peace woo

Say His Name: Part VII (Zico/Reader/Namjoon)

Part I | Part II | Part III | Part IV | Part V | Part VI 

Rating: M *trigger warnings for revisited violence and sensitive topics*

Namjoon’s POV 


 
Waking up to her was the last memory. We hadn’t spoken since then, and now there’s snow covering the ground. She had “things” to figure out. Which, granted, is understandable, but we’d both said it that night, it wasn’t just me- this time. I promised her I wouldn’t make her choose. I lied.

Waiting for her was becoming unbearable, especially since I heard that they had broken up and she was getting a new place in the city. Or maybe that’s just what they told the press. I just wanted to hear her voice again. Hear her- and know she was doing fine. Hear her story- break her walls- all that dramatic shit- I’d scale the tower.

It took me less than fifteen minutes to get to her new place. Fifteen minutes of wondering why he had been with her, and what “She needs you” meant- the door was left unlocked, I tripped over a box in the hallway falling flat on my face, shouting some choice words. She didn’t come looking for the cause of the noise. I didn’t hear her sweetly call my name from another room.

“Where are you.” I called from the floor. No answer. I stumbled up, anger raging in my heels, pushing open every door in search for where he had left her. She didn’t need me. She needed a hospital.

I found her, naked, in the bedroom, on a mattress lying on the floor, curled up into herself shaking and muttering something I couldn’t quite make out. The violet rash on her neck painted a picture of what had occurred before my arrival. I’ll kill him. If it’s the last thing I do- I will kill him.

“Hey- Hey- No. No, no- hey it’s me- it’s Joonlook at me- come on- open your eyes-” She continued to mutter under her breath. Something short and wispy. “I need you to look at me baby- we gotta get you to the hospita-”

“NO-” she shrieked maintaining her position and somehow forcing herself deeper into the mattress. I tried to cover her with one of the sheets, but she only shied away from me more, like she had become a stray animal afraid of strangers- I positioned myself next to her, hovering just close enough that she’d feel my presence, close enough so I could hear what she’d been muttering this whole time-

Jiho-” left her lips over and over again, like she was saying a rosary after confession. I motioned to peel her hands from hugging herself, creating even more bruises, she shrieked even louder than before, thrashing and wailing, we both needed to suffer for just a little longer-

Finally getting a handle on her, I pulled her close to me, placing her hands on my chest and placing mine on the back of her head and neck, intertwining out legs. She still whimpered, but she muffled them into my chest where I felt hot tears soaking through my shirt. She needed to get looked at, this was more serious than the bruises. She’d gone completely insane in a matter of minutes- or had this been a long time coming?

I’m not going to leave you. Do you hear me-” If there was only one thing she could be sure of, one thing that was still possible, it would be me. I’m not her knight in shining armor. I didn’t save her from what happened, I didn’t ride in on my white horse in the nick of time to kick some ass and win her heart. There’s no such reality.

I’m the calm after the storm.  

As I held her in my arms I felt tears forming in the corners of my eyes. This is all I had wanted. To be there for her. I’d give everything for this to not be the way she rediscovered me, but there’s very little we can do about that now.

She’d become so brittle in such a short amount of time. I kissed the top of her head as if I was returning to a familiar place, making sure I had the right girl. She smelt the same. Lavender, with subtle hints of his cologne, reminding me again just how much she’d never be mine. He was soaked into her skin like a tattoo.

I’m cold-” I was startled at her attempt to form an actual sentence. I covered the both of us with a blanket and nuzzled in closer to her.

“Here baby- try not to talk, you’re so swollen.” And maimed, and traumatized, don’t even get me started on what they had been doing prior to the incident. Was it all just a game to him? He’ll never go near her again. He’ll never touch her again. As long as I have enough rage inside of me to protect her he’ll never take another breath around her. The next time she would see him will be in a coffin.

We stayed there for a while longer till she finally fell asleep. I took advantage of the time to gather her clothes and call an ambulance. After vaguely explaining the situation and giving the address I thought it best to wake her so she wouldn’t be startled.

Baby- the ambulance will be here soon- we’re going to get you checked out- you won’t be in pain anymore-” We both knew that was a lie.

“Why are you doing this-”

“You know the answer to that.”

“I want you to say it.”

My blood began to boil. She was testing me. Even in this state, even though I was the only one left, she was still testing me. I was going to pass this time.

“I love you. Whether you understand that or not- I love you. And it’s not what you were lead to believe love was- this love is real. This love will protect more than your heart, it will protect your mind when you have doubts, it will protect your voice when you feel like you’ll never be heard, and it will protect your body when you’re in danger, like now. This love will call a goddamn ambulance when you’ve been strangled half to death! I don’t care if you hate me for it, it you never speak to me again after this, but I love you, even if you’re this oblivious, whether it’s a choice or not. I’m not here to lecture you, or try to pick up all the pieces because we both know that’s impossible. I am not here to save you. You can do that on your own, but- know that there is nothing I will not do for you- especially when you don’t think you need it. Now get dressed.”

My voice was rising just slightly as I came off the last sentence. I couldn’t believe how easy that was for me to say, it’s like I had it memorized. I shouldn’t be so shocked though, everything had come this easy with her.

She looked at me awestruck, her face changed completely. It looked like she’d just seen snow for the first time, confused, curious, and hesitant to understand it.  I thought she’d be mad, but she just looked puzzled, she really had no idea. 

I saw the ambulance lights out of the window and tenderly placed a kiss on her forehead, reminding her that change started now and she didn’t have to be alone.


*I think we all need to be reminded about what a healthy relationship looks like. I know this is a story, full of things that are outrageous and completely fictional, but there is some truth behind it. I can’t wait to continue writing our readers journey to find self-love with a little help from the people she’s met along the way… Maybe even some other bts members…  I really need to give her a name… Suggestions?  Keep it anonymous? How are the playlists??? Let me know your thoughts :)

Weekends with Woo

9. Peaceful

[ 1. Club-night encounters ] [ 2. The morning after ] [ 3. Reason enough ]
[ 4. Yet ] [ 5. Yet pt 2 ] [ 6. Why? ] [ 7. Spending the night  ] [ 8.  Missing you ]

Yes, I have started using gifs (I’m not sure how long this is going to last, I just really got into this specific episode, because not only was this planned from day one, but my already messy feels were further messed up by a certain snuggling post. Anyway, please enjoy this week’s episode of WWW!


Wednesdays were your favorite days. It was odd, as they were in the middle of the week, but you loved them. Maybe it was the way they never really fit in, or the way they signaled that the work week was halfway over. You didn’t really know why; you just really liked Wednesdays.

Keep reading

Say His Name - Part X -Part II (Zico/Reader/Namjoon)

Part I | Part II | Part III | Part IV | Part V | Part VI | Part VII | Part VII + | | Part VIII | Part IX | Part X - I

Asianfanfic link


Readers POV

I was completely caught off guard when I saw him at the door- 

“You’re covered in blood-” I tried to keep a relatively mild tone with him- he already looked furious. But then I had remembered where Joon was going-

Guess who’s-” he cocked his head to the side and gave me one of his sinister grins- something that I had tried to permanently erase from my memory- but if he touched Joon- if her hurt him

YOU BASTA-” arms flailing as he covered my mouth with his hand and tried to restrain me with the rest of his body- then the bone chill set in- he brought his venomous lips to my ear and unleashed a lethal dose- 

”Your boyfriend tells me that you need to get me out of your system- I’m only here to help baby-“ 

I had to get away- I had to get to Joon- there’s no way Zico would be here unless he had won- that would mean Joon’s somewhere between unconsciousness and death- and the blood- his blood- Zico was covered in it- I needed to help him- I wanted to rip his shirt off, take it to Joon and force the lost blood back into his body- 

I had never fraught so hard in my life- it’s probably because I had something worth fighting for- before he stormed out I wanted to tell him that I needed to completely end things with Zico- it was the only way we could be together- and now he’s knocked out somewhere bleeding out- or worse.  

I lacked physical strength and my emotions were running haywire- being in his grasp again made me feel so small- so helpless- who knows what he had planned for me- I grew tried trying to use the little strength is had to kick and claw at him- but knowing Zico- this only made the game more interesting. 

I started to have a panic attack- much like the last time Zico had showed up unannounced. I tried to focus my anger and anxiety on the real issue at hand- I started to mutter to myself with hopes to hike up enough courage to say it out loud.

You don’t own me. You don’t own me. You don’t own me. 

“YOU DONT OWN ME ANYMORE ZICO!” The words flew out of my mouth like daggers aimed at his heart. I couldn’t believe I said it, getting away from his grasp enough to speak exhausted me enough. He looked at me dumbfounded going over the other million things he’d thought I would say instead of this. He let me go completely and stumbled backwards as if he was being confronted by a ghost- 

“I-I-” he fell to his knees, head hanging down as he started to breath heavily- I didn’t let my guard down- this couldn’t be remorse- 

“Where is he Zico-" 

"Don’t call me that- please- anything but that-" 

"It’s who you are-" 

"ITS JUST A MASK!" 

Then take it off- and maybe I’ll say your real name.“ His head rose hesitantly- his tear stained eyes caught me off guard. What were these strange feelings- 

"I-I’m trying-” Zico was never one to beg- the only other time I heard his voice come close to this was two weeks ago while Namjoon was kicking him out of the apartment- what was he playing at-

“I’m done playing games." 

"THIS ISNT A GAME! I-I’m really losing it- I’m falling apart- I- need- you-

I suddenly went slack jawed- if he was playing- he’d defiantly taken it to a new level- but i had never seen that look in his eyes- scared and unsure- it was like looking into a mirror from the night he almost killed me- 

I was shaken from my momentary remorse after remembering what he had done to me. All the trauma- the clinics- the sleepless nights- he wasn’t there for any of it- Joon was- I needed to get to Joon- where was he- 

"Where is he." 

"You wouldn’t even know wonder boy if I haven’t introduced you two- I set it up- I’m the reason you became so close- WHY HIM!" 

There wasn’t time to make a rundown of all the reasons why I’d chosen Joon over him- and there isn’t enough time in my life to explain that it’s not just because he’s good for me- it’s much more than that- it all had to wait- 

"Give me your keys- what’s your address-you owe me that much- he’s dying Jiho-" 

He looked up at me with a wanton look in his eyes, begging for me to stay with him- to say his name- to choose him again- but he was out of chances- and I needed to be the knight in shining armor for once-    

“Just once more- please” his voice was horse, like a wounded animal begging for the sweet release of death. I cupped his face in my hands and placed a genital kiss on his forehead-

Jiho-

I took his keys after he whispered the address- but I couldn’t help but wonder what had come over him- 

Maybe one day- when we pass each other on the street ten years from now I’d be hand an hand with Joon saying our hellos to an old friend-  it would take a lot of work- but if I can get better- so could he.


I had reached Zico’s apartment and struggled to unlock the door due to my shaking hands- I had no idea what I would face on the other side of this door- 

Laying in what looked like an ocean of blood- I saw his body stir slightly as he struggled to open his eyes- 

“It’s you-”

I couldn’t help but cry while hearing his words scratch against his lips- 

Shhh- baby don’t try to talk- you- you’re all swollen-” even more tears drenched my face as I took note in how the tables have turned- 

“I called an ambulance- they’ll be here soon- just hold on for me baby-”  

“You picked me- I can’t belie- I’m never letting you out of my sight again- my beautiful girl- my brave girl” My face leaned close to his so he wouldn’t have to speak above a whisper. My hand gently wiped the tears from his eyes while I tried to hold back my unearthly sobbing. 

“Says the one covered in cuts and bruises- stop stealing my lines-” 

I stayed with him the whole time- in the ambulance- the waiting room- filled out some paperwork for him- everything he’d ever done for me- I’d pay him back- 


Breaking news: A young man- mid twenties was seen jumping out off a fifteen story building earlier today- no news yet on his current status-  


*This went a little differently then I had planned- hope that’s okay!!!