I was wondering if what I asked for was too much, but I only asked for dinner at Chuck E. Cheese. Was that really too much to ask? Apparently, my birthday was just cursed…It was legit cursed.
I didn’t even want to turn the TV on. My stomach was growling and yet my legs were too tired to even consider walking to the kitchen. I hugged the throwing pillow and laid my head on the armrest. I was tired, but I couldn’t sleep. Mainly because I was alone and it was dark.
I suddenly heard the doorbell and I figured it was Obito. I got up and forced my legs to drag my body towards the door to answer it.
“Happy birthday.” I felt this instant disappointment not seeing Obito, yet I felt this tingling feeling in my stomach seeing Naruto.
“How did you know?” I asked, I couldn’t even smile.
“Facebook of course!”
“I deleted my Facebook months ago,” I said. Naruto’s eyes widened before scratching the back of his head nervously.
“Really? Aah honestly, I saw you walk in my neighbourhood and you looked very sad. I told my dad and he was surprised because today is your birthday. I figured…I had to cheer you up. So…” He indicated to the pizza box in his hand. “It’s with extra cheese.”
“That is….So thoughtful…Why would you go to all that trouble?” I asked.
“Because…” He looked away from me for a moment before knitting his eyebrows. As if he was confused. “Because we are friends.” He gave me this kind smile. It almost seemed my body moved on its own. I wrapped my arms around his middle and just hid my face in his chest. He had probably no idea, how hurt I got throughout the day, that this gesture of kindness felt like some sort of salvation.
“Why is that so odd?” He laughed, using his free hand to pat my back. I let go of him and let him in. “Hey, why do you walk so funny?” He cocked his head as he closed the door behind him.
“I kinda walked for…Six entire hours before I managed to get home from the stripclub.”
“…Wait, what?” He gave me a strange look and I wanted to quickly explain myself, but starting off with Heaven and the cuffs was not a good idea. He ended up laughing when I mentioned it was all Izuna’s and Madara’s fault. I sat down exhaling exhausted.
“I was going to offer you something to drink, but….Due to the circumstances, I will just point where the kitchen is.” I said and he smiled.
“What do you have?” He asked as he returned with a bottle of Bacardi.
“Hey, remember this?” He laughed and I nodded with a small smile.
“Let’s open it up.” I suggested and he did as I said. He handed me the bottle asking me where the glasses were. “Don’t know, don’t care..” I said as I took a sip from the bottle before handing it to him. Now I broke my own rule, but I guess after this terrible day I was allowed to break my own rule.
“Yeah, it’s not like it’s the first indirect kiss we had.” He chuckled, only this time…I couldn’t really laugh about it. I guess he noticed since he took a big sip and handed the bottle back to me.
“Hey where is your family? I ordered an extra large pizza for a reason.” He said looking at the pizza box on the coffee table.
“They ran away. Wooosshh.” I said making a gesture with my hands as if they disappeared.
“Ha! And you say my sound effects are bad.” I snickered. He was right. “Well, that is a waste of pizza..”
“Not so fast Uzumaki…” I said as I leaned towards the coffee table and opened the box. “It just so happens my stomach is growling.” I said grabbing two pieces. “Join me in some birthday pizza.” I said handing him the other slice.
“Ah, to your seventeenth birthday, and to many more wonderful birthdays.” He said as we pressed the pizza’s together as if we were toasting.
“Fuck, please no…Cheers to birthdays only coming once a year,“ I said before taking a bite. Yup…The extra cheese was amazing.
“So why did your family ran off? Didn’t you want them around?” He asked.
“Long story.” I said as I grabbed the bottle and took another sip.
“Well, I don’t really have a curfew.”
“It’s nothing but bullshit after bullshit.” I said as my pizza slice slipped and I ended up getting tomato sauce and cheese on my white blouse. The one day I tried to dress decent, this happened.
“What a waste,” I sighed.
“Owh you can rinse it with cold water and use a liquid detergent to get the stain off.” I looked up with a questionable look. How did he know this stuff?
“Ah I have to do laundry sometimes.” He gave his usual kind smile.
“And you still refuse to clean your room?”
“I blame my ADHD for my messy room…But yeah..I should really stop leaving everything half done in my room. Hey, if you take of your blouse I can help you get rid of that stain. Y’know, before it sets, dattebayo.”
“I am not wearing anything under this blouse.”
“Better.” He smirked and did the pervy eyebrow thing.
“I don’t know…This reminds me too much of some badly written smut,” I sniggered.
“Badly written? It is smooth as hell. Admit that you’re tempted.” He wiggled his eyebrow and made me laugh. I didn’t even know it was possible for someone to make such an expression, but I guess that either I’m in an anime or Naruto is the one that jumped to another universe.
“You got me there.” I said unbuttoning my blouse in a teasing way. Slowly while giving him one of those ‘seducing looks’.
“Is that something you read in smutty fanfictions too?” I stopped unbuttoning my shirt.
“How did you know?”
“Izuna really doesn’t know his boundaries when it comes to tweeting about his personal life. That is also why Kakashi-sensei knew you had diarrhea the last time you didn’t show up in class. He didn’t mind saying that outloud either.”
“What? did he say that Sasuke’s bullshit comes out of the right place now?” I asked seriously, making Naruto laugh.
“I wish. How do you make these things up on the spot.” He asked and I raised my shoulders.
“My only talent. I can speak fluent sarcasm.”
“What are you saying, dattebayo! Did you forget how you can beat the shit out of people? You should join the special forces. Or start a criminal organisation. In that case you should call it Akatsuki.”
“Why Akatsuki?” I asked and Naruto’s expression turned serious.
“Because dawn and you are both beautiful.”
My eyes widened in surprise by his words and it took a few seconds for it to sink in. I shook my head an faked a laugh.
“Funny, stop joking.” I said, he cracked a smile. I quickly took a big sip out of the bottle. I can’t help but to feel a little down. I wanted to believe his compliment, but my mind directly argued that it was a joke, and that I will never be considered pretty.
I put the bottle down and leaned back, resting my arm on the back rest. Suddenly Naruto moved closer. As if he wasn’t close enough already. I gave him a strange look.
“Wait..Was this not an invitation for me to come closer?” He pointed at my arm.
“The fact that you believe I am that smooth is nice. But I’m not,” I said, shaking my head.
“Well it would be very smooth right now to pretend to stretch your arms and wrap one around my shoulder. Like in the movies, dattebayo.”
“That’s not even smooth.” I said.
“You know what is?” He finger poked my chest and I was confused until I lowered my gaze to his finger right on my nipple. I raised my head and turned it to Naruto. I saw this innocent look in his eyes as he started poking and chuckled.
“Don’t~” I pushed his hand away, moved my legs up and wrapped my arms around my chest. Why did he have to touch my nipple! Why can’t he be casual and just indicate I forgot to button my blouse and that my nipple was showing.
“Owwhh are your tiny nipples sensitive?” He teased and I felt my face heat up.
“They are not tiny, usuratonkachi!” Now I felt bad about my nipples.
“Owwhh is Sasu-chan a little embarrassed about his small nipples?”
“Now I wonder what the average size-”
“5.5 mm. I google-ed it once..”
“Owwh so you have always been aware of your tiny nipples?” He teased and I took my chance the moment he was of guard to wrap my legs around his middle and push him on the ground, pinning him under me.
“Stop teasing! I bet yours are below average too!” I said forcibly taking his shirt off.
“Neh, neh Sasuuu~ If you wanted a striptease you should have just said so.” He laughed as I threw his shirt somewhere behind me.
“I…I’m not really good at guessing. I’m going to grab a ruler, wait here.”
“What makes you even think I will stay?” He raised his torso and I pushed him back.
“Because I will chase you, and you have seen what I am capable of.”
I got up and rushed to my room where I grabbed my ruler from my desk. When I got back, I saw Naruto up from the ground. I frowned and grabbed him by his shoulder, moved my knee behind his, and flipped him over my shoulder on the couch before sitting on his hips. I rested one arm on the armrest as I glared at him.
“You know what I’m capable of…Right?” I repeated and I saw this smirk on his face.
“I know I should be scared and all, but after seeing your nipples, I wonder what else is below average.” He did the same pervy thing with his eyebrows again before looking down at my crotch.
I narrowed my eyes before slamming the ruler on his chest. Was it me, or was he getting more hyper? He moaned in pain before giving me the pouting face.
“Sassuuu~ you know I am not into S&M.” I felt my cheeks heat up and I covered my eyes with my hand before regaining myself.
“Lay still.” I demanded as I put the ruler next to his nipple.
“Wait, no fair. I should have an ice cube or something. Y’know, to get them…Fully…Erect.” He bursted out laughing and I couldn’t help but to crack a smile myself. He really chose the right words. I leaned in so my lips were right next to his ear.
“Owh don’t worry, I know a thing or two about that.” I whispered as I leaned in and licked his earlobe. I sat up straight and raised an eyebrow.
“….Damn it worked.” Naruto laughed again and I could feel his stomach muscles tightening as he was gasping for air. I put my hand on his chest to keep him still before measuring his nipple.
I looked surprised as I sat up.
“Annndd~ did I pass the test?” He asked.
“6.7 mm….” I heard him cheer.
“Above average, dattebayo.”
“That is the average female nipple length, Mrs. Uzumaki.” He stopped cheering right away.
“Damn it must be my mommie’s genes!”
“It might be… Mrs. Uzumaki.”
“Ohw please.. Mrs. Uzumaki is my mother, you can call me Naruko.” He leaned on his elbows as he winked.
“Naruko, eh?” I cocked my head. “Well, I can’t hurt a lady, can I?” I wanted to get off him, but he pulled me closer to him.
“You? Hurting me? Don’t be silly. You are just keeping me warm.” He said.
“Really? my cold heart keeps you warm?” I asked feeling my head getting pressed against Naruto’s chest.
“No since your nipples are so small, most of the heat goes-
“One more nipple joke and I am going to cut yours in half.” I got out of Naruto’s grip. I saw him bite his bottom lip, trying to hold back.
“STILL BIGGER THAN YOU HAVE!” He blurted out before laughing hysterically again. I felt a dark cloud appear above my head. I got off him.
“Mrs. Uzumaki… Can I kindly request you to fuck off?” I asked as I buttoned my blouse. I grabbed the bottle and took a big sip.
“Hey didn’t you have like… Kinda enough, dattebayo?” Naruto asked as he indicated to the bottle.
“It’s my freaking birthday, fuck off.” I said as I shoved my bangs away and sat on the piano bench. “For like….Two more hours.” I sighed having a sad smile on my face.
“You know what sucks the most? It sucks that I still hope… I still hope they will come back and make it up to me. I don’t want balloons or big presents. I don’t need to go to an expensive restaurant or…Chuck E. Cheese. Right now…I would be happy just being together and…Eating disgusting, overly decorated cake with my wrong age written on it and watch the fucking lion king.” I stared blankly ahead of me, shaking my head. “But that is not going to happen…And that feeling..It is crushing..” I shook my head, I noticed my head was slightly heavy.
“Hey…You never mentioned why your brothers ditched you on your birthday.” Naruto sat next to me on the small bench. I didn’t look at him and he put his phone down on top of the piano.
“What does it matter. Sulking about it won’t make them appear magically on the doorstep.” I sighed. I suddenly heard some random keys getting pressed. I looked at Naruto.
“My mom once taught me how to play happy birthday…But I was eight back then and I don’t remember it, but…I can try?” He gave me his typical Naruto smile.
“How about I play, and you sing, Naruko?”
“Deal!” He said and I cracked my fingers before playing. He started singing and it made me smile hearing him sing, even if it was false as fuck. I still loved every bit of it. I applauded when he finished the song.
“Beautiful.” I said. He pushed his elbow in my arm.
“Don’t mock me, bastard. I would love to hear you sing.”
“Owh, I am nothing compared to your amazing performance.” I chortled.
“Try me, bastard.” He said.
“I will sing, but if I sing better than you. You gotta give me something special.”
“Deal, but if you sing false. I will….Take your cat!” I let my head hang the moment he mentioned my cat.
“Uhm…She is not among the living anymore.” I felt a sweatdrop appear on my head. “I will take you to my gun range and you can shoot with my guns?” I offered and he nodded awkwardly.
“What happened to Sumo?”
“Uhm…You don’t want to know..” I muttered as I started playing. Do you know Gnash I hate you, i love you?” I asked him.
“Yeah such a great song, but that is duet right?”
“I can do both.” I looked at him from the corner of my eye before starting. Once I ended the song I raised my eyebrow.
“You know those times, when people fake to be bad at something before betting more money on something and then showing their true skills? Yeah, I feel like one of them right now.” Naruto said before applauding. “Congratulations, you screwed me over, bastard. What do you want?” He asked.
“Want to go to Chuck E. Cheese with me? I mean…Sometime next week.”
“Great idea, let’s take the little kids in my neighbourhood too. Come on Sasuke, that place is for kids.” Naruto scratched the back of his neck. I lowered my head slightly. I guess he was right. “I guess we can go to the arcade.”
I saw Naruto’s expression changed when he looked at me. I guess I wasn’t very good in hiding my expressions when I had alcohol in my system.
“What’s up with you and Chuck E. Cheese?” I could feel his hand tuck my fallen bangs away.
“It’s just …. It has been very crappy for me these past years, and I remembered the time I turned …I think 9. My parents brought me to Chuck E. Cheese with my friends and three of my brothers. Maddy didn’t want to come because he found it too childish. Obito had some exam the next day.“ I stared at the keys of the piano and I could see everything in front of me. My mother smiling and making pictures of me. My dad picking me up and holding me high in the sky. How my friends were playing tag and how Itachi wiped my face, that was covered in tomato sauce, while Shisui patted my head. It was all so great.
“I felt so happy there.” I smiled and I felt so pitiful,“ I was having so much fun, I was so loved…It was the best day of my life. I just ….I just wanted to relive that day..One..Just..One more time.” I took a deep breath before swinging my one leg on the other side. “Growing up sucks! Usuratonkachi, promise me not to grow up!” I grabbed Naruto’s shoulders, shaking him around.
“Sasuke.” He grabbed my wrists. “Change your shirt, we are going to the arcade!” He said, having this determined look on his face.
“Nah, it’s pretty late-”
“No, no come on!” He pulled me up and grabbed his phone.
“Come on! You fought four army guys. You are like the black widow in real life. Don’t give me that shit about it being dangerous outside!”
“I guess, I gotta protect bae if he is so determined to go outside at this hour.”
“What?” Naruto looked confused as me.
“Gotta protect the moron.” I said before heading upstairs to change my shirt.
“Who knew that the arcade is running out of business. Obito will be shocked.” I said as we walked in and saw, practically, nobody in there.
“Hey, no lines.” Naruto said as he grabbed my arm and ran towards what appeared to be one of his favourite games.
“Ha…I expected you to like Just Dance or something, but guess skee ball is more your thing.” I laughed as I examined the ball in my hand.
“Of course. Who doesn’t love balls? ….That came out wrong…” Naruto laughed as he grabbed one of the balls.
“Bet ya I can get more points than you?” He said.
“Bet is on.” I said as I saw him throw the ball right in the left corner. I was quite impressed as I did the same thing.
“Aaah copying my technique!” Naruto laughed as he threw some more balls.
“Naturally.” I said.
We ended up playing a bunch of games. Shooting zombies, skeeïng, Just Dance, more shooting games, riding motorcycles, racing in cars and riding a mechanical bull. We ended up making pictures at a photo booth and grabbed our winning tickets to see what we can get.
“Can I have the fox ears, please?” Naruto proudly put his winning tickets on the table. The man laughed seeing how excited Naruto was.
“Can I have the voltron defender of the universe limited edition ring?” I said, putting my tickets on the counter. Naruto gave me a weird look, but the guy in the counter seemed to be fan.
“You are now the proud protector of the planet Arus.” The man said, handing me the ring.
“And you can pretend to have fox ears.” The man said giving Naruto his fox ears. He put them on and gave me a childish smile as he pointed to the ears.
“How do they look?” He asked.
“Amazing, foxy lady.”
“Lady?” He looked confused.
“With your female nipples.” I couldn’t help but to smirk as his expression changed to a blank one.
“Defender of the universe Arus…You bet your damn ass to run.” He threatened and I did. I ran outside the arcade and I heard the man behind the counter chuckle. Naruto followed me, running right behind me.
“Come back, tiny nipples! Why don’t you ever run this fast during P.E?!” He shouted and I laughed as I ran in the park, over the bridge on the hill. He ended up tackling me from behind. We rolled around before standing still somewhere near the end of the hill.
I was panting slightly as we stared at the night sky.
“This night is amazing…” I said as I looked at the bright stars.
“It is beautiful isn’t it?” I heard Naruto say.
“Yeah…Yeah it is.” I said turning my head, meeting his eyes. I wonder how long he was looking. “Thank you…For everything.” I said, raising my hand towards the sky as if I could reach it. I looked at my Voltron ring, taking it off my middle finger. I rolled on my stomach and leaned over Naruto.
“Here…” I said grabbing his hand and putting the ring on his middle finger.
“Why? I can’t even take care of myself, let alone the planet Arus.”
“You are the protector of planet Sasuke and you seemed to be very good at it.” I said before lying down on the grass.
“I will wear this ring with dignity and pride.”
“You better, that is limited edition. 3500 tickets.” I said.
“Aaah the pressure is too much!” I laughed at his little freak out.