MARY SAYS: When I told my father I was going to marry Jake he said, ‘If you marry that man you will never set foot in this house again.’

He was horrified that I could contemplate marrying a black man, and I soon learned that most people felt the same way. The first years of our marriage living in Birmingham were hell — I cried every day, and barely ate. No one would speak to us, we couldn’t find anywhere to live because no one would rent to a black man, and we had no money.

Now it’s very hard to comprehend the prejudice we encountered, but you have to remember that there were hardly any black people in Britain in the Forties. I met Jake when he came over during the war from Trinidad, as part of the American forces stationed at the Burtonwood base near my home in Lancashire. We were at the same technical college. I was having typing and shorthand lessons and he’d been sent there for training by the Air Force. He was with a group of black friends and they called my friend and me over to talk. We didn’t even know they spoke English, but Jake and I got chatting. He quoted Shakespeare to me, which I loved.

A few weeks later we went for a picnic, but were spotted by a lady cycling past — two English girls with a group of black men was very shocking — and she reported me to my father, who banned me from seeing him again. Jake returned to Trinidad, but we carried on writing to each other, and a few years later he returned to the UK to get better paid work. 

He asked me to marry him, quite out of the blue, when I was only 19. My father threw me out, and I left with only one small suitcase to my name. No family came to our register office wedding in 1948.

But gradually life became easier. I got teaching jobs, ending up as a deputy head teacher. First Jake worked in a factory, then for the Post Office.

Slowly we made friends together, but it was so hard. I used to say to new friends: ‘Look, I have to tell you this before I invite you to my home — my husband is black.’

My father died when I was 30 and although we were reconciled by then, he never did approve of Jake.

Today we have been married for 63 years, and are still very much in love. I do not regret marrying him for an instant, despite all the pain we have suffered.

JAKE SAYS: I feel so fortunate to have met and married Mary, but it saddens me that we could not be accepted by society. Nowadays I say to young black people: ‘You have no idea what it used to be like.’

When I arrived in the UK I was subjected to abuse every day. Once I was on a bus and a man rubbed his hands on my neck and said: ‘I wanted to see if the dirt would come off.’

And back then you couldn’t work in an office — because a black man in an office with all the white girls wasn’t thought to be safe.


Finally finished:D I know so many of you have been asking me about my next wonderbat piece…and I abandoned my other one from instagram (I’ll get back to it later maybe) but I’m super excited to show you guys this!! I probably could have spent more time on it but ah I already spent so much and I’m pretty happy with how it turned out<3 (on dA and fb as well)

This photo is so lovely. They also look so happy… Bless them…

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2011 Miss Ireland Emma Waldron and her Nigerian boyfriend Manners Oshafi

Emma came under harsh criticism once people learned she was dating Mr. Oshafi and in an interview she discussed how she felt about it along with the fact that “racists” would not deter her love:

“Emma Waldron, 21, has been the victim of a vicious internet campaign because of her relationship with a black man and was forced to report an online poster targeting her with hateful and abusive racist comments.
Emma Waldron (21), who came fourth in Miss World, found herself at the centre of a racism row when an online tormentor branded her “disgusting” for being in a relationship with a black man.
Emma Waldron explained her shock at the attack, and encouraged Irish people to become more open minded, describing her relationship with her boyfriend as “beautiful”.
Speaking exclusively to the Herald, she said: “I don’t wish to talk in too much length about the issue as there are feelings involved and I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings by making an issue out of this.
“There is only one race, the human race. What matters in friendship and love is the heart and soul of the person you have a relationship with, not their colour, nationality, creed or background.
“I love my boyfriend with every cell in my body and nothing anyone says will change that.
“It upsets me that people have negative things to say about a love and friendship that is so beautiful.
“I love my boyfriend and nothing like this will ever affect us because we have love and that’s all we need. We don’t need others approval.”

Source: ukzambians.co.uk

Dear people who are in interracial relationships with black people,

What’s going on in America right now is YOUR PROBLEM TOO. Don’t sit back and watch, you need to make yourself aware of these issues and ask yourself what can I do to be supportive at a time like this. And if you are a black person in a interracial relationship, be sure to make your significant other aware of the magnitude of the situations occurring right now.

I’m all here for interracial relationships, but please make sure you discuss race relations with your partner. There is too much going on in this world regarding race to sit around and be intentionally ignorant.



11 Things Not to Say to Someone in an Interracial Relationship

Author: Ashlyn Sullivan

1. “How do your parents feel about you dating someone outside of your race?”

Wait. Are my parents supposed to be shocked or angry that I am dating a brilliant guy who treats me like a queen? No? OK, then why does the color of his skin matter?

2. “Don’t you want your kids to look like you?”

How will my children magically not look like me just because I am dating outside of my own race? They might have a different shade of skin or maybe even a different texture of hair, but maybe they’ll have my nose or my build or my smile.

3. “But you look so innocent!”

Oh, so my innocence has been robbed because I am dating someone of another race? Sure, makes total sense.

4. “It’s just a phase.”

No, dating a man who treats me with respect is not a phase. I hope your ignorance is though.

5. “You’re never going to be able to date someone [your race] again once they find out you’ve dated someone [other race].”

I am not worried about superficial, small-minded people who would be so concerned as to judge me for what race my ex-boyfriend was. Seriously? I don’t need people like that in my life anyway; we probably wouldn’t get along.

6. Any food-related jokes regarding to the race of their significant other.

No, I do not like hot chocolate just because I am dating an African-American guy. Don’t go there. It’s not even very original.

7. And any fetish phrases.

No, I am not a snowbunny, nor do I have junglefever.

8. “Once you go black…”

Are we still in third grade where we say stupid things just because it rhymes?

9. “Are you rebelling?” Or, “What did your parents do to piss you off?”

No, I am not rebelling by dating a man who shares the same values as me. My parents are actually pretty happy I’m with a guy who loves me completely, thanks.

10. “But aren’t you worried about [insert racist stereotype here]?”

Please tell me you’re kidding. Where do people come up with this stuff? If I’m in a relationship with him, I’m obviously not worried.

11. “Someone has daddy issues.”

*Sighs really long and loud.* I am dating outside my race because I fell in love with the person I am dating. There isn’t some weird formula as to how I ended up here. We are two humans who enjoy the same things in life. And no, I don’t have daddy issues.