perfect books of my life

i’m in my prime,
not withering and old.
but i refuse to play
your wicked games any longer.

i know this tether is unbreakable,
but you make me feel like i’m interchangeable.
you drew a target on my heart,
when did this become fatal attraction?

i don’t have the strength,
the energy,
nor the patience
to be held hostage by your love.

so baby please don’t despair
when i say that
i’ve found the courage to
let you go.

you were never meant to be tied down in the first place.

—  believing i could love you was my mistake, c.j.n.
Because at some point you’re going to realise that you’re wasting energy hating her. That it wouldn’t matter if you were prettier, smarter, better in every conceivable way; he’d choose her. He’d choose her because he loves her. And that’s no more her fault than it is yours.
—  (Choose kindness. Always choose kindness).
Gia Quotes for the Signs
  • Aries: "You scare the shit out of people so they can't see how scared you are."
  • Taurus: "And besides, you were the one that always had my heart, you know?"
  • Gemini: "Too beautiful to die. Too wild to live."
  • Cancer: "She was like a puppy. She was like... love me, love me, love me, love me... and I did. I did. I did right away. She was my lover. The only person I really loved."
  • Leo: "I'd tell them that you don't have to be anybody. Because I'd know that being somebody doesn't make you anybody anyway."
  • Virgo: "This is life, not heaven. You don't have to be perfect."
  • Libra: "Dear book, this is another day in my life. A life is like a book. A book is like a box. A box has six sides. Inside and outside, so, how do you get to what's inside? How do you get what's inside, out? Once upon a time, there lived a very pretty girl, who lived in a beautiful box, and everybody loved her."
  • Scorpio: "You were the one, you were the only one, and you were amazing."
  • Sagittarius: "Because, if you let it be about you, then you're screwed, you know? So you have to stay separate from what's happening and you have to be somewhere else. But I don't know where that somewhere else is, you know? Or how to do that."
  • Capricorn: "Life and death, energy and peace. If I stop today it was still worth it. Even the terrible mistakes that I made and would have unmade if I could. The pains that have burned me and scarred my soul, it was worth it, for having been allowed to walk where I've walked, which was to hell on earth, heaven on earth, back again, into, under, far in between, through it, and above."
  • Aquarius: "I know, I know. Life is so disappointing. Here you are. You have arrived. You are here. This is your moment. What do you have? You have pain. You have everything. What do you have? You have nothing. Everything is right, or everything is wrong. It's disappointing, it's confusing. This is life. What can we do?"
  • Pisces: "You know what I think? I think there's a reason for everything. And I think that there's a plan for everyone. And I think that God has a big plan for me. Just not in this life."

Metro Magick by Lorne Cross (2016) - Review

This is a short book, with just 88 pages, so I’ll try to keep this review relatively short as well. Not only is it pretty slim, it’s also smallish enough to easily fit into your bag or backpack or whatever without taking up much space. I personally love to take books with me when I’m out and about, but sometimes these magick tomes can be rather big and heavy. Anyway, I also think this paperback looks stealthy and undercover enough to be read out in public (if that is a concern of yours), on a train, a bus, subway, or cafe without causing suspicion by non-practitioners. 

First of all I’ll say that I really enjoyed Metro Magick. I used to live in the city and have done my fair share of city magick in my time there. And while I am currently living in a small town (village actually) in the country side, that is only a temporary relocation and hopefully I will get back to the big city life sooner or later. I’ve been feeling particularly stuck lately, so I discovered this weird little book just at the perfect period of my life, and it has made me dream of the concrete jungle once again.

The book itself has no writing on the spine, which could prove to be annoying if you have an extensive esoteric library, making it difficult to locate. I’m sure I’m not the only one having problems with disappearing books. Sometimes they seem to have a life of their own, hiding away but also showing up just at the right moment. Yeah, books can be strange. 

I think this might be some sort of print on demand release, or perhaps some other self small print run release, but the actual quality of the book itself is very good. In addition, there is some weird sentence structures here and there, and a lack of proof reading and editing, so it appears a little clunky in some places, but it’s not too bad. Information is still excellent and the points comes across.

It does mention his other book Occult Magick, so perhaps some of this material would benefit from reading that one first, especially if you’re new to these kinds of things it would prove to be helpful, as this is not a beginners manual.  

There is about 9+ spells and/or variations of spells in here, if memory serves me right that is… Thankfully they are given in such a way that it makes it easy to adapt and modify them for your own use, which is always a nice thing. There’s also some cool ideas for magical tools in here too, like using your drivers licence as a wand for instance!

All in all, I highly recommend this for my fellow urban witchcraft and magick practitioners. It’s a quick and fun read, with heaps of inspiration and ideas for you to play with and/or customise for your own modern magical practice.

Here’s a handful of bonus books that you might want to check out if this is your cup of tea magick:

City Magick by Christopher Penczak (2001)
Post-Modern Magick by Seth (2004)
Postmodern Magic: The Art of Magick in the Information Age by Patrick Dunn (2005)

Drunk or sober, it’s always you

-I miss him

You’re still in love with her and she’s still in love with you but neither one of you will admit it. Harsh words caress your skin at night and old memories of why you two never worked play on repeat inside your minds. It’s the only comfort you need anymore, or at least that’s what you tell yourselves. But the kind of love you have for one another is not one you can get rid of with hot showers, new sheets and a different lifestyle. The love you two have is something worthwhile. But you’re both too stubborn to see it.
—  taintedglass
Moments I love:

When the rest of the world is quiet & sleeping.

Insomnia is cherished little except for when: I feel the cool breeze while sitting on the porch up on my little hill. Four deer pop out from the woods, cross the street, & have a little snack of the neighbor’s green lawn. Coyotes yip & yap & howl somewhere in the distance. The train, about a mile away, races down the tracks & the horn goes off & off & off.

I think I will make coffee (with whipped cream & chocolate sauce) & read my book. Life is so simple, so perfect, when the rest of the world sleeps (although I wouldn’t ever wish not to see them all rise in the morning, get the paper from their doorstep, & rub their eyes at the unusual sun).

Your love for each other will always be flawed. It’s these very flaws that make it so perfect.
—  I read this quote today which made me realise that i should never give up.

Look what fabulousness my favourite tall girl in the world @charliebowater got me – now my home can smell like the Buzzard Prince Consort of Terrasen and the Illyrian Baby High Lord of the Night Court! She is the best <3


addicted series // the children // jane eleanor cobalt

20-yr-old college student, cat enthusiast, and daughter of Connor & Rose Cobalt

5. JokerXReader part 3

Anon: Could I request a Joker x Daughter reader? Idk a full on plot for it soo if you can think of anything that would be amazing :)

So that’s the third and the last part of my 5th JokerXReader, I decided to do a third part because this request fitted in that, quite good. :D I hope you like it, Anon. :) <3  

Fifteen years later

„What did you do?! They got her, do something!“, you screamed at your father.

„We can’t do anything right now, we will rescue her, when Batsy is gone and the police doesn’t expect it“, he said with a sinister look on his face, as he watched the police cars driving into the the middle of the night.

„What? You can’t leave her there“, you shouted again.

„Listen!“, your father growled in anger and grabbed you by your wrist.

„Your mother and I got caught so many times, before you were even born. I know what we have to do, now. Do you think I would leave her there, (Y/N)?“

You freed your wrist from the hard grasp of your father, trying to reassure yourself.

It was the first time you were up on a heist like this, with your parents and today of all days Batman showed up and tried to detain your parents.

Your mother wanted your dad to carry you out of this mess and after you were save, he wanted to rescue her, but it was already to late.

She got caught and now you were alone with your dad.

„I’m sorry, dad“, you whispered.

„You know, everything is so fresh and new …“, you said and looked into those cold blue eyes of your father.

The man with the green slicked back hair nodded his head.

„Come on, let’s get out off here, than we decide how to bring your mum back.“

„Okay …“, you murmured.


Mum’s POV

I couldn’t believe it.

Everything was turning out to be good in the end.

J carried (Y/N) out of the club and I was right behind them, but than … my good old dad showed up.

And this time, after so many years now, he knew who fought him.

„Why?“, he asked and I just could look straight against the wall of the visitors room at Arkham Asylum.

„Tell me why, (M/N). Do you already were with him, when you asked me for help, back then? When (Y/N) was a baby and you showed up after five years, just to tell me, that you had a daughter and she can’t live with you, because of your lifestyl?“

„You know the answer, dad“, I said whispering.

„And I can’t talk to you, when your dressed like a complete idiot.“

I looked up and down at him, and all I saw, was this stupid batsuit.

„I’m sorry that you don’t care about a save city or the life of your own daughter-“

„SHUT UP! I do care about my daughter!“, I screamed in anger.

„If you would, then you hadn’t stayed with him, for fifteen years and let him mess her mind up! She could’ve been a normal child with a normal life, but you and Joker-“

„Don’t speak like that about him. He cared about her more than anyone could imagine. And he was a better father, than you“, I said with tears in my eyes.

„What have I done wrong, that you describe me as such a horrible father?“, Batman said.

I could here the pain in his voice, after those hard words.

„Dad!“, I cried out in disbelief.

How couldn’t he see what was wrong all the time, as I was little.

„You weren’t there for me all the time, I needed you. I was always alone, the only one I could talk to, was Alfred, because you were at Work, day AND night! I had big problems, but you never listened to me, because you were too busy, with this fucking city and this ugly costume. That was the reason I decided to leave home. And you wanna know, who listened to me in the end? Yes, right. Your arch enemy. I met him a few weeks, after I left our house. He was in his club and I didn’t know that it belonged to him. He saw me at the bar and asked why I was so sad and that I would look beautiful with a big smile on my face.“

„Quit it!“, he yelled at me.

„Too bad I’m too old for grounding me, right dad? Instead of that you send me back to Arkham, like always. Does it bother you, that you caught me so many times, not knowing that it was me, all the time? Cause I always wondered about it, that you didn’t realize your own daughter was under this mask.“

„I could help you …“

„Like you always helped me? No, dad. I’ve chosen my way. And I can’t be the girl again, I was, before everything got out of control. I like being what I am now, even if no one could ever understand it. I have a man who loves me, and I have a wonderful daughter. We’re not a picture book family, we will never be perfect. But that’s why I love my life so much. Nothing is perfect, but we’re as happy as we can be, ‘cause we have a lot to laugh about.“ 


„When do we get her out of this, we waited two weeks now. What if they’ve done something to her?“, you said again.

Your father got more and more imaptient with you, even if he loved you.

„(Y/N), be so kind and shut the fuck up just for three seconds. I already have a plan. I will get her out tonight and you will wait here, till I brought her back“, he said.

„What? No! I want to come with you, dad!“

„No“, Joker said with a strict voice.

„Why not? I’m good at shooting people and you know that! You’ve seen me the last time“, you comlained.

He rolled his eyes.

„Yes, and I’ve also seen how you got caught, before I rescued you. You are good with guns, pumpkin, but you’re not good in escaping. And I can’t be responsible for getting your mother out, but instead you will be sent into this hell hole.“

„Someday you can join me or your mother at those things, but by now, you better shut up and play with your guns at your room.“

You were full of rage as your father pointed his hand at your room upstairs.

„I HATE YOU! WHY CAN’T YOU LET ME DO WHAT I WANT?“, you screamed at him.

He grabbed you by your shoulder and pushed you rough into his desk chair.

„What are you doing?“, you asked a little in fear, as he pointed his gold and purple gun at your temple.

„So pumpkin. If I would let you do what you want to, you would get shoot from the police, right here“, he growled.

„And maybe here. Here. Here, and here“, he pointed at your chest, at your forehead, at your ribcage and at your heart.

„And would mummy or daddy be happy about it? No, they wouldn’t. Because the joke, little (Y/N) wouldn’t be only on you, it would be on us too. You understand?“

„Yes …“, you whispered with tears in your eyes.

„Now, go play with your guns. Daddy will bring mummy back“, he said and carried you to the stairs.

Why must he always be like this?

Yes, you weren’t an easy child too wild and stubborn, but he was way too rough sometimes.

That’s the reason you wanted your mother back and of course since you love her.

She was calm with you, no matter what your pighead wanted to do next.

You loved your dad, but sometimes you couldn’t handle his swinging moods and his aggressiv cautious, you always wondered how your mother could handle this for nearly twenty years now.

She loved him, unconditional.

„Pumpkin, I’m going now“, your fathers voice said suddenly a bit more calm, this time.

He was standing in front of your door.

„Okay … good luck“, you said.

„Hey, don’t be mad at me, I just don’t want you to get hurt. Come on, give daddy a big smile“, he said.

You smiled at him.

He always made you laugh again, even if he wasn’t that nice to you sometimes.

„That’s my girl. I will bring her back, save, I promise“, he said.

„I know.“

He walked out of the hallway.



„I love you.“

„Yeah …“, he said slowly.

„Dad“, you laughed.

„Love you too“, he respond a little more quite this time.

He loved you, but it was awkard for him to admit it, because … he was the Joker, what else could you expect?

But that made you love him even more, he was a great father, even if he was too rough sometimes and even if he couldn’t really say I love you, he cared about you and he showed, that you and your mum were the only people in his life he really needed.


Mum’s POV

Two weeks now.

The food was the worst, like always and everything started to get boring when I was here.

No people to talk.

No J, who cheered me up, no little (Y/N) that bothered me with her cute pighead.

It was late at night and I couldn‘t sleep.

All I thought about was J and (Y/N).

Suddenly the alarm started to rang loudly in my corridor.

The red light reflected on the pane of my cell and gun shots filled the air.

I stood up from my bed to look who wanted to get out of here, but instead of seeing someone who brokes out, I saw people breaking in.

And a few moments later a big smile appeared on my face.

„What took you so long?“, I asked and fell into his arms, after he unlocked the cell I was in.

„Our daughter, drove me crazy“, he said and wrapped his arms around me.

„I’ve missed you.“

„Missed you too, doll.“


 „Mum!“, you shouted in joy as you saw your mother passing the hallway in front of your father.

„(Y/N), honey. I missed you so much“, she said and hugged you.

She looked beautiful as always.

And you were so glad she was alright and nothing happened to her at the Asylum.

„I’m so glad you‘re back“, you whispered.

„Missed my calm way to handle your pighead, huh?“, she asked and you two started to laugh what even your father found quit amusing.