The neural network generated pickup lines that are actually kind of adorable

So it occurred to me that the same neural network framework I’ve trained on recipes, Pokemon, superhero names, and Irish tune names might be able to write pick up lines as well.

Gathering the dataset was much more painful than I had expected - I hadn’t really read many of these before, and most were obscene, or aggressive, or kind of insulting. I began to regret the whole project.

But although the neural network figured out the basic forms “You must be a … because….” or “Hey baby, wanna…” it never learned to generate the worst lines - most of these were based on wordplay that it didn’t have a chance of reproducing. 

Instead, it began to generate lines that varied from incomprehensible to surreal to kind of adorable:

Are you a 4loce? Because you’re so hot!
I want to get my heart with you.
You are so beautiful that you know what I mean.
I have a cenver? Because I just stowe must your worms.
Hey baby, I’m swirked to gave ever to say it for drive. 
If I were to ask you out?
You must be a tringle? Cause you’re the only thing here.
I’m not on your wears, but I want to see your start.
You are so beautiful that you make me feel better to see you.
Hey baby, you’re to be a key? Because I can bear your toot?
I don’t know you.
I have to give you a book, because you’re the only thing in your eyes.
Are you a candle? Because you’re so hot of the looks with you.
I want to see you to my heart.
If I had a rose for every time I thought of you, I have a price tighting.
I have a really falling for you.
Your beauty have a fine to me.
Are you a camera? Because I want to see the most beautiful than you.
I had a come to got your heart.
You’re so beautiful that you say a bat on me and baby.
You look like a thing and I love you.
Hello.

THE SIGNS AS PICK-UP LINES
  • Aries: Are you my appendix? Because I have no idea how you work, but this feeling in my stomach makes me want to take you out.
  • Taurus: Do you have a name or should I just call you mine?
  • Gemini: Spell me. (M-E) You forgot the D. (There isn't a D in me.) NOT YET!
  • Cancer: You look a lot like my future husband, I promise to take great care of you and our kids.
  • Leo: I'd rate you a nine out of ten, only because I'm the one you're missing.
  • Virgo: I may not be photographer, but I can picture you and I together.
  • Libra: You remind me of the sun because you constantly brighten up my world.
  • Scorpio: If I had a dollar for every time I thought of you, then I'd only have one dollar because you never left my thoughts after the first time.
  • Sagittarius: You must not of took your vitamins today because you look like you're lacking in vitamin me.
  • Capricorn: If you were a triangle, you'd be a right triangle because you're ALWAYS right!
  • Aquarius: I'm good at math ok. U + I = 69, and the value of I is 59 because U are a 10.
  • Pisces: You must be a masterpiece because I want to pin you up against a wall and admire you whenever I see you.
Shit Slytherins Say on Valentine's Day: #5
  • Gryffindor: "I think I could make you very happy."
  • Slytherin: "Why? Are you leaving?"
  • Draco: Nice robe, Granger
  • Hermione: Even if I got it at 50% off? Isn't that too cheap for you?
  • Draco: Well, I'd like them better if they were 100% off
  • Hermione: Stores can't just give away clothes for free, Draco
  • Draco: ... That's not what I meant
  • Hermione: *not listening* That would be an awful way to run a business
  • Draco: ... *gives up*
10

as you wish, anon and @bokutothekid <3

“Don’t know what position you play in quidditch, but you look like a keeper ;^)”

//I would like to thank my dear potterhead friend for that pickup line

PREVIOUS - YOI HP AUs

bonus: he strikes again!!

7

Sam: “hey Y/N, my love for you is like my hair: it just keeps growing and growing”

Y/N: “sammy, what’s happening….. What are you talking about?”

Dean: “nice try Sammy but what Y/N needs is something more straightforward. So what do you say Y/N, how about we exorcise our demons tonight?”

Y/N: “oh god it’s valentine’s day today isn’t it”

Castiel: “I’m not entirely sure what a valentine is but please consider fulfilling this position for me”

Y/N: “Cas not you too!”

Gabriel: “don’t worry Y/N but I need your help”

Y/N: “if this is one of those stupid pick up lines….”

Gabriel: “no no, but Y/N you’re the only fix for my sweet tooth”

Y/N: “I got to admit that one was pretty good”

Crowley: “wait till you hear mine”

Y/N: “I think I’ve heard enough today”

Crowley: “ah come on Y/N, I deserve to be loved”

Lucifer: “if you get tired of these idiots you could always sacrifice yourself to me”

Y/N: “you guys are insufferable”

Dean: “only for you Y/N. Now let’s gonna get you some pie”

  • Scorpius: Dad, Grandpa, I need some help.
  • Draco: Yes, of course.
  • Lucius: Sure, what do you need?
  • Scorpius: Well... I was thinking that I could read you some pick up lines to try and get Albus' attention.
  • Draco, muttering: Of course, Potter...
  • Lucius: Shut up, Draco. Read them out, Scorpius.
  • Scorpius, sweating: Uh... Did you survive the Killing Curse? Because you're drop dead gorgeous!
  • Draco:
  • Lucius: ...Might make him think you're after his father? Try another one.
  • Scorpius: How about... Wanna open my Chamber of Secrets?
  • Lucius: Uh–
  • Scorpius: Ooh! or — Hagrid's not the only giant on campus!
  • Draco: SCORPIUS
  • Lucius: Do you have anything less forward??
  • Scorpius: ...Let's have a wand fight at Midnight?
  • Draco: Doesn't work.