parallels are heartbreaking

Sometimes, I wonder if I somehow stumbled into some kind of parallel universe, some dimension just slightly to the left of our own. As crazy as this sounds, it would make a strange kind of sense, would bring into sharp focus everything that feels just a shade different than it should.

I know it’s ridiculous, impossible really, but is it so out of the realm of possibility to imagine? Maybe I was walking somewhere and tripped a little on nothing, or took a wrong turn late one night on my drive home, something seemingly innocuous that sent me from one universe to another. This divergence in timelines would account for so much, would make the sting of our ending a tad more bearable.

It makes a simple, if cruel, sort of sense: this is merely just the universe where you break my heart. And somewhere, somewhen, else, we overcame the obstacles between us and created something universe-defining.

oh my god. just… the ONLY time we see todd and ken interact the entire series, these two characters that have so perfectly fucking mirrored each other at so many different points, and it’s when they both share this look and little shrug like ‘welp guess i should go look after my weird holistic buddy’ and that’s that and it’s like this pure moment of understanding. perf

If every decision we make or don’t make leads to a parallel universe, it satisfies me to know that there are a few where I haven’t met you and haven’t forgotten how a whole heart beats.

Theory of multiverse comforts me because it means I have made every possible decision and am living a life of every possible alternative in front of me.

There’s a universe where I am happy and there’s another one where I am dead.

How scientific is my understanding or even the existence of multiverse, I don’t know or care about.

See that’s where being a writer comes into play, I can use all the material out there and it doesn’t even have to be real.

Am I real?
It’s been a while since I’ve ceased to feel so.

Sometimes I have to remind myself that I am more than the words I type.
That I can move and run and jump and kiss.
That I can keep aside my book and step outside my room to interact with people rather than the voices in my head.

I don’t feel motivated enough to do so now. I don’t feel strong enough to live a ‘real’ life right now.

But it’s okay, because in another universe, I already am.


ep 33 // ep 58

“I only took the heavenly trial in the Mortal Realm to fulfill your wish. But all the more to fulfill my wish.”

I feel like I’m in the wrong world ‘cause I don’t belong in a world where we don’t end up together, I don’t. There are parallel universes out there where this didn’t happen. Where I was with you and you were with me. And whatever universe that is that’s the one where my heart lives in.
—  Comet (2014)
mariyekos replied to your photo “[4] Hey remember Piffle when Sakura woke up just in time to thank…”

Of course it would be Subaru of all people to catch the girl who had the person she loved the most just throw her away like he never cared for her at all, even though she thought he did…


parallel lines;

we’ll stand idly by, never waving, no good mornings. we’ll never meet in the middle like coffee stains on white shirts. our lives will never mesh like love & hate, juxtapositioning like school children in a war. we’ll stand here, spaces dividing our bodies like pauses in poetry. we’ll never meet like first friends or lovers. we’ll watch each other’s lives pass by, hoping our lines will cross at railroads, but trains collide & burn– we’ll never have the luxury of a fire in our hearts. only stifling silence & broken tongues. it’ll be sad, it’ll hurt, but at least i’ll get to see you cry & i can pretend to hold you close to my chest. sometimes at night, you can hear birds chirping in my ribcage, your name exuding from their whispers. we’ll stand by as life chains us to the tracks & we’ll wish we could run, but life isn’t fair & we are only parallel lines in a world full of crossroads.

She has never believed in supernatural things. It all feels like fiction to her. But lately, she’s been lying awake at night and fantasizing about parallel universes.

Most often, she fantasizes that their paths never crossed. In this universe, she still smiles at strangers. She still dreams about love. She has no clue that somewhere, in another world, there was a boy who loved her very much. She is not haunted by the fact that the very same boy destroyed her. She is still so happy.

So, as she stares at the ceiling fan, listening to the clock tick toward 1am, she wishes so badly that she could exist in that universe instead. Because, after all, maybe it isn’t really true what they say. Maybe it isn’t better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all. Because maybe never loving at all is far less painful.

—  excerpt from an unfinished book #128

at my internship, most of the calls we get are from women who have nowhere to go because they don’t have a single friend or family member available. i’ve heard comments in the past like “how do you not have at least ONE person to help you in a time of crisis??” and you realize how isolating abuse is. it’s crazy. it can isolate you from the whole world and from everyone you once knew and loved. it takes over your life, until it leaves you with nothing