i’m … dying the new south park video game which will be played by millions of dudebros the world over includes a scene where as part of the character creation process one of the characters points out that you haven’t filled out the gender portion of your character sheet and you get sent to counselor mackey’s office where he says, “oh, you want to talk about gender issues, m’kay” and “gender is really simple. you’re either a boy, or a girl, or you might identify as neither” and then you just… choose your gender… and if you choose to play as a girl or non-binary mackey says “well i guess that retcons the last video game!” (b/c the protag of the last game was a boy) and that’s it, no shitty jokes, you just go on your merry way… what the fuck…
It had been almost three months since you and Jimin broke up. He had been your only boyfriend so far and it had been great. Until after 2 years together he decided he wanted to “see what else was out there”. You had gone through the grieving process where you cried until your head hurt and talked about it with your friends until they were tired of hearing about it. But now you were starting to feel better, like you could maybe start dating again. You didn’t have any interest in getting into a relationship, not now at least. You just wanted to go on dates with cute boys, have fun and most likely never see them again.
You decided maybe this was the perfect time to try Tinder, most of your friends had tried it, and some of them even met their boyfriends on there. Laying in bed before going to sleep you download the app and set up your profile. In the morning when you wake up you go on it to see what guys are out there.. left, left, left.. until one of them caught your attention. His name was Yoongi.
Liam’s current charity drive made me think about his debut solo single release.
So the very lucky winner and a friend will get to hangout with Liam during one of his recording sessions, have lunch with him and walk away with a signed merch (MERCH!!! He already has merch in place?! Yaaas!!!!)
I highlighted the most intriguing part of the prize. The winner gets to listen to a preview of what his upcoming solo music would sound like. That amounts to a worldwide exclusive in listening to Liam’s solo music.
But what I find interesting when I read the terms and conditions for this thing is when would the winner be announced:
It says. JANUARY 27 2017. So I guess Liam’s debut would not be BEFORE THIS DATE. And in addition after the winner is announced the winner would undergo a verification process and that would take time as well:
So I guess Liam would not release his debut single in January 2017. I wonder if this meet and greet would be integrated in his solo debut promo plan. The actual meeting is labeled as TBD so it can be anytime from February 2017 onwards. Oh geez, I think we’ll be waiting a bit longer for his debut then.
Snk Theories: Eren and the mysterious girl in chapter 1
In the newest chapter 88, it’s revealed that Kruger’s full name is Eren Kruger.
Some readers has already pointed out the physical similarities between Eren and Kruger, that there’re possibilities of Kruger is Eren’s biological father.
I tend to believe that Eren Kruger has been reincarnated as Eren Yeager, after he has passed the titan power to Grisha.
Remember the short-haired girl in chapter 1, who appears in Eren Yeager’s dream? (I have colored the lower part of the panel as I keep thinking that she is standing near the sea)
Eren wonders why Mikasa’s hair has become longer, which appears that he mistakes the mysterious girl for Mikasa.
In my headcanon, Eren Yeager has inherited Kruger’s memories BEFORE he has devoured Grisha and obtain the titan power, by the process of the “reincarnation”, that he has his own personality plus some of the memories of Kruger.
So who’s that girl in his dream?
I have a guess that she is Kruger’s childhood friend in the East Sea Clan dwelling on the continent (i.e. Marley’s enemy in the east). Perhaps the scene is about young Kruger must depart from his friend and travel to other place with his parents, that the girl must say goodbye to him—perhaps the East Sea Clan is dwelling near the coast, thus we can see the ocean-like background.
After many years have passed, Kruger formed a group trying to revive Eldia, and he has successfully contacted his female friend in the east and asked her to request military support from her country to fight against the Marley government. As a result, we have this panel in chapter 87:
Nas’ evolution musically and style wise is just fucking perfect. He’s just grown into such a classy and swanky darling gentleman. He could have gotten obnoxious when he got money, well, he did, briefly. But I guess that’s part of the process. Growing past it is the important part. He’s just peak after peak. Nas. Ahhh. He’s such a God
judas has changed quite a bit the past couple months. i used to think he was pretty mellow, and he was, but now he’s super grumpy and flares at everything. guess that’s part of the aging process lmao. when I first got him he used to never build bubble nests and when he did they were very small. as of late now he is working on one every day and they get so big. im so proud of my little blue marshmallow.
Still working on my exam to get into medical school in Italy, I’ve been getting great scores on the online simulator and the admission test is in 16 days but why being prepared when you can be well-prepared?
This is my last shot, I’m risking a lot by putting aside ALL my french classes to work on this. This year I grew up a lot, living far away from home and asking myself so many questions about who I am and what I should do with my life (it’s part of the process of growing up I guess) and among all the things I learned one very important lesson : when you set a goal you have to stick to it and make some very hard decisions sometimes. It wasn’t easy for me to decide to give up on my french classes: I knew that if I kept working on them I would had to lose another year for sure before getting into medical school here (the process is MUCH MORE complicated than this) and even by doing so I didn’t even know if I was going to make it. The only way to start my medical studies next year was to get into medical school in Italy. I had to give up on many many dreams and expectations I had about my future, but now I feel I made the right decision. I’m very close to get it (not yet guys! but close) and now I don’t care about anything else: this is my goal, my life, and I won’t let anyone come in my way.
It’s been two months since I’m on warrior mode, and seeing the results coming is so fu**ing satisfying.
I’ve been pretty busy lately, with the Artbook, my internship and a lot of school stuff including this! I just started a new year at Supinfocom and this year I’ll be working on a short movie project I decided to name “Witch’s Brew”~ Guess what? It’s about a little modern witch!
Here you can find the new design for Abbigail (Abby) and some color tests, I might do a more finished version of that picture soon :3 It’ll be a 3D short film and I’ll try to show you some part of the process if you are interested!
Title: Sex or Drugs? Pairing: Jongup + Reader Plot: Shotgunning is really fun Warning: Drug mention, sex I guess? Making out and oral and shit like that idk. Also, assume that you and Jongup are okay and have confirmed that sex is allowed when none of you are able to process thoughts properly okay thanks. Kinda overstim, fingering, poor Jongup gets his shirt buttons ripped off. Swearing too does that count A/N: Hi I’m really turned on by the idea of shotgunning like woah Requested by: Anon
4.6 fucking k of filth where do I sign up for Hell This was so fun to write omg
It was a process. At first, I had to forgive you even though I wanted nothing else but to hate every piece of your being. That was probably the hardest part. Forgiving someone who’s knowingly hurt you when you believed they would never do such a thing is next to impossible.
Then, I had to accept that you care more about her than you ever cared about me. I still don’t think that you two are cute. I probably never will. But you’re together and you’re happy, so I guess that’s all that really matters. My opinion is completely irrelevant. She probably hates me anyway so it wouldn’t matter.
Then I had to let it go. I didn’t stop caring; I just stopped worshipping the ground that you walked on. I put you down on the same level that we’re all on; the one where we’re all shitty people with good intentions. We screw up a lot. You screwed up with me. I wasn’t so great either. That’s okay. I forgive you. I hope you forgive me, too.
But I knew I was okay again when I listened to “Over You” by Daughtry and fully believe every word of that song this morning. I woke up thinking of a boy with eyes like a storm instead of you and yours that are like a calm sea. (I like ferocious storms of people more than calm and predictable ones anyway.) I listened to “Begin Again” by Taylor Swift and imagined starting over with someone new. I’m over you. I’m okay again. It’s beautiful.
i stopped accepting crap and demanded something more from life // an excerpt from a book i’ll never write #63
I probably got a lot of things wrong in this picture, but I guess that’s what happens when you try to find good references in a short amount of time. But that aside, I was trying out this…I guess, short-hand coloring process? Maybe? I don’t know, but I had to correct a lot of parts. I sorta do like how this came out, though. I think I got the right Pokemon. o.o;
EDIT: I can’t believe I forgot his cast, geez…
13 - MOMMACQ - What’s a mother to do with her child? (Props to Alaina!)
Here’s a better WIP of Maine (I’m going to delete the other one) (I know that the shoulder lines go into the helmet a little, it’s okay, they’re on two different layers and I need the shoulders to stay intact because of reasons)
So this is my process, I guess:
First I draw the Rough Sketch really small just to block out what I want done. Usually I don’t put that much detail in it, but because it’s just a bust, I put a little more.
Then there’s the Cleaned Sketch. This is the part that I use all the references and change anything that needs changing. I’ll try to put as much detail as I can into this one so that I don’t have to rely so much on the references when lining.
Speaking of lining, last but not least, the Lines. I try to follow the clean sketch as much as possible, and I add a little bit more of the finer detail that I couldn’t fit in the sketch.
THE WORLD IS HIS (an exclusive interview with Paolo Nacpil by Alexis Lim)
When did you start to take photographs?
I started taking photos when I was 17, which I guess at this point is already ages ago. It certainly doesn’t feel that way. The interesting thing is that it has always been a continuous learning process, there’s always something that you can always improve on or change or approach a different way. It’s always a constant and fulfilling challenge!
What pushed you to continue pursuing photography?
I’d say that photography has been one of the most fulfilling things I’ve taken up. I’ve seen myself grow and be molded into who I am and a huge part of that is because of photography. It acted as some sort of a synergist in my life. I’ve always been into the outdoors and into traveling and all that, however photography became something that pushed me to take all that to a different level. It gave me even more of a reason to find myself out there in the world trying new things and discovering new places. It helped me break out of my shy shell and made me connect with so many like-minded individuals all over the world. It was also quite neat to have a visual and tangible representation of my artistic progress through time.
We all know that you are a landscape photographer. But what other genres in photography you would like to pursue as well?
I’ve actually shot some outdoor portraits here and there and I found it quite enjoyable. Portraiture in itself is a very broad field and I definitely would love to do more outdoor portraits or shots where people are incorporated into my style of landscape photography.
What was your most memorable shoot?
Oh that’s a tough one to answer. It’s definitely hard to choose a favorite since there’s been so many amazing experiences throughout the years so I’ll just go with the first one that came to mind even though my answer would probably be different each time I’m asked this! I’m going to go with my hiking trip up in the Northern Cascades National Park in Washington. To make a long story short, I flew in that day to Vancouver with the intention of staying in that area for a couple of days and meeting up with my Mom when she flew in the day after. Once I got my rental car from the airport location I then thought to myself that I might as well drive the 2 hours down to Washington State as I’ve never been there yet. So I did just that, drove down there and got to the park. It was absolutely pouring rain but I still hiked anyway on the mountain ridges with water cascading down like impromptu waterfall all over and I took as much photos as I could which was barely any at all, even with raingear for the camera. I then decided to sleep overnight in the car at the park in hopes that the weather would cooperate the day after. Woke up before the sun rose and went out to hike again, it was a beautiful day and I spent half the day just taking in the scenery and enjoying the solitude up on the ridges. There’s just something so freeing and fulfilling after an experience like that.
Anything nature and landscape related and with which I can incorporate a sense of movement. Mountains and seas most definitely!
What is photography for you?
Photography is a means of forever immortalizing a moment in time with your own artistic vision of the scene and a means to share the fleeting feelings and emotions you felt in that moment to the viewers.
Who are the people you look up to in the industry?
I’m actually not the type to be solely influenced by a certain set of individuals; I try draw inspiration from anything and everything whether it be fictional characters in movies, random strangers I interact with, music that I listen to, and whatnot.
5 Weird things we don’t know about you.
1. Not necessarily weird but a lot of people don’t know that I’m actually working in a totally unrelated field - healthcare. They just assume that I travel around all the time I guess!
2. I was not born with curly hair. I guess one of the defining characteristics for me now is the long curly hair. I used to have straight hair though all the way until it turned curly on me sometime in high school!
3. I used to be really shy back then! Examples being me practicing my “speech” when in line to order food at a restaurant!
4. I’m an only child that always wanted siblings. My solution to this as a child was to have a doll that I named ‘Matilda’ who I pretended was my sister!
5. I used to not eat spaghetti or any sort of pasta, french fries, burgers – except for separating the meat and not touching everything else, chicken – except for the skin. This was when I was a really picky eater in my childhood. Grew out of that quickly enough though!
That one iconic photograph you wish was yours/ your shot.
That would be the time-lapse sequences that were shot from the International Space Station. It’s quite literally so otherworldly. It’s such a surreal perspective that I’m not quite sure I’ll be able to see with my own eyes in this lifetime.
What advice can you give to those kids or anyone who are just discovering their knack for photography?
Biggest way to improve your photography is to be highly selective and critical of your work. Put it this way, the artists that you look up to, you mostly just see the top 5% of their work that they publish and you never see the 95% that they consider to not have made the cut. No reason for you let the 95% of your work that is mediocre be your defining factor. Quality over quantity! Find inspiration in anything and everything. If you find a photo you really like, stop and take a moment to analyze what makes it have such an impact. Keep doing this to all the work that you find inspiring. Look at your work in a similar way and imagine what you would do differently or how you could possibly have changed your approach in order to improve the shot you got. Analyze, absorb, and apply.
Words you live by.
I work to live, I don’t live to work.
Be a genuinely good person for the sake of being a genuinely good person.
If you want something, make it happen for yourself.
Paolo Nacpil is a 25-year old BS Nursing graduate at the
University of the East Ramon Magsaysay Memorial Medical Center, and is now working as an Orthopedic Nurse in Florida, USA. Aside from landscape photography, Paolo is fond of doing outdoor activities which include off-roading, hiking, mountain biking, and free diving.
“At work here we do 12 hour shifts, meaning we only have to work 3 days in a given week. It just depends on how I schedule the 3 days that I work so I typically have anywhere from 4 to 6 days off on a regular basis; hence being able to have the time to do exactly what I love which is traveling, being out in the elements, and capturing these special moments.“
(Continued. Previous posts copied and pasted below. I dunno why I feel it’s necessary to write about this. Part of the processing, I guess.)
The night we were re-admitted was the worst.
I sobbed from the moment the pediatrician called at noon, and really, I don’t think I stopped until 6:00am the next morning. We dumped the suitcases out and tried to repack them in a hurry, guessing at what we might need, not knowing how many days we would be there or what it would look like.
They had the light box warmed up and ready to go. Hubs and I were an afterthought, but that makes sense. I slept on a labor and delivery bed the second time around; they had no interest in replacing it with a recovery bed. Baby Squeaks had not reconciled with the light box, and was furious. Furious. She cluster fed and screamed bloody murder every time we put her down … for 12 hours. I sobbed, not wanting to put my baby down, but also knowing that the reason we had been re admitted was so she could spend time in the light box.
I used the f word a lot that night. Hubs wasn’t sure how to support any of it. At one point during the night I choked out that he needed to sign the consent form to obtain a pacifier (I had previously been so sure that she would not receive a pacifier until at least a month old.) He did, but when he came back with it and put it in her mouth, I sobbed even harder and told him to take it out.
There was no reason, really. Just a lot of hormones, stress, and a sick babe.
She finally konked out at about 4:30am, and the night nurse who came in to do her blood draws decided to do the blood draws in the room. Baby Squeaks’ feet were cut up by then (blood draws every day multiple times a day) and she was unhappy. I tried to ignore it the best I could, but the last straw was when the night nurse found the paci and tried to give it to her. I bolted out upright, started crying again and tried to tell her that the paci was a mistake and please, please don’t give it to her.
(After that interaction, I earned myself a visit from the psychology doctorate intern the next day. She was nice, but it was unhelpful. I gave her all of the clinical information she needed in one shot and it worked. She left soon after that. There wasn’t much she could do for me. It was a shitty situation.)
We spent all day at the hospital the next day (dropped to an 11), and the following day after that, it had dropped to a 9.2. The doctor and hospital administrative staff worked their asses off to find two biliblankets we could use at home. There was not one to find in the state of Washington. Hubs and I paid to have two units overnighted up from California.
We were so serious about getting out of the hospital.
There were good things about all of this. Really.
Hubs and I had the benefit of receiving care from the best team of nurses and docs (minus jackass consulting doc). The lactation consultant was our nurse for two days and we received the best instruction. Multiple hours of direct instruction figuring out breastfeeding and pumping. Our night nurses were amazing; they loved Baby Squeaks and approached every situation calmly.
Hubs and I tackled each situation together.
I have a few more thoughts to share about family (yikes) and what it has meant to give up the possibility of ever having a VBAC (it is completely against hospital policy), but for now, we’re home. We currently have the ok to take the weekend off from blood draws, and, if her number is at a 4 on Monday, we will get to start turning off the blanket at intervals during the week (please, all that is holy.) She is cuddly, and sweet, and smells amazing. She hates diaper changes, but loves breastfeeding. She adores her time with dad when we supplement with formula and will pass out quickly on his chest. She has the best sleep noises. Not much of a crier, except during diaper changes and when she has decided that she is SUPER HUNGRY WITHOUT WARNING RIGHT NOW. She has already surpassed her birth weight, so we also have the ok to move to feeding every 3 to 4 hours at night; however, she finds this option ridiculous and will opt to stir at about 2.5 hours.
We practice tummy time briefly (on the biliblanket.)
We read stories.
We share snuggles.
We got a late start to all of this, but we’re trying to make the most of the situation we have.
(Fingers, toes, all appendages crossed for a 4 on Monday.)
Not only was Baby Squeaks’ bilirubin at a phenomenal all time high, the doc who had taken over for the midwife was also concerned about sepsis. And then came the ABO incompatibility issue.
Look. A baby with severe jaundice does not rank very high on the scale of serious baby issues (unless they hang out at a 25, in which case there might be potential long term cognitive damage.). A lot of you all have experienced so many more significant perinatal / neonatal issues
Baby Squeaks was put in a light box and I spent hours with nurses and lactation consultants learning how to breastfeed her around her IV, my IV, and the biliblanket. She had blood draws every 6 hours. Her feet are still cut up from the now daily blood draws.
This is not how one expects this time to happen.
There were a couple of times when Hubs ran home to get clean clothes and I had to call him back after she had high numbers and they started talking helicopter ride again. I had one consultation with a pediatrician who told me that it wasn’t that long ago that infants died from this. (Jackass.)
We were exhausted. She hated the light box, HATED those stupid fabric sunglasses that always slipped down over her nose, and just wanted to be held and cuddled, which we could only do in measured amounts. At one point, our main doc prescribed an ambien for me, which I took, and slept for about 15 minutes before medical staff came in to start talking treatment planning again.
I am not so good at coherent conversations when drugged up.
We stayed in the hospital for 7 days, and were released with this cheap awful light table to take home. We literally had to Velcro her down to it. In the end, it didn’t really matter. The next morning her number spiked to a 15 and we were re-admitted.
Motherhood is nothing like I thought it would be. In most ways, it is 10,000x better than I thought it would be. In all ways, it 20,000x harder than I thought it would be. (@jackiejunee2014 - you may want to skip this post for right now. <3). This is also going to be the first of a couple of posts; Baby Squeaks is cluster feeding and having marathon awake situations (not your typical jaundice baby).
Hubs and I had prepared for labor and delivery. Really prepared. We had read all the books, and in the weeks leading up to Baby Squeaks’ arrival, had spent hours walking, bouncing on the yoga ball, drinking raspberry tea and spending time in the Spinning Babies poses. All things considered, I had always said that despite how difficult it was for us to conceive and the random things that had happened during the pregnancy (bleeding, car accidents, etc.), I was unafraid of the labor process. If we could make it to that point, we would be fine.
I labored at home in fits and starts for two days, and then Sunday, 2/19, began having contractions I could time. At 2:30 in the morning on Monday, 2/20, when contractions were following the 5-1-1 magical rule, we went to the hospital. I was effaced, but dilated to a 1.
A 1. With painful contractions then coming 2-3 minutes apart. I expected to be sent home immediately, but my midwife was a little baffled and gave us the choice of going home or getting into the whirlpool tub. I chose the latter, and practiced breathing through very painful contractions. I continued to efface, but I never dilated past a 3 (a stretchy 3, maybe a 4.) I labored all day Monday, and the terrible back labor that had come and gone in the previous days returned with a vengence. I worked with my nurse to see if we could get the baby to change positions (after the pain was so bad I projectile vomited … onto Hubs, lucky him.) It worked briefly, and then Baby rotated back. I labored all day Tuesday, working with the midwife in different positions for pain relief, and by the mid afternoon, my midwife said that although it was up to me, she was going to strongly recommend me considering a C Section.
At that point, she and my then nurse thought the umbilical cord might be wrapped around the baby in a way that was making it impossible for her to descend. For safety reasons, we chose the C Section.
And I cannot fully explain to you how it is simultaneously true that I would have chosen it again for safety reasons, and how my heart is filled with absolute grief that I will never have had experienced a vaginal delivery. Tear producing, from my gut, grief.
I cannot explain to you the level of fear I felt being rolled into med / surge, or how uncomfortable the sensation of tugging and pulling was, or how the adrenaline and hormones and medication took over and I started shaking uncontrollably (all normal C Section sensations.) I cried when I could hear baby crying, but when Hubs brought her over to me to see if I wanted to hold her, I was too afraid. Too afraid I would drop her due to the amount of uncontrollable shaking.
Hubs was too short to see over the drape, but the surgical team told him that when she was brought up, one eye was wide open, the other squinted shut, the umbilical cord wrapped around her waist, twice around her arm, and she was also holding onto it. Our little pirate. The umbilical cord was essentially acting like a giant Johnny Jump Up; every time she started to descend, it kept pulling her back. Women have successfully delivered through this. Some women have not. My midwife doubts I could have delivered without a C Section.
And when they first brought her to me, I noticed a spot of yellow beneath her right eye and I immediately asked our doula if she had jaundice. The doula reminded me of this later - that I was the first one to notice something so slight, something not quite right, and that I should always, always trust my intuition.
A few hours later, our kick ass night nurse, Bonnie, noticed the jaundice and noticed that it was spreading very, very rapidly. It’s not abnormal for newborns to develop jaundice. It IS abnormal for a brand new newborn to develop jaundice at the rate that Baby Squeaks was. Her bilirubin level had risen to a 15. At 16, they were going to life flight her and Hubs to the city for a complete blood transfusion. (Not me. Still a patient, recovering from C Section). They started light therapy, which seemed to help for a few hours.
(this is the part where Baby Squeaks, in real time, is demanding more food in hungry bird fashion. Well, ok then. Food equals dirty diapers equals elimination of more bilirubin. This will have to be finished later.)
“particularly difficult character” practically equates to Heiji for me, heh – I like him a lot but he is such a pain to write? it is a literal struggle tbh.
that probably has a lot to do with how I tend to write characters: basically by having their voices inside my head, which in turn requires having a workable mental model of what they’d do and why.
this works out great for characters like Kaito and Ai (…by which I mean that if you hacked my microphone last night, you’d have caught me having a conversation between them out loud and just transcribing it as I went along), but completely falls flat for anyone whose personality is significantly different from mine, aka Heiji and Kazuha (it took forever to come up with their dialogue, and lots more tweaking before I felt more or less okay with it).
on the other hand, though, not-difficult characters are still occasionally frustrating to write when it comes to things not shown in canon – what Ai actually thinks about the Org, or Saguru’s current opinion regarding Kid, et cetera…
About your editing comment in the recent ask... while I understand the importance of outlining for a lot of folks (I know some people who can't fathom writing without one), I've never in my life written an outline and only one of my books ever required extensive editing (out of the 13 or so I have published). It depends on how your mind works with the writing process. Everyone's different and not everyone fits into the same sort of box :)
I’m gonna take a wild guess and assume you’ve never watched my outlining part 1 vlog, since I addressed multiple times that not everyone uses an outline. But it does concern me that you don’t extensively edit your novels. I would never recommend that any author, no matter how experienced they are or how they planned or didn’t plan their story, skip an in-depth professional edit.
Note to all writers: do not skip a professional edit. Trust me. It’s a mandatory step.