p:ziam

anonymous asked:

So I've read many posts and treatises that claim Zayn pined unrequitedly for Liam in the beginning of their relationship until Liam "figured it out," but I swear when I watch fetus footage of them (and I've watched A LOT) it sure looks like Liam was giving as good as he got, right from the start. What do you think, voice of Ziam reason?

hiiii!

I am completely flattered that you’ve stopped in my corner of the Tumblr webs!

 So I actually don’t buy the fandom lore that Liam was unaware as Zayn pined unrequitedly, listening to Dashboard Confessional and writing emo lyrics in his LiveJournal and wistfully looking at that photo of Liam with his top off from the 1D book that he loved:

I think they have a really beautiful friendship and seem to wholly understand each other in a rare way most people don’t. 

That said, a hoe knows another hoe, and I fully believe Liam employed the use of hoe tricks in the early days (and thereafter, but for the sake of this post not being 812 pages long, we’ll keep to the early days).

 Liam plotted and planned and giggled and shrugged.  Liam set out a lure and waited for poor, thirsty Pokemon Zayn to come to him  (he wanted to throw balls at him -  AMIRIGHT GUYS? GET IT?). 

*clears throat* Ok. I’m done now. Where was I? Ah yes!

Liam Payne’s Hoe Tricks Masterclass

Lesson 1: Seize Hoepportunities

Some say that local dogs as far as 100 miles away could hear Zayn’s internal screaming that day. 

I BET HE IS, LIMOTHY. I BET. 

That was totally a premeditated ass grab. 

Lesson 2: Play Coy

Liam J. Payne, with his innocent lamb face and patented Giggle Shrug™ knows how to play coy with a sharpness and cunning not to be messed with. Behold a master in his element, a Leonardo HoeVinci. 

There’s no scientific evidence to support my case, but I would put down my hard earned tuppence that Liam has used the Elle Woods  “Bend & Snap”. 

Liam is employing a hoe trick that has been used by masterful hoes for centuries: the lap squirm, a hoe trick that Liam would use dozens and dozens of times through Ziam history. 

Zayn, being pummeled by the waves of his own thirst, helpless against Liam’s masterful hoe tricks. 

Lesson 3: Go Big or Go Ho(e)me

In short, I fully believe that Liam knew exactly what he was doing. Liam Payne is not just top notch entertainer, a talented songwriter, and good human being. Liam is also a Masterful Hoe. 

vine

I can’t 😊🔫

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Okay so...

This is one of my favorite Ziam moments:

The fact that they even kept this in the video is still surprising to me. Anyway, what I love about it is how nonchalant it is; Zayn looks perfectly content to have Liam on his lap and is untroubled even when Liam starts acting silly for the camera. It just looks like an every day thing. 

However, what made this moment better/worse for me was when I saw this:

It is clearly from the same day/place (SNL) though I don’t know if this was before or after the previous gif. Once again Liam is being silly for the camera while Zayn could care less (talking or warming up) in the background. From this moment we can see that there is a TV on the wall. 

Now looking back at this moment:

I used to not be sure if Zayn was talking to someone out of frame but now I’m fairly certain he was just watching TV. Though its quick, it also looks like Liam’s head is tilted up in the direction of the screen before he turns to the camera. So…they were just casually sitting like this while watching TV. Pardon my language but that is some cute domestic shit. 

I don’t know why I love it but I do. 

*not my gifs

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honestly the funniest shit you’ll see all day