pam-and-jim

real-housewife-of-berk asked:

Have you seen those walkie-talkies? There's one with a picture of Rey and one with Kylo? Imagine them carrying out a secret relationship from lightyears away just communicating with those plastic walkie-talkies.

Originally posted by whataboutourlifes

Oh my god. 

“Who’re you talking to?” Hux growled as Kylo shifted the device behind his back. 

“No one,” he assured the ginger, glad for his mask that kept the general from seeing his smile. 

“I swore I just heard a voice.”

“You’re just now admitting to it? Shocking. I was going to give you a few more years of doubt before I believed you’d say you were hearing things.” 

Hux’s face purpled, eyes narrowing, not knowing that Kylo had held the button down to talk the whole time. Without another word, the general turned on his heel and stomped back in the direction he’d come from, nearly out of earshot before: “And your hair looks stupid too, you nerf-herder!” 

Excuse me while I die of laughter. This is great. 

“Four years ago I was just a guy who had a crush on a girl who had a boyfriend. And I had to do the hardest thing I ever had to do, which was just to wait. Don’t get me wrong I flirted with her. Pam, I can now admit in front of friends and family that I do know how to make a photocopy. I didn’t need your help that many times. And do you remember how long it took you to teach me to drive stick? (Pam: Like a year). I’ve been driving stick since high school. For a really long time that’s all I had. Little moments with a girl who saw me as a friend. And a lot of people told me I was crazy to wait this long for a date with a girl who I worked with, but I think, even then I knew, I was waiting for my wife.”

…my husband will be a Jim Halpert.