Confession #2,410

Maybe this isn’t really a spoonie thing and I’m just making it up? But I had a sensitive tooth that had to get repaired at the dentist last week. He said it would be sensitive for about a week and to come back if it wasn’t better. Well, not only is that tooth still sensitive, but a bunch of my other teeth that were fine before the dentist visit (which involved 2 huge needles that nearly caused a panic attack) are now sensitive. :(

Having anxiety isn’t just feeling anxious, it’s caring so much of what others think that you live in constant fear. It keeps your mind racing on small things that aren’t even a big deal. It is a battle against you and your caring mind.

Valentine's Day HC

This is my Valentine’s Day present for @sleepingupsidedown blame her for the suffering

-Lance has everyone’s back

-Even if no one ever really talks to him but Hunk

-Keith goes to Allura or Shiro because god forbid he talks to anyone else

-Allura goes to Coran and Coran goes to Allura

-Shiro only goes to Keith

-Pidge goes to Hunk or Shiro

-Hunk can talk to Pidge, Keith, Lance , and Shay

-Lance well, when it comes to the real important stuff, the homesickness, feeling inferior, a burden, a seventh wheel, Lance has no one

-Lance tries to form close bonds with the others but they never give him the chance, and those that do he doesn’t want to hurt by telling them of how unhappy he is

-Or he feels the horrible tension that seems to constantly be around them so he takes it upon himself to be the comedy relief

-The reason he flirts is because it makes him feel closer to his brother who taught him all those awful pick up lines

-He’s used to being overlooked it happens when you have a big family, it can’t be helped

-So when they finally have a moment to stop and relax Lance isn’t all that bothered that everyone naturally paired off only leaving him alone

-Lance then decides to simply go to his room, have some me time

-When he finally has his mask on he finds that he has tracks down his face mask(HIS VERY EXPENSIVE AND RARE FACEMASK MIND YOU)

- Cursing he realized it was wet with his tears

- He rushed to fix the mask and try to stop his crying but he finds that he can’t

-He can’t stop crying

-He can’t breathe

-He can’t hear the music he put on earlier

-He’s on the floor

-He doesn’t know what’s wrong and yet he remains quiet, rides it out by himself because who can he tell

-So he waits for what feels like forever to be able to breathe again

-Then he just waits for the panic and blind terror to subside

-And when it’s all over he gets up, the timer went off, it’s time to take off the face mask

-He doesn’t want to be alone anymore

-He doesn’t want to be there

-He wants to be in his mama’s arms

-He wants to listens to his siblings trying to make him laugh

-He wants his dad to be making him chocolate caliente

-Hell he just wants someone to talk to

-He just wants someone in the spaceship to have his back for once

-Someone who is genuinely interested to see him or just listen to everything be it good or bad

-He wants too many things that will never come to pass

-So instead he lays back in bed until the next battle because what else is there to do?

-What Lance doesn’t know is that it’s his birthday

-Everyone went and paired up to go prepare the surprise party for Lance the flirt who just happened to be born on Valentine’s Day

-Hunk went to go make the cake with Coran

-Pidge went to find some dank memes

-Allura,Shiro, and Keith went on to decorate the common space

-What Lance doesn’t know is that they all love him and appreciate him

-What Lance doesn’t know is that Keith planned all of this after Hunk let it slip that Lance’s birthday is on Valentine’s Day

-What Lance doesn’t know is that Keith plans to tell him how he feels about him

-WHAT LANCE DOESN’T KNOW is that the reason no one has had time is because they have been busy trying to hunt down the beauty products the know Lance loves or anything that brings him happiness to be honest

-You see Hunk isn’t making an Altean cake, oh no, he managed to find more than half of the ingredients to make Lance’s favorite cake, a tres leches

-Pidge found at least 3 new face mask made by humans for humans

-Allura is giving Lance a book she’s been writing with all the pick up lines Lance has ever directed toward her because she doesn’t know when but at some point it stopped being annoying and it started to be endearing

-Shiro is giving Lance the chance to give himself a nickname that Shiro will use from then on but it must be appropriate

-And Keith….. he has a whole letter were he wrote down all the feelings he knows he won’t be able to ever say to him

-Just hundreds of words stating how much he loves him and how sorry he is for ever forgetting him

-Asking Lance if he will take him, God please allow him to have a special place in his heart

-So Lance doesn’t know that when he is finally feeling as if he can actually maybe function that the others have Hunk going to his door to coax him out of his room

-But when Lance learns about all of it, learns that he’s not alone and the others have his back

-Now his tears are from happiness and a spark of hope that not everything is impossible

-And yes he does have enough space for Keith, why wouldn’t he?

Altean broom closet

((CLAUSTRAPHOBIC LANCE fic under the cut with some Klangst and some cuddling))

He doesn’t remember what the fight is about, but he knows it’s petty. Something stupid that they both blew out of proportion.

“Do you ever just shut up!?” Keith yells, bringing a hand up to the bridge of his nose.

Lance folded his arms, “Do you ever stop saying stupid shit!?” he mocked, getting into Keith’s face with an angry step forward.

Keep reading

My lungs tighten
My air way closes
The room starts to spin
My heart is going out of control
Deep breath in and out
It’s not helping,
I run outside.
I let the fresh air blow across my face
“Focus on the pretty trees”
“The pretty sky”
“It’s a beautiful day” I tell myself.
My breathing evens out
My lungs relax
My air way opens
And my heart slows
“You’re okay.” I whisper
“You’re okay.”
—  Chapters from my life

So been awhile, it got bad, than worse now it seems to be settling down… for now. My sleep is completely fucked. I am up till 5 and 6am, sleeping on and off till like 5pm. Im restless, stressed. No one seems to notice. I am so nervous and scared all day long. I crave to be alone in my room. Cold and dark, light and sound just are too much lately. Between my panic and migrine it’s too much. Ugh. All I do is question life. Why am I like this? Why am I here? Why do I see the way I see? Why do I think the way I do? What’s the point? Why are some people okay and others not. I was “normal” once why can’t I go back? My soul is sleepy.

akumapheles  asked:

(to teddy) I'm sorry to ask, but do you have werewolf genes in addition to being a metamorphmagus?

Andromeda: He doesn’t. Though sometimes Teddy gets…confused. Who he really is. He has those, how would you call them - panic attacks? He starts…transforming, uncontrollably, into the things he fears most. Like, for instance, a werewolf.

Teddy: No…no-no-no, not this again-

Teddy: …someone…anyone-

Andromeda: And at times like these, Teddy just needs a little bit of reminding…of who he really is.