romancingthecage  asked:

I didn't say Sandor is a dog, I was saying if even dogs can love, why do you deny that Sandor can love? He's not a dog, that was the point. He's a man. And I am not talking in the future, I'm talking the present, in terms of the story. I read your piece, and didn't see that you were saying that he loves her now. I think it's pretty clear he loves her now. No need to be unkind about it, we just disagree.

….sigh…. Learn to read, it helps.

Fuck it, never mind, I’m just going to repeat myself, since evidently highlighting is not enough. It’s not that Sandor doesn’t love Sansa, but he doesn’t even know what love is, what these feelings are that make him so confused and angry. He doesn’t understand how to express his feelings in a healthy way. Furthermore, it was impossible at that time for him to express his feelings in a healthy way for many reasons – for one, he was in the process of a mental breakdown, his worldview and sense of self shattered – and for another, that Sansa was twelve and should not have to deal with Sandor’s incredibly fucked up mental state.

And most importantly, there is a difference between what I called Sandor’s “broken love” – feelings of passion and desire and violent protectiveness, combined with a need to crush Sansa’s innocence to show her the truth of the world, combined with the hate of himself for having all these feelings (for the need to protect like a knight protects a maiden, the guilt for having failed to protect her, the guilt for desiring her, for being so weak that he feels guilt), especially because she’s twelve and he knows it’s wrong to want… everything he wants from her – and real genuine healthy love.

My hope is that Sandor gets his head straightened out, so that healthy love is possible in the future, for both of them.

I hope that helps. And by the way, if you come back saying “oh, the fact she was 12 doesn’t mean anything because that’s how it was back then” I will straight up block you. (Same for anyone else, thanks.)

anonymous asked:

Hey how do I know if T is right for me? (And would you like me to specify what I want/don't want and we can determine it that way?)

Lee says:

T is not a pick and mix, you can’t get some changes and not others, and as a result you have to weigh up the pros and cons as to how much you want T. It’s all or nothing, although you can do low-dose T and have the changes happen slower so you can stop when you’ve had enough.

Deciding if you want to go on T is a personal and individual thing- someone else can’t make the decision for you no matter what information they have. 

One thing that can help is spending time watching people’s transition videos on YouTube, and their transition posts on Tumblr and see how you feel about it. Are you curious out of curiosity, or does it sound appealing to you? Do you feel jealous of them, or not sure?

When I was thinking about it, I made a list of the changes and what I thought of them. I’m a firm believer in the power of making lists to decide things, so you could make a pro/cons list of taking T.

You can’t ask someone else what to do even if you list the things you want and don’t want. Someone can say “Since you want these 3 changes and don’t want those 4 so that means you shouldn’t start T since you dislike more changes than you like” but that isn’t a good way to decide. 

You have to weight which changes matter to you the most which is something only you can know. Someone may only want one change from T for example- more facial and body hair- but if it’s worth the other changes for them then they might decide to start T even if they don’t like the other changes as much. 

You have to decide whether the changes on T you want are worth the other changes you aren’t as excited for. Some changes are permanent so it’s important to only start T if you’re reasonably sure that you’re okay with the permanent changes. You don’t want to start T to find that it only makes you more uncomfortable.

Followers, anything to add?

anonymous asked:

What are some alternatives to Estrogen besides a shot?

Harper says:

Wikipedia says:
Estrogens may be administered orally, sublingually, transdermally (via patch), topically (via gel), by intramuscular or subcutaneous injection, or by an implant.

The Trans Care Project says:
Estrogen can be taken in different ways:
•pill (oral application)
•skin patch or gel (transdermal application)
•injection (intramuscular application)