what fucks me up (and what i can relate to, because same) is the fact that even though jack is being firm about putting bitty’s needs and happiness first, bitty is still trying to make jack’s career the priority, even after he’s expressed in so many words how he’s feeling and how he’s hurting. like…being in the habit of constantly putting others and their happiness/comfort first, or not wanting to put your own out there for fear of being told they don’t matter and just getting hurt in general, its a really difficult habit to get out of. it can be really frustrating, but i’m so proud of bitty for even being able to put his own feelings out there at all, despite the fact he tried to play them down and take them back afterwards – he’s trying, and thats the first step.
he’s trying, and jack has shown that he’s not going to just let it drop; he’s being firm in the fact that his career shouldn’t be making bitty suffer in any way, and the fact that it is, he’s doing everything he can to find a solution that they can meet halfway with. because it wasn’t bitty dropping an ultimatum that jack should come out (bitty would never try to force jack to come out, anyways, but), that was all jack’s choice. he was so ready to throw that out there, and i’m wondering……
how long has that been in the back of his mind? how long has he been thinking about suggesting that to his boyfriend? for them to come out to their friends?
he wasn’t thinking about hockey at all, in that moment, not really. he was thinking about bitty, and nothing else, just trying to find a solution to this problem they need to tackle together. not just in words, either, but with actions – turning up at the haus at 5AM – and reminding his boyfriend that he doesn’t have to do it alone, that they’re a team, they have each other’s backs – before physically comforting him.
it really shows how serious jack is about bitty, about how much he cares for and loves and is in love with him. bitty might not see the extent of it yet, still can’t quite believe that he’s even worthy of having this, but one day he will.