outnumbered final

Henry shushes a giggling Lucy as he balances Ava carefully in his arms so they can creep down the hallway. 

“Ready?” he whispers. 

Lucy nods bouncing excitedly by his feet. Once Henry pushes open the door she runs into the room before leaping onto their mothers’ bed landing on top of Emma. 

“What the fu-” Emma trails off as she sees Lucy. She moves to warn Regina only for Henry to slowly drop Ava onto her. Once they’re settled Henry drops down next to Emma. 

“Okay Luce go!” Henry calls. As he does the three of them hug/crush their Moms. 

Emma grins sitting up and tickling Lucy whilst Regina blinks away sleep and reaches for Ava who’s currently hitting her with a stuffed bunny. 

“What’s with the dogpile kids?” Emma asks. 

“Henry says it’s Mommy’s Day!” Lucy declares. 

“Mama,” Ava agrees pointing to both women. 

Regina beams, “Henry’s right, good morning my babies.” 

“Happy You Day Mommy,” Lucy replies. 

Emma smiles looping one arm around Henry, “Well done kid. You finally outnumber us…so presents?” 

Henry grins at her, “Who needs presents when you have us?” 

Steve Rogers, Human Dorito

summary: When one of your teammates complicates a simple mission, he ends up only making it worse for himself.

pairing: Bucky x Reader, Steve x Reader (Platonic)
word count: 1606
warning: None, one cuss word I guess. Just fluffy humour 
a/n: I honestly live for writing silly and sarcastic stories lol. This was just really fun and I hope you all like it!!

Originally posted by stuckysource

It was supposed to be a simple snatch and grab mission. It was supposed to take no longer than thirty minutes, tops. It was not supposed to turn into the shit show that it so eloquently had become. You were definitely going to destroy that little patriotic prick.

The building you were infiltrating appeared long abandoned, but what it lacked in cleanliness it more than made up for in annoying hidden triggers. You and Steve were inside heading towards the mainframe to access the data point while Sam and Bucky patrolled the outer grounds. Everything was going fine until Dumb-Dumb Rogers triggered a silent alarm, quickly setting forth all-out chaos. Red lights began flashing brightly and obnoxiously while a siren wailed throughout the building.

“Dammit Steve, you big Dorito! What the hell did you do?!” you cried out over the assault of lights and sounds, resisting the urge the smack the big blonde bozo.

Keep reading

The Joker x Reader  4 (part 1)

Read Part 2 here:  


Prequel 1:


        You’re slowly starting to come back to your senses. You hear muffled laughter and you feel the van moving. Everything hurts, especially the blow to your head.

        “Let’s see how he likes her now” somebody snickers. More laughter. “Don’t forget to put the present in her purse. Let’s drop her at his penthouse before she wakes up. I don’t want the bitch to break more of our bones.”

        You try to open your eyes, but you can’t. You sense you’re being moved and the pain makes you whimper.

       “Quickly, drop her on the stairs!”

      Your body being slammed on the concrete feels like a thousand knifes piercing your flesh. You hear tires screeching, then gun shots. “Omg, miss Y/N!”  “Is that Frost?” you wonder, finally managing to open your eyes. It is him. You sigh in relief. He fires a few more shots after the van; afterwards he picks you up in his arms, carrying you inside the building.

      “Boss!!!! Boss!!!” he screams, as you see the other henchmen stopping in disbelief when you two pass by.

    “What is…” you see J rushing out of the office, stopping in his tracks at the horrible view in front of his eyes. “it?…”  He lifts his arms, speechless, signaling Frost to give you over to him. You try to smile as he squeezes you tight, his blue eyes darkened. He’s shaking. “Where is… Dr. Quinzel?”he growls, “did anybody… fucking call her?” he suddenly shouts like a madman, making you jump.

       “Yes, sir, she’s coming, 30 minutes tops!” Kevin answers.

     “Tell her she doesn’t have 30 minutes!!!!” he yells over his shoulder, already heading towards the elevator. “Frost, come!” J commands, straining himself to lift you higher in his arms. You moan in pain, clenching your fists at his shirt. “I’m sorry, baby doll, I didn’t mean to do that,” he whispers touching your cheek with his face.

       Once on the 30th floor, you know you’re home. J takes you to your master bedroom and carefully places you on the bed. It is then when he notices the little piece of paper stapled to your torn dress: “Don’t worry, we used condoms, we don’t want to catch crazy from your whore :)  “. He takes a deep breath, his eyes getting watery. He examines you and he sees the aftermath in all its debilitating, gory truth: your dress is a mess, all cut to pieces, your legs scratched, bruised, dry blood all over. “God damn it…” he exhales, passing his fingers through his green hair. “God..damn…it” he looks at you, mortified. You bite your lip, trying to hold your tears in, while attempting to cover yourself with the sheets. You can’t even look at him anymore. He takes a sit right by you, turning your face towards him. “Who touched my girl?” he asks, his jaw clenched, caressing your lips. “Who did this?…Who had the nerve… to touch… MY FUCKING GIRL??!!”  He screams so loud that Frost takes a step backwards.  J is starting to lose control. He can’t bear the thought that somebody else touched and hurt you so badly.

         “ S..sir…” Frost says, hesitant. “She had this with her.” He hands over your purse to the Joker. They drew a smiley face on it and wrote: “Surprise Inside”. J sniffles opening the purse, and takes out a DVD. He looks at it and gives it back to his henchman: “Go and put it in the other room, I’m coming shortly. “ He suddenly seems so calm.  Frost nods in agreement and leaves the bedroom.

        “Baby doll, let’s get you cleaned up, the good doctor will be here soon.” He gently helps you up and takes you to the bathroom. You walk slowly, holding on to him, tears starting to fall from your eyes. He doesn’t say anything; he just turns on the water in the bathtub, takes your clothes off and slowly places you inside. The water feels good, but it burns so bad. You instinctively touch your hot spot, letting out a cry.  

         You hear him gulp, his eyes checking you out, worried sick. “Y/N…they are all dead…all of them…do you hear me?” He kneels by the bathtub, taking your hand and covering it in kisses. “I will kill them all… I will find them and kill them all… Was it Kane and his men? Was it them that took you?…” You blink “yes”. He tilts his head . “I’m sorry this happened to you, baby doll…” he mumbles, trying to get up, defeated.

         “Puddin…” you utter, grabbing him and pulling him down so you can hug him. “ I was so scared…” He suddenly wraps your arms around you so tight you feel you can’t breathe. But you don’t want him to let go so you don’t complain. It is heaven to fill him so close to you again after what happened, so comforting.


      The Joker left you in the bathtub to relax, waiting for Dr. Quinzel.  Just you and your demons now. You stare at the sealing, deep in thought. How long has it been? Almost 10 years. 10 years since you two met on your 26th birthday at one of his clubs. He took an interest in you because you match his crazy. And you couldn’t resist that devious smile. Two notorious, insane criminals that have nothing else going for themselves in this world except your loyalty to each other. That’s about it.

         A sudden thump wakes you up to reality. You move a little bit, wrapp yourself in a big towel and get out of the bathtub. As you pass by the mirror, you take a glimpse at your reflection . Wow, what a sight! You don’t really look like yourself anymore : your face swollen, cut on your lip, that big bump on your head… You shiver, parting your long, red hair while heading for the hallway. Where is J?…

       You hear voices coming from the office by your master bedroom. You approach slowly, your heart beating louder and louder as you recognize the screams: they’re yours. The Joker is sitting on the couch, watching the video it was send to him. He doesn’t notice you’re there.

      “Grab her!!! Grab her, what the hell, she’s a woman!” Kane giggles as he watches you hit a few of his men with your baseball bath. You hear the sound of broken bones you crush and cussing, cornered in the small room, defending yourself with that crazy grin on your face. “Who’s next, you jerks ?” you say while swinging the weapon with   both hands. There must be about 20 men around you.

       “Come on, don’t be pussies, she’s all alone!” Kane claps. “Chop-chop, lads, we don’t have all night!” All of them regroup and charge, you are outnumbered.
“Jeez, finally, you guys got me worried, letting a woman bit your asses.” Kane says, satisfied. You struggle to escape; you scratch and bite whatever you can.

“Ohhhhh, Mistah J, you have a feisty one, I like that.” He turns towards the camera, smiling. You watch yourself being pinned to the table, while Kane starts touching you all over. You scream in disgust, spitting on him. “Hey, hey, stop!” he punches you in the face and you start laughing, licking your bloody lips. “Crazy bitch!” he screams, annoyed. “Hey, hey, tell me something.” He grabs your hair, pulling it hard, forcing you to look at him. “Hey, beautiful, are the rumors true?… Is it true you don’t sleep with anyone else but the Clown? That you are only his? And he doesn’t screw no other hoe but you? Is it true you have that pact? Hmmm?”

          You grunt under his weight: “Wouldn’t you like to know, asshole?” He slaps you, turning towards the camera again. “Well, Mistah J, you should have thought twice before trying to take over my side of town. Gotham is not yours, ok? “He flips off the camera, satisfied. “ Well, we got this sweettttt princess of yours and we will show her what she’s been missing out in the last years. Hit her!” You see one of his men holding your baseball bath and you cringe as you see yourself passing out on camera from the impact.

         “Stop watching this!” you cry out, walking in front of the TV and turning it off. J gets up, startled. “ I don’t even…I don’t even know how many there were…I didn’t give them permission to touch me… Only you… can do that…” you find yourself chocking in your own words and you have to stop. “Baby doll…”He moves towards you, breathing heavily from the anguish and remorse he fells.  He wasn’t there to protect his only treasure.

          “I’m not your doll anymore, J… ”,you say stepping back , not being able to control your sobbing, all these horrible emotions taking over. You reach out to grab your gun from the table and you point it to your head. “Find yourself another one.” Your fingers are shaky on the trigger. They are usually not. It’s because of him, you think before he interrupts the voices in your head.

       “I don’t want another one…” the Joker whispers, taking off his purple shirt, revealing the big tattoo he has on his chest with your name on it. He lifts his hands in surrender, coming closer to you. “Remember when we got our tattoos? You have my name on your skin and I have yours. Just you and me against the world, right, baby doll?”

          You start to have doubts. But why would he want a broken doll?…

         “Lower the gun, Y/N… Please?… For me?…If you pull the trigger, you kill me too…” Your heart feels like it’s going to shred to pieces. He gets closer, inches away from you. “You don’t want to kill me now, do you?”

         You shake your head in denial, whiping your tears. ”Never…of course not…” He slowly takes the gun from your hand and you surrender. J lifts you in his arms and kisses you softly, not wanting to cause you any more harm. “Avenge me…” you plead, looking in his icy blue eyes while kissing him back. “Kill them all!“

         “Gotham will burn!” he promises, his face suddenly lighting up with a scary smile. His queen will have revenge.

Also read - MASTERLIST :


Hai, there!

 It’s the end of yet another work week, and it wasn’t too terrible. In fact, I took a half day Friday because it wasn’t very busy at work, and I have plenty of hours for my paycheck when I get paid on Wednesday. Pretty much took a walk, ate and had a 2 hour nap Friday afternoon. It was glorious.

 The rest of the work week was pretty uneventful. Still seeing plenty of puppy and kitten adoptions, but didn’t get a chance to get any pictures, so you’ll just have to settle with one of me relaxing this afternoon - and relaxing I am.

 Today is unusually warm - about 85 degrees - so I have two fans in my room going at once, making sure my roommates dog’s are full in the water bowl, and that’s about all I want to do for the rest of the day. I may take a late walk when it cools off, but I’m not sure, I’ll just have to see how I feel.

 Hm. Other than that, I guess I did manage to toss all of my non-girl jeans, and am going through my clothes in general tossing stuff I don’t wear. My collection of clothes is creeping up there, and I’m starting to slowly accumulate things that I like and I’m finally able to start tossing a bunch of guy-things I haven’t worn - some in over a year now. After the purge my girl clothes will finally outnumber anything else I own.

 Truthfully the girl clothes just may outnumber the others right now, really. I haven’t worn guy jeans in over 6 months with an exception of once or twice, and found them to be too uncomfortable now, so I stopped, and am now just tossing them. Shirts, I wear one or two pairs of guy shirts, but the more recent woman’s shirts I have aren’t very girly, so I have those as an option for every day wear. Really then I think by the end of the weekend I may just have a few clothes items left from my old life. Actually, I’ll make sure of it.

 Plans wise for the holiday weekend, besides tossing clothes, (it is Memorial day on Monday in the US), I may pop over to my friend’s place to play or just watch some board games that some friends will be playing and have some food, chat etc. Other than that, the usual Bible Study on Monday morning, and that’s about it for the weekend overall. It will be a hot one out there, so my walks will have to be in the early morning or late evening shortly before the sun goes down, I’m burning up too easily in 75 degree weather, let alone what the 85 degrees will do to me.

 I do hope you have all had a nice week, and are having a great weekend!

 - Lana

anonymous asked:

[1/2] The more I think about the MW betrayal, the less sense it makes. Sure, Le/xa saved some of her warriors in the short-term, but isn't she supposed to be a 'greater good' thinker who thinks her warriors are meant to die for her? The long-term outcome of that decision, if MW had defeated the sky people as she assumed, would have been that the mountain men would be able to go outside, and thus, a even bigger threat to her people.

[2/2] Unless her actual long-term goal to keep the coalition together, fighting a common enemy and maintaining her power. 3A shows that she was wrong about that. I’m struggling to understand this great, visionary leader that some people see her as when all of her plans and ideas ultimately failed.

The reason why Lxa’s betrayal doesn’t make sense with the excuses she gave is because they are excuses. She is either lying to Clarke and her people or she is lying to herself. Or both. Either she’s convinced herself that her actions were the right thing to do (which they weren’t) or she is telling people they are the right thing, but knows all the while she is betraying not just Clarke and the sky people, but also her own people. 

The excuses about saving her captured people and keeping her poor, defenseless giant horde of terrifying, trained, armed and dangerous warriors from death in a war against the grossly outnumbered, finally defenseless (thanks sky crew) and an inch from defeated MW guards not only makes no sense tactically, it’s also a direct contradiction of what she just told Clarke, that her warriors were born to die for her. Also a direct contradiction of what she just told her giant army about finally getting vengeance, because as we all know, for the grounders BLOOD MUST HAVE BLOOD. Also, the concept that this deal Lxa made was good for her people rather than actually freeing their enemies from their prison, so that they could unleash their superior technology and enslave the people and steal their land, does not make sense.

Therefore, when one statement contradicts ALL the other statements and actions that the speaker has already made, that one statement is either a lie, or just wrong. Therefore. “I did it for my people,” is bullshit. Simple logic. 

And I agree with you. The only way her betrayal makes sense is not “I did it for my people,” but “I did it for my continued power.” Now if she conflates her own power with what is good for her people, that would allow her statement “I did it for my people” to be not a lie. But it’s also a wrong statement. It would make her an egotist who thinks her power and her decisions are the best thing, simply because she made them. This could definitely be it. She is given power by divine right, The Flame, so therefore in her mind, her power is what’s best for her people. Anyone who believes that The Flame means she can do no wrong will agree with her. Also anyone who thinks that Lxa can do no wrong simply because they love her. 

So keeping their traditional enemy means keeping the coalition together, which means her power base remains. Which means she gets to continue having absolute power over her people, making the decisions the divine right indicates are the best thing for her people.

Of course the narrative flat out destroys this belief. Her people do NOT think it is the best thing. Lincoln, Indra, Nia, Titus, Niylah, Echo, Roan, villagers. Basically EVERY GROUNDER who gets a chance to speak says that Lxa is wrong, has treated the sky people wrong, has treated Clarke wrong, has treated the warriors wrong, has treated the villagers wrong, has no honor, is making the wrong choices, is leading them all into doom and is going to get herself killed over it. 

And this is what happens. 

So yeah. Lxa was supposed to be a visionary leader. She started out as one before the show started and unified the grounders with the coalition to fight their greater enemy. I don’t know. We like to think that it was love of Clarke that brought her low, but I can’t help thinking that it was love of power that brought her low. It was her own fatal flaws.

She had a taste of what it was like to lead all the coalition, all the warriors and she liked it. I’ll be told that I don’t understand Lxa, but take a look at Lxa’s look of lust when she’s speaking to her army before they attack Mount Weather. Take a look at the high she’s getting from being at the head of all that power. Just look. What is that? She likes it. And it also fits in with her actions at TonDC. She says she let TonDC blow to save Bellamy, but she never believed that Bellamy could do it in the first place. HOWEVER, TonDC did conveniently hold ALL of the coalition leaders who had probably been challenging her since she came to power. boom. One bomb. No more challengers, except for Nia who never showed. How CONVENIENT. Do you think the people who those coalition leaders represented are going to buy “I did it for my people?”

If Clarke and the sky people help them defeat their greatest enemy, she’s not getting that power anymore, and she’ll have to share glory with Clarke and her sky people, who, by the way, have already defeated them in battle. When her mighty warriors should have easily won. Hmm. 

So instead we have, at the end of season 3, a Lxa who no longer has challengers. The coalition leaders are all dead, the sky people and Clarke have been doomed. Her deal with MW has the mountain men nominally as allies, but no one believes that will actually stick. What she has is a danger that she can continue to wield over the clans to get them to keep fighting under her command. For her people? The people have been screwed. Warriors. Villagers. Coalition. Screwed.

So yeah. The statements of Lxa fans, within the narrative and within the fandom, say that Lxa is a visionary leader who is doing what is right for her people, but the narrative itself tells a different story. It does not fit with the hype. Lxa WAS a visionary leader. Past tense. She lost her vision, and failed in her goals, ultimately dying for her flaws. Tragic hero, not epic.