It’s okay to feel upset on Mother’s Day, and it’s valid to have mixed emotions about it.
It isn’t selfish to wish you had a different experience with your mother than what you got, and feeling upset or angry with your mother doesn’t make you an ungrateful child.
Not everyone had loving mothers who treated them right all the time, and it’s important to acknowledge that. It doesn’t make you a downer.
Take care of yourself.
there may come a point in your life where you realize that you’re not nearly as close with your parent(s) as you used to be. you may realize that their abuse is the cause of this.
you may also experience feelings of numbness or apathy towards them while spending time with them (willingly or not) or speaking to them. you may not enjoy doing things with them, feeling like you don’t love them anymore, truly. you may feel like when someone asks you if you love your parent, you think: “i have to, they’re my family member.” you may feel as though you miss having a healthy bond with them, if there ever was a time that harbored such.
and that’s okay. those feelings are normal. you may never be as close as you were with your parent prior to the abuse, and that’s okay. you don’t need to pretend to love them if you don’t. sometimes it’s better this way. it doesn’t mean you have to hate them, although it’s understandable if you do. it doesn’t mean you have to never be friendly with them ever again.
healing takes time. if healing means not being as close to your parent as before, then that’s completely fine. you do what you need to do to heal and be happy. you are not alone.
Parents who aren’t cishet are so strong.
People who give birth or carry a child and aren’t women are unbelievably brave and capable.
Nonbinary parents are incredible and just as capable of raising a child of any gender.
Mothers whose partner carried their child are so beautiful and amazing.
Same/similar gender parents are fantastic and loving and able to be just as awesome as different gender parents.
Fathers who carried their baby are unbelievably awesome dads.
Parents who have a surrogate baby for any reason are just as much their child’s parent as they would be if they had/had been able to have the child just between them.
Parents who adopt are so beautiful and kind and are the parent that the child needed, and are just as worthy as parents who don’t adopt.
LGBTQ+ parents are the best and nothing will ever convince me otherwise.