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Sometimes when I cry, I start to cry harder, simply because I am crying.
Or I cry because I know, that in the world somewhere, there are little girls wearing tutus and singing Christmas songs.
Or because Sarah McLachlan comes onto my TV, and tells me about the cats and the dogs that don’t have homes. (Fuck you, Sarah McLachlan).
I cry because on the internet, there are pictures of pigs wearing rain boots, and there are pictures of Sharpay puppies that look like rolled up towels! The internet is great!
Sometimes I cry when cheese is really good, or when I’ve made onions. But that’s just human.
I cry because they call me fat, even though I am fat. Because most of the time, a word is just a word. Until it is not just a word; it is a weapon.
I cry because there is death.
I cry because people die and maybe the last thing they thought of was their children, and I cry because I don’t have children yet.
I cry when there is no end and I cry because there is an end and I cry because you love me so well, because I used to cry alone, because I wanted to die.
And then I cry harder because your shoulder is so soft, because the sunset is so beautiful on the Connecticut river.
I cry because I am scared I am losing my mind, or because I’m on meds, or I’m crying because I forgot my meds, or I’m crying for the fact that maybe I’m not actually myself.
Or I’m crying because I am myself and that doesn’t feel like enough.

MEETING LUCY

So first UP was the q&a and here’s some things I wrote down during it. We weren’t allowed to take videos or audio but I did audio record the end bit of her doing an Australian accent hahaha. She’s literally so fucking funny she had the crowd constantly laughing.

-“I’m 27 I can have beer”
-“I play a teenager or … used to play a teenager” and she looked so sad.
-She’s so fucking excited about hugging a koala
-SHE ASKED ABIUT DREAM WORLD and everyone laughed omg
-She’s gonna miss being around the cast and crew because of the energy. -She still feels depressed about wrapping and doesn’t really know exactly what she’s doing next.
-She asked if we illegally stream pll because she was told it doesn’t air on tv here and then she’s like OOOO NEXTFLIX and everyone laughed bc our Netflix is shit here.
-“I ask troian every day what we filmed last week.”
-She doesn’t remember much about the show privileged and fans were asking a few questions about that and the OC (lmao why)
-Shes gonna set aside some time to just go to Nashville and make new music. In the next year or two.
-Someone asked her about jaria and then PEOPLE WERE SCREAMINGG JARIA. She said she loves Ian and she shut down jaria hahahaha.
-In her head the story continues for Aria and she always thinks about what Aria would be doing next.
-“I’m in Australia they can’t get mad at me” - after she nearly said a massive spoiler omg
-‘Dude’ will be released at Sundance hopefull.
-SHE GOT ASKED ABOUT DATING IAN AND SHE TIP TOED AROUND THE QUESTION and said she used to have a crush on him.
-Ashley was crying when they were digging up a dead body one time (unsure what episode she was talking about) and the bodies are supposed to only be 1 meter under the ground but that day it was like 6 feet under and they were so exhausted after digging so much.
-Lucy is going to send an ezria shirt to this girl who missed out on getting one omg.
-Lie a little better is about someone but she wouldn’t tell.
-She said she’s the closest with Janel out of all of the girls.
-“Y'all just wait and see what they did to Spencer it’s so good”
-Her fave memory from filming was shooting the pilot. She said when they put Ali’s body in the car and they were outside the church she said she looked at Ashley and shay and she knew this show was going to be big.
-She used to leave love letters for Zach Hansen in the woods bc he was her crush when she was younger.
-“She’s a bad GIRL isn’t she” about Aria having lots of boyfriends. She said she wishes she could have been more independent when she wasn’t with Ezra because she wanted to show girls you don’t need a man.
-“There’s so many lesbians in rosewood it’s great”
-“I don’t watch anything I’m in because it makes me really uncomfortable”
-The weirdest things she did on pll was holding a cow tongue, having a rat jump on her and the dead pig in the boot.
-Her favourite outfits for Aria were in season one bc they were the weirdest.
-She wasn’t allowed to keep any of Arias clothes or anything because they’re going to be kept in a warner brothers vault and can be used in other shows etc.
-Someone asked are you in any other fandoms and she said “here’s a fun fact I’ve never seen or read Harry Potter. Is there like a Netflix fan club??? I love Disney movies too”
-Her favourite lines on pll are “Spencer sluttin it up” and “bitch can see”.

She was so cute and did an Australian accent and asked what to eat here etc because food is important to her. She was so curious about fairy bread and she said she tried Vegemite and it was interesting (she hated it).

She is SOOOOO TINY I couldn’t believe it omg and she is soooo beautiful I was in shock.

I had my photo with her and it was extremely quick it was just “Hi” and take the photo quickly and go because there was like 300 people in line. They were surprised how many people were there lmao I don’t think they planned for it to be this big.

Then I had my autograph and I was like “Omg I’m low key dying right now” and she went “Awwww” and I apologized for being so nervous. She then asked me how my day was to take my mind off it I think and I fucking said “I just wanna say thank you because pretty little liars saved my life” and she was like AWWWWW and did the cutest little puppy dog face and then that was it haha.

Everything was so rushed so it was a little disappointing because her flight was delayed and they didn’t expect that many people.

BrittanaCon Prompt Project - 18b

AUTHOR: EVERANDOM

PROMPT: Brittany left to go on tour with [pick a singer] 2 months after they were married & is finally back home. Santana shows her how much she’s missed her.

PROMPTED BY: fbedit19

RATED: M - for sexual content

***This story includes mature themes that are NSFW and not intended for underage audience. Please use common sense and discretion when opening to read.***

TITLE: Nights Without You

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Part One

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