peter i actually can't with you

  • Wade: I missed you so much, it felt like I was counting stars
  • Peter: You can't actually count missing someone. It's not quantifiable.
  • Wade: I thought you ate dick, not a dictionary

anonymous asked:

I know that Kevin Feige said that Michelle won't actually be MJ but considering she straight up called herself MJ, and like you said you can't just reference a character as big as MJ, I've decided that Kevin is stupid and I've decided to ignore him. Anyway got any headcannons for Peter and MJ being cute about her new red hair?

okay one day mj decides she’s really bored, and when mj gets bored she gets kinda reckless. she decides that it’ll be really fun to dye her hair bright ass red, and she goes to the store and buys a cheap shitty box of dye that is sure to damage her hair, but she really can’t be bothered to care

and halfway through mixing the dye she realizes she totally forgot to get gloves, and she really doesn’t want to run back out to the store, so she texts peter and asks him to bring gloves. it’s a weekend so he can just spend the night.

and peter shows up all happy and peppy and he drops his bag onto the floor and begins talking about how he had to web up some bad guys on his way there, and he looks adorable and mj kinda just gazes at him until she notices something is missing

“did you buy some disposable gloves on the way over here??”

peter stands there for a moment, and mj already knows the answer before he groans and kicks his bookbag, “no, fuck, i’ll run back out really quick and –”

“nah, peter, it’s midnight and if you go back out you’ll just get distracted by more spidey stuff, it’s fine”

peter bats his eyes at her sheepishly. “but won’t your hands get all red from the dye?”

mj shrugs and walks into her bathroom, peter follows and sits on the edge of the bathtub and looks up at her. “i don’t mind if my hands get all red, i guess. it’ll look like blood.”

“okay even if that was a normal reason to be okay with having red hands, don’t you have that job interview at mullaney’s on monday? no way the dye will be off your hands by then”

mj groans and leans against the wall, glaring at the hair dye. “this was a bad idea.”

“no no no no, don’t chicken out now!! it’ll look so cool, mj, we just gotta figure some…thing….”

and then suddenly peter is up, rushing past mj and rooting through his bookbag, throwing pencils and notebooks out of his way

“uhhhhh, weirdo?? what are you doing??”

“i have the perfect gloves after all!! well, maybe not the perfect gloves, but –” and then peter triumphantly pulls out his spider-man gloves, and grins slyly at mj. “they’re red gloves.”

mj raises an eyebrow. “stark will kill you.”

“stark never has to know. now do you have any clothes i can put on so i don’t stain mine?”

and that’s how mj finds herself sat in her bathroom, while peter hovers over her wearing his boxers and her old band camp t-shirt, slathering her head and his spider-man gloves in red hair dye. peter is whistling and mj feels herself nodding off, she can’t wait to wash this stuff out of her hair and go to sleep

they have to wait 30 minutes for the dye to work, peter spends the whole time rambling about this new villain with octopus arms and his new job at the daily bugle

“i can’t believe you’re actually getting paid to take glorified selfies you fucking –”


“oop, hold that insult, mj. that’s the timer, go take a shower.”

she punches his shoulder on the way to the bathroom, and then lets herself soak in the hot water streaming down on her. red pours down the drain as if she’s just gotten back from a murder and is cleaning off the evidence. when she walks out of the bathroom she shakes out her wet curly hair that now is as red as peter’s suit.

“so? what do you think.”

peter is sitting on the floor, and sleepily blinks at her with doe eyes. he smiles dreamily. “you look like a bottle of ketchup. a beautiful bottle of the finest ketchup known to mankind. oh how i wish i could be a french fry and –”

“i hate you. now get in bed.”

peter yawns and starts to move to the bed. “mj i thought we were saving ourselves for marriage?? you can’t steal my virginity from me, what would god say?”

“if god is gonna ask anything first he would wanna know why he doesn’t exist”

peter falls into the bed, already half asleep, and moves over so mj can lay next to him. he hugs one of her pillows to him, and hums happily as mj plops down next to him and turns off her bedside lamp.

“love you, mj.”

“love you too, pete.”

Another Day In The X-Men Mansion
  • Quicksilver: Guys...I can hear the hotness of food, it speaks to me.
  • Charles: You can't hear hotness Peter, don't be daft.
  • Erik: Can you hear me, Charles?
  • Charles: Of course I can hear you, Erik.
  • Erik: Exactly.
  • Charles: ...
  • Quicksilver: ...
  • Quicksilver: What the fuck, Dad.

[image description: The Sciencelings drawn in a green/brown/yellow palette. Rhodey stands in the center with his leg braces on and his arms crossed. Lila leans against his side, mirroring his crossed arms. Harley is crouched on the other side, tongue out and doing a “rock on” sign with his hands. Peter stands behind Harley and Rhodey doing… nothing in particular, actually. Whoops… Love you, Pete~]

“On Wednesdays we wear green.”

Both an experiment in color and a tribute to Rhodey’s beautiful green polo~

  • Wade: You know what, Weasel. I can't do this anymore. I can't keep pining after Peter! I have to tell him. What have I got to lose?
  • Weasel: Your dignity? Possibly a couple of teeth.

rex glass: cool, suave, dangerous, flirtatious homme fatale

duke rose: friendly, bubbly, slightly naive

peter nureyev: melodramatic, wonderstruck, excitable, affectionate lovebird 

DOCTOR BOO-HOO: Think about it: an actual, grown-up, newspaper-reading *adult* sat down to write this letter. This angry letter. About a fictional alien being played by a woman.

Can't Help Falling In Love | Peter Parker

requested: yes, but i kinda failed it i am so sorry i will do another one thats actually true to the song!

pairing: peter parker x reader

summary: supposed to be off the song can’t help falling in love with you but i kinda got side tracked I deeply apologize.

warnings: one swear word?

Peters heart dropped.
You stepped off the stairs. You were wearing a long black satin dress with a slit up the side and strappy black heels. Your hair was curled meticulously and your lips were ruby red.
Peter could hear his heart pounding, and had no clue what to do. You looked beyond breathtaking. He wore a black tie suit. You were both going to your friends birthday dinner. The friend had insisted on going somewhere fantastically fabulous, naturally. Peter offered to drop you there and back and being best friends you obviously said yes.
Peter stood there gobsmacked staring at you.
“ready” you asked as you gave him a weird look. God, Peter looked so handsome in his tux.
He smiled weakly and took your hand and walked you out of the lobby and to his car.
Soon you were speeding through the streets. Just you and Peter. The way its always been. Peter was hopelessly falling in love with you, and you were hopelessly falling in love with Peter. The two of you however were so defiant in admitting your feelings for one another. So you sat in comfortable silence while the music played, staring at each other when the other would look away. The very definition of longing.
Soon you were at the restaurant and were separated.


You got back into the car and Peter pulled away from the restaurant.
“so everyone seemed to be have enjoyed themselves” you said, drumming your fingers on the side of the window.
“yeah I guess” he sighed, the entire night he hadn’t been able to talk to you, constantly pulled off to talk to other people. And seeing you look like that, and being unable to touch or even talk to you had killed him.
“you seemed to be having a lot of fun with Lauren” you shrugged. Peter looked at you, confused. “I just mean you guys seemed to be hitting it off”you tried to casually joke, even though it hurt you. Peter heard the strained joke and couldn’t shake it off.
As soon as you pulled up to your apartment building you got out and started walking into the building. To your surprise Peter came after you. He called out your name. You slowly turned around and stopped.
“What?” you frowned, had you left something in the car?
“I- I have no interest in Lauren” he stuttered. Your heart soared. however, you obviously couldn’t let Peter in on your emotions.
“ok?” you asked, feeling panic rises in your throat. Had he figured out what he meant to you? even though you had tried your hardest to ignore it? to stop it? to end it?
“well, i just, it seemed like you cared” he shrugged stepping closer to you.
“well, i don’t” you stepped away “it seems like you do” he stepped closer
“well I don’t” you argued pulling farther away from him. “hey, hey calm down” he said, reaching out for your arms. You let him take your hands and pulled you into a deep hug. You slowly relaxed into him and felt a weight lift.
Suddenly Peter pulled away.he stared at you intently with a harsh intensity. He looked at you and raised a hand to his mouth and then ran it anxiously through his hair.
“I can’t do this anymore” he whispered, still staring at you. “can’t do what Peter” you asked, completely stunned.
“this” he hissed, gesturing between the two of you and throwing his hands up in the air,, walking in circles. You could see his eyes starting to fill up
THIS” he yelled. “i can’t look at you and hug you and pretend i don’t feel something, pretend I’m not falling in love with you. Because I am. I have been for so long. and it kills me that I can’t say anything because it may risk our friendship. Fuck I can’t do it anymore. it’s killing me. And its not like i haven’t tried to stop it. Ive tried to pick apart your every flaw but it just doesn’t work. I just can’t help it. I- I just can’t help falling in love with you.” he trailed off at the end. you didn’t think, didn’t say anything. You just ran right into him and kissed him, kissed him with everything you had, to make up for all that time you had spent hiding your feelings. you felt Peter kiss you back with the same fierceness. Peter pulled away slowly, your noses still just touching and foreheads resting against each other, with his arms now wrapped around your waist.
“Peter Parker, for some reason, I can’t seem to stop falling in love with you either.”

  • Mr Douglas: You'd have made a fine Nazi Youth.
  • Scott: There's just one small problem with that. I'm Latino.
  • *from behind a tree*
  • Theo: And he's probably actually gay!
  • Malia: Or at least bisexual!
  • Peter: But mostly gay!
  • Scott: Thanks guys, I love you to.
  • Theo: And he usually can't fight worth shit!
  • Malia: And his face is asymmetrical!
  • Peter: And I bit him so if by chance he happens to kick your ass I want full credit for it!
  • Scott: Actually, having no pack sounds great right about now.

lucidperception  asked:

hihi i saw your recent art of tony steve and peter all smushed together and I was wondering if you still take requests.. i know this is weird and I feel like I'm the only one who ships it,,uhh,,peter and tony?? I don't know, I think they're cute together I'm crying I can't find anything about them anywhere, just a few fanfics no fanart ;-; I don't even think there's a ship name ironspider spideriron?? no idea im just suffering tryna find fanart abt them nd I saw ur drawing and freaked out ffjdj

Don’t worry man, I’ve got you LOL

I was actually hoping the ship would get more popular after the movie, but I don’t think it was that successful HAHA I call it SpiderIron btw //// (I love bottom!Tony o(-(;;)

Here’s my little contribution even though it’s not as romantic as you were prob hoping for roflmao

Originally posted by septodragon

I saw a spidey underwear set, red and blue webbed with his mask on the right cup and just imagine if Peter walks into your room (or flies through the open window) and sees you standing by your dresser in that. he’d just. faint. actually probably choke, stutter, trip and fall on his face, crazy hand gestures all within seconds, then pass out. you can’t help but giggle at the poor unconscious boy on your floor



I guess I’m done. And we never happened.

I’m not one for words, but they’re coming now. I don’t believe in fate, or destiny, or horoscopes but… I can’t say I’m surprised things turned out this way. I always felt there was something kind of pulling me back to darkness. Does that make sense? But I wasn’t allowed a real life, or a real love. That was for normal people. With you, I thought, ah. May be, just may be. But I know now that was a false glimmer. I’m used to those. They happen all the time in the desert. But this one got to me. And here’s the thing. This death, this end of me is exactly what should have happened. I wanted the darkness. I fucking asked for it. It has me now. So don’t put a star on the wall for me. Don’t say some dumb speech. Just think of me as a light on the headlands, a beacon, steering you clear of the rocks. 

I l o v e d you.

Yours, for always now,


a few seconds before one of them forgets the other. possibly all of their true feelings summed up right here.

MBTI types as ''The Room''quotes
  • INFJ:
  • ''...Are you ready to see reflections of your life?''
  • ''Peter, you always play psychologist with us!''
  • INTP:
  • ''Oh man, I just can't figure women out. Sometimes they're just too smart. Sometimes they're flat-out stupid. Other times they're just evil.''
  • ''What are these characters doing here?''
  • INFP:
  • ''I'm tired, I'm wasted, I love you darling.''
  • ''Nobody wants to help me. And I'm dying.''
  • ENTP:
  • ''That's the idea!''
  • ''She was beautiful, but we had too many arguments.''
  • ISFP:
  • ''Oh, actually Johnny, I got a, I got a little bit of a, tragedy.''
  • ''Johnny: Why? Why is this happening to me?
  • [pulls out a pistol]
  • Johnny: God forgive me.''
  • ISTP:
  • ''You don't understand anything, man.''
  • ''Your point of view is so different from mine.''
  • ESTP:
  • ''Denny: I'm okay!
  • Claudette: What's okay? He's taking drugs.''
  • ''She's beautiful. She looks great in her red dress. I think I'm in love with her.''
  • ESFP:
  • ''This is a great party, you invited all my friends, good thinking.''
  • ''Anyway, how is your sex life?''
  • ESTJ:
  • ''Yeah, I'm thinking of moving to a bigger place, man. I'm making some good money.''
  • ''I feel like I'm sitting on an atomic bomb waiting for it to go off!''
  • ISTJ:
  • ''Denny, two's great, but three's a crowd!''
  • ''They betray me, they didn't keep their promise, they trick me, and I don't care anymore.''
  • ISFJ:
  • ''Anything for my princess!''
  • ''Mike: Did you, uh, know... that chocolate... is the symbol of love?
  • Michelle: Mmm... feed me''
  • ESFJ:
  • ''I'm so happy I have you as my best friend, and I love Lisa so much.''
  • ENTJ:
  • ''I have a problem with Lisa. She says that I hit her.''
  • ENFJ:
  • ''People are people. Sometimes they just can't see their own faults.''
  • ''If everyone love each other, the world would be a better place to live in''
  • ENFP:
  • ''...And she loves you too, as a person, as a human bean!''
  • ''Shit… Alright?''
  • INTJ:
  • ''Don't touch me...get out''
  • ''I'm just sitting up here thinking''

smolspiderchild  asked:

What about the scene in Homecoming where Peter takes off the suit and you see his chest? Headcanon for that please because I love trans Peter and I can't think of anything. Lmao Maybe he's already had his surgery, but how young can you even do that? ;-;

I actually made a post about this already, link here.

there are a lot of different ways you can explain his chest! my personal headcanon is that peter started hormone blockers when he was 13. he has a bit of breast tissue, but it’s not very visible because he’s such a skinny dude. 

if he wears baggy clothes (which he does a lot) he can get away with not binding. the only time he really binds is while he’s in his spider-man suit, which tony put a special binder into. it’s very comfortable.

i think peter would wait to get top surgery until his body has grown a little more. when he’s older, tony pays for his (keyhole) top surgery as a high school graduation present. 

anonymous asked:

I've been following you for months, and something as been irking me; you look alarmingly like someone I know but I just can't figure out /who/. can I also point out that you're hella beautiful? it's followers hit on jess day today, i think. but i can't get over how pretty you are like wtf.

(( OOC: Is it the Peter Pan guy? Because I get told I look like him ALL. THE. TIME.

Originally posted by straightillmorning

Otherwise, I’m not gonna object to a day where everyone hits on me. Just don’t… actually hit me. I’ll cry get really mad. ))