peasants all of you

What we really need is an adaptation of the original 1740 The Beauty and the Beast

So were you aware that the The Beauty and the Beast story we all know is a heavily abridged and rewritten version of a much longer novella by Gabrielle-Suzanne Barbot de Villeneuve?  And that a lot of the plot holes existing in the current versions exist because the 1756 rewrite cut out the second half of the novella, which consisted entirely of the elaborate backstory that explains all the weird shit that happened before?  And that the elaborate backstory is presented in a way that’s kind of boring because the novel had only just been invented in 1740 and no one knew how they worked yet, but contains a bazillion awesome ideas that beg for a modern retelling?  And that you are probably not aware that the modern world needs this story like air but the modern world absolutely needs this story like air?  Allow me to explain:

The totally awesome elaborate backstory that explains Beauty and the Beast

  • Once upon a time there was a king, a queen, and their only son
  • But while the prince was still in his infancy, in a neat reversal of how these fairy tales usually go, the king tragically died, leaving his wife to act as Regent until their son reaches maturity
  • Unfortunately, the rulers of all the lands surrounding them go, “Hmm, the kingdom is ruled by a woman now, it must be weak, time for an invasion!”
  • And the Queen goes, “Well, if I let some general fight all these battles for me, he’ll totally amass enough fame and power to make a bid for the throne; if I want to protect my son’s crown, I have no choice but to take up arms and lead the troops myself!
  • (Btw, I want to stress that this woman is not Eowyn or Boudica and nothing in the way her story is presented suggests that she had any interest martial exploits before or in any way came to enjoy them during these battles.  This is a perfectly ordinary court lady who would much rather be embroidering altar covers for the royal chapel and playing with her child until necessity made her go, “Oh no, this sucks, I guess I have to become a Warrior Queen now” and she just happened to kick ass at it anyway.)
  • And the Queen totally kicked ass, but the whole “twice as good for half the credit” thing meant that no matter how many battles she won, potential enemies refused to take her and her army seriously until she had defeated them so no sooner would she fend off one invasion than another one would pop up on a different border.
  • So she spent the majority of her young son’s life away from the castle leading armies, but it was OK because she left him in the care of her two best friends, who just happen to be fairies!  This was an awesome idea because a) fairies have magic, and therefore are like the best people to protect the prince from any threats and b) fairies consider themselves to be so above humanity that the lowest fairy outranks the highest mortal, so they’d have no interest in taking a human throne.  Good thing they were both good fairies instead of one good and one evil one!
  • (Spoiler:  they were not both good fairies.)
  • So the two fairies basically take turns raising the prince until he’s old enough to rule.  And on the eve of his twenty-first birthday, the evil older one comes into the prince’s bedroom.
  • “So listen, kid.  You’re about to become king, your mother’s on her way home from the war to see you crowned, and I have a third piece of good news for you!  You see, I’ve actually been spending so much time here lately because Fairyland’s become a bit too hot to hold me for reasons totally not related to me being secretly evil.  And if I have to hang in the human world, I might as well reside in the upper echelons of it, so even though as a powerful fairy I completely eclipse your puny human status in a staggeringly unimaginable way, since you’re about to be king and since my premonition that I should stick this whole guardianship thing out because you would be hot one day has totally proved accurate (go me), I will graciously lower myself to allowing you to marry me.  Please feel free to grovel at my feet in gratitude.  (Btw, we can totally start the wedding night now, we’ll tell your mother about it when she arrives tomorrow.)”

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I knew you once,
And it was nice.
I knew your brain;
And your heart,
All your insides.
Oh, I could tell,
Just with a look
What you were thinking
That’s all it took.
You shared your secrets,
And I shared mine
Silence was comfy,
Without having to try
We swapped our smiles,
Gifted advice
Yes, I knew you once
And it was nice
—  dodie, I Knew You Once
QN Evolution Concert Twitter Round Up/Report

DISCLAIMER: I DID NOT GO TO THE CONCERT OR THE LIVE VIEWING. I AM MERELY REPORTING/ROUNDING UP INFORMATION IN ONE POST FOR EASY ACCESS OF INFORMATION.

This is a really long post so I put it under the cut! I haven’t put everything I could onto this post but if there’s things you want to read up on you can read more about the live with #カルライレポ2017 on twitter!

Also no DVD/BD announcement yet

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|| an autocorrect love story ||

lmao I promised my friend that I would take a break from writing, but technically, this doesn’t count since I wrote this imagine MONTHS ago and posted it on my DeviantArt page. I just decided to copy it to my tumblr account because I was really proud of this imagine.

I added a few extra details so that it could fit with Tom!Peter Parker,,,,,, ;)))))

And lets be real, Peter would totally confess to his crush like this lol ♡

warnings: none

please don’t repost this story

——

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The Silent Treatment- Soonyoung (Hoshi) Fluff/Angst

Originally posted by kwontv

Request: Hey there! I see you want requests and I’m here for one ewe I hope you can make an angst but at the end very fluffy scenario with Hoshi where you two have a fight and start no talking to each other? I know im not being specific, don’t hate me ;n; You’re the best♡

Word Count:1135

Genre: Fluff/Angst

Member/Group: Soonyoung (Hoshi) of SEVENTEEN

Summary: Every couple fights, some just choose to handle it in a more childish way than others.

A/N: Hey ya’ll! I have a few drafts that I am beginning to work on, so expect some future works for BTS. Anyway, Hope you all enjoy this a bunch! xx


 It all started with a simple fight, really. When Soonyoung had left that morning, he had asked you to clean a shirt that he needed for a company dinner that night, and you being the forgetful person you were, had completely forgotten saying ‘yes’ in a sleepy haze. Obviously, you had not put the shirt in the washer before you had left to go to University, so you arrived home to a fuming and frantic Soonyoung hurriedly trying to use his blowdryer to get the shirt mildly dry before he had to rush out the door to meet with the CEO. No words had been exchanged between you, only somber gazes you sent his way as he sighed and shook his head. Before you even knew what was happening, you were yelling and dropping your bag on the ground as you stomped to your room and flopped onto the bed.

 “It’s not my fault, Soonyoung! You know I can’t remember things when I am given instructions at 6 o’clock in the morning! Maybe you should have texted me like a responsible adult would!” Your words, though filled with emotions, fell on deaf ears.

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Hamilton Characters As Things My Classmates Have Said

Hamilton: Oh my god… I’ve dated everyone in this room!

Burr: I hate everyone here. No miss don’t send me next door I hate everyone there too.

Laurens: (as somebody says ‘come out’ to a bottle of paint) I’M ALREADY OUT YOU IDIOT!

Lafayette: French is great. It’s the only subject I can just say baguette and get a good grade.

Mulligan: Why does this school not offer textiles let’s start a protest. HEADTEACHER WHY DON’T WE HAVE TEXTILES CLASSES?

Angelica: Sir this maths problem is sexist so I’m just, like, not going to do it.

Eliza: Miss I can’t get my homework out… I made it out of cupcakes and this is a science lab.

Peggy: I mean, I’m here, but I’m not really doing anything, I’m just here.

Maria: Sir I don’t need to know this I’m beautiful af. I could be a model. Models don’t need to know algebra.

Jefferson: I can’t do the bleep test. My hair is too fabulous. They don’t do the bleep test in other places.

Madison: Yes, I’m ill. No, I haven’t been to the doctor. I’m just always ill. Always.

Washington: I’m the dad friend because I’m the least stupid and immature of these monkeys.

KG3: Can’t I have a class just for me? You know, without all these *sniffs* peasants?

Philip: Sometimes I think I’ll be just like my dad and then I think no that’s a bad idea.

anonymous asked:

Hey, It seems like there's not much the lord actually does in the feudal economy? How easy would it be to just cut him out of the process? (I understand it was extremely hard in practice but I'm curious if there were any attempts to cut them out of the process and just manage the estate without them)

Well, primarily what the lord did was to take all the rent and taxes, the free labor, the extra income from mills and bridges and the like, and all the other feudal privileges to which they felt entitled, and not work for a living and instead focus on hunting and jousting and war and politics and really stupendous levels of conspicious consumption. 

In terms of how easy it would be to get rid of them, well, that was most of what the 14th century peasant revolts were all about. When you look at how the revolts start, one of the first targets of the peasantry were court records - chiefly manorial court records that were the only source of information about who was a serf and who wasn’t, who owed feudal obligations and who didn’t. Even before they got to the point of capturing capitol cities and demanding royal charters of liberty, the peasants would just burn the records that said they were serfs or villeins or owed any kind of free labor and then dare their landlords to prove that they weren’t free men. 

So ultimately, I’d say the main difficulty with getting rid of the nobility is that they were perfectly willing to 1. renege on any agreement or oath made to rebellious peasants, 2. ignore a flag of truce and murder the peasants’ leadership, 3. call out the army and kill thousands of people to restore compliance with the ancien regime. 

impossiblyeclecticduck  asked:

I'm quite sure you've permanently adopted RMF and @crystalsoulslayer. I call you the Meme Trio in my headspace.

i like to think it’s a mutual adoption where we are all each others’ meme children. but nice, i like this. thank you.

WINNERS!!~

1st Place
@evionit
@sherlock-sparkles

2nd Place
@ablasteranddecibat
@derpyaugirl
@laelaxh

3rd Place
@cezlovesart
@frozentanuki
@dis-shadow-blitz

4th Place
@ahrifoxtailgoddess
@yuuki-clyde
@ask-edge-and-blue
@slaxisrocks

5th Place
@ania-da-peasant
@pandabearbackpack
@violetrelliadoll
@sapphirescarletta123

PLEASE ALL THE WINNERS SEND ME A MESSAGE, IF YOU DONT ILL PICK ANOTHER WINNER!!

9

first and last lines of every Belle and Sebastian studio album from 1996 to 2015 (because we’d all rather drag ourselves across the dance floor)
~ comments, suggestions, or corrections more than welcome ~

I still read you
Do you still read me
I feel like you might
Words decay fantasy
As much as facilitate
They linger and live within us
I need to believe in other times
The velvet that exists
Outside your jaded cinema
The queue a mile long
You waiting all eve
Dressed in mawkish peasant grin
It comforts me to know palpable
To remember worthy provocation
The human you were
Before you became unreal
–Counterpoised
Frozen in this angst driven whorl
Too much cold for even me
No notion of light
Spring like theatrics
Painted moods of fevered orchids
Pallid stars that intercept

anonymous asked:

Re watching the wedding ep & just had an actual brain-explosion at 'I know it's not how or where you imagined.' Aaron had actual wedding ideas. Aaron. Someone hold me, the little scruff is so grown up my soul aches.

YOU KNOW WHEN THEY CAME BACK FROM MANCHESTER AND ROB WAS ALL “WE CAN TELL YOU PEASANTS ABOUT OUR WEDDING IDEAS” AND YOU JUST KNOW THEY SPENT TIME TALKING ABOUT IT WHILE THEY WERE ROLLING AROUND THEIR HOTEL BED what a beautiful thing

LMAOOO Matt Hardy fans are truly hilarious, they continue to go on about Lita cheating on Matt and how it “ruined her career” or “omg she had her share of kharma because she’s with nobody and matt is married yaaYYYY1!1!” 🤣😂while you cucks are all focused on Litas love life…She remains in the Hall Of Fame, was part of Tough Enough, introduced the new Women’s title and is helping women in WWE today, she appears in WWE every so now and then and not to mention she was voted as one of the missed divas of WWE. Matt? he got arrested for DUI, domestic violence against his wife Reby Sky, TNA, etc..yeahh good one for kharma right? i’m not saying that what Lita did was right it was obviously wrong and she ADMITTED that she was wrong in her interview with Lilian Garcia now do the rest a favor and fucking move on because i know Edge, Lita and Matt all did. stay mad you peasants, Lita will still rise

Originally posted by its-my-yard

You Know You’re An INTP When

When some peasant asks you how you’re doing and it all sounds wise in your head but when you say it out loud it’s something completely different. Then you start to wonder why you can discuss Albert Einstein’s achievements, talk about the functions of the brain, cheese making or any other complicated system for hours without a problem.

anonymous asked:

it's "supposed" not "susspoed". maybe learn how to spell before you make gifsets

first of all i have no idea of what gifset you are talking about, second of all sorry queen of spelling you know sometimes peasants do mistakes when they write, especially when it’s not their language

saya7  asked:

Hi dads! Can you pass this on to drawing sibling? I'm a 5' 2" girl with a heart shaped face. I have long red hair (think Ariel) with side swept bangs to the right and blue eyes (they actually change colors but they're blue most often). I'm part Irish and Scottish so super crazy pale. 😂 I also love peasant style clothes (tunics, leggings, boots). Love you all and hope you're all doing well!!! - Your writing and baking Slytherin daughter

I LIKE YOU YOU SOUND ADORABLE CHILD WHO IS DRAWING!!!!! LOOK AT THISSSSSS. and we are well and hope you are too!
-Sirius

Solving for ‘X’

I wrote a little highschool!AU destiel to celebrate my birthday! What could be better than young nerds in love ❤︎

Castiel was the best in the class at algebra, and everyone knew it.

There were people who were close, sure, but Dean definitely wasn’t one of those. Chewing on the end of his pencil, he watched as Cas - wearing a neat blazer, and wearing it well - scribbled letters and numbers on the whiteboard, while Ms Mosely looked on approvingly.

“Then you can multiply by 3,” Cas said, “to solve ‘x’. It’s twenty one.”

“Excellent work, Mr Novak,” said Ms Mosely. “You’ve come on leaps and bounds this semester. Please return to your seat.”

Dean rolled his eyes. And Cas saw it, too, as he resumed his seat - the one right in front of Dean’s. It was obvious from the way that Cas’ lips turned down, and his cheeks flushed. Even the tips of his ears went a little pink; Dean had the perfect view of them, from right behind him.

He willed himself not to feel bad. Castiel’s ego had to be sky-high, seeing as he was ruling the school as far as grades went. He could probably use being taken down a peg or two.

Even still, it stuck in Dean’s mind all the way through the lesson, even when Ms Mosely set them some algebra problems to do individually and Dean could see Castiel’s pencil flying across the page, solving the equations in record time, while Dean himself scratched aimlessly at his notebook - stuck on the first one. When the bell was about to ring, he leaned forward and flicked Cas on the back, hard.

“What’s the answer to number one?” he whispered, under the cover of Ms Mosely reaching down into her desk and clattering open her drawer. Castiel only looked at Dean for a very, very long moment - and let his gaze linger in a way that made Dean very, very aware of the fray in the shoulder of his leather jacket, and the cheapness of his t-shirt, and the fact that he hadn’t had time to style his hair right that morning.

“What?” Dean demanded. Castiel said nothing at all - and then, very pointedly, he rolled his eyes at Dean, and turned away.

Dean fumed until the bell rang five minutes later, and then stormed out of the class.

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