Humans are Space Orcs - Injuries
I have been loving this tag so much for so long, I think about it all the time. I especially love ones where aliens react to humans getting injuries that the humans are super chill about. What if a human on an alien crew did something and ended up getting a huge smack to the head? Like black and purple bruises, eye swollen shut, the works
Captain Kar’rim scuttled down the corridor as fast as he could. He had just got word that Kate, one of the three humans on the crew, had sustained major head injuries.
From the brief report he had been sent, Human Kate, as well as one of the other humans, Vincent, had been spending their allotted recreation time playing what they called “baseball.” It was something they often did. It consisted of the two of them throwing a small white ball back and forth at each other at high velocity. It didn’t see like it was much of a game, but the humans assured Kar’rim that an actual game of this baseball was a favorite past-time among their kind.
Typical that such a dangerous activity would be considered a human past-time, he thought, clicking his mandibles in a mixture of annoyance and anxiety.
According to the report, there had been a slight miscalculation on Kate’s part of the trajectory of the ball. Instead of landing in her glove, it hit her in her face. HER FACE! Kar’rim had not yet lost a member of his crew on any voyage. A fact he was very proud of. He was not going to lose that record because of a human game of all things!
Kar’rim reached the medical bay. He spotted Demfar, the crew’s medic trying, unsuccessfully trying to use whatever tentacles could be spared to shoo an effyn and two humans away from a hospital bed.
“Demfar, how is she?” He could see the answer to his question as soon as he asked it. Human Kate lay on the bed, her face looked almost unrecognizable. Her cheekbone and brow were so swollen, he couldn’t even see her left eye. Alarming shades of blue and purple were spreading across the left side of her face. Demfar passed a small bag of ice to Kate, who moved it slowly across her injury.
“By all things bright and…Human Kate! Stay with us, you’re going to pull through!” Kar’rim wasn’t really sure about that last part, but it seemed like the right thing to say. It was positive. Reassuring. To both Kate and himself. It was a lie, nonetheless. He looked at Demfar, who was applying a copious amount of pungent oils to the human’s darkening skin.
How long does she have left to live? Kar’rim tried to send the question to Demfar silently, mentally willing the question to the medic’s brain. He didn’t want to ask aloud. It was rude to speak about death in front of the dying.
Neither Kar’rim nor Demfar possessed telepathic abilities, but Demfar seemed to pick up the question anyway.
“The humans have explained the situation to me. Human Kate will make a full recovery. As soon as I am finished checking for signs of a concussion, I will mend a few of the ruptured capillaries, and she will be free to go. The contusions and swelling should be gone in a day or two.” Having finished applying the oils, Demfar used a free tentacle to replace the lids to the oil vials and placed them in Kate’s hands. “Apply more of this whenever you get a chance until the ‘bruises’ fade.”
Kar’rim wasn’t sure if he heard the medic correctly. A day or two? Full recovery? Free to go? Had Demfar LOOKED at the patient?! He knew humans were hardy, but surely… these wounds?! The head trauma!? The report said the ball the humans had been “playing” with had been traveling an estimated 86 glatts per segment. An injury like that would have killed most species!
“What… what about her eye? Will she be able to see out of it again?”
“Ha, if not, it probably won’t affect her game any!” Laughed Vincent. Kar’rim turned toward him with surprise. “What happened to you being the starting catcher back home? You can’t even keep your eye on the ball!”
“You shouldn’t have thrown it if I wasn’t looking, ya’ chucklehead!” complained Kate as Demfar held a small humming machine up to the darkest part of her face. “I was distracted, Bett was on fire!”
“Bett is a booka, they’re almost always on fire,” laughed Vincent.
Demfar finished with the humming machine and straightened up. The darkest parts of Kate’s face were considerably lighter now. “You check out, you’re free to go.” Kate sat up and threw her legs over the side of the bed and stood up. “Don’t forget to apply the oils.”
“No prob, thanks Doc!” Kate called back as she left with her group. Kar’rim watched as they went, amazed. He knew humans were tough, their reputation was what had led him to eventually hire three onto his crew. What would have been a traumatic, life-threatening injury to many, humans seemed to see as just an inconvenience. With a sigh of relief, he muttered a phrase which had become very popular since the humans had joined the Galactic Alliance, “I’m glad they’re on our side.”