paper silhouettes


I’d love you to watch Hate for Sale - A poem by me, animated by Anna Eijsbouts and narrated by Peter Kenny. Two minutes and forty three seconds out of your life…


It’s only taken me over two years, but AT LAST! I’m finally selling some Mystery Twins Silhouettes!!

These are a very limited run of paper silhouettes of everyone’s favorite Mystery Twins, Dipper and Mabel! There are only 11 available, and,  unless I find more frames, there will only ever be 11!

Each silhouette has been cut by hand and they are approximately 5x4 inches.

Due to the limited nature of these pieces, I will only be selling/shipping to customers in the United States, as it makes tracking much, much easier for me. I hope you understand.

DIY: the Poppet Edition

Since people apparently really liked Ada, my joy poppet, I thought that maybe some of you would like a tutorial… So here goes!

Disclaimer: Since I’m in the broom closet and that I’m a real life dollmaker, I tend to make my poppets as complex and “clean looking” as possible so that people assume it’s just yet another of my dolls. You definitely don’t have to do it the way I do it, or even to follow a remotely similar aesthetic.

You’ll need:

• some paper
• a pen
• scissors
• fabric (stretchy is best for beginners)
• a sewing needle and some thread
• herbs
• crystals
• small items
• a taglock (since I only do these poppets for my own use, I use a small lock of my hair)
• stuffing
• something blunt and long, like a screwdriver.

First, draw the body’s silhouette on paper. I try to make mine fairly symmetrical because it makes creating the clothes easier but it’s not necessary. Also, you should think about what you’re planning to use your poppet for. For example, Ada’s job is to bring more happiness in my life and help me fight off anxiety, so she’s shaped like a cat because cats make me happy. Lucia, which I’ll be building in this tutorial, is a mourning poppet: her job is to help me mourn my father, dull the pain and help me accept that everything must end, so she’ll be shaped like a skeleton. Think about what your poppet is for, choose its body accordingly.

Then do an arm and a leg the same way. As you can see, I tried giving her a little hand and curved the foott, but a simple rectangle will do the job just as well. Her leg here is super short because I’m going to make her boots out of polymer clay. I don’t need it to be as long as it should since I’ll glue the boots on later.

Now pick a fabric and draw each part twice. Chose the color accordingly to your poppet’s purpose and your personal taste. Also, if your poppet is going to be small like Ada and/or you’re a beginner… Pick some stretchy fabric, like an old t-shirt! Afterward you’ll have to turn it inside out and the stiffer the fabric, the more you’ll cry. Trust me.

Using an old t-shirt you don’t wear anymore makes your poppet even more personal! Yet another side benefit of loving yourself instead of keeping on using linen because you love the feel of it, but your poppets are pretty much drenched by tears of frustration by the time you’re done. Why do I keep doing that.

Now cut the silhouettes off, leaving some wiggle room. If you use a fabric that doesn’t fray, like an old t-shirt hint hint, you don’t have to leave a huge amount of fabric on the side. If you picked something that was probably weaved in hell, like satin, get your pinking shears out. if you don’t have pinking shears, use some fabric glue to stop the fraying. If you don’t have fabric glue, well. Good luck.

I sorta forgot to take pictures of the in-between stage, sorry. So uh. Just sew the two body silhouettes together, and each limbs, folding them on themselves. Remember to leave a hole big enough so that you can turn everything inside out.

Don’t worry too much about it being perfect: as long as it’s tight enough to not spill the stuffing, it’s good enough. While I try to make my seam lines as discreet as possible (to be more discreet about my practice), I find contrasting seams super appealing visually. So if you want to experiment with that, knock yourself out.

Start stuffing the limbs. For Lucia, I’m using the stuffing I stole from an old pillow. For Ada, I used leftover wool because that’s what I had handy. For others I used rice. Whatever works for you. As you can see, I’m using a screwdriver to push each little cotton ball all the way down. Don’t stuff the arms too much, or your poppet won’t be able to lower it arms. Unless that’s what you want.

For the body, I usually just stuff the head and the bottom of the body with cotton balls and then keep the belly and chest empty so I can fill it up with herbs and items. You could fully stuff the poppet with herbs if you’d like, or just mix a pinch with the cotton balls. See what works best for you.

Here Lucia already has one arm sewed on because I got impatient.

Here, I got my herbs ready in my mortar and put them in a small cup for easy access. Start filling up the poppet’s chest and belly (but not too much, you want some space left). Just so you know, that step tends to be pretty messy so… Do that somewhere where getting herbs everywhere isn’t much of a problem.

Pick herbs related to your poppet’s mission. For Lucia, I used linden (grief-relief after death), thyme (provides strength and courage, wards off grief), lavender (eases heartbreaks, soothing) and sage (self purification, deals with grief and loss, removes negative energy).

I didn’t take the previous step in pictures, because the items I picked where pretty personal and I don’t feel like showing them. But I can list them.

Here’s what I put inside of her:
• pink quartz (for love)
• a skull bead (for death)
• a taglock (I always use a lock of my hair tied with a red thread)
• something that belonged to my dad (it was hard to let go of it)

Again, pick everything according to the poppet’s mission. If you give yours the job to ward off curses or to help you cast spells, your list will be probably very different from mine. Take time to research what you want to use, think of how it symbolizes her mission.

I sewed on the limbs because I felt like it. You can do this later if you want, it doesn’t really matter.

So now the step shown in this picture is “the letter”. It’s an important step because that’s where you state the poppet’s purpose. And it’s also where you name your poppet (names have power, take time to think about it)! It’s not a very complicated step, though, you just need a pen and some paper.

My letters usually go this way:

“Dear (name),

You are my (purpose) poppet. You will always do (thing). You will always help me with (thing) by doing (thing). I give you this (crystal) to symbolize (thing), this (item) to symbolize (thing), this (precious thing) to symbolize (thing). I also give you my (taglock) to symbolize our bound together.

With Love,

(my name)”

Personalize it whichever way you see fit. Fold the letter tightly, put it inside the poppet, finish filling it with the herbs.

Now that the poppet’s all filled up and ready, sew close the hole and sew on the limbs if you haven’t done it already. You can now give your poppet a face. You can embroider it, paint it with fabric paint or acrylic, or use beads, or markers, or buttons, or anything you want. Be as creative as you want.

Once you’re done, you can add a sigil on it (I like to do it some place others can’t see, like under the clothes), and give some hair and some clothes to your little one. Or don’t! It all comes down on your instincts now, what feels appropriate and what doesn’t. Even if your poppet isn’t perfect, take some time to appreciate its existence. At first there wasn’t anything but a bunch of supplies and you made SOMETHING. And if that’s not magic, I don’t know what is.

As you can see on that picture, Lucia isn’t finished yet, but I’m working on her clothes and accessories right now. Once she’s fully clothed and ready, the only thing she’ll need will be to be activated, so I’ll leave her to charge on my altar for one night. And in the morning, I’ll wake her up by kissing her forehead so she can start doing her job.

There was a moon tonight. Within the black-and-silver tunnel of cedars fireflies drifted in fatuous pinpricks. The cedars were black and pointed on the sky like a paper silhouette; the sloping lawn had a faint sheen, a patina like silver. Somewhere a whippoorwill called, reiterant, tremulous, plaintful above the insects.

William Faulkner, from Sanctuary (Vintage, 1931)


TUTORIAL: Making Temporary Tattoos for Cosplay!

Okay, so we know using a Sharpie/Marker for complicated tattoos day-of for a con is a PAIN, so here’s a quick tutorial on the best way I’ve gotten success for really clean and convincing temporary tattoos for cosplay!

First things first, I would recommend getting this Silhouette tattoo paper. It comes with 2 - 8.5″ x 11″ sheets that are printable on Ink Jet printers for only $7! It comes with thorough instructions on how to use the paper, but I’ll give a quick summary.

  • Create your tattoo in the program of your choice. I used Illustrator, but you could also print any PDF or JPG – just make sure the design is mirrored when you print it!! (I’d also recommend printing extras for multi-day use or mistakes when cutting!)
  • After the ink dries, add the clear adhesive sheet (comes with the Silhouette kit) over the top and smooth out any air bubbles.
  • Then (and this is really important!) cut our your tattoo as close to the edges as possible! You don’t want the design to fall apart, but the more white edges you leave, the more shiny adhesive will show up on your skin.
  • Now you’re ready to apply your temporary tattoo! Peel off the clear sheet, lay the tattoo facedown on your skin, and use a damp rag to wet the entire paper back. Then peel the paper off and the design is left behind!
  • Use makeup powder (personally I like the colorless powder so not to deaden the brilliance of the tattoo itself) and soften the shiny surface.
  • Go take pictures of your cosplay and have fun! It should last all day at a con (and then some!)~

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My Gravity Falls POPs came in!

Look, Dipper, it’s you! That’s @doubtingsalmon‘s amazing artwork!

And there’s you, Mabel! The frame even matches your sweater! ₍՞◌′ᵕ‵ू◌₎♡

Bill seems to be admiring my Bill Table with his big ol’ eye.

But where’s Grunkle Stan?

Ah, trying to hang with/ the mystical alien ladies. I should’ve guessed! 

Kinda bummed I didn’t get the Chase Varient of Bill (it would’ve gone really well with my room, given the space paintings I have) but I love them all so it was totally worth the wait! They’re weirdly cute!


A very long time ago when I used to regularly make fakemon I often got the question as to how I came up with them. At the time I didn’t really have a good coherent answer nor the English vocabulary to actually elaborate how so I decided to do something special and create a design notes image submission to go alongside the actual starters.

So yeah the first thing I do when I come with any creature design is basically creating a synopsis in my head for it. For these Pokemon it was: starters Pokemon you could find in the Canadian province of Prince Edward Island. Starter Pokemon usually a grass type based on an extinct animal, a fire type based on one of the signs of the Chinese Zodiac and a water type based on a amphibious animal.

From there I kinda brainstorm what could fit those niches and came up with Dimetrodon, Holstein Friesian cattle and a North American beaver. Furthermore most Pokemon are animal with a twist so in this case I tried to apply their elemental types into the designs themselves. Frondon and Beablet have that elemental type around the unique feature of their species though Taurch was a based on the fact cows use their tail to swat away bugs (therefore bug types, which are weak to fire, would be afraid of a flaming tail to be sure). In addition Taurch also is based on a minotaur in addition to being based on a type of domestic cattle which explains some of its design choices. Also I gave Frondon some mammal like features actual dimetrodons likely didn’t have (like erect ears and a deer like nose) to make the fact its based on a synapsid more obvious as I had some concerns people would think its a stegosaurus lol.

From there I put their general shape (often called a silhouette) onto paper and tweaked the designs until they felt like Pokemon. That’s definitely a thing you can’t teach easy but its mostly just learning to balance markings. Beablet is about as complex as you want to push it.

As a last point don’t be afraid to based a fakemon on a creature that already has a Pokemon based on it. As fun as it is to try to come up with designs based on obscure creatures that haven’t got a official design based on them yet that can lead to you trying to force the design. That can definitely lead  to designs that just look off. The world will not mourn too heavily seeing another cat Pokemon I promise you, if that’s what your mind wants to make go for it!

Christmas with Seventeen
  • you’ve been friends with Seventeen for quite a while and are by no means a rare guest at the dorm
  • however, you visit the dorm even more frequently towards Christmas, and the closer it gets, the more of a chaos the place is
  • in early December, you’d walk in to everyone running around, some members carrying boxes with decorations and some just looking plain lost
  • Soonyoung would greet you by the door and while you’re bent to take your shoes off, he’d put a Christmas hat on you
  • “Merry Christmas!”
  • “…It’s December 3rd, but sure, Merry Christmas!”
  • he’d be grinning from ear to ear, wearing a similar hat himself as well as a Santa’s jacket you had seen lying around for forever
  • Seokmin would be walking by with a box of Christmas lights and almost drop the box when he sees you and immediately gets excited
  • all you could do is hope you don’t make the chaos any worse than it already is
  • Chan’s favorite Christmas decorations happen to be very glittery, so when you join a handful of the members by a fake Christmas tree, you see the floor partially covered in red and green glitter already
  • Mingyu’s eyes are moving between the glitter and Chan, who’s happily putting the decorations on the tree, and he’s pouting 
  • he’d still help the youngest one put the decorations on the tree, though, even though he’s grumbling under his breath
  • meanwhile, Seungcheol, Hansol and Joshua are going through the box of Christmas tree decorations
  • Joshua looks at some distastefully and asks how old some of them are, seeing as they’re more or less broken
  • “Oh wow, they must be old. They were already here when I started training.”
  • Joshua stares at Seungcheol and licks his lips slowly, too appalled to say anything, and the whole scene almost distracts you from straightening the few branches of the tree that were still pointing upwards
  • “Can we please throw them away and get some new ones?”
  • Seungcheol would try to stutter something about sentimental value, while Hansol’s motioning Joshua that it’s more than okay and that he shouldn’t mind the eldest membet
  • you giggle to yourself, which makes Mingyu raise his eyebrow while grinning, and Chan continues humming Jingle Bells quietly
  • once you’re done with the branches, you move to another room and see Jeonghan, Wonwoo and Jun putting up Christmas lights
  • “Oh, Y/N, could you give me that packet?”
  • you’d follow Wonwoo’s slender finger pointing at a box and get what he was pointing at, a set of pink star-shaped lights
  • “They look pretty.”
  • Wonwoo smiles when he gets the lights from you, and he nods
  • Jun snickers: “We got them because Wonwoo wanted to finish our set of differently colored lights.”
  • when you look around, you see that indeed, there’s practically every color of rainbow and more, and it’s not even all of them
  • Jeonghan finishes putting up the lights he’s been working on and sits down on the chair he had stood on, letting out a heavy sigh
  • “Tired?”
  • “A little. This is really exhausting.”
  • Wonwoo and Jun both turn to look at the oldest of the three
  • “Hyung, you’ve only put up that one set of lights, while we’ve done everything else.”
  • Jeonghan grumbles. “Doesn’t make it any less exhausting.”
  • shaking your head, you’d once again go to a different room and walk in on Minghao diligently putting some Christmas decorations on the wall, Seungkwan singing while mostly just passing decorations from a big box to Minghao, and Jihoon creating an artistic masterpiece on one of the walls at least by the looks of it
  • and Seokmin and Soonyoung fooling around in their Christmas costumes, the latter one by now wearing a full Santa Claus outfit while Seokmin is in a reindeer onesie
  • “Could you two do something?” Seungkwan sighs
  • it’s obvious that he’d like to join the two, though
  • Minghao rolls his eyes and mumbles something to himself while planting another paper silhouette of a Christmas tree on the wall
  • “Do something yourself, first.”
  • Seungkwan throws a grinning Soonyoung a glare
  • “I am, I’m helping Minghao.”
  • the mentioned male looks at the box that’s actually in his reach
  • “…Seungkwan, I kind of don’t need this kind of help.”
  • Seungkwan huffs while Jihoon chuckles to himself and says “I told you so.”
  • when you visit the dorm a bit closer to Christmas, you’re greeted by the delicious smell of freshly baked gingerbread cookies and Minghao’s exasperated voice in the kitchen, “Mingyu, that’s not how you do it!”
  • the members would be clearly divided into two groups - around half are decorating and the rest still making new ones
  • when you ask why there are so many cookies, all eyes turned to Mingyu, who has apparently made the dough, and hadn’t quite realized how much it would make
  • on the bright side, Seungkwan suggests they give them out to everyone else in the company, and everyone immediately agrees
  • you get to decorate a few cookies of your own, which the members find utterly fascinating, which in turn makes you feel so nervous that you purposely mess it up and laugh at it
  • most of the others gasp, but Jihoon joins you in laughing
  • a mere day before Christmas, you visit the dorm with two bags of presents - you had gotten each member a little something off their wishlists (whether they knew they had one or not)
  • upon seeing the presents, you see quite a few wide pairs of eyes
  • in Chan’s case, his eyes would be wide because he wasn’t particularly expecting to get anything from you
  • while in Seokmin’s case, he’d realize that he hasn’t gotten anyone anything
  • Seungkwan notices Seokmin’s expression and follows his gaze to your bags when you say hi to him
  • “Seokmin, did you forget to go Christmas shopping?”
  • “…Maybe.”
  • "Wasn’t it you who kept turning down all of our invitations to go Christmas shopping because you ‘had already got it covered’?”
  • Seokmin remains silent as he nods and scratches the back of his neck, and a few seconds later he’s grabbing his wallet and dashing to the door, putting his shoes and coat on and announcing that he’s leaving
  • shaking your head, you take your bags to the Christmas tree, which practically all of the members are gathered around, some joking and some (Jeonghan) just lying on the floor
  • everyone looks delighted to see you and the presents, and you’re surprised yet extremely happy to see all the presents in varying sizes saying “Y/N”
  • Soonyoung loudly announces that the biggest one is from him
  • Seungcheol laughs and says that the one with a funny ribbon is from him
  • and it’s honestly really interesting and sweet to see just how different all 12 presents were - it was clear that they had all wrapped them on their own
  • they also invite you over for Christmas, which is an invitation you can’t turn down
  • when you arrive that special day, the only light in the whole big dorm is from Christmas lights on the walls and near the windows, and the brightly shining Christmas tree
  • upon hearing you knock on the door, Hansol and Joshua come to the door and open it for you, both clad in red shirts with Christmas hats on their heads
  • “Merry Christmas, Y/N! Come on in.”
  • be sure you get to hear “Merry Christmas” from all of them
  • you have a small party in the living room where the Christmas tree is located, too, as well as a big table with snacks and drinks
  • there’s music playing and Jihoon’s dancing a little, and there’s not a single member who doesn’t have a smile on their faces
  • Jun would bring you a Christmas hat and you’d be a bit taken aback by his fitted red button-down, but you try to show none of it
  • Minghao would notice that and laugh, while Jun just smirks and pats your shoulder
  • Jihoon pulls you aside for a bit and tells you how much he appreciates your friendship with the group and by the end of it you’re so mushy that you hug him
  • you can imagine his face at that, but he hugs you back nevertheless while smiling widely
  • it gets later and you’re all talking together, gathered in a half moon circle by the Christmas tree, and soon start opening the presents
  • with 13 members and you, most of the presents hadn’t even fit under the tree, so you’re just getting them from all over the place
  • the opening is a lot of fun - some members had barely tried with the presents, and some overdid themselves
  • Seungcheol’s presents to everyone were more or less things he had “borrowed” from them and forgot to return
  • Mingyu would’ve gotten everyone something they didn’t know they needed (but which they did), and Wonwoo would’ve stuck to everyone’s wishlists
  • everything that Chan gets makes him very excited and it makes all of you really soft
  • when all the presents are open, you all stand up and one of the biggest group hugs you’ve ever been a part of ensues, with you eventually being in the middle as you’re hugged by all 13 members
  • you’re all laughing as you wish each other merry Christmas one more time in unison

Admin Scooter

A Paper Towns movie art print I did, using Cara Delevingne’s silhouette for Margo. The extract from the book that inspired it is here. Will put this in the Etsy shop if anyone would like one.


Equals45 by Peter Rea
Via Flickr:

A Waltz Among the Stars

Pairing: John/Paul

Rating: PG-13

Word Count: 2,624

Set In: Paris, 1961

Prompt: “Dance with me.”

A/N: i used ‘unchained melody’ by the righteous brothers as the song they listen to on the radio. the song wasn’t released by them until 1965 but the police can’t stop me.

Whoa, my love
My darling
I’ve hungered for your touch
A long, lonely time

His eyes flickered toward the man on the balcony after hearing the first few words of the song float quietly from the speakers of the radio. He stood outside smoking, a hazy white cloud of smoke left his unseen lips, as his back was towards him. John sat on the bed, back pressed up against the gaudy floral wallpaper and knees pulled halfway up towards his chest, creating a makeshift desk for the notebook he held so near and dear to him. On the tattered paper was Paul’s dim silhouette, shaded by the moon that he now faced, which shone only partly behind the red brick building next to their hotel. John made sure to only include the full moon and the starry night surrounding him, wanting to remember only the sheer beauty he was trying to so delicately capture with the short, black pencil in his hand. His legs were crossed as he leaned casually against the rusted railing on his elbows, occasionally lifting up an exposed arm to take a short drag from the cigarette placed daintily between his fingers. He’d captured the slight curve of his petite waist, which was tucked snugly under the black trousers that seemed to hug every bit of his legs in just the right way. His shoulders were pulled back, relaxed as he took another puff. John could imagine the small cloud of smoke leaving his lips in a way that seemed almost sensual, his plump mouth parting in a perfect ‘o’ shape to release the puff into the atmosphere. The man in front of him moved so that his hip curved to the opposite side to shift his weight onto his right foot. His cigarette dangled between between his two fingers, which were relaxed hanging over the railing. The gentle breeze had seemingly picked up a bit, as the hair springing from the top of his head curled with the wind. John found his heart bursting at the sight, completely mesmerised at the very shape of his body in the silvery glow of the moonlight.

Are you still mine?

Pushing himself off of the painfully squeaky bed, John followed the glowing stripes of light along the carpeted floor and padded over towards the opened door. His sock-covered toes were icy​, as the yearly October chill was beginning to set in even in Paris. The music drifting from inside the hotel room was slightly more faint now as he reached a hand out to tug at Paul’s hairy arm, making him turn around and face him with a sleepy smile, knowing. Stamping out his cigarette under his shoe, he followed John inside, kicking them off his feet and tossing them somewhere into the shadows. They stood apart for a moment, studying the other with dreamy gazes, both men taking in the sight of the other. Paul’s raven black hair was combed down in their newest hairstyle they’d gotten in Hamburg, but it was ruffled by the ever-persistent autumn wind. John’s wide eyes fell to the shape of his bowed lips, the thought of how maddeningly soft they always felt whenever they grazed his skin overwhelming his mind to the point that he nearly couldn’t think straight for the time being. His eyebrows were arched high as usual, and his eyes–Jesus Christ, his eyes–were wider than normal, but still possessed that warm, kind quality that nearly always drove John over the edge. The man singing on the radio sang louder in the background, the music flooding their ears and their senses as Paul crept towards John, bare feet brushing against the curls of the thin carpeting.

I need your love
I need your love
God speed your love to me

They met in the center of the small room, the tranquil atmosphere slowing their raging heartbeats down to a steady rhythmic thump as the tips of their fingers grazed together at their sides between them. Their fingers tangled together almost out of instinct, being so used to the feeling of the other. Paul’s thumb on each hand stroked over his knuckles excruciatingly slowly, as if he wanted to even dissolve into John. He was taken aback when Paul lifted one of them to his soft mouth and touched his knuckles to his lips, nudging the ball of his nose into the same spot before kissing there again. John had nearly melted into a puddle at this point, and he was shocked that he was even still standing at the sheer happiness that had overcame him. “You have the most exquisite hands,” Paul muttered lowly into his fingers, touching his warm lips to them again before bringing them to rest between them once more. John’s gaze flickered down to the palms sliding delicately up the sides of his arms, losing sight of them whenever they smoothed over the thin, white material of his shirt covering his shoulders, and cupped either side of his neck. Paul seemed to be gleaming, a heavenly sort of halo shaping his frame, eyes as radiant as the glow of the stars behind him. John’s fingers crept over the small swell of his hips before settling them to hold his waist tenderly, being gentle as if he were an expensive piece of fine china. Their hips began to sway leisurely to the slow tempo of the triplets in the beat. Although they both knew that there would be plenty more moments just like this in the future, a pang of sadness found its way into John’s chest from deep down. He knew that they were genuinely happy, content and at ease with their relationship, cheerful kisses and tender moments that they’d shared would always be remembered and cherished. But the fact that they couldn’t fully share their immense love for each other with anyone was almost painful in a way. Why something so basic as loving another human being was frowned upon was completely beyond him. Someday in the very very distant future, he could even picture them still together, rings exchanged and vows repeated sometime still far off. He’d never admitted it to Paul, as he was deeply troubled by his silly thoughts and dreams of an uncertain future. Hopefully, he thought, England will lose the stick that had been evidently shoved up its tight arse and come to realize how incredibly ridiculous its law was. Drooping eyes brought him out of his thoughts, Paul staring intently, wanting desperately to know what had been going through the man’s mind. The moment seemed surreal again, like they were both in the middle of some incredibly lovely dream that you’d never want to wake up from. The light breeze snuck past the doorway to the balcony to whisper in their ears and wisp through the straying strands of hair.

Lonely rivers flow to the sea, to the sea
To the open arms of the sea

Paul leaned forward the slightest bit so that the curves of their cheeks would brush past each other, the tiny bit of stubble that had broken out on John feeling scratchy against Paul’s porcelain skin. Their feet swept them in slow circles around the carpet, swinging cautiously, as either man was equally nervous about accidentally tramping on the other’s toes. John savored the feeling of Paul’s cool breath ghosting over his neck and falling down the loose collar of his shirt, making him close his eyes and shiver against the other man. He could hear a soft giggle erupt from Paul’s plump lips as he slid an unhurried hand from the back of John’s neck upwards to rest where the man’s hair was longer and thicker. His fingers ran through the auburn locks at a slow pace, causing John to only pull their chests closer together. His eyes involuntarily shut once again, wanting nothing more than to feel only his best mate, lover, pressed up so tightly against him. It was moments like these that John continued on for. He knew that there was no one else on the face of this wretched planet–not even Cyn, as terrible as it sounded even in his own head–that he’d want in Paul’s place. Loving Paul was something else, something almost indescribable. It was like the feeling you get when you finally find that missing piece to the puzzle you’ve been working on all week, like watching the moon transition into the rising sun in the wee hours of the morning, like the clouds opening up and rays of sunshine lighting their way through the open part, all that sappy shit. Although it’s similar to all of those things, nothing could match the jelly-like feeling in the pit of his stomach when Paul did so much as glance at him. And when he touched him–dear God–it felt almost as if universes were colliding and the stars were glimmering brighter than they ever have in all of time, like an eternal euphoria. John was once again brought back to reality by the strangely distant sound of the man on the radio crooning in the corner. The hands John had placed chastely on Paul’s waist wove around to the small of his back and played with the hem of his trousers, tugging upwards lightly with his thumbs wrapped around the unused belt loops. Paul hummed appreciatively in his ear and placed an excruciatingly gentle kiss on his jawline.

Whoa, my love
My darling
I’ve hungered, hungered for your touch
A long, lonely time

Nudging his angled nose into the warmth of Paul’s neck, John shut his eyes and just listened; listened to the serene music that had gradually gotten louder to reach its climax, to the almost unnoticeable sputtering of an engine starting somewhere in the dark street below. None of that mattered to him, as John was focusing himself intently on the pleasant hum of Paul’s breathing in his ear. His mind wandered momentarily, John silently not believing how the hell he managed to turn so incredibly soft so fast for James Paul McCartney. The thought only made him pull the man impossibly closer to him, wanting nothing more than for Paul to just melt into him so that they could stay like this until the end of time.

I need your love
I need your love
God speed your love to me

The final strong chord of the song rang out in the otherwise quiet room until the radio went completely silent, as the program probably ended since it was growing late. The little room suddenly grew dark and desolate in the new silence that hung over them, other than the light breeze that was still nipping at their exposed necks. The swaying of their hips back and forth never ceased, as either man silently wished that they could stay wrapped up like this in the comfort of the other’s warm embrace for all eternity. Paul made up for the loss of music and began to hum a soft, unrecognizable tune in John’s ear, fingers still combing through the roots of his hair in earnest. The moon shone bright through the still open doorway and cast their tall shadow against the carpet, which John had just noticed now. He made a mental note, telling himself that he’d someday have to sketch out this scene for him and Paul to cherish. John could picture them from another angle, wrapped up in the tangle of their warm limbs, hearts thrumming together in a calm, steady rhythm, their heads side by side and occasionally bumping against each other in time with their loose hips. He couldn’t help but smile at the image that he held in his mind.

It had to be at least ten minutes after the song had initially ended that Paul, much to John’s displeasure, stopped humming into the shell of his ear. His hips ceased all movement, as did John’s after he realized that he’d suddenly stopped, and they stood there in the silence of the clear night, encased in their little bubble and closed off from the rest of the hectic world. Neither man moved for a moment, holding one another in their tight embrace, basking in the moonlight and the cool midnight air drifting into their room. John had that certain feeling in the pit of his stomach, that almost indefinable surge of intense emotion that he felt nearly everytime he was around him.

He pulled away from Paul’s head so that he was merely centimeters away from the rounded tip of his nose. Paul’s eyes gave him a sense of relaxation, the notion that the stars were aligned and that everything was alright in the world. But God, was he stunning, silky dark hair feathered off to the side from the wind, chestnut eyes tired and drooping as they were before, and John couldn’t help himself even if he tried. So he kissed him, almond eyes immediately fluttering closed at the feeling of Paul’s warm lips finally covering his thin ones like a cozy blanket. In a flurry of soft kisses and tiny, almost held back whimpers, their shirts were pulled over their heads before landing with a squeaky thump on the mattress, and, well–you know the rest.

Paul awoke the next morning to the sound of a very persistent car horn outside, much to his annoyance. Grumbling, he rose from his spot against the wall on the tiny twin-sized bed and rubbed his sleep-coated eyes, realizing that John’s naked form was no longer curled up next to him in a deep slumber. Other than him, the bed was empty, the sun streaming through the door to the balcony that neither bothered to close. Smirking, he thought of the show that they must have given the apartment with the large window across the street the night before, and threw his bare legs over the side of the bed.

John was nowhere to be found as the man peered around the small room. He noticed a small folded paper on the nightstand that read 'My Dearest Paulie,’ in John’s signature scrawly hand. Unfolding it, his heart was bursting, as the paper had unnoticeably been two separate drawings. The first one was a portrait of his darkened silhouette against the moonlight, and he wondered, blushing, how John had managed to make his behind look so good. The other was completely different, showing their two figures tangled together, swaying to the gentle beat of that wonderful song that had played on the radio the night before. It was adorable, as John had even scribbled little music notes drifting from the nearby radio. At the bottom of the paper read 'Kiss me 'til the night runs out,’ in his scratched handwriting. Paul ran his fingers over the line delicately in awe, careful not to smear anything. Heart swelling, he held both portraits close to his bare chest and smiled goofily, feeling as giddy as an innocent schoolgirl who’s just been kissed for the very first time. And when John returned, the mischievous grin on his face even wider than usual, Paul ravished him, touching and kissing and taking all that the other would offer. They danced every night after that, swirling around in their modest little hotel room in the heart of the city of love itself, silently swaying and whispering sweet nothings into the welcoming darkness.