pay for tax

anonymous asked:

callout post for gilgamesh: spent the ten years leading up to fate stay night commiting tax evasion

OBJECTION,

gil was living as a member of the church during that time, so he’s technically tax exempt! that, and i’m not sure someone who’s been dead for 4,000 years would even have to pay income tax anyway

on the bright side, we can still arrest him for murder 👌

I’m sorry this is the last of the Halloween store blogging but everything here is funny to me, the aggressive normcore hair they are attempting to sell me, the dead look in this adult’s eyes, the tepid smile, the “similar to human hair” that is somehow the most ominous phrasing, the idea that I would pay $14.99 plus tax to purchase a bowl cut

Outlast 2 Jacksepticeye series in a nutshell:

Run!

JESUS! My mortal enemy!

Eww!

Where do I go?

What is that big white light?

F*** you!

F***ing Jesus Christ!

This is f***ed up!

Come on!

Why?! Why?! I’m a good boy! I got to bed on time! I pay my taxes!

Batteries!

I’m so sorry dudes…

This game is going to shorten my life.

Shrek! I’m looking down!

The imagery is amazing.

That is so creepy!

I’m going to look around because I want to find secrets.

This game is so dark!

Kind of disappointed…

Where am I?

Awesome!

Jessica?

So much running! So much hiding!

Needs better pacing.

Not more gospels…

Jack want out!

WHAT THE PHUCK?!

PHUCK YOU!

AHHHHHHHHHH!

Exploring in Colorado

(With reference to this post here)

Required supplies:

  • Water
  • more than that.
  • I’m not kidding people die of dehydration more than anything else I’m talking 2 liters minimum.
  • snacks
  • first-aid and survival kit including after-bite, splint supplies and emergency signalling devices, and a thermal blanket.  I am absolutely not kidding people get lost a mile from the road and die of exposure.
  • Map, your phone won’t work more than a mile from city limits.
  • change of socks.
  • something iron.
  • an offering or three.  you might not need any, you might need all of them.

Etiquette:

  • Always close any gate you open. Even if the fence around it is gone.  Both from a spiritual perspective and becuase there’s a nonzero chance the farm isn’t abandoned and the livestock is lurking in the scrub.
  • Cattle will stare at you.  As long as they’re on the other side of the fence or river or ditch it’s fine.  If there’s no barrier you need to leave.  Range cattle fight coyotes and cougar and the worst of winter and don’t give a single fuck about you.
  • That’s not lore Range Cattle will fucking kill you.
  • Never approach any horse, but especially the ones without humans.  They’re either fae or feral and the odds of them eating your hands are about the same.
  • Drink your water.
  • There are Others in Colorado, but the relationship is not nearly so adversarial out here.  They’re like your neighbors but only sometimes corporeal.  Mind your manners and obey any posted signage and you’ll be fine.
  • posted signage includes trees fallen across paths or washed-out sections of trail (trail closed), bits of dead animal on stumps or fence posts (occupied, fuck off) and the smell of urine (Mountain lion or bear turn right the fuck around)
  • Don’t eat anything you find there unless you brought a permit for it with you.  Anyone who says you can forage on public land is a liar and going to get their ass poisoned or cursed.
  • If you did bring a permit, leave an offering anyway.  The Law of Man is not the same as The Law of Mountains and you need to pay taxes in both.
  • Salute magpies, and any bird larger than them.
  • Everyone going uphill yields going to everyone going downhill, regardless of whether or not they’re human or real.
  • If you’re over 7000 feet and you seem to have picked up another member to your party, it’s just the mountain wondering what’s happening.  It’s like bird watching for them.  Be polite, pick up your trash and call the mountain whatever name it gives you.
  • Drink your fucking water.
  • If you feel like you’re being followed, especially at dusk, you absolutely turn around and tell whatever’s behind you you know they’re there.  This is becuase it’s almost certainly coyotes and they need to be told to fuck off.  If you can see what’s following you, face it and walk calmly backwards towards civilization until it goes away or you’re back in your car.  If you can’t see what it is, tell it you’re headed home now, then you can turn back around and proceed calmly back from whence you came.
  • Do not, under any circumstances, run.
  • things that run are meant to be chased and everything up here is faster than you are.
  • also you’ll fall off a fucking cliff.
  • If you get back to the car or edge of the wild space and still feel like you’re being followed, check your shoes, pockets and any baggage for extras and leave them.  If you’re STILL being followed, they’re being rude and you’re allowed to chuck a rock at them.
  • I’m not kidding about the water.
  • Don’t go into any “abandoned” buildings because 1. there’s a nonzero chance the building isn’t actually abandoned and then you have to explain to the rancher what the fuck you’re doing on their land 2. if it is abandoned it’s probably structurally unstable 3. the only things inside are rattlesnakes and tetanus.
  • Exception to above: if you hear thunder, you’re close enough to be struck. you can step inside then, but do not touch anything, especially the building it’self.
  • You are encouraged to walk out to abandoned tractors and plowshares and touch them.  Don’t move them but stop to say hi and have some water.
  • If you find human remains, don’t panic.  If they’re out there, they wanted to be found.  Write down (you won’t be able to remember later, trust me) where you found them and inform the park service/police as soon as possible.
  • Drink your water.

(Tip Jar)

AUDIO RECORDINGS OF ALL EIGHT KNOWN PLANETS (AND PLUTO)

Hey, space witches! Did you know that thanks to NASA’s Voyager missions in the 70s, we have up-close audio recordings off all the major celestial objects in our solar system. More accurately, they’re recordings of Sol’s electromagnetic waves reflecting off the planets and their respective atmospheres and magnetospheres, translated into sound. It’s great background noise for any cosmic ritual or meditation, esp if you’re trying to invoke a certain planet.

Mercury
https://youtu.be/894Aejo-R0U

Venus
https://youtu.be/-ewPtH31Xr8

Terra
https://youtu.be/NhAXIjJ56xE

Mars
https://youtu.be/8gUx2EQXf88

Jupiter
https://youtu.be/oWTC7P1Dprw

Saturn
https://youtu.be/X_JAvVjKeWI

Uranus
https://youtu.be/yXfJG1gs3b4

Neptune
https://youtu.be/MuODoF16Cck

Pluto & Charon (b/c of New Horizons, we have TONS of new audio)
https://youtu.be/a-D1BQNWm9g

And as if that wasn’t enough, thanks to the discoveries of Arno Penzias and Robert Wilson in 1965, we know that the Cosmic Microwave Background Radiation detectable across the whole sky emits a sound like a brutal howling windstorm. The CMBR is the leftover radiation from the big bang. Cosmic expansion has stretched these waves so far that they have been distorted from high-frequency gamma waves to moderately low-frequency microwaves.

This is audio of the universe’s creation:
https://youtu.be/WB5jmdJvQeU
 

In other news I was reading an article about a public library that has hired social workers because it’s kind of become a de facto homeless day shelter (being one of the few places in town with free restroom and air conditioning) and one complaint was “The number of homeless patrons makes me uncomfortable. The library should be welcoming to all members of the community.“ The cognitive dissonance is truly amazing.

simple is better

modern times: go to college, study hard, buy house and get mortgage, pay taxes, worry about so many things

old times: draw an erotic picture on an auroch scapula and go to bed