dnp videos i would die for

- nail art. phil orders a bunch of nail polish, vinyls, tools he will definitely not use and makes dan his guinea pig by trying to recreate some of the most complicated designs from the internet. in the end, dan tells him to pass on nail polish remover which phil obviously forgot to get, so dan just dumps a container of glitter onto phil’s bed

- candle review. what starts like a peaceful danisnotinteresting video turns into an hour-long unedited mess of dnp arguing about the smells and ordering a shitload of candles for the next video

- making friendship bracelets. dan teaches phil to make bracelets and at the end of the video they exchange their creations, phil’s is a bit wonkier one, dan’s has a rainbow gradient color scheme. since then, we can see them wearing those bracelets all the time

- christmas decorating in a new flat. dnp go out of their way to make the house looks as festive as possible. we get to see them choose the biggest box of christmas lights, buy a huge tree they barely manage to set up in the lounge, and dan hang hundreds of silver stars in the moon room

- controlling each other in the sims. we see dnp create each other in the sims (without the other participating or being in a video altogether), decorating their houses, giving each other pets, careers, hobbies. dan tries to hide how unreasonably jealous he is when his phil sim starts flirting with a random character

- ikea shopping. loading the cart with candles, photo frames, blankets, and pillows. stealing a dozen of free pencils, sitting on comfy sofas, choosing random domestic items like new towels and coasters. “we do need new pillowcases” says dan picking two grey ones without a second thought

Ravenclaw: I’m really dizzy, I can’t see straight, and when I walk I feel like I’ll fall over.

Hufflepuff: Maybe you should sit down for a minute.

Ravenclaw: … no, I think I’m going to not drink any water for 8 hours straight, run around trying to clean things up, and then to top it off, I’m going to drive in the dark in a car that has its windows frosted over.

Hufflepuff: How are you still alive?

Ravenclaw: A question I ask myself every day.

A Bit of Madness (pt. 9)

Part 8

After they’d all had their fill, not that any of them had much of an appetite, the Butler returned, still without Markiplier. “I’ve been instructed by my master to show you to your rooms now. You’ll be expected to stay the night, of course. Brunch will be served promptly at eleven. Follow me,” and then he leads them each to their own room.

“Good night,” he bids them and disappears down the dark hallway, his footsteps echoing through the black.

The Detective shudders. “I don’t know about the rest of you, but I’m going to lock myself in my room until morning and pray that this place doesn’t decide to grind up my bones and use them to make tomorrow’s coffee.” He does exactly what he says and leaves the others standing in the hall.

“Google, contact your brothers and tell them what’s happened,” Dark mutters, heading for his room. “It’s probably best that we all get some rest.”

“You’re not worried about Celine or Amy?” Wilford demands. “Because I don’t know about you, but I’m going to go look for them!”

Damien’s hands flutter anxiously, “I-I’d prefer to go with you. I must find Celine.” He takes a step closer to Dark who almost flinches. “Surely you wish to find her as well.”

Dark’s hand rests on the door to his room, and he rolls his neck in discomfort. “Frankly, I don’t care what happens to her. I just want to get out of here in one piece, got that?” He throws open the door and then locks himself inside.

Wilford glares at the door for a long time before turning on his heel and stalking off the same way the Butler went. “Keep close, Damien. We don’t want to get separated.”


Celine struggles against the straps restricting her arms, head, and legs as someone hums somewhere out of sight. “Oh, you’re awake,” he says happily, leaning over her. “Good to see my patient all bright eyed before we get down to the nitty gritty.”

“Mad? What are you doing here?” Celine continues to pull against the restraints.

Mad chuckles and rubs his hands together. “I was promised a chance to experiment on some interesting subjects, and my curiosity was much too strong to pass up such a marvelous opportunity.” He turns away to retrieve something from the table behind him. “I get the chance to see just how strong this connection between you and Dark is.” He attaches two wires to Celine’s temples and then grabs her chin to force her mouth open and insert something between her teeth.

“You see, the House has shown me many things, just as it tried to show you.” Mad goes over to a device hooked up to the wires and rests his fingers on the dial. “And as strange as it may sound, it still wants Dark, but,” Mad holds up a finger with a devilish grin, “it wants him without you and your brother’s humanity meddling with Dark’s head. That’s why it let you be reborn, don’t you see? To sever the connection.”

Celine thrashes more than ever, but when Mad turns up the dial to the first setting, every muscle in her body goes completely stiff, her screams muffled by the mouthpiece. In a dimly lit bedroom somewhere in the manor, Dark is thrown out of bed in horrible wrenching pain. Lights explode before his eyes, and he can hear Celine’s screams clearly in his ears.

Mad chuckles as the House goads him on to turn the power up higher and higher. Until a chair comes crashing down on his head and knocks him out. Suddenly the power is cut off, and someone is removing Celine’s restraints. It takes a few minutes before Celine is able to see and think properly. It takes a moment for her to make sense of Mad on the floor first with the pieces of an old wooden chair nearby. Damien is standing there, pushing her hair out of her face and trying to get her to speak to him.

“Damien,” she slurs, squinting as the light hurts her eyes, “did you just hit someone with a chair?”

Damien looks a little bewildered, back and forth between Celine and Mad. “Goodness gracious, I suppose I did!”

“You did what?” They both turn to see Natemare standing in the door. Only he doesn’t quite look like himself. All color has drained from his skin, and the usually violet streaks on his face have turned black. His mist churns up around Damien’s ankles, gray instead of purple, and nightmares begin to plague his mind.

“Leave him alone.” Wilford, appearing behind Mare, presses the barrel of his gun to the other man’s temple. “Or it’s lights out for good, freak show.”