pets liz

cee3p0  asked:

Prompt: jack has never had a problem woth spending money so hes too easily influenced to buy everything advertised on tv. When bitty comes back to their shared apartment to 30 chia pets he is both bewildered and highly amused.

What’s your favorite animal?

Bitty’s eyebrows pull together in confusion at Jack’s text.  He’d been sitting at his desk, studying for his French final, when his phone had vibrated against the wood next to his hand.  He types out his answer, and it’s barely gone through before his phone is already buzzing with Jack’s response.

Señor Bun would be offended that you even have to ask.

Soooo bunny then.

Yes.  Why?

No reason. :)

Bitty narrows his eyes at the screen, but the corners of his mouth twitch.

I’m sure.  Dork.  

He sets his phone back down and continues to go over his notes, a small smile on his face.

When Bitty walks out of his last final–European History, which he probably only did okay on, shh, don’t tell Jack–he’s got a fully formed plan in his mind.  He rushes back to the Haus, throws an overnight bag together, and leaves a note on the fridge telling the others he’ll be back Sunday to get the rest of his stuff before heading home for the break, and that there are five pies to tide them over while he’s away.

Jack isn’t expecting him until Friday, and it’s only Wednesday, but Bitty doesn’t think he can wait that long, not when all of his exams are finished and he’s got nothing left to occupy his brain space other than the thought of Jack Zimmermann’s stupid handsome face.  So he’s going early, and Jack will just have to deal.

The drive is an easy 45 minutes, and Bitty cranks up the volume on the radio and rolls down the windows, feeling light and happy and a bit like his heart might burst out of his chest when he sees Jack.

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Pet AU

So… I did a thing a while back and made an AU where some characters are pets and I have no place for it on my blog because I’m a weinie who’s scared of what people who follow me may think 😰 I hope you don’t mind me dumping them here…

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Adventures in Pretending To Be Normal

Episode 10; I have a camera.

1) This is my bedroom door.

You may have noticed there is a sheet over my bedroom door. This is because of idiots. Idiots who believe that bedroom doors need windows.
(Pro-Tip; Bedroom doors do not need fucking windows. Idiot.)

The window is also missing a few panes of glass (cause you know if you’re going to put a window in a bedroom door, it’s not like you have to put a window there or anything…). Sometimes my sister likes to come up to my door and reach her arms through the empty pane to get my attention. Which is extra special and fun when I’m sleeping.
(God damnit Liz)

Sometimes my sister will stand on the other side of my door, and call for me. When I open the door, she will tell me “No I wanted to speak to you through the window!”. Then I have to close the door, move the sheet aside and have a conversation with my sister through the broken window in my bedroom door. She is 27. I am 28.
This is what family does for one another.

2) My neighbors have a pool in their backyard, which is visible from my bedroom window. Everyday as the temperature creeps past 80* they throw their kids in there and leave them for the day. My cat Dinosaur, on days like this, sits up on my head board and watches this godless act unfold. Knowing that he cannot escape this house, knowing that even if he could he is only a cat, that he lacks the strength to pull those poor abused baby humans from their soaking wet fate, he watches in abolute horror.
Nothing I say can console him.

3) My sister had me go with her to one of those new agey crystals and incense shops today. They were selling a line of ‘room sprays’ designed to invoke archangels. I did not have enough money on me to buy the Gabriel invoking air freshener, but I’m going to go back once I get paid to ask if they have some kind of money back guarantee.
Because I totally need that stuff.
Because of reasons…
Very very super important reasons.


Imagine Sans adopting a new pet: Liz the Lizard. Only to have it be driven nuts by the small of KETCHUP and when it runs into him, it cause a great TICKLE CHAOS! Thus, Sans invents the stupidest dance moves while Alphys be trolling and recording this.

…. Yeah, yeah, yeah, a VERYYYY bad idea if he ever tries it :3