perfect ;~;

5

(x)(x) An update for the wedding! Congrats Matt & Marisha <3.

A first time mother’s fears

Sophie stared out the window absentmindedly, the sewing she had been trying to complete left abandoned in her lap. She felt a sudden movement and looked down at her stomach in wonder. No matter how often she was reminded of it by the flutter of movements, the tightening of her clothes, or her inability to sleep comfortably anymore she still found it hard to believe she was actually growing another human being inside of her. The thought both mesmerized and terrified her. She patted her bump gingerly as if to comfort the soul that was kicking about. She had begun staring out the window again when Gideon entered the room, walking up behind her to place a reassuring hand on her shoulder. There was a time when Sophie would’ve cringed away from the contact, but she had become accustomed to Gideon’s calming presence and always knew when it was him.

She reached up and put a hand over his as he leaned down to kiss her on the cheek. “What are you doing in here alone my love?” He asked. She picked up the half finished baby’s nightdress and showed it to him. “I’ve been trying to finish this, though I can’t seem to concentrate on it. I’m dreadfully behind on the baby’s clothes, at this rate he or she won’t have anything to wear by their third day here.” She frowned at the thought, having grown up with nothing she wanted her baby to have everything. Gideon picked up the unfinished sewing and put it aside before he knelt in front of Sophie. He laid his hands gently on her stomach, speaking softly to it. “Hello in there little one. We’re all very excited to meet you out here.” Sophie stroked his hair lovingly as he did this but couldn’t stop the frown from forming on her face. Gideon looked up and his brow creased in worry at the sight of his unhappy wife.

He reached up and cupped her face, forcing her to look up and meet his eyes. “Sophie, darling, what’s wrong? Are you not excited about our first child?” Sophie cast her eyes back down in response, not wanting to watch her husbands reaction when she told him what had been bothering her. “What if our child doesn’t like me? Doesn’t want me for their mother?” She whispered. Gideon let out a little gasp at her words, shocked at the very idea. “Why would you ask that Sophie? Our child will absolutely adore you, how could you think otherwise?” She continued to look away, afraid he thought her foolish. “Look at me. Look at the scar on my face. It’s a constant reminder of how weak I was, and probably still am compared to the rest of you. What if our child is ashamed of me, because I was born a mundane and not a shadowhunter like their father, and that I am weak because of it?” Gideon couldn’t stand if any longer, he pulled his wife into his arms and held her. He did not speak at once, because while he knew what he wanted to say, he wanted to pick the right words. He knew what a delicate subject this was for his wife. He stroked her hair as she sobbed into his shoulder, unable to hold the tears back any longer.

Finally he pulled back enough to see her face. He gently wiped away the remaining tears with his thumbs as he cupped her face with both hands. “Sophie, my darling, you are the strongest, bravest person I know. Not woman, or shadowhunter, but the very bravest being. The scar on your face, like all the scars that cover our bodies as nephilim, is a testament to your courage. It displays not what you have fallen prey to, but what you have endured and overcome. And it is one of the most beautiful things about you. There is no doubt in my mind that our child will see this too, and grow up knowing what a warrior their mother is, and always has been her entire life.” He looked to his wife’s face to see if she would accept his words and be reassured. She had stopped crying and looked at him. She leaned in and kissed her husband softly on the lips, realizing yet again how fortunate she was to have found such a man. She rested her forehead against his, all her fears having been forgotten with his words and whispered “And what a father our child will have. I love you, Gideon Lightwood.”