p: wtnv

Your Star Sign As People Cecil Hates

Aries: Steve Carlsberg

Taurus: STEVE Carlsberg

Gemini: Steve CARLSBERG

Cancer: steve carlsberg

Leo: stevE CarlsberG

Virgo: StEvE cArLsBeRg

Libra: sTeVe CaRlSbErG

Vile, Vile, Scorpio: STEVE CARLSBERG

Sagittarius: Steve Carlsberg

Capricorn: Steve CarlsBerg

Aquarius: StevE CarlsberG


Welcome to Night Vale Questions
  • Cecil Palmer: What is your greatest passion in life?
  • Carlos: How do you like to express your love?
  • Dana Cardinal: What is the bravest thing you've ever done?
  • The Glow Cloud: What are your favorite colors?
  • Kevin: How would an evil version of yourself look?
  • Steve Carlsberg: What annoys you most about people?
  • Old Woman Josie: Do you get along with your grandparents?
  • The Erikas: Do you believe in some kind of higher power?
  • Hiram McDaniels: How would you spend one day as a dragon?
  • The Faceless Old Woman: What do you fear most?
  • Tamika Flynn: Are you a natural leader?
  • Earl Harlan: What do you most like to cook?
  • John Peters (You Know, the Farmer?): Are you more friendly or shy?
  • Apache Tracker: What in your past is most embarrassing to you?
  • The Man in the Tan Jacket: How well do you remember faces?
  • Strex Corp: Would you join the evil overlords or fight back?
  • Station Management: What's the worst job you ever had?
  • The Hooded Figures: Are you very secretive?
  • Mayor Pamela Winchell: What accomplishments are you most proud of?
  • Megan Wallaby: What is your favorite physical feature?
  • Marcus Vanston: What would you do with one million dollars?
  • Khoshekh: What are your pets named?

I kind of want Carlos’ many labcoats to turn out to be just one labcoat that sort of disobeys reality by altering itself to fit the occasion.

I also kind of want it to be heavily implied that Carlos received this labcoat as a graduation gift from his former elementary school teacher, Ms. Valerie Frizzle.


“Carlos, perfect and beautiful, came into our studios during the break earlier, but declined to stay for an interview. He had some sort of blinking box in his hand covered with wires and tubes. Said he was testing the place for materials. I don’t know what materials he meant, but that box sure whistled and beeped a lot.”


B O Y F R I E N D  M A T E R I A L

Night Vale Workout:

If you hear:
“Night vale/ citizens”- 5 push-ups
“Vague yet menacing government organization/ city council / strexcorp/ sheriffs secret police”- 5 sit ups
“Carlos”- jumping jacks until Cecil changes the subject
“Angels/ hooded figures/ anything about a god”- 5 tricep dips
An intern dies- run in place until you hear one of the other above keywords.