tucked snugly underneath john’s windshield wiper like a leaflet 

neither of them can explain why they’re doing this or what it accomplishes when prompted, and everyone around them is disgusted at their weirdass 6th grade level black-red flirting

4

I liked this idea that there was this element of what Gally’s doing here. He knows this is kind of how you remember your name - he’s not just being a bully, or “I knew I could beat it out of you” type of thing. There’s a line, I think, originally where he was like “I knew I could get it out of you”. 

- T.S Nowlin