p:merthur

The real implications of Arthur never knowing

One of the funniest/saddest/most interesting things about the Merthur relationship is that Arthur has no idea how unequal it is. Like it’s easy to get mad at him because we see all that Merlin’s done and sacrificed, but Arthur doesn’t. From his point of view he and Merlin have a fairly equitable arrangement going.

Sure, Arthur sometimes abuses his position of power in petty ways, and that’s not great, but he also lets Merlin get away with pretty much whatever. He lets Merlin talk back to him both in private and in front of people, which is a huge deal. Arthur is the king/crown prince, and he lets his servant disrespect him in public. He lets Merlin disappear to the tavern, sometimes for days, without any real punishment other than some yelling and some unpleasant chores he would have had to do anyway. From Arthur’s point of view, Merlin puts up with his bad behavior and in return, Arthur puts up with Merlin’s.

Arthur knows that Merlin has protected him and remained loyal to him far past anything that could be expected of a servant, but Arthur has also protected Merlin past what could be expected from an employer. He’s committed treason for Merlin, risked his life for Merlin, risked war to plead for Merlin’s life. Again, Arthur doesn’t know the lengths that Merlin has had to go to, doesn’t know how much he’s given and sacrificed without recognition or reward. He doesn’t know that Merlin is risking himself every day that he stays in Camelot. He only knows that they’re friends (even if he wouldn’t always admit it) so of course they’ll protect each other when they can.

Arthur also doesn’t know that Merlin can’t leave. He doesn’t know that Merlin is basically trapped by destiny and under a huge amount of pressure to take anything Arthur dishes out at him. Servants aren’t slaves. They can quit. Most of them don’t really have many other options but Arthur has every reason to believe that Merlin does. Merlin could go work for Gaius full time, or just go home to Ealdor if he was ever really unhappy. Except no, he can’t, because then he’d be failing all of Albion and also Arthur would die.

Merlin having magic and being Arthur’s destined protector changes everything about their friendship, makes it distinctly one sided and unfair, and makes every less than fantastic thing Arthur has ever done or said to Merlin about a million times worse and more abusive than Arthur ever intended. And he never gets a chance to make it right, to see his best friend as he really is and do something about it because the stupid writers never let him learn the stupid truth until he was dying.

Don’t you ever read too many fics and it all comes down when you’re gonna read the newest chapter of one of them and you’re like: “Wait, what the shit was going on? I can’t remember, was this the one where they’re already together or was that in another?”
And some other tiems you have to go and read a couple of chapters back because, lit, you can’t remember what the stroy was about.

Imagine Your OTP
  • Person A: Hey B, Knock knock
  • Person B: *sighs* Who's there?
  • Person A: Kiss
  • Person B: Kiss who?
  • Person A: Kiss me
  • Person B: Did you
  • Person B: Did you just confess to me via a knock knock joke
  • me, after watching 4 to 6 episodes of a new tv show / reading a new book: well fuck
  • me, after realising that i've discovered yet another fucking ship to dedicate my life to: ahh fuckity fuck

do you ever have a ship that you obsess over for a couple of weeks/ months /whatever and then slowly a new ship takes over and soon it becomes a year or 2 and many ships have come and gone, where each time you just enter a stage of intense dedication and obsession until one day, some new fandom material comes out from one of your old ships and you find yourself nostalgic so you just sweep Ao3 for a few fics and next minute you are in so deep through the ship’s Tumblr tag that you realise you are exactly where you were, 2 years ago, obsessing over the same ship, looking through the same tag, scrolling through the new fics and you think


wow


some things never change

Quotes while reading fanfic

*high pitched screaming*

*reads an embarrassing line and takes a deep breath* *shuts phone off* *takes five million laps around my house* *ignores fanfic but thinks about it for every second for three days straight**comes back to fanfic* “OhH mYy FuCKiNG gOD!!!”

“Why the fuck you lyin’ why you always lyin’, mmmm my god, stop fucking lyin’ ”

“bIITTTCHHHHH”

“This is straight up lies, this doesn’t ever happen”

“Oh my god this fic is terrible….I have to finish it as fast as I possibly can”

“wHat the FUCK THAT MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH TAG WAS NOT FUCKING THERE”

“….what the hell do you mean my ship doesn’t end up together? WHat THE heLl dO YOU MEaN?!”

“They’re like little tiny baby pancakes aweee”

“JUST DO IT ALREADY”

“Where’s the smut?”

“Oh my god there’s too much smut”

“I know this bitch just didn’t….”

“Oh shit am I about to cry? What the FUCK tears?”

“I probably shouldn’t be reading this in church”

Imagine Your OTP

Person A: When we get married, we need to serve mac and cheese because that’s what I want on the happiest day of my life 

Person B: Did you just say “When” ?!?!? 

Person A: Yeaaaaah…. 

Person B: Did you just propose while talking about mac and cheese? 

Person A: Why yes it looks like I did