“What’s this?” Levi squints at the grocery receipt, because if Levi is anything, he’s thorough. Nothing slips by their finances. He’s in the off season, and they’re living off of savings and Erwin’s salary. There’s a reason for the organized coupon folder. Each tab is an aisle, sorted then by expiration date and coupon type. He makes sure they only go to grocery stores that double them, has loyalty cards to all of the local chains. They have a stockpile large enough to live on for six months, because it’s a real possibility. Teachers don’t make much either.
Levi grabs his highlighter, fluorescent pink and wide tipped. He streaks it across the line item, and then pushes it across the table toward Erwin. “That.”
Erwin leans over, sticking a piece of toast into his mouth as he skims across the receipt. “Let me see… Oh… Oh.” He looks up at Levi, his cheeks growing noticeably red.
“I know what it is.”
“I should have asked.”
“Yes, you should have.” He takes the receipt back and files it into his monthly budget folders. “I have a coupon.”
“Are you mad?”
“I’m confused.” Levi motions Erwin to come closer, and like a good husband, he obeys. Running his hands through Erwin’s hair, hair that is already styled and sticky with pomade, he tugs stiffly at the roots to pull him in for a closer look. Eyes narrow, fingers curling and piling strands of hair about like a big nest of yellow straw. “How can you tell?”
“I already used it.”
Levi pulls on Erwin’s hair, makes Erwin whine against hair that threatens to be pulled out. “But you’re blond. Blond as the fuckin’ sun. How could you tell you were go–”
Erwin pulls aways even though his hair is still tangled in his husband’s fingers. “I’m going to be late.”
“No no no.” Levi gets up and follows. He’s a whole foot shorter than Erwin, but he nearly climbs on top of him to continue combing his hands through his hair. “Are you really going grey?!”
“Stop it, Levi!” Erwin tries to shoo him away, nearly trips over his feet as he tries to pry his small husband off of him.
“I can’t believe you give a shit!” Levi says, finally giving Erwin a rest. He stands in the foyer entrance as Erwin slips on his work shoes. He crosses his arms and plays with the plush fuzz on his robe. “You know I don’t care, right?”
“Yes, I know that.” Erwin doesn’t look at him. He stands up and looks at himself in the mirror above the entryway table. He tries to push his hair back into place, but can’t seem to get a few of the strands to stick down. Sighing, he grabs his leather satchel and slings it over his shoulder. “I’ll see you tonight for dinner, darling.”
Erwin turns to go for the door, but Levi tugs his arm back so hard that he spins into his arms. They nearly stumble into the stairs, but Levi is a dancer–he has enough muscle for the both of them. He pulls Erwin down, kisses him deep, mussing his hands in his husband’s hair again, smiling coyly against his lips as they part. “Old men are kinda sexy, you know.”
“Lee.” Erwin groans.
“You’re stuck with me, babe. Just like I’m stuck with you.”
“This isn’t helping.” But Erwin’s smiling. He pecks Levi’s lips and nuzzles his nose against his cheek.
“I don’t ever want to see hair dye on our grocery list again, you hear me?”
“Good.” Levi pushes himself away, waits for Erwin to turn before slapping a broad hand across his ass. “Don’t rob any cradles with your geriatric good looks.”
“I hate you.”
“I love you.”
They smile at each other. Erwin puckers and blows a kiss as he leaves out the door, and Levi catches it tightly in the palm of his hand and sticks it in the pocket of his robe.
“We all need to be here for one another. Stop holding grudges. Stop allowing society to mold how YOU live your life. I wake up every day and I tell myself that I am a world changer. Regardless of your religious beliefs. Regardless of your past. Regardless of what you did 20 minutes ago. TODAY, RIGHT NOW, is a new day, a new moment in your life that you can do something. Let’s stop living for ourselves and start living for one another. YOU are a world changer.”
Cute Lumberjack’s Daughter, the snapchat series inspired by my gay self looking extra gay, and deciding to wear a flannel, boxy sweater, paperboy hat, and lumberjack boots. There are more of these… somewhere.
I woke up in the arms of MWW - and I mean that literally, which is something that I love about him - he loooves to hold me, especially while we sleep. He caressed my face and kissed me before turning over so I could spoon him and held my hand. We lay in bed for hours this morning just cuddling and talking and ugh we are getting more and more vulnerable with each other every day it makes my heart so happy. I’m falling hard and fast and it’s different than anything I’ve done before, anything I’ve felt before. I wish we communicated more often about “us” but at the same time I think it helps me be less codependent and get triggered into borderline spirals less often. It feels nice to not feel like I’ll be judged for something (anything) I say or any part of my past I reveal to him. He understands me when I talk to him and he understands bipolar disorder as a legitimate illness and understands mental health and dealing with stuff and he just has such wonderful coping mechanisms and is so healthy and yeah I’m falling.
I came home and took care of Morgan and took my meds and made myself food (!!!!!!) for the first time in a really long time. I dropped my summer class and added a different one (and i want to add a third but i need to send an email if i want to get into it) so I’m feeling a little worthless/like I’m failing right now but rationally I know that I made the right choice for a whole bunch of reasons but blah.
Getting back into being a person and being happy and productive and the amazing being that I am 💕
Today is the Birthday of the most amazing person ever, @warmdayswillnevercease . Until I met you I’d never had a friend who made me feel like I’m good enough the way I am. I’d never had a friend who I felt so connected to. You don’t understand how much you actually mean to me. Seeing you smile makes me happy. Seeing you achieve your goals makes me ecstatic. I’m so proud of you and I’m so awed by the fact that you call me your best friend. I don’t know what I did to deserve you but I’ll be forever thankful for the fact that you sat next to me in the third week of classes at YSJ. Happy birthday, human-bumblebee, I love you with all of my heart.
“You got your hands up, You’re rocking in my truck. You got the radio on, You’re singing every song. I’m set on cruise control. I’m slowly losing hold of everything I got. You’re looking so damn hot. And I don’t know what road we’re on, Or where we’ve been from starin’ at you. Girl, all I know is I don’t want this night to end”