paperbackreiter

“An actor must interpret life, and in order to do so must be willing to accept all experiences that life has to offer.  In fact, he must seek out more of life than life puts at his feet.  In the short span of his lifetime an actor must learn all there is to know, experience all there is to experience - or approach that state as closely as possible.  He must be superhuman in his endless struggle to inform himself.”

~ James Dean

To all my Tumblr followers:

I’ve been on a journey for the last year or so.  I grew, I changed, I evolved.  I found Buddhism, Taoism, Paperbackreiterism, love, life, magic, mystery, myself, and the Universe.

To say it has been enlightening would be a massive understatement. 

I relayed a lot of this journey through my Tumblr, and those that have been with me have born witness to this evolution.

One such follower was the love of my life, Mercede.  We have had an interesting year and a half.  We fell madly in love the day we met, and quickly moved in together and became engaged, and we literally tore up life.  Fires burned, mountains moved, angels sighed.

However, along the way, something went wrong.  A lot of it was external forces, a lot of it was internal development for us both.  We broke, and we had to break, individually and as joined souls.  This was necessary, for in it we found deep appreciation.

We went our own ways, but the Universe never let us forget.  I wrote to her everyday through this medium.  If you read my blog you will see it, vividly.  I was speaking to myself, to her, to the Universe, to all of you as I journeyed.  Most of all, I spoke to her, my Aphrodite.  She was conjoined with my soul, and I had to talk to her.  Unbeknownst to me, she read my blog every single day.  She told me, “I woke up to you, fell asleep to you, and throughout the day, read to see how your day was going."  I hoped she read it occasionally, in reality, she got to watch me evolve, and got to know the real me through my pen and paper, my mind and my heart and soul.  And I said good night to her handprint on my wall and lit a candle for her most every night.

You see, we have been through hell and back.  Everything, literally, has tried to tear us apart.  We both even tried to forget each other and move on, we failed.  The Universe, the Red String of Fate, our souls; never, ever ceased loving.  We grew to love ourselves, and to love each other, more deeply than our mortal understanding.

About a month and a half ago, she made her own tumblr, and followed me.  I have many followers and very rarely check out anyone’s page.  I simply watch my dashboard and comment when something comes across it that inspires me, or if my spark ignites inside of its own volition.  I am a very busy man, and my time on Tumblr is usually minutes a day believe it or not, inspiration speaks, and I write, quickly.  I have maybe looked at 10 to 15 of all of your pages, ever, and likely only a screen or two.  I simply don’t have time.  However, one day about a month ago, I happenchanced and clicked on one of you that liked a post of mine.  The page was named barefootndancin.  Mercede always loved to dance barefoot in our kitchen.  As I read through the first 4 posts, I was struck as if by lightning.  I read a few more.  I knew, it was her.  My love, My Juliet.  I cried as I read more, she was speaking to me, reaching through the Universe to me, and through some random miracle or Red String of Fate, I had found her voice.  I said on my blog, "I see you."  Next day her tumblr read, "I see you and feel you.”

It was her.

A week later, we met in person, angels sighed, demons blushed, the unrighteous scattered, the Universe flocked to bear witness.

This my friends, is love.  When you try to tear it apart, the World tries to tear it apart, and nothing, nothing in the life or death, can tear it asunder.  It simply exists.  It is its own being, it’s own life, immortal.

If you want to bear witness to us speaking to each other as we found each other again, you may take a journey through the dates of our tumblr, and see love figured lost, find love again, and jump off that cliff holding hands.

http://barefootndancin.tumblr.com/

Love and light to you all.

Never, ever give up on love.  We, my friends, are literally, living proof.

~ Paperbackreiter

P.S.  This is the latest picture of us, taken earlier this week as we took a roadtrip together.  We have very few pictures of us together, like maybe 4 total.  We simply prefer to live our life than to look back on it.  She is embarking on a career as a model, and I as a land man, which will take us apart, but never, ever, alone.

Here’s to you love…