peeing the bed

the signs as stereotypical cat behaviors
  • aries: climbing a tree too high to get out of without a firemans help
  • taurus: sleeping 18 hours a day
  • gemini: the quick transition between playing and trying to kill
  • cancer: meowing for no reason
  • leo: "sitting up high makes me feel important" mentality
  • virgo: staring intently at the wall
  • libra: face rubbies
  • scorpio: peeing on your bed
  • sagittarius: randomly determined fast relocation of self (darting from room to room without cause)
  • capricorn: *chatters uncontrollably*!!at birds through the window
  • aquarius: laser pointer location anticipation
  • pisces: vacuum fear
I'm so lazy

I’ve got a story from last weekend. I was being lazy, as I usually am, and I paid for it. I was wearing pink fuzzy socks, white sweat pants, and dark blue panties.
I was really tired and cold last Saturday and I ended up laying down in bed to warm up and maybe take a short nap. I did fall asleep for like a solid 4 hours, yeah I was pretty tired lol. When I woke up I really had to go pee. And when I say I really had to go, I mean like even laying in bed hurt my bladder. I knew I was going to have to get out of bed and pee, but I also knew that when I started moving my bladder might not handle it very well, aaand it was going to be a painful walk to the bathroom. So I decided it would be a good idea to pee a little while in bed to try and help decrease the pain and fullness of my bladder so I could get up easier. I relaxed my muscles and pee almost immediately gushed into my pants. My crotch got hot and I felt trickles of pee run down and onto my butt. It took alot of effort and 5 seconds peeing before I could stop. And as planned I felt alot better and was confident I could make it to the bathroom to finish. As I sat up, I got distracted by a notification on my phone, it was a snapchat and for some reason I stayed in bed and replied to it and others.
Then the next thing I know, I’m waking up a few hours later, I think it was like 2 hours because it was 5 pm when I woke up and the last time I remembered was 3:05pm. My phone was on my chest. “What the hell? Did I fall back asleep?” I thought to myself as I sat up. I pull off my blankets and saw my pants had dried but were stained yellow around my crotch. I lifted my pants to check my underwear, it was dry, and you couldn’t tell they were once wet because they are such a dark blue. And oh boy, when I thought I really had to pee when I woke up the first time, I was wrong. My bladder was bulging and every little movement hurt so much it was getting harder and harder to hold it in. “Shit, I guess I never peed before I fell back asleep. God dang it Kate you are so stupid!” At this point I knew if I tried to pee a little to help relieve the pressure I wouldn’t be able to stop myself very easily..if at all. And I wasn’t in the mood to wet myself and soak my bed.
So I painfully got out from under the covers and came to sitting on the side of my bed. While I was moving I actually forced some pee out and dampend my crotch. I stood up and slowly walked to my door, like one step every 2 seconds. I had to go soooo bad. Standing put even more pressure on my bladder and my muscles were very very weak so I bent over a little bit to try and fight that pain. I made my way out of my room and turned the corner to see the bathroom door was closed.“fuck, really? Someone has to be in it RIGHT NOW?!” And instead of waiting at the door to go when whoever was in it was done(which I clearly should have done) I make the desperate decision to go use the other bathroom upstairs. I turn back around and slowly, and painfully make my way to the other side of the house.
When I got to the bathroom I had to force myself to stand up straight so I could get to the toilet faster. I closed the door and made it in front of the bathtub (the toilet is right next to the tub separated by a wall, so I was REALLY close) when I felt my bladder give in. Pee filled my pants with a loud hiss, my crotch got hot and wet as pee ran down my legs leaving yellow trails in my pants and quickly soaking my socks. Instead of just standing there I rushed towards the toilet, still peeing and leaving a trail of pee on the floor. I sat down on the toilet, fully clothed, and continued peeing. Pee ran into my butt and I felt it getting warmer and wetter. My crotch slowly turned dark yellow with all the pee. I was sitting, peeing my pants on the toilet for 2 minutes. When I had finished I stood up and some pee that had pooled up in my pants ran down my legs and into my socks. I cleaned up the floor and looked in the mirror. My butt and crotch were yellow and you could see my blue underwear. There were yellow lines running down my legs and socks were soaked.
Still low key disappointed I had peed my pants, I changed into clean black panties and black yoga pants. Hope you enjoyed, I know its been awhile!


23 birthday and 13 year anniversary of having type 1 diabetes.
So my diagnosis story.
I was diagnosed 13 years ago in the week of my tenth birthday. I started peeing the bed a lot and it was so embarrassing.
Like all the time. My sisters teased me about it. Then as spring rolled by.
My mother noticed how thin I had gotten.
I had a awesome party planned for my tenth birthday at a pool with slides and water attractions.
I was so excited for it but I was so tired and thirsty all the time. My mom took me to instacare and the doctor just brushed her off, saying that I had strepthroat. Even though my mom reported that I didn’t have strep and my strep test came out negative.
The antibiotics didn’t have any effect and I was getting worse. In my family we have a tradition of a birthday breakfast and my mom made me oatmeal pancakes. She told me if I couldn’t keep my food down then we would have to cancel my party. Well I threw up on my pancakes and my mom sent me back to bed.
I don’t remember a lot of this but my mom put me in her bed to keep an eye on me. I was so weak I couldn’t even walk to the bathroom. And I couldn’t stay hydrated.
My parents were fighting on whether or not to take me to the ER. My dad thought it was nothing to worry about and my mom thought something was wrong.
My oldest sister was watching me and hear me struggling to breath.
My mom put me in the car and rushed to the ER. The ER nurse saw my mom bring me in and I was non-reponsive.
They did a bunch of tests and came out to me mom that my blood sugar was over nine hundred and that I was type 1 diabetic.
I do remember my dad feeding me ice chips and me yelling at him I wanted water not ice. The ER staff gave me the wrong amount of water and it put me in a coma and caused swelling of my brain.
They lifeflighted me to primary children’s hospital.
I woke up with morning sun on my face and the sound of Seagulls. I was so confused and scared. I had a cathader and it was so uncomfortable. I got up off the hospital bed and was like where am I?
I started calling out and a nurse showed up and directed me back to the bed.
She left and came back with my mom.
My mom was crying and I wanted to know what was going on.
They asked me if I knew where I was.
I thought I was in California because of the Seagulls.
But they told me I was in salt lake city.
My mom told me I was a diabetic.
The words had no effect on me, I didn’t understand what it meant.
I didn’t really understand anything. I think I was in shock. They wouldn’t let me leave until my parents were trained for diabetes care. I had lots of tests to make sure there was no brain damage. I was given lots of flowers and stuffed animals. And I chose cheetos for lunch and dinner everyday.
But it wasn’t until on the way home from the hospital when we stopped at Wendy’s for dinner and my mom told me I had to do a shot to eat my food that it really sunk in that diabetes wasn’t going away.

Yep so that was how I found out I was type 1 diabetic. But I’m still here, even though there are times, it would be easier to just give up.
I have made the decision I’m going back to school to become an endocrinologist.
Because I think there should be more doctors who can truly empathize and understand their patients.
My goals is to become an endo and help other diabetics.

Feel free to share your diabetic type 1 and type 2 diagnosis stories. I like to read about them.

A Bed for the Night

A creepy encounter by reddit user tufted_wisdom

When I was about twelve, my great-uncle John came from Ukraine to visit us in Canada.  He had a lot of stories, but this was the one that stood out.

In the late 1960’s, John was traveling by train from his village to another to visit family.  He had to change trains at one point, and was dropped off at what amounted to a platform and a hut in the middle of nowhere.  There was no one else at the station, and other than a dirt road that led off into the surrounding woods, there was nothing there.

Keep reading

It’s fun to spend a few minutes every day in a fantasy world in which Donald Trump is hours away from impeachment, but a fantasy is all that is. There is no grand Putinspiracy to control the White House, and focusing on the idea that there might be means ignoring all the actual terrible, shady shit Vladimir Putin and Donald Trump are getting up to. And while I’ve got zero trouble believing Donald Trump would pay Russian prostitutes to pee on a bed Barack Obama slept in, the idea that a video of such sexcapades is being used as kompromat (blackmail material) by the Russian government is worse than rock-fucking stupid. It’s, like, waiting-until-marriage-to-fuck-a-rock stupid.

Let’s break it down: The idea here is that Trump’s just a puppet of Putin because if he steps out of line at all, ol’ Vlad will send his gross sex tape to Wikileaks or whoever.

First off … does anyone think a sex tape would hurt Donald Trump at this point? Seriously, if video of him being pissed on by a bunch of Baltic hookers leaked tonight, do you really think THAT would be the end of his career? We caught the man bragging about sexually assaulting women to Billy goddamn Bush, and he was still elected president. A sex tape might actually win him some support.

Secondly, the “White House leak” cited in that article? It’s actually just a Twitter account, @RoguePOTUSStaff. The account is purportedly run by stealth rational people hiding inside the Trump administration. There’s no evidence its real. And the pseudonymous tweeter doesn’t even make any direct claims about “blackmail.” They just claim that someone said the president’s behavior was “suspicious” during a call with Putin.

The Left Needs To Shut Up About (Most) Russia Conspiracies

anonymous asked:

Hello! Could you do: waking up to RFA + Unknown? Thank you so much for blessing us with your writing <3

~I’d love to! ^^

{Requests Are Closed}


  • Unless he has something really important to do that day, he doesn’t wake up easily
  • Very cuddly in the morning
  • Lots of morning kisses
  • If you come back into the room to wake him up there’s a good chance he is pulling you back into bed with him
  • Surprises you with breakfast in bed a lot
  • Loves to help you make breakfast
  • But not before he showers
  • He has to shower in the morning
  • And has his own headband or borrows yours to keep the hair from his face while he brushes his teeth and washed his face
  • Likes to drink your morning coffee together out of matching mugs


  • Always awake before you
  • Brushes your hair to the side and kisses your lips to wake you up
  • Loves to shower together in the morning first thing
  • And then you pick out clothes for each other
  • He always has an outfit in mind for you and of course, he needs help with his tie
  • Not a fan of big breakfasts
  • Or breakfast in general
  • But he enjoys that time he can spend with you before going to work
  • So you’ll sit and he drinks some sparkling water and will maybe share some pieces of fruit with you before heading out


  • Surprisingly chipper in the morning?
  • You usually wake up to him pulling you into his chest and kissing the top of your head with a “morning, princess”
  • He loves waking up to you!
  • He has a whole looong beauty routine though so he’s usually in the bathroom taking care of his skin and hair while you cook breakfast
  • He thinks it’s really important to have a nice healthy meal first thing
  • Will feed you fruit in the morning
  • Then kiss you
  • If he doesn’t have to go to rehearsals right away
    he loves to go for a nice morning walk or jog with you to get some exercise in!


  • It’s not that she isn’t a morning person
  • But she can be a little grumpy gills until she gets her morning coffee in
  • You usually wake her up with some kisses and you both roll out of bed
  • It’s always your duty to start the coffee while she showers
  • And then you get her thermos or mug ready for her
  • Likes to have a very simple breakfast, maybe some toast or a bagel with her coffee, while she sits and chats with you to wake up
  • Will talk and plan out your guys’ day and what you have planned


  • A lot of times you wake up to an empty bed tbh
  • He either didn’t come to bed that night or woke up in the middle of the night and is tinkering with something or looking at memes
  • He doesn’t have a normal schedule
  • But if he did stay asleep
  • You’d wake up to his arm around you
  • You would probably have to kiss or tickle him to get him to wake up
  • He says lame jokes when he first wakes up
    • “Ah! I’m blind! I’ll never see my sweet honey’s face again, whyyy”
    • “Put your glasses on…do you have to say this joke every time you wake up?” -_-
  • Picks out clothes from the pile on the floor
  • He will make breakfast on occasion but he really likes your cooking
  • Will find a way to sneak in on you in the shower, and ends up joining you a lot


  • This boy sleeps like a log
  • You wake up every morning to him on top of you or his leg and arm thrown over you (he likes to use you as a sort of pillow at night)
  • He’s cranky
  • Good luck getting him awake or off of you tbh
  • Sometimes if you try to wiggle free he grabs you harder and holds you tight so you can’t leave
  • When he finally does manage to get up, he usually yawns and stretches, ruffles his fingers in his hair a bit and gives you a kiss
  • He doesn’t like breakfast but he eats a few bites at least if you made it
  • Doesn’t bother to dress right away, he walks around in boxers for a bit
  • Likes coffee if he can put a lot of yummy creamer in it (like chocolate or some other sweet flavor)
  • Lives for taking showers together



  • He loves morning!
  • Usually wakes up way before you
  • But he doesn’t bother getting up at all
  • Especially if you’re laying on him
  • He stays so still and just listens and feels your breathing, running fingers through your hair
  • He would get up but he doesn’t want to accidentally bump into something and make noise (which happens often because he can’t see lolol)
  • He’d rather let you sleep and wake up naturally
  • It sucks when he has to pee, though…
  • He showers before bed but he also likes to shower in the morning and then do his hair
  • Lives for the smell of coffee in the morning and you usually make it while he gets dressed or showers
  • Loves to chat with you while drinking coffee and listening to music
  • He smokes his pipe
  • Fan of a light breakfast like a croissant from his favorite bakery

anonymous asked:

Tell us a story about your ex wife. We want entertainment

I trained her dog to pee at the sound of her morning alarm. To this day, her dog still pees in her bed every morning.