outhousers

the signs as things my uncle has done
  • aries: abandoned my 4 year old father in the woods
  • taurus: accidentally burned down a cornfield
  • gemini: tried to smuggle himself into thailand by stowing away on an air force plane
  • cancer: totaled a car before he could legally drive by ripping off the steering wheel at 60 miles an hour and driving into a ditch
  • leo: drove a tractor leaking gasoline through a fire
  • virgo: stole his brother's car while he was playing tennis and then drove up as he was furiously walking to the police station and offered him a ride
  • libra: convinced another brother to throw a rock down the outhouse and watched as he proceeded to get shit splashed on his face
  • scorpio: tried to drive a car with no brakes by welding a pipe to the emergency brake and using that instead and nearly died
  • sagittarius: convinced his 16 year old brother he could control their stereo with his mind
  • capricorn: set a couch on fire with my 3 year old aunt still sitting on it
  • aquarius: almost drove off a cliff into a strip mine while trying to round up the cows
  • pisces: bought a real sword and incorporated it into his wedding proposal
a Short Accounte of some unusual and moste Exceptionall Out-houses, discovered by the author through Out her many travels across Azerothe, and given frank Ratings in accordance with their quality and Intrigue

1. The Dalaran Jack Shack

location: the walls outside of dalaran in the broken isles
description: i have already given a brief account of this outhouse in a previous post but, because it is a most striking specimen, i shall endeavor to describe it again here. outside of dalaran there is an outhouse that is, in of itself, fairly standard. through the portcullis on the door one can immediately see a pin up of a goblin woman affixéd to the wall opposite. if the observer then proceeds to jump, or to angle the camera downwards, they can then glimpse inside the outhouse a nude human male, who cannot be targeted as has no name. the implication, doubtless, is that this man is perpetually jacking it hardcore on kirin tor municipal property
rating: a solid 7/10. the premise of this out-house is a most puerile one, but the Joake is undertaken with great simplicity and brevity. in the parlance of the times i must remark that i would, indeed, Jack Again

2. The Deadliest Poop House in Hellfire

location: expedition point in hellfire peninsula 
description: behind the vast and smoldering corpse of a fel reaver stands two outhouses, so situated as to resemble robust wooden sentinels observing the scene before them. the first of these outhouses is unremarkable. the second, which is pictured here, has before it the skeleton of some unfortunate, cradling a bottle in their last moments, holding the door shut with what little is left of their body. an alliance soldier patrols endlessly in front of this outhouse, her sword drawn and her expression grim, as if to prevent any hapless venturer from attempting to enter it. there appears to be nothing inside
rating: 8.5/10. the fact that this is in hellfire peninsula, a zone i hate, is a mark against it, but i will admit that there is a level of enigma here that is hard to ignore. there is a story to this outhouse, a grave and frightful story, and one we will never quite know the true beginning, middle, or end of

3. Tim Burton’s Corpse Bride

location: brill, in tirisfal glades, behind the inn
description: the outhouse itself is plain, drab, and dutifully silent, as all outhouses ought to be. what makes this outhouse notable is the most curious scene in which it is embroiled. a forsaken woman of silent demeanor and haunting beauty stands outside of this outhouse for all of the day and all of the night, dressed in a sombre black wedding dress and grasping roses of a similar hue (not pictured) in her bony hand. no explanation is given for her presence in this location – the outhouse itself is perpetually vacant, making it unlikely that she is simply waiting in line to use it. next to the outhouse is an open coffin full of turds
rating: 10/10. this is the perfect outhouse set up and if i die ever i hope i also get to spend all of eternity standing around poop coffins in a fancy dress

When Ruth Gruber boarded the ship “Runnymede Park,” the passengers cried out, “Take pictures! Show our floating Auschwitz to the world!” Gruber was the only journalist to bring a camera on board. Her groundbreaking work as a photojournalist spanned more than five decades on four continents.
📷 The prisoners were squeezed together in the dark hold of the ship. There were no beds, no chairs, and no privacy. Refugees suffered from water deprivation, unbearable crowding, and abominable sanitary conditions. Each prisoner was allowed on the upper deck once a day to use the outhouse, with only six holes, Runnymede Park, Port de Bouc, France, August 22, 1947. ©Estate of Ruth Gruber, courtesy ICP.

flickr

Homer ~ New York ~ Sunflower House ~ Historic ~ Queen Anne Architecture by Onasill ~ Bill Badzo
Via Flickr:
This home, located on the corner of North Main Street and Clinton Street, is a fine example of the Queen Anne style of architecture. It was built in 1881 for the William Kellogg family, and was designed by Archimedes Russell, a well-known architect from Syracuse. His fondness for the sunflower symbol, typical of the 1880′s, is prominently featured on the gables of the house, the side entry door, the main staircase, and even the weathervane. Many original features still exist, including beautiful stained glass windows, parquet floors, fantastic woodwork, five working fireplaces, and two indoor “inhouses” (as opposed to “outhouses”)On the corner of Main and Clinton is perhaps what is Homer’s most famous Victorian, designed by Archimedes Russell, a well-known architect from Syracuse.

someone help me out I have a very specific scene from a movie (TV show??) stuck in my head where there’s like a fuckn…deserted dirt back road in the desert and some sorta old man just fuckin sitting in a lawnchair charging people twenty bucks to use his shitty little wooden outhouse but the outhouse is like a giant fancy sauna when u enter it??? Was this a fever dream or a scene in an early 2000’s music video help me I’m losing sleep over this