pete and pete gif


“I feel all weird and woozy-like…”

“Is it a kind of tingly feeling right around here?”


“Kind of soft and fuzzy?”

“Yeah, sort of.”

“Sounds like the Christmas spirit to me.”

“Nah, nah… It’s just a little heartburn. I gotta lay off the salami.”

“Nope. Definitely the spirit.”


“T’was the day after Christmas, and all through the house
The spirit had ended, it had all been doused.

The ornaments were yanked from the tree with despair
While Dad vacuumed pine needles… from his rump.”


The Christmas spirit was stronger than ever, but not for everyone. As Pete was about to find out, all was not joyful and triumphant.

“Hands off the tree or I’ll decorate!”

“Son, let’s be reasonable. This old, dried out, shedding.”

“I could say the same about you.”


“Haven’t you heard? It’s still Christmas.”

“Right! It’s, uh… jingle all the way.”

“Really? Is that so? Because I hadn’t heard that. No, what I’ve heard up and down this street is the snapping, crunching, grinding sound of Christmas being slowly and painfully crushed to death.”


“Let go, pus bag!”

“Not until I turn Christmas into sawdust, you eggnog-sucking, tinsel-nosed elf!”

“No one talks trash to my son!”

“Hey, we had a deal, Wrigley.”

“Deal? What deal?”

“Son, I thought it was time to give up the tree and move on, but now I can see what’s going on… evil! Now let go of my son’s tree!”