paper is not dead

"You think this is a joke"

The band director at my school is one f the craziest/ best teachers I’ve ever had. Two years ago we were playing a piece and we kept on messing up and kids were laughing and my teacher was just done with our shit. While we were playing the piece his teacher assistant was organizing papers and there were stacks of papers on the piano. When my teacher got pushed over the edge he yelled for everyone to stop playing. He then swiped all of the papers off the tables, and the room was DEAD ASS SILENT. Then some asshole kid started to giggle and my teacher screamed “DO YOU THINK THIS IS A JOKE? DO YOU THINK THIS IS A GAME? THIS IS BAND CLASS!” Then he told us to pack up and to get out of his band room. Then we all got to lunch early. This teacher also carries around a nerf gun, and his hall pass is a piece of a broken drum. He also lets us play fun stuff like Phantom of the Opera, Star Wars, Harry Potter, and High School Musical. So he’s pretty cool.

anonymous asked:

Top 10 jokes that have made people cringe/groan/sigh/laugh painfully?

1: What did the conductor say when he found his music?
Score!
2: How many conductors does it take to change a lightbulb?
Don’t know, nobody was watching.
3: What’s better than a trombone at the bottom of the ocean?
2 trombones at the bottom of the ocean.
4: What’s the difference between a trombone and a chainsaw?
Vibrato.
5: How do you make a trumpet sound like a trombone?
Lose all sense of style and play all the wrong notes.
6: How do you slow down a trombonist?
Put a piece of paper on his stand.
7: How do you stop a trombonist?
Put notes on the paper.
8: Whats the difference between a dead trombonist on the road and a dead squirrel on the road?
The squirrel might’ve had a job.
9: how many trombones does it take to change a lightbulb?
2, one to do it and one to say he should’ve used a different position
10: Knock knock
Who’s there
The trombonist
The trombonist who?
The trombonist that’s delivering your pizza

Monday 8:27am
I woke up with you on my mind.
You called me babe last night —
my heart is still pounding.

Tuesday 10:53pm
Today I realized we won’t work.
What we are is hurting her.
And I think she matters more to me than you do.

Wednesday 11:52pm
I broke things off with you today.
She barely said a word.
I’ve never regretted anything more than this.

Thursday 4:03pm
I shouldn’t have sent that message.
You shouldn’t have been so okay with receiving it.

Friday 9:57pm
I almost messaged you today.
I didn’t.

Saturday 8:49pm
I’m walking around town in search of alcohol.
They say that liquor numbs the pain of having a broken heart.
I want to put that to the test.

Sunday 2:32am
I heard you texted a girl you’ve never spoken to before.
I wonder if it’s because you’re trying to replace me.
I can’t help but wish you weren’t.
I thought I was irreplaceable.

—  a week with you on my mind, c.j.n.
Move on, leave, run away, escape this place… but don’t forget about me, about us, about this town. Always remember where you come from so you can appreciate how far you’ve come.
—  c.j.n.