paying tolls

Dragon: “HALT TRAVELER! THIS BRIDGE IS UNDER MY CONTROL! PAY THE TOLL OR CROSS THIS RIVER ELSEWHERE!”

Knight: “Nay foul beast! These are the lands of men! I shall pay no such toll, and what’s more I shall slay you rid this land of your tyranny!”

Dragon: “TYRANNY!? FOOLISH MAN! THIS BRIDGE IS OVER A HUNDRED YEARS OLD AND IN DIRE NEED OF REPAIRS! THE STONES ARE ERODING AND THERE ARE TERMITES IN THE WOOD!”

Knight: “… what?”

Dragon: “I GIVE THIS BRIDGE ANOTHER FIVE YEARS BEFORE IT COLLAPSES! I’D RATHER AVOID THAT AND PREVENT SOME POOR HUMAN FROM GETTING HURT!

Knight: ”…“

Dragon: "THE TOLL IS TEN GOLD PIECES.”

Knight: “… Okay.”

Dragon: “ALSO, DOWN THE ROAD, A FRIEND OF MINE IS RAISING FUNDS TO FIX A FARMER’S ROOF! IF YOU COULD ASSIST THEM AS WELL WE’D BE VERY GRATEFUL!”

Advice from an 80 year old man

1. Have a firm handshake.
2. Look people in the eye.
3. Sing in the shower.
4. Own a great stereo system.
5. If in a fight, hit first and hit hard.
6. Keep secrets.
7. Never give up on anybody. Miracles happen everyday.
8. Always accept an outstretched hand.
9. Be brave. Even if you’re not, pretend to be. No one can tell the difference.
10. Whistle.
11. Avoid sarcastic remarks.
12. Choose your life’s mate carefully. From this one decision will come 90 per cent of all your happiness or misery.
13. Make it a habit to do nice things for people who will never find out.
14. Lend only those books you never care to see again.
15. Never deprive someone of hope; it might be all that they have.
16. When playing games with children, let them win.
17. Give people a second chance, but not a third.
18. Be romantic.
19. Become the most positive and enthusiastic person you know.
20. Loosen up. Relax. Except for rare life-and-death matters, nothing is as important as it first seems.
21. Don’t allow the phone to interrupt important moments. It’s there for our convenience, not the caller’s.
22. Be a good loser.
23. Be a good winner.
24. Think twice before burdening a friend with a secret.
25. When someone hugs you, let them be the first to let go.
26. Be modest. A lot was accomplished before you were born.
27. Keep it simple.
28. Beware of the person who has nothing to lose.
29. Don’t burn bridges. You’ll be surprised how many times you have to cross the same river.
30. Live your life so that your epitaph could read, No Regrets
31. Be bold and courageous. When you look back on life, you’ll regret the things you didn’t do more than the ones you did.
32. Never waste an opportunity to tell someone you love them.
33. Remember no one makes it alone. Have a grateful heart and be quick to acknowledge those who helped you.
34. Take charge of your attitude. Don’t let someone else choose it for you.
35. Visit friends and relatives when they are in hospital; you need only stay a few minutes.
36. Begin each day with some of your favourite music.
37. Once in a while, take the scenic route.
38. Send a lot of Valentine cards. Sign them, ‘Someone who thinks you’re terrific.’
39. Answer the phone with enthusiasm and energy in your voice.
40. Keep a note pad and pencil on your bed-side table. Million-dollar ideas sometimes strike at 3 a.m.
41. Show respect for everyone who works for a living, regardless of how trivial their job.
42. Send your loved ones flowers. Think of a reason later.
43. Make someone’s day by paying the toll for the person in the car behind you.
44. Become someone’s hero.
45. Marry only for love.
46. Count your blessings.
47. Compliment the meal when you’re a guest in someone’s home.
48. Wave at the children on a school bus.
49. Remember that 80 per cent of the success in any job is based on your ability to deal with people.
50. Don’t expect life to be fair

In 2017, text your mother back. Tell your little sister that you love her. Say “hello” to the person behind you at the store. Tell someone that they look beautiful at least once a day. Pay the toll price for the person behind you. Buy someone a cup of coffee if they have a rough day. This year, be the kindness that you want to see.
—  c.a.m
no one on the smh can drive

listen. LISTEN. so many smh’ers are from major cities with ample public transportation. (this got long i’m so sorry)

nursey is from manhattan and went to boarding school so there’s about a 0% chance he can drive.

shitty and lardo the bostonians are pros at the T but shitty, again being a boarding school kid, probably never learned to drive and lardo - she might’ve if she had really wanted to, but given that driving in boston is literal hell on earth she probably forewent it altogether.

jack is from montréal where the driving laws are wonky and the gas is expensive. i would say that he learned while in rimouski, but being the anxious kid he was (esp. since those were his worst years anxiety-wise) i’ve gotta say he probably let parser or his billet family drive him everywhere he needed to be. he definitely does learn when he goes into the NHL though, because you pretty much need a car in providence and also no way could he, a star pro athlete, commute by public transit that would be a disaster (and because he’s not gonna make bitty come to him every time? this relationship is an equal one, people!)

ransom is from toronto. i don’t know toronto super well but i do know they have pretty solid public transit as well, and that the 401 is famously the busiest highway in north america, so i’m gonna guess ransypoo decided not to do the whole driving thing? unless he’s from the suburbs and not actually toronto proper.

tango, my sweet clueless north jersey boy, would not sit behind the wheel within 20 miles of the new jersey turnpike if you paid him a million dollars (partly because the turnpike would charge him that much). plus parking anywhere up there is absurd. he’ll stick to taking the public trains/spending all his time across the river in NY. (if u hc him as being from south jersey then yeah he can drive but he’s a TERRIBLE driver and i love him too much for that so i’m sticking with jersey city or hoboken tangs all the way)

if chowder drove in the SF/SJ area not only would he be a significantly more pessimistic person from sitting in traffic all the time, he’d also go broke from paying the tolls on the oakland bay bridge. plus, you see so many cool different people taking the train whereas driving up the freeway all you see is license plates. chowder looooves taking the train. BART is his best buddy.

which leaves holster, bitty, dex, and whiskey. these poor guys have to drive everyone else everywhere.

holster never drove anywhere very urban since he grew up in buffalo (a relatively small, suburban city) and spent time in iowa, which is all flat open roads. holster is therefore a Speed Demon and very… overconfident in his driving abilities. the unspoken rule around the haus is that holster is not permitted behind the wheel past the 95/93 split. 

bitty being from rural georgia can absolutely drive (hell, we’ve canonically seen his truck), and because he likely went to atlanta frequently he’s at least somewhat hardened against city Hell Traffic. “oh hon. if i can handle 75-85 durin’ rush hour i sure can get myself on up to boston. don’t you worry your sweet lil’ heart.” a top choice for team driver, though he doesn’t bring his car with him to massachusetts.

since dex is from suburban maine he can drive, and he’s likely been to boston a few times in his late teen life before samwell. he’s a solid 8/10, and he takes his car (a silver SUV) with him to samwell so he’s also roped into giving rides a lot.

whiskey whiskey whiskey, ain’t he a myst’ry. where are you from, connor, you enigma of a boy. i don’t know if he can drive, but if he can, he probably chooses not to bring a car to samwell for economic reasons - parking passes are pricey and the commuter rail stop to boston is in walking distance! he probably also doesn’t disclose that he can drive. he’s smart enough not to make that mistake.

tl;dr please pray for dex and bitty, de facto smh designated drivers

i also have a headcanon about lardo getting her CDL so she can drive the team bus but that’s another story for another time

That Connection [1/?]

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Tech!Reader

Warning: None, swearing prolly at some point? Haha

A/N: This is a spin off of Criminal Minds Penelope x Morgan relationship, only they end up together at the end. haha. There will only be like 5 or 6 parts to this at the most. Hope you enjoy, let me know if you want to be tagged.

You being the tech analysis for the Avengers, you’re at their call 24/7 specially when they take off on missions. You have a great relationship with the whole team, but the playful, witty banter you have with Steve is next level, your his favorite girl and he’s your blue eyed god. Little does he realize you’re harboring a deep, brooding love for him, now if only he returned the same feelings.

@mrskokitztelford   @geek13freak
@feelmyroarrrr   @liloscreativeadventures
@addictivewriter  @supermoonpanda
@sebbaevans   @travelwithwords
@barbrichards   @peppermint–teas
@cookaloo  @chrisevansthedoritobastard  
@holahellohialoha  @almightyunnie
@imamotherfuckingstar-lord  @iwillbeinmynest  
@letsgetfuckingsuperwholocked  @goodnightwife
@irepeldirt  @yourtropegirl
@bellejeunefillesansmerci  @buckyb-avengers
@winterboobaer  @mrhowardstark
@rileyloves5  @ria132love
@mystery94  @marvelfandom-stuff
@tequilavet

You could hear the phone ringing in your office, you picked up pace, speed walking in heels wasn’t something you were well rounded in. Quickly you make it to your chair rolling across the floor, you reach your phone.

“Speak to me.” You grin into the phone.

“What took you so long?” Your favorite voice comes through the line.

“Awe love, worried someone else is getting my love?” You smirk as you begin typing into the computer gathering the information the team was calling for.

Keep reading

[puts my lips against the microphone] hi i’m so glad you all came. here’s my 5000 word analysis on why the troll toll song featured in season 4 episode 13 “the nightman cometh” of fx’s hit show it’s always sunny in philadelphia is actually about mac paying the troll toll to get into the boy’s hole, which isn’t dennis’ asshole as one may suspect, but rather his god hole, which he’s previously tried to fill with money, the illusion of power, and puss, but now realizes that he’s needed mac to fill all along. furthermore,

Capable of Change - 5 (Savitar!Barry/Reader)

Imagine, remnant Barry getting asked out by you and he decided to say yes…

Part One Part Two Part Three Part Four

Originally posted by rawrfreak

“That is not true!” He smiled as you stood up holding a dvd in your hand.

“I can’t help that Monty Python is over quoted and over done.” He told you.

“But this is the Holy Grail. Everyone likes the Holy Grail.”  You shook the dvd case in front of him.

“I’m not everyone.” He smirked.

“Fine, what movie is the best to you?” You crossed your arms. He opened his mouth to speak but the sound of someone at the door stopped him. You moved to go answer it but his legs stayed stretched out resting on the table in the way, “Dude…”

“Pay the toll.” He smirked as you nudged his legs again.

“There’s someone at my door. Move.” You smiled at him.

“Pay…the toll.” He said slowly his face not changing as you rolled your eyes, “They’re going to be waiting a really long time…”

“Oh my god, you’re ridiculous.” You leaned down giving him a kiss. He let you pass walking for the door.

He leaned his head back watching you. After a few days of getting somethings in order for his plan to work, he’d taken you to dinner. He had concluded that he was a god, he should be able to get what he wanted.

He felt happier than he had in many years. In the cage, he had been so consumed…He shook it off when he heard you speak, “Dad? Hi! What are you doing here? Did I miss a call?”

He watched you hug an older gentleman as he stood up listening, “Oh I was in the area and thought I’d stop by to catch up, but I see I’m interrupting.”

“Right…no you’re fine. I actually…I want you to meet him.” You smiled looking over to Allen, “Dad, this is…uh…well this Bartholomew Allen, and this is my dad, John.”

“Bartholomew, don’t hear of many of those.” John reached out his hand to him.

“And that’s why everyone calls me Allen.” Allen took his hand, “It’s nice to meet you.”

“Yeah…You must be the mystery guy she’s mentioned, but never reveals.” John smirked and it was then that he could see the resemblance.

“Dad…” You blushed a little shutting the door.

“What? I gotta embarrass you when I can. You’re always so busy now.” He walked over to one of the bar stools in the kitchen taking a seat.

“I find it hard to believe that Y/N gets embarrassed.” Allen crossed his arms smirking at you.

“Please don’t get him started….” You whispered scratching your forehead.

“You know I might be old.” Your father looked at you both, “But I still can hear.”

The next few hours were spent in good conversation and laughter. He’d gotten you to laugh before but the way your father made your eyes crinkle, it was something special. The more time he spent with you them more he realized how much he’d forgotten how to live.

“I love you peanut.” John whispered kissing your head as you lingered holding onto him.

“I love you too dad.” You smiled letting go finally.

“It was really good to meet you sir.” Allen held out his hand.

John took his hand firmly, “You seem alright Allen…take good care of my girl.”

“I’ll do my best.” Allen smiled stepping closer to you noticing your cheeks flush.

“You two have a good night.” John turned to the door opening, “Oh and Allen…”

“Yes sir?” He stood up straight as John looked back at him.

“It’s the Holy Grail…” John smiled a little, “Sometimes watching it with the right person gives you a better perspective. Have a good night.”

Allen looked at you smirking at him, “So I take it…”

“We are totally watching that movie.” You laughed wrapping your arms around his neck, “Thanks for not running away.”

“He’s your dad, it was bound to happen. Though I do wish I would have had a little prep time.” He said placing his hands on your hips as you leaned up kissing him.

“Well you did great.” You moved your hands to his chest give him a pat, “You get comfy, I’m gonna make some popcorn.”

He pulled you back to him as you stepped away. When you looked to his face you saw him biting his lower lip in a mischievous way, “So I know of a few places that I can get comfy here, you’re going to have to get more specific.”

“Oh well…I mean…we could go about anywhere you want.” He smirked drawing closer to him, “Did you have a favorite place in mind?”

You yelped as he scooped you up into his arms heading for the stairs, “I do.”

You smiled a while later you moved resting your chin on his chest staring up at his face. He smiled at you before reaching over brushing hair from your face, “You are so beautiful.”

“Thanks.” You blushed a little leaning into his hands, “You know, I could get real used to this.”

“To what?” He asked letting his thumb rub against your cheek absently.

“Waking up next to you.” You watched him smile more. You moved to your knees looking at him for a moment before swinging your legs off the bed.

“Where you going?” He moved with you letting his hand trail up your bare back as you searched for something to put on from the floor.

“I am going to make us something to eat. We never had dinner.” You looked back him.

“It’s midnight…stay in bed.” He stared at him.

“3.”

“What?”

“2.”

“Y/N?”

“1.”

His stomach let out a loud low rumble, “Uh…”

“I’ll be back.” You pulled on your robe before leaning down giving him a kiss, “Just relax.”

Relax. He sighed watching you disappear from view letting his head rest against the pillows. Yeah…he could get used of this too.

You came back with some hefty looking sandwiches. He took his as you set yours on the bed walking over to the small tv, “No…really?”

You looked back at the whining man, “This movie is happening…even if we fall asleep watching it.”

He sighed before taking a bite thinking back to what your father had said to him, which got him thinking about her father in general, “Hey can I ask you something?”

“Of course you can.” You sat down picking up your sandwich.

“Your dad…” He looked at you as the movie started in the background, “He’s…sick?”

You took in a breath nodding slowly, “Yeah…cancer.”

“I’m sorry…” You looked at him as he put his sandwich on the bedside table, “It’s bad isn’t it?”

“He’s doing okay, but…doctors aren’t hopeful.” You told him frowning, “You could tell?”

“I’ve been around sick people…” He told you, “He seems like a healthy guy…is it genetic?”

“Uh actually no.” You picked at your sandwich, “You’re right he’s really healthy…was…but three years ago he was at work and that …thing blew up. You know the science thing STAR Labs.”

He listened as you went on, “He was affected like those special people, but…instead of getting fast or…cool powers. His genes mutate too fast I guess. The doctors have tried radiation, surgeries…it always comes back.”

He shut his eyes frowning, “Y/N…I don’t…”

“It’s okay.” You looked at him, “My brother and I we’ve come to terms and so has my dad. Doesn’t make it much easier but…well…you can’t change it.”

“Y/N…you know if you need anything…ever.” He trailed off.

You smiled scooting closer to him looking at the tv, “I know…”

He put his arm around you. The pair of you fell silent watching the film. He smiled every time you started to mutter some line.

Your dad was right…sometimes perspective can change with the people you’re around.

Hot Mess

*Laundry Mat AU inspired by this fabulous headcanon by @ronanlynchamiright. Thank you so much!!! The world needs Ronan in brightly colored briefs.

Adam is a hot mess by the time he’s biked to the laundry mat. His shirt doesn’t have a single inch of dry fabric, all of it soaked through by sweat. He locks his bike out front and plucks at his shirt self-consciously. His laundry—all of his clothes except the ones he’s currently wearing—is shoved in a large canvas bag he bought at the thrift store. His cleaner clothes are at the top of the bag and his grimy shop clothes are shoved to the bottom. Adam’s got laundry day down to a science, knowing exactly how much he can stuff into a single load, how much detergent will be required, how many quarters it will take to wash and dry two loads.

The laundry mat is almost empty, something else that Adam has planned out; Wednesday nights are the best time to do laundry because half the town is at church and the other half is too busy not being in church to swing by the laundry mat. As Adam shoves the door open he notices the only other person inside is a guy who looks to be about his age but that’s all they have in common.

The guy is sitting on top of one of the washers, his head tipped back against the wall, expensive headphones sealed over his ears. He’s totally still, except for his feet, which are braced on the wall of dryers across from him. His heavy black boots tap along to whatever he’s listening to. He’s about the most visually interesting guy Adam’s ever seen in Henrietta and he looks like danger personified: shaved scalp, tattoo ink visible from where his cutaway black wife beater hangs open at the sides. He’s kind of scrawny but not weak looking.

Adam eyes him warily before setting down his bag and pulling the bottom of his shirt up to wipe the sweat off his face; it barely makes a difference. When he looks up the guy is staring at him, well, staring at his stomach. Adam feels the back of his neck heat. He knows that his toned body looks nice but it’s still a surprise to catch people looking, especially when the person in question looks like every bad decision he would make if he ever went to any of the parties his roommates keep inviting him to.

In clear violation of social norms the other guy doesn’t look away and Adam feels his blush creeping to his ears. He picks up his bag and walks forward, pretending not to notice, trying to focus on finding an available washer. The first three are taken, two of them are still running while the third has stopped but the clothes have been left inside. The guy sits on the fourth washer, staring at Adam. It feels like intimidation and Adam bristles. He can see that the fifth washer is available and he waits for the guy to put his legs down so he can get by. Adam makes eye contact and the guy just smirks at him.

“Hey man,” Adam says, his voice cold but civil, “can you move your legs?”

The guy pulls his headphones down around his neck. Adam can hear loud electronica, like what his roommate Chris constantly listens to.

“You gotta pay the toll first,” the guy says. His voice is low, a seductive snarl that makes Adam’s chest feel warm.

“What?” Adam can’t believe this guy. A toll?

The guy cocks his head and gives Adam another appraising look, like he’s trying to decide what he should charge, what Adam can afford. It’s obvious that this guy has money: Beats headphones, Doc Martens, fancy jeans that look beyond distressed, the back piece alone would have cost more than Adam makes in a month working his summer job.

“Your name.” It isn’t a question.

Adam stares back, the heat spreading to his throat. Anger wars with attraction but it’s his pride that wins.

“Fuck you,” Adam shoots back. He puts every ounce of meanness into his voice.

“That’s a hell of a name,” the guy replies, grinning. It makes him look even more handsome. “Your parents must really hate you.”

“Oh, they do,” Adam answers. “You gonna move?”

“Nope.”

It’s that damn smile that pushes Adam over the edge. He hates bastards who think they can do what they want because they’re good looking, because they have money. Adam doesn’t think twice before he knocks the guy’s boots down. They thud against the washer, hollow and loud in the empty laundry mat.

The guy laughs and kicks his heels against the washer in rhythm to the beat of his music. He smiles as Adam squeezes by and starts loading his clothes in the washer.

They don’t speak but Adam can feel the other guy’s eyes on him and it makes him feel flustered. His hands shake a little as he feeds quarters in the machine and he drops one. It rolls behind the washer and Adam knows, even as he gets down on his knees to look, that he’s never getting it back. In the narrow space between the machines he sees nothing but dust bunnies. He wants to smack the washer in frustration; it shouldn’t matter but he had brought exactly the correct amount for two loads, washed and dried. He’ll have to forego drying the second load.

Before he can climb to his feet Adam feels something cold touch the side of his neck, by his ear. That smoky, raspy voice says, “I think you dropped this.”

Adam looks up and finds the other guy leaning towards him, holding a quarter between his thumb and index finger like he just pulled it from Adam’s ear. He’s still grinning like he’s been told a dirty joke, but something about his vibe has softened, enough that Adam doesn’t immediately smack his hand away.

Adam palms the quarter, noticing the silvery scars on the guy’s forearms, an out of character detail that nags at him.

“Thanks,” Adam says, adding the quarter to the total in the washer. He selects the wash cycle, load size, and temperature and presses the start button. The washer surges to life and Adam settles against it feeling more tired than he should.

The guy kicks the toe of his boot against Adam’s thigh, demanding his attention. Adam sighs and turns to him, already regretting accepting the quarter.

“So,” the guy asks, “you come here often?”

Adam snorts a laugh. “Really dude? You’re trying to pick me up at the laundry mat?”

The guy continues to stare. It’s unnerving.

“Why not?” he asks. “My name is Ronan, by the way.”

“I don’t remember asking.” Adam’s pleased by the harsh frown the guy—Ronan—gives him. “I’m going to go do my homework. Have a nice life.”

Ronan gives a surprised or affronted huff but doesn’t bother Adam as he settles into one of the cracked plastic chairs near the entrance. Adam pulls his textbook out of his battered backpack and starts reading over the week’s assignment. Taking online summer courses seemed like a good use of his time when he signed up for them at the beginning of May but now he’s regretting it.

Adam shifts in his seat, trying to get comfortable. His sweaty shirt is cold against his skin and the seat is murder on his spine. He leans forward, the large textbook open on his knees. From time to time he steals glances at Ronan. The other guy has gone back to listening to his music. He looks better when he’s not being an asshole. Adam finds himself staring too long, thinking too much about Ronan coming onto him. Ronan looks over and catches Adam in the act and Adam flushes before ducking his head and going back to his book. When he looks again Ronan’s eyes are closed but he’s smirking.

After about thirty minutes Adam’s first load is done and he gets up and puts it in the dryer and starts his second load. Ronan intentionally ignores him and Adam tries to not let it bother him. After all, he shut the guy down, what was he expecting? While he’s pulling the last of his dirty clothes from the bag Ronan’s dryer buzzes, the cycle finished.

Ronan hops down and grabs a mesh bag that unfolds neatly. Ronan hip checks Adam as he moves to open the dryer. Adam grits his teeth but before he can come up with a scathing comment he sees what Ronan’s pulling out of the dryer: handful after handful of vibrant, neon-colored briefs. Adam’s mouth goes dry. The brand name, printed on the wide, elastic waistband reads Kalvin Clein but that’s not right. Adam’s never owned Calvin Klein anything but he knows how it’s spelled. The briefs don’t look like cheap knock-offs, though. In fact they look obscenely luxurious.

Ronan leans further into the dryer, digging around for the last of his briefs. Adam doesn’t mean to ogle him but he does, and he sees that custom brand peeking above the top of Ronan’s low-slung jeans, catches a flash of brilliant fuchsia fabric before Ronan pulls out of the dryer, a pair of lime green briefs twirling from his index finger.

Ronan winks at Adam and tosses the last pair on the veritable mountain of undergarments.

“See you later, Fuck You,” Ronan calls over his shoulder as he walks out of the laundry mat. Adam watches as Ronan climbs into a sexy BMW and smoothly whips out of the parking lot.

Later that night, when Adam strips out of his clothes to take a much-needed shower, a scrap of paper falls out of the pocket of his jeans. Adam stoops down and picks it up. Scrawled on the back of an ad for a psychic hotline is a number and a name: Ronan Lynch. Despite himself, Adam grins and tucks the number in his textbook.

Next

[This was originally intended to be a one shot but folks wanted more and I’m always happy to write more Pynch! Also on my AO3: justdk]

anonymous asked:

dark/horror fairy au's??? oh my gosh

  • “Let go of my arm! I had no choice! I had to bring the faeries a sacrifice or they would drag me into their world! I’m sorry but this is the way that it has to be!” AU
  • While walking home one night, Character A looks down at their phone for just a second, but when they look up the familiar street around them has melted into a strange, eldritch parody of itself. Scared and confused, Character A watches in horror as a figure detaches themself from the shadows and makes their way over to Character A. The figure is terrifying – beautiful to the point where they frighten Character A – and they explain that Character A has accidentally wandered into a fairy’s territory and that they’ll need to pay a toll/solve a riddle/outsmart the fairy in a game/etc. in order to get back home.
  • “You’ve made a very bad choice, human. Don’t you know if you eat any food when you’re in fairyland then you’re here forever?” AU
  • After making a deal with Character B, a fairy, Character A has been working for years to pay off their debt. Character A has learned to curb their screams whenever they’re approached by fairies – the hollow eyes and abnormally skeletal bodies never stop terrifying Character A – but lately the fairies have been restless, and Character A thinks it might be time of the year where they begin looking for human sacrifices again.
  • Character A is a fairy that was born with a certain knack for glamour magic. Where most fairies can make themselves appear human, they still have an air of unsettling alienness that tends to unnerve humans. Character A can pass with ease, and they use this to their advantage to lure humans into fairyland. One night, while toying with humans at a popular club, they run into Character B, a human that can see straight through Character A’s glamour and sees their true form.
  • “My eyes? Funny story. I used to think I was crazy because I kept seeing things that weren’t there, but it turns out that I had the sight…’had’ being the key word here. I saw a fairy’s true form and they replaced my eyes with gems/flowers/sea glass/etc.” AU

princewarblersteenagedream  asked:

Does net neutrality have anything to do with streaming limits? For example if you want more than X Gb of streaming you must pay more?

The FCC’s 2015 net neutrality rules didn’t ban data caps (including for streaming services), but it allowed the Commission to review specific plans on a case-by-case basis if it looked like they were being used in a way that violated net neutrality principles. The rules focused principally on banning Internet Service Providers (ISPs) from engaging in throttling, blocking, and paid prioritization. These rules more colloquially forbid the creation of “fast and slow lanes,” which means packets of data from all websites are treated equally. ISPs can still charge users for the amount of data they use. Net neutrality is really about ensuring that Internet users get to decide how they use the bandwidth they’re paying for; ISPs shouldn’t be permitted to block access to certain websites just because those websites didn’t pay the ISP a toll.

One of the more controversial parts of the 2015 net neutrality rules is the treatment of so-called “zero-rating” plans. Zero-rating is the practice of not counting certain websites or applications toward a user’s overall data cap. These programs are controversial because zero-rating arguably violates the spirit of net neutrality by distorting competitive markets. Just as we don’t want rich companies to get a leg up simply because they can pay for faster access to end users, they shouldn’t get a competitive advantage over startups simply because they can pay to exempt their services from data caps.

———————————————————————






































———————————————————————

If your post is longer than this you have to pay a toll

I Trained Crows To Bring Me Quarters

By reddit user LeoDuhVinci

In college, I struggled to make ends meet.  Most of my meals consisted nearly entirely of ramen noodles, garnished with a scrambled egg if my finances were stronger than usual, combined with the weekly splurge of a candy bar and soda each Friday.  I worked a part time job, but city rent was expensive, my classes were too tough to work more than twenty hours a week, and my parents had cut me off the year before.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Don't "net neutrality" laws create precident for government interference in the web? Don't we have more examples of government interference in the free exchange of ideas than companies? (Think China's "Great Firewall.")

Net neutrality rules actually set the exact opposite precedent: they promote the free exchange of information by preventing cable companies and ISPs from deciding which websites you can and cannot visit. The specific rules at issue in this debate don’t give the government any power whatsoever to limit access to content; they simply prevent ISPs from treating internet traffic unequally. Without net neutrality rules, your cable company could (and likely would) block you from accessing any website that refused to pay a toll, or it could slow down traffic from a company that offered a competing video service. Far from encouraging government interference in the web, net neutrality is at its heart an anti-censorship policy. You’re right that governments are often the worst culprits when it comes to censorship, but there are plenty of examples of private companies—particularly ISPs—limiting user speech. Because anyone you want to communicate with on the web must go through your ISP to reach you, IPSs have the power and incentive to try to profit from this gatekeeper position. Considering most people have at most one choice for broadband access, market forces won’t keep IPSs in line. Net neutrality helps keeps these activities in check, and ensures that cable companies don’t interfere with your ability to interact with whomever you want on the internet.  

Network Neutrality actually does quite the opposite of interference. It is one of the few government acts that has a 1st Amendment value underlying its premise in that it requires the Internet to remain an open platform. With the law requiring nondiscriminatory conduct by ISPs (and the ISP industry has regularly argued they act in a nondiscriminatory way), the Internet becomes the greatest of public forums in history where all ideas and expression by the individual is accessible by the world.

That being said, EFF is always very vigilant about the authorities and arguments made by government over the extent of their power to take action. We’ve had a long history of fighting the FCC in the past on things like the Broadcast Flag, and with that history under our belt we can say the 2015 Order from the FCC got most of it right. There is always some room for improvement, but it is a net positive for free expression.

It really depends on what you mean by “the web.” There’s the network, which is the pipe you get from your ISP, and there’s the applications, which is what comes through the pipe — services like YouTube and Netflix and Tumblr. Net neutrality is about making sure ISPs don’t monkey with the pipe, or the network. It doesn’t have anything specific to do with the applications, which generally rely on having equal access to that network.

More broadly, companies like Comcast and Verizon want to think they’re tech companies just like Apple and Google, but it’s pretty obvious that they’re really not — they provide a connection to the internet, but very few of the actual services you care about on the internet. They’re scared of being “dumb pipes,” which is why they’re all buying big media companies — Verizon bought AOL and Yahoo, so now it owns Tumblr, The Huffington Post, and Yahoo Fantasy Football, which is weird. AT&T is trying to buy Time Warner, which would give it HBO and CNN, among other high-end TV networks. And Comcast bought NBCUniversal, so now it owns NBC and… the Minions? You get the idea. And all of these big ISPs will happily favor their own services given the chance — Verizon already excuses its own go90 video service from its data caps, but watching YouTube will cost you. That just sucks.

But the thing about real tech companies is that people usually love them, because they’ve all been forced to be successful by serving customers well in a really competitive market where another choice is usually just right there. You hate YouTube? You can just watch Vimeo. You don’t like Amazon? You can order from Jet.com. You’re over iOS? You can buy an Android phone. And on and on.

Internet access isn’t like that — you’re pretty much stuck with what you’ve got, and it’s hard to switch. 89 percent of Americans only have two choices for broadband access; over half of Americans have just one choice. These are monopolies, and I think it’s fair to regulate them and make sure the level playing field of the internet is preserved so the real tech companies can continue competing for customers through innovation and service.

Net neutrality is the principle that Internet Service Providers (ISPs), that is, those companies that provide the “on-ramp” to the Internet, should not favor or discriminate against any applications, content and services that make up the Internet. Contrary to what companies like Comcast and AT&T say, net neutrality has nothing to do with government regulating the Internet or the web. In fact, repeal of the net neutrality rules will give the control you currently have over your Internet experience and will give it to Comcast, AT&T, Charter and Verizon.

The FCC has overseen access to US communications networks for over 80 years.  Whether it be the telephone network, cable or broadcasting, the FCC is tasked by law to protect consumers and competition when it comes access to communications networks. That legal authority gives the FCC the power to protect consumers from fraudulent billing, price gouging, privacy violations and anticompetitive behavior by ISPs. ISPs don’t want any government oversight, which is why they are seeking to repeal both the net neutrality rules and the legal authority in which the rules are grounded.

A false narrative.

Net neutrality protections are about making sure that your broadband provider does not interfere with your ability to access the internet and enjoy the content of your choosing. Net neutrality is the ‘First Amendment for the internet’: transparent rules aimed at enabling the free flow of information are what made the internet great in the first place.

In 2015, the FCC adopted several different net neutrality protections. The FCC said your broadband provider could not block or throttle content you were trying to reach, couldn’t accept payment to pick winners and losers online, and could not otherwise get in the way of the legal content you are trying to reach. It also said your broadband provider had to be transparent with you about the service it was offering.

In an ideal world, competition among ISPs would weed out the worst effects of unfair practices like site blocking and throttling. Unfortunately, we’re not in an ideal world. In most of the country, broadband ISPs have no incentive to improve their customers’ experience because there’s no competition. And these monopolies were effectively created by state and local governments: if only one ISP has permission to build and use infrastructure in your town, then competition isn’t a very useful lever for pushing that ISP to act fairly.

We can and should work on building meaningful competition among ISPs, for lots of reasons. But the clear, light-touch rules set out in the Open Internet Order set a basic floor for what all users should have the right to expect of ISPs.

The only people who think having laws that protect consumers equals government interference are those that stand to profit the most when no protections exist. But to be fair, no one wants either a government or a corporate take over of the Internet. Luckily, net neutrality prevents both. Net neutrality ensures that no single actor can prevent anyone else’s legal web traffic from flowing. Because of net neutrality, your digital content can’t be blocked, throttled, or slowed because of where you live, what you believe, or how much you pay. Net neutrality protects everyday people, small businesses and business born online that never could have existed without an open Internet. The words “government takeover” are being used to conceal the fact that the only group seeking to take over the Internet are the large incumbent Internet Service Providers who stand to make a killing if they defeat net neutrality. Hopefully, smart people like you won’t let that happen.

AN: So…I went and did it again, I sort of veered way off of what the prompt wanted. Whoops! I still hope the anon liked it who requested it! *I do not own the gif, found on google. Please ignore any spelling errors!

Pairing: Steve X Reader

Prompt: !.) AU prompt: Person A is thinking sexually graphic or generally odd thoughts and suddenly panics and thinks “If you’re a mind reader, cough right now.”Person B coughs. but like Person A is having sexual thoughts about Pietro or Steve and they weren’t on the mission with AOU so she doesn’t know Wanda or her power and haha

2.) For all of you who dropped a “More smut please!” in my inbox. Here you go babes.

((I pretty much left out the whole coughing bit, sorry!))

Warnings: Smutish daydreams. Not for the innocent eyes.

~*~*~**~*~

“Daydreams”

~Reader~

He was stunning. Everything from the color of his eyes to the shapes of his lips made you feel weak at the knees. Even just sitting there, minding his own business and reading the newspaper, he looked like a god.

Keep reading