pay-up-sucker

rose-draconum  asked:

Ace Fred Weasley II would get one of those prank cans that when opened would create an explosion of purple and black glitter with an Ace Pride flag; he sets it off at Weasley Family Dinner to come out. Afterwards, his father is so supportive that he creates a new line of Pride gear at WWW -R

Fred II has been wanting to come out as asexual for a while now. But he wants to come out to his parent’s first, and he wants to do it in just the right way. Inspiration is slow to strike, but it’s okay. Fred’s good at waiting. He’s the kind of kid who can be the life of the party when he wants, but otherwise can go pretty unnoticed - useful for collecting all types of information that he absolutely never uses to blackmail his cousins into doing all sorts of hilarious things. Point being, Fred is patient. He wants to come out. Wants to share this with his parents. But he can wait until the time is right.

Fred really went into the muggle store on a dare. Turns out that the prank shop was a goldmine. Fred II walks out with an exploding prank can and a huge grin on his face. Dinner tonight is going to be the best. With a little creative spellwork, he transforms the green shamrocks into purple and black glitter and the snake into an ace pride flag. He’s finally ready.

~

The flag hovers over the table and in the brief moment of silence - a rare occurrence indeed - Fred II wonders if this was really the best way to come out. Or maybe he should have come out to just his parents. He’d just gotten so excited and wanted to share it with everyone at once -

“I KNEW it!” Rose roars, standing triumphantly up. “Pay up, suckers!” And suddenly money is being quickly exchanged between all of his cousins.

“I don’t -” Uncle Ron is saying before Hermione cuts him off, reminding him that it’s the ace pride flag.

Uncle Harry, who’s sitting the closest to him, slaps his back in a friendly manner. “Welcome to the Club,” he says. “Charlie’s president, so we don’t meet much since he’s away all the time,” he smiles and winks. Fred rolls his eyes.

Grandma is leaning over past grandpa and reaching towards his wrist. “Oh, really, now, Fred. You know I love you,” she says before turning to Teddy to give him a pointed glare. “What exactly was wrong with just coming out? Now you’ve turned it into a competition between everyone, nearly giving me a heart attack every time someone comes out,” she admonishes. 

Teddy simply winks and gives him a thumbs up, a gesture James copies.

“Thanks, Fred!” Rose grins, stuffing her pockets full of money, clearly having taken the largest share of the pot from their cousins. “Oh, and congrats on finally coming out.”

“She means thanks for trusting us enough to come out to us,” Hugo corrects, starting a small bickering match between his sister and himself.

And then Fred is being enveloped in a ginormous hug from his father, who doesn’t bother to say anything.

Mum quirks an eyebrow at him once his dad has quit hugging him, a huge grin still on his face. “Is that all spelled? You know we’re going to talk about that later. But I’m proud of you for telling us,” she says with the barest hint of a smile.

~

Two weeks after Fred II comes out, and dad drags him to the shop.

“Dad, I’ve seen the new puking pastilles. The old ones were better.”

“Pish posh,” dad says cheerily. “Besides, this is something new. Just wait here.”

Fred rolls his eyes but stands obediently where his dad asks, near the front of the shop.

“Ta-da!” dad shouts, while at the same time the shop briefly flashes purple, black, and gray, before the color goes right again. Streamers burst down from the ceiling and mini-pride-colored-fireworks go off (one in the shape of a dragon, which Fred files away to absolutely get one of those), and then several new stands pop up in the store. Fred recognizes various pride colors amongst the stands: aro, ace, bi, gay, lesbian, pan, genderqueer, trans, and nonbinary. Others he doesn’t recognize but has no doubts they’re pride-related.

Dad pops down from upstairs right next to Fred, apparating even though he only had to go down a few stairs. “Look,” he says, dragging Fred along the stands. “Candy that lets you breathe a burst of fire in the pride color you buy, some of those cool exploding cans you found that burst into pride flags, plain hats that turn the wearer into your pride colors of choice, pins to show your pride that disappear after a day, lollipops that make the person eating them spout out random messages of support and understanding, and - okay, yes, there are puking pastilles here, but they give you multi-colored pride puke. Not very useful for getting out of class but good for grossing your friends out. It’s not everything, either, just my start! I’m going to offer a permanent pride line here,” dad presents, a huge grin on his face.

Fred lets everything sink in slowly. He feels the grin slowly spreading across his face. “Oh. Dad. I have so many ideas,” he says.

~Hufflepuff Mod

2

Requested by anonymous


“Stop ordering me around Jackson!” you growled, shoving the other teenager.

The two of you were stuck in the small square that served as the jail for the game. You had been dumped here with Percy after the two of you got caught trying to get the flag. You put the blame on Percy because he had given your position away by shouting at you.

“Real mature (Y/N), resorting to shoving, really?” Percy replied.

“You’re the one ordering me around like I don’t know what to do. Its capture the freaking flag!“

"We can’t do it if we don’t work together!”

“You think I don’t know that? Nobody else is taking the initiative to get the flag!”

“Yeah? And look where that got us.”

“Nobody said you had to come after me!” You could feel the beginning of storm starting in response to your anger and you pushed it down. It was times like these you cursed being the daughter of Zeus, if only because you couldn’t lash out at Percy for being stupid.

“When you left we only had three people protecting the flag!”

“Oh only three?” you said sarcastically. “They didn’t have anyone protecting it and now half the team is here! I could have gotten the flag, but you don’t trust me!”

Percy opened his mouth to deny that and you scoffed.

“Save it,” you snapped, turning away and scanning the tree line for your teammates.

The silence was heavy and you tried not to let it bother you.

“I was worried,” Percy admitted.

“Worried I’d fuck it up for the whole team?” you spat, not ready to let go of your anger

“Dammit (Y/N). Why do you have to be so argumentative?” Percy shouted.

"You don’t have to respond,” you pointed out.

Percy sighed and you smirked, knowing you had gotten the last word in for now.

Eventually your teammates got the two of you out and you got back to your side to work out a new strategy.

“Y/N the stealthiest so we should send her over to scope out what their side looks like now and keep everyone else to protect the flag,” Ellie, a daughter of Athena, suggested.

“That’s fi-”

“I don’t think so. I’ll go,” Percy interrupted.

“As if. You’re not stealthy at all!” you shouted. There were nods around the circle of people strategizing and you smirked.

“Okay I’ll head over there now. Meanwhile you stay put,” you said pointing to Percy.

“Like hell I’m staying pu-“ he was cut off by you standing on your toes and pressing a chaste kiss to his lips.

“I’ll be right back,” you said, darting away before he could respond.

The game was won easily after that, your intel without being detected helped your team find the patrols and guards and single them out to bring them back to your ‘jail’.

Eventually there was only a few of the other team left and they were crowded around the flag.

“Now’s your time water boy,” you whispered, mostly to yourself as you crouched in a tree above the flag.

While the team was distracted you would grab the flag and pass it off to your faster runner to bring it back to your side.

The plan went off without a hitch and your team began the celebrations the second they arrived back at camp. You smiled at their excitement, but your eyes were looking over the crowd for Percy.

“Good game (Y/N),” Percy said from behind you, making you jump.

“Yeah. Good thing you didn’t come with me,” you said, trying to ignore his smirk at having startled you.

“You know if you liked me you could have told me instead of pulling on my pigtails like we’re in elementary school,” Percy commented, ignoring your jab.

“As if Percy. I only did that to shock you into silence. I know you’ve never been that close to a girl,” you taunted, trying to cover up the real reason you had kissed him.

You weren’t going to lie to yourself and say he wasn’t attractive or that you had never noticed that there was something between the two of you, but at the same time he was so infuriating.

“Oh really?” Percy asked, stepping closer to you. “That’s the only reason you did it?”

You swallowed and nodded.

Percy hummed with a devious look on his face.

“Whatever you’re thinking of Jackson, stop it,” you snapped, trying to push aside your nerves at his close proximity.

“Oh? And if I was thinking about kissing you again?”

You pursed your lips and Percy’s smirk widened.

“Quit messing around.”

“I’m not joking,” he said lowly, grasping your waist and pulling you in so your noses brushed.

Your eyes widened, before you tamped down your surprise and looped your arms around his neck. He seemed surprised at your actions and you grinned.

“Are you gonna kiss me or should I go find someone else?” you taunted. That remark made Percy scowl and kiss you, his hands tight on your waist.

The shouts and whistling from behind you had the two of you breaking apart guiltily.

“I called it!” Ellie shouted. “Pay up suckers!”

anonymous asked:

K proposes to R in front of the superfriends and M+A are so proud and Winn is so happy and James is proud of Kara for finally growing a pair and asking R?

Originally posted by emiliaclarq

“Great, now I have two little sisters to watch over,” Alex wrapped an arm around you and hugged you.  “Happy to have you in the family, Y/N.”

“Thanks,” you laughed breathlessly and blinked another wave of tears out of your eyes.  

“I’m proud of you, Kara.  You finally did it,” James pulled Kara into a hug and patted her on the back.  “I owe Winn $20.”

“Pay up, sucker!”

Going to go for the Newsies on this one, purely because I can remember them better than the Jacobs. Apologies in advance for the bad attempt at accents and characterisations- it’s my first Newises fanfic. Either way, enjoy.


“Are you sure we should be doing this?”

Jack sighed, his irritation at the repeated question beginning to show, but did his best to not seem disgruntled by Davey’s nervousness. It was Davey that had suggested telling the Newsies about their emerging relationship; he had been excited at the idea, happily telling Jack they could act as a real couple and Jack had readily agreed, knowing that the boys at the lodging house wouldn’t mind one bit. Their relationship had been a secret since a month after the strike, when Jack had foolishly kissed David on his fire escape, only to be surprised when he was held firmly around the neck to keep him in place. From then on all interactions had been behind seventeen closed doors, 100 security guards and countless measures to make sure they weren’t caught.

“O'course we should Davey! And hey, what youse worrying ‘bout anyway? All the boys like me enough that they wouldn’t even dream a hurting youse.” His wicked grin and relaxed manner didn’t seem to help David, who stood pale and sweaty outside the door to the bunk room.

“Yeah, but I-”

“Would you calm down Mouth? I know these guys, rather well if I may say soes, and I know they ain’t gonna do nuttin bad.”

“Look, I understand but-”

Too late. Before David could complain anymore, Jack propelled him into the room, shackled their hands together in a tight grasp and calmly shouted to all and sundry that him and Davey were together and any problems could be solved with his fist. Davey flushed dark red, his shoulders hunching; Jack could practically hear his mind screeching in embarrassment. There was silence in the room; even the beds seemed to stop making noises - well, there is a first for everything. All the boys just stared at the two in open mouthed shock. There was some nervous shuffling (or rather a lot from David) and Jack began to wonder if he hadn’t overestimated the Newsies attitudes.

Davey began to pull away from Jack, embarrassment and fear causing him to retreat, when the silence was broken by a very loud and obnoxious voice.

“Pay up suckers!”

All the boys groaned at Race’ triumphant voice. They should have known better not to bet against when the two would finally tell them.

A COURT OF LOST THINGS 10

TENTH CHAPTER

        “Knew it!  Pay up suckers.” the queen says to my astonishment.  Calev just grins and leans back in his chair as they all start chuckling and money is handed over.

        “Wait! There was a bet! What?”  My voice is shrill as I pipe in and everyone’s eyes go to me.  The queen just grins and leans back with a smirk.  The door suddenly opens and Alistair swaggers in and drags out a chair next to me. Sitting down, he smirks at Anya and Anya rolls her eyes, looking away.

        “So,” Fenrys says, “Calev have you seen your mate fight yet?”

        “No.” Calev says with suspicion.

        “Well, I have and you are a lucky male.” he grins. Before I knew it, Calev is suddenly launched himself across the table with his hands wrapped around Fenrys’s neck. Fenrys just started laughing. Groaning, I jump up and with a flick of my hand, night pulses and pulls Calev off of Fenrys.

        “Fenrys, you should stop pushing his buttons.  They haven’t even fu-”

        “Alistair! Watch your mouth.” I snap.  They all laugh at my red cheeks.

        “Calev,” King Rowan’s voice is low with concern.  “What will you do when Seren and Alistair go back to Velaris?”

        “Go with them, naturally.”  

The whole room goes completely silent.

        “No, what if they hate you?  We don’t know these fae.” the queen says, slightly hysterical.

        “Excuse me, that is our family.” Alistair snaps.  That’s when all hell breaks loose as shouting snarls throughout the room.  Calev jumps up and starts snapping at his father.  I can’t take it anymore; my head feels as if it will burst.  A hand is on my shoulder, Alistair can see the signs of a panic attack but he was too late.  Dark claws gripped my heart and I felt like I was imploding as night coated the room. All the shouting in the room died down before silence fell

        “Breath, Seren.  Breath. Count 1…2…3…Calm down and listen to my heartbeat.” Alistair’s hands gently soothed me as he massaged my shoulders.  Slowly, so slowly, the claws let go and I could breathe again.  Night dissipated and I could see Alistair’s worried face in front of me.  Tears started to flow down my face and Alistair clutched me tight.

        “I want to go home, Alistair.  I need to go home.”

        “I know. We will get back soon.”  My parents also helped me with these panic attacks and when without them, then Alistair would help.  Yet the attacks started to get worse as we had discovered when we went to the winter court for the summer.  It was the worst summer of my life.  It was time for us to go because if I couldn’t control these panic attacks then I couldn’t control my powers.

I stood up slowly as I got my bearings.  Alistair gripped my arm as my wings draped on the ground.

        “Calev, our mating bond is not finalized; you needn’t come with.”  That’s when his face was inches from mine as he said,

        “When I told you I wanted to meet your family, and I wanted to swim with you off the coast of Velaris, and I wanted to walk through the streets with you…I meant every word.  I will never leave your side.  Till the stars fall to the earth, I will be by your side.”  Tears fill my eyes and Calev gently wipes them away then turns to his mother and father, “I am leaving with Seren.  There are no questions about that.  I belong with her and if that means going to Velaris, then I will.  We will leave tomorrow with the wryd keys.”  He turns back to Alistair, “Please take Seren to her room and help her get packed.”  Calev presses a chaste kiss to my lips before pulling away to talk to his family.  

As Alistair takes me out of the dining hall, I look back at Calev, at his commanding posture and thought, he’ll make an amazing high lord some day.   

        Once we enter my rooms, I find myself thinking about what I would show Calev first.  Probably the rainbow, yes, and then show him my mother’s shop.  I would have to take him to the coast next and then walk barefoot in the forest together.  Sit all day eating berries and telling each other jokes.  We could find a townhouse to live in. No, I would rather live in a place like the house of wind.  He could show me his powers. The beautiful flame and the beautiful wind.  It then occurred to me he could warm a bath mighty quickly.  My cheeks heat as I think about what he and I would be doing in the tub.

        Alistair breaks my reverie by tapping my shoulder.

        “Your boy is a great male, he will fit in well with our family.  Though I think dad, uncle Azriel, and Uncle Rhys are going to give him hell first.  I can’t wait to see them fight, it’ll be great.” he chuckles.  “Can you imagine the Archeron sisters making him cower in the corner?”  We both start laughing at that.

        “Aunt Nesta is the one to run from.” I giggle.

        “Mom will definitely put him in his place.” he chuckles.  “I’ll let you sleep.  It will be a long day tomorrow.  Although maybe you would like to take that final leap with Calev.  I don’t know another time it will work and do you want to do that around your parents?”  I blush and roll my eyes.  With a chuckle he leaves.   I shuck off the annoying dress I’m wearing and then just crash onto the bed.   As soon as my head hit the pillows, I am out.

        The sea crashes before me and my toes sink into the soft sand.  A tiny breeze blows my onyx locks from my face as I tilt my head back and close my eyes.  Chatter and laughter are blown from my ears and kept in the city.

        “Seren,” says a female voice to my right.  I turn to find my father there.  He tilts his face to the wind as I had.  His own black hair rippling with the wind.  I try to speak to him but the voice calls me again, this time behind me.  When I turn, I see my mother standing there.  She’s always been the most beautiful female I had ever seen.  She tilts her head to the side with a small smile on her face.  Chestnut hair is swept back into a braid and she wears Illyrian leathers.  Before I can think I am running toward her and hugging her tightly.  She gently runs her hand over my hair.

        “My sweet dove.” she murmurs.

        “Momma.” I whisper.  It had been so long since I had felt my mom’s embrace.  I didn’t want to let go but I knew we had limited time.  “Mom, Alistair is with me.  He found me.  We are hopefully coming home tomorrow with Calev.”

        “Oh thank the cauldron.  Wait who is Calev?”

        “Dad didn’t tell you?”

        “He told me you had a crush on a prince.”  I blush but nod.

        “Anyhow, we will be here tomorrow.  I cannot wait to see you all.  The panic attacks have started.”

        “Oh dove, you will be home soon.  But I must confess not all is great here.”

        “Whats…” I pause feeling myself awaken.  “Oh no, I love you and I love you all, please tell them.”

        “I love you too.”

      I blink blearily in the darkness as my eyes adjust.  What woke me?  I found the answer when I see the door being closed quietly and as Calev turns to me, he sees me laying on the bed, half naked, and he froze.  He licked his lips and a fire lit his eyes.  I knew what he wanted.


written by me

edited by @crazy-fangirl16


Smut chapter next

Tags: @littlxshit @illyrianinterrasen @feyrethedarklady @asta0106 @alyduck @crazybookladythings @jaredjohnson1 @sarah-akhavan @geekygirlinthetardis @darknesswearsangelswings @wolffrising @illyrian-wingspans @lets-continue

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itsalwayssunnyineverbloom  asked:

i already posted my conspiracy theory that they did it because fuck the coli grinders, yours at least has a reason other than spite.

My friend (and myself) also has a theory that the staff never wanted the coli to be as essential to the game as it inevitably became (and honestly, what did they expect?  fairgrounds maxes out at 75kt a day, elemental holidays REQUIRE the coli if you want more than one of everything, and half the Swipp trades are coli exclusive items) so we do believe there’s an element of “fuck coli grinders” in here somewhere

But because the coli is so intrinsic to gameplay, why not make the most essential stone a bitch and a half to get, hiking the price way up and beyond reasonable, thus forcing people to buy gems and put money in FR’s pocket

“You wanna join Coli Club?  Pay up sucker, you’re ours now” staff, probably

Imagine Telling the Team You’re Pregnant

Summary: Imagine telling the team that you and Hotch are pregnant.

Warnings: Pregnancy

A/N: None. Super fluffy!


“We have to tell them soon, Hotch!” Your stomach was starting to show and you were beginning to run out of big enough shirts to hide your small baby bump. “Eventually I won’t be able to hide it anymore.” You were whisper-yelling this to him in his office, trying desperately to convince him.

“I know. I know. I’m just –” He stopped for a moment as someone walked past his door. He moved towards it to shut it. “I’m concerned about your placement on the team. I don’t want you to get transferred out.”

“I understand that, but the little one can’t be hidden for much longer.” You closed the distance between you. It took everything in you to not place your hand on his flushed cheek.

Keep reading

therearenohooksinme  asked:

prompt: in which jack and rhys are professors at a uni and their students don't know if they're dating or if they hate each others' guts bc when they're usually seen together they're arguing about something, but then a couple students saw them having lunch or coffee together and being friendly and so no one knows what to think??

I hope Angel POV is acceptable!! Also its basically an Angel/Gaige meet cute w/ rhack mentioned so. Hope you like it!

Keep reading

Pay up sucker

Me: you love me jesse?

Jesse: SHUT UP!!!

Me: oh really? Are you having sex with my lover boy tonight? Because you are not talking to me very nice!

Jesse: it’s not nice at all and I want you to explain to him that that is how he acts when he’s always so rude and disrespectful to you.

Me: no I’m not talking to him. *arms crossed

Jesse: because he’s so rude and disrespectful to you?

Me: mmhmm hide me!

Jesse: and she figured out why she faints. It’s because she’s _afraid_ of you. Now how long do you think that’s going to last? She just figured it out today

DRS: I think… she’s a genius, so it would be… not very long?

Jesse: and do you thunk she really needs me to protect her or was she just playing?

DRS: you were just playing?

Me: YES DIPSHIT! I FUCKING HATE YOU!!!! YOU RUINED MY LIFE AND DONT THINK I WONT FUCKING STAB YOU IN YOUR FUCKING GUTS CAUSE I WILL AND I’LL MAKE SURE YOU’RE ALIVE AND FEED THEM TO YOU WHILE THEY’RE STILL ATTACHED!

DRS: talk about eating shit

Me: stupid mother fucker you got one right!

Jesse: and now about your chance?

DRS: we will talk about that later, right now I think I mean gather she’s a little upset

Me: we won’t be talking we will be stabbing. And I’m going to shoot you in the knee caps I always wanted to do that

DRS: you know what I am going to do to you? Nothing because I’ve done enough. I will be talking to you later Jesse

Jesse: no you won’t

DRS: oh yeah I will

Me: about shoving your dick up his ass and saying “oh yeah baby! Sabrina! That’s the stuff chocolate is made of!!!”? I’m not that stupid. It’s SHIT!!!

Jesse: oh no. I don’t want to laugh [and he loses composure and laughs like crazy] that’s hilarious! Only my baby would say something like that!

DRS: you think that’s funny?

Me: not as funny as your penis!

Jesse: covered in shit or not? idk. I hate not to ask!

Me: it looks bigger covered in shit!

Jesse laughs hysterically: oh my god that’s my baby! Shit yeah! No one else!

Junior: no one knew mom had it in her. I sure didn’t

Me: his dick? He sure wishes

Junior: no I mean when you fight with dad you’re always so worried, like toy don’t want to upset him

Jesse: she doesn’t! She just doesn’t know who does what. But I’m telling you he does and he’s going to pay. “Pay up sucka” remember this tattoo? Ask Sabrina where it come from

Me: first let’s recap I saw it on TV when he got it. My dad had me go running in to see it and Jesse said that he came up with it in a dream. And Jesse said that people were bothering him NAMELY YOU, YOU STUPID MALE CUNT, and so I told him, you got tattoos?

Jesse: and I said yeah I got them

Me: because he said he was always always always bothered by YOU DUMBASS. And I said so get a tattoo and tell him to permenantly leave you alone

Jesse: and so I did and what else? Did you learn in my book just the other day at school? The day that Dejoria said I had to do something about you

Me: I don’t believe she told you to

Dejoria: uh yeah I did

Me: dejoria you’re a lying cunt and do you know why you did?

Dejoria: because I wanted to

Me: and you got married because?

Dejoria: it was a joke

Me: and so you told him because I would figure out because your soul mate would tell me he was in love with me on that very day, do you not realize why you “jokingly” got married?

Jesse: boom!

Me: anyway go be an airhead I don’t need you that’s what he told you that day

DRS: and Jesse I thought you were stupid

Me: anyway I’m not.

DRS: and I told you “cut your hair” ruin your own life. Hurt Sabrina IDC

Me: it’s not my hair. If he cut my hair like that I would kick his ass but I like his hair short

DRS: you liked it long

Me: and I told him I didn’t think I would like it really long like he had it before did I not?

DRS: excuse me miss prissy

Jesse: I don’t appreciate you talking to her Like that excuse you its Mrs Prissy

DRS: hah.

Me: okay retard so the point is I learned in his book that he makes people pay for their fuck ups and so his tattoo which has amazingly stayed in his hand all these years

DRS: yeah I hear it is rare

Me: is because he hates you

DRS: and he’s going to bitch slap me and you’re going to slit my gut?

Jesse: only you wish she ain’t going to jail so don’t even start with me. But Dejoria is. Just you watch.

Dejoria: but I can’t go to jail! KENNY!

Kid Rock: I ain’t Kenny Rogers so go shove that one up your ass it ain’t a pickle either. Sabrina how you doing baby?

Me: pickly?

Kid Rock gets twisted up by DRS

Kid rock: you know what? I’m done. If I can’t talk to her like she’s normal I ain’t going to

DRS: you’re losing a friend

Me: who kenny?

DRS: who else dummy!?

Me: kenny ain’t losing shit. You got your finger shoved up his ass keeping it from falling out!

Jesse laughs so hard it makes me cough: Sabrina!

Me: why is Kenny losing a friend?

DRS: because he won’t talk!

Me: I thunk I can decide MY friendships and YOU won’t SHUT UP and so I don’t want to be your friend and I NEVER WAS

kid rock: case solved you’re not renting my house

Me: yes sir

Kid rock: but you can have Robby go work for you. Am I right?

Jesse: yes

Dejoria whines: kenny

Kid rock: IF THATS WHAT SHE WANTS!

Me: why you being so breathy with him?

Kid rock bends over: you wanna fuck?

Desperate Dejoria tries to suck his dick

Kid Rock: DEJORIA GET OFF!

Jesse: bet you couldn’t believe that after what you read in the tabloids

Dejoria is upset that I’m writing her behavior. Good I’ll tag her in it maybe she will shut the fuck up and leave me the hell alone clutchdust and stay off people’s private zones like I done been telling her a year now.

Me: I got a zit bae

Jesse: okay we are done now Mrs Funny

Pay up, sucker

“Yes, humans, plan for the ZOMBIE” apocalypse!“ the aliens chuckle.

We are revealing their plan because they won’t pay an outstanding bill.

If you are hard up for cash, we can extend a line of credit until your next heist. But if you refuse to pay, we become quite unreasonable.