parents of gays

anonymous asked:

Do Dean's parents know he's gay and in a relationship?

they have suspicions later on and he doesnt tell them for the longest time because hes sure theyd like…disown him or itd be endlessly weird forever, but when he Does tell them theyre very supportive and are good to tony

3

well, I,

Listen.

It’s not okay to have your child be scared of you. That isn’t respect. That’s control. 

It’s not okay to have your child obey you at all times in order for you to love them. That isn’t high standards. That’s manipulation.

It’s not okay to force your child become what you wanted to become. That isn’t wanting the best for them. That’s living vicariously through them.

It’s not okay to take away your child’s basic needs as a punishment. That isn’t teaching them. That’s hindering them. 

It’s not okay to dictate your child’s sexuality or gender. That isn’t normalizing them. That’s repressing them.

It’s not okay to berate your child’s appearance or intelligence for being what you think is sub-par. That isn’t toughening them. That’s bullying them.

It’s not okay to take out your stress on your child. That isn’t parenting. That is abusing.

It’s completely okay to distance yourself from your parents. That’s not unloving. That, sometimes, is self care.

7

Nearly every year, for the past thirty years, Frances Goldin has gone to New York City Pride holding a sign that reads, “I adore my lesbian daughters. Keep them safe.” (x)


“Since the beginning of the parade, I’ve been going and waving my sign,” Goldin said. “It sort of hit a nerve with people, particularly those whose parents rejected them. The response to the sign is always so great — it urges me to keep going.”

“Everybody would come running up to her and cry, kiss her, and say, ‘Would you call my mother?’ or ‘Would you be my mother?’” her daughter, Sally, explained. 


“She’d take down names and addresses and write letters to these kids’ mothers!” 

When asked about all the young LGBT parade-goers who have begged her to speak to their own mothers, Goldin replied, “I think I changed a few people’s minds and I’m glad about that. Everyone should support their gay and lesbian children, they’re missing a lot in life if they don’t.”

As I’ve mentioned before, I was raised in a strict Christian household. It was full of love, but it was also a house that didn’t like Ellen DeGeneres or Rosie O'Donnell simply because they were gay. A house that would turn off the tv when the lesbian episodes of Friends were on (while I ran to the tv in my room and pressed “mute” to see it). One that would roll their eyes at the idea of gay marriage. Parents that meant well and just went by what they were taught, wanting us to grow up with something to believe. I remember sobbing in high school, thinking they would absolutely kill me. Things slowly started changing when I was 16+.

My Mom was the one who asked if I was gay. She was my biggest supporter, my secret keeper, and the one I told everything to. My Dad? He went from not wanting me to come out, to protect me, to telling everyone he knows if they ask if I’m “dating any new guys” - because that’s simply who I am. In his words “why hide it? Who cares?”. My Mom came to me about Carol on her own, wanting to watch it to see the love story. When gay marriage was legalized, I called my Mom sobbing. She was sobbing with me, after yelling “YES! THANK GOD” in front of all of her friends.

After being raised to hate who I was, not even allowing it to be an option - to now, my Mother texting me just now saying “Do you have any more Human Rights Campaign stickers like you have on your car? I want one on mine”

Change is a beautiful thing. Believe in it and believe in people.

THAT’S parenting.

By the way, controlling your kids or invading their privacy past a certain point makes you abusive.

*This stuff especially affects LGBT kids*

It’s makes me so sad like imagine all of those Trans kids out there who can’t reach out or find info or support because their parents monitor their internet activity and they’re transphobic. One of my good friends in Highschool was outed as Trans and her parents called her disgusting.

Imagine kids with depression who can’t talk to their friends for support because their parents have their phones tapped and messed up shit like that.

My little stepsisters mom has her phone tapped and she’s not allowed to talk to boys. She’s fucking 12.

It seems to be becoming more and more commonplace. When I was like 15 all of my friends parents were like that and me being the little bi kid I was, I was friends with a lot of other LGBT kids and almost all of them had abusive ass parents and it was very hard for them to not be outed. We were fifteen year olds and if these kids would have been outed, they’d be kicked out on the street best case scenario. And that’s a whole different topic but for gods sake let your kids have their privacy.

It makes it extremely hard for kids with depression or LGBT kids or any teen with a problem that they can’t come to you about, to reach out and get help. Sometimes kids don’t want to tell you every single thing, sometimes they want to seek other support first before coming to you idfk. If I wouldn’t have had the support of being able to talk to friends and have online support during my depression I would’ve been fucked man.

Please
Stop
Normalizing
Abusive
Behaviour.

Please, let your kids have their privacy. When you do that shit it just pushes your kids away not to mention its abusive. Just stop